Lance Whipple’s records revisited
Last year we wrote about Lance Whipple who claimed to be an Air Force Captain and a pararescueman. He’s been claiming that for years, I guess. We got his records from the National Personnel Records Center and they said that he had 35 days of service in September and October of 1979. A few weeks after we first wrote about him, he sent us his DD214 that he’d been showing around. Here, they are to jog your memory;
They are pretty bad forgeries – in fact, some of the worst I’ve seen. The most egregious mistake is that he left the reenlistment code from his original DD214 when he forged the documents, so down there at the bottom, where it says “2P”, well, that’s the code for for being AWOL or a deserter. Anyway, we’re all about fairness here at TAH, so we sent his DD214s to the National Personnel Records Center to see if they’d ring a bell with the technicians. We got this back the other day;
Nope, nuthin’. Mr Whipple’s claim is that we have the wrong Lance Whipple because his middle name is spelled ALLAN, but the NPRC tech spelled it ALLEN. Even though they had the DD214 with the name spelled the way Whipple spelled it on his DD214s, it still came back ALLEN on the FOIA. According to Intellius, there are 17 Lance Whipples in the United States, and there is only one Lance Allan Whipple, although there is another listed as Lance A. Whipple, but he’s 63 years old. So what would be the odds of there being a Lance Allan Whipple and a Lance Allen Whipple both in Air Force basic training in September 1979? Since I have some experience with the military misspelling names, I’d say that is much more likely.
Mrs. Whipple called me to say that she’d meet me somewhere in West Virginia, but she never mentioned a time or a place, so I’m not going to stand on the Ohio border waiting for her to decide when she wants to come. I’m also not wasting my time if all she has are those forged DD214s. I can see they’re forged from here. She was complaining that we hadn’t met yet last week in the Facebook comments despite the fact that she hadn’t made arrangements with me to meet. She’s also upset because I have a “donate” button and I’m rolling in cash, apparently.
Category: Phony soldiers, Valor Vultures
Have they “lawered up” yet? I see he’s still hiding behind her skirt, very classy. It’s obvious they’re playing horse, she’s the front end and Lance Whipple is being himself!
Somebody needs to explain the difference between cover and concealment to this fekktard.
Damn, another PU$$Y hiding behind his wife.
Good Jerb Mr Nipple
ChipNASA, It’s Whipple as in don’t squeeze the charmin. Hmmmm, so maybe this Whipple is an asswipe
“So what would be the odds of there being a Lance Allan Whipple and a Lance Allen Whipple both in Air Force basic training in September 1979?”
AND…who both entered active duty from Detroit, Michigan? (Noted on the FOIA response and the first DD214.)
And both left on October 15 (albeit years apart)?
Twin sons from a different mother? Maybe it is his evil twin who was raised in a parallel house on the opposite side of Detroit called bazaro Detroit.
My wife has an identical twin sister, and their first names are only different by one letter. Of course, their names are Khmer and the one letter difference is in how they’re rendered in English. The pronunciation is more different than the spelling would suggest.
The Navy also spelled my Grandpa’s name wrong when he enlisted in 1942. His last name was McDaniel. His DI called him “McDaniels.” He tried to correct the DI on his first day of training. Afterwards he accepted that he would be Seaman (later Gunner’s Mate) McDaniels for the duration of the war.
That being said, this Whipple douche is still a liar.
C’mon, this is all secondary minutia.
The real question is – does he still squeeze the Charmin? (smile)
Since he’s hiding under her skirt, there’s another important question.
Does the carpet match the drapes?
Inquiring minds, wanna know.
I’d bet it’s shag carpeting
In the words of Gene Wilder’s character in Young Frankenstein:
“That . . . goes without saying.” (smile)
Hondo, please don’t confuse the REAL Mr. Whipple with this Mr. Nippple.
https://youtu.be/L50tuag6iRs
Dunno, Ex-PH2 – if he went bald, shaved, got contacts, and gained weight, well . . . might be the same guy! (smile)
Not a chance, Hondo. The REAL Mr. Whipple was a charmin’ fellah.
This Lanceless Dick Nipple is not.
Thanks Ex-PH2. I was trying hard to remember the name Whipple and why it was in my head.
The redhead on the right is HOT! I’d hit it!
Who dresses a ginger in a green blouse?
Although I must confess I would hit them both…
Seconds!
Whatsa matter with you two? That’s somebody’s Mom you’re talking about! Shamey, shamey!
So he’s a faker in more ways than one?
Okay, well the REAL Mr. Whipple (Dick Wilson) was in LOT of TV shows from my younger days (like Maverick, McHale’s Navy, Bewitched, Twilight Zone)and much earlier was a pilot in the Royal Canadian Air Force during WWII. He died at the age of 91.
So I think the REAL Mr. Whipple stands much taller than this faker Whipple does.
He’s squeezing something to be sure, the question is what exactly is he squeezing and how is he getting away with it?
dammit I didn’t read down far enough. ya beat me tuit
That 214 is a hot mess. He is using using the wrong AFSCs for the time periods. He then cites an AFR as the authority, even though AFRs were all changed to AFIs in the early 90s.
Oh, come on, guys! Give him a break. His first name is Lance. He probably has a history of missing his mark… a lot.
This guy has less (fewer) balls than Lance Armstrong.
😉
“Lance a boil” or “Boil a Lance”??
I get confused sometimes…
Given his letting his wife defend him vice speaking up for himself . . . maybe “Lanceless” is more apropos.
I went to radio repair school with a guy named Lance. He was on the Marine Corps Accelerated Enlistment Program. He did his four year enlistment in two years and change. Then it was off to a life of adventure as a vagabond and carny worker. He eventually pulled his head out of his ass and got back on the straight and narrow. BTW, he has Marine Corps license plates. He was a Marine, but I think he scored a BCD. So, let me put it out there, should people booted from the military be entitled to military license plates?
The Super Bowl ‘Puppy Monkey Baby’ is more legit than this POS!
Are you suggesting that the Puppy Monkey Baby is NOT 100% legit? I’ll have you know that the Huffing(Glue) Post ran a story today about the Puppy Monkey Baby’s disturbing, if not alarming, commercial appearance. That means its legit.
I saw that as less of a sales ad and more of a PSA for why drugs are BAD.
I honestly don’t recall who was selling what with that creature, TOW. If you do, you need not enlighten me. Some things are best left forgotten.
Yeah, me either and frankly, I don’t think I’d buy whatever it was just based on that crappy ad.
You mean it was REAL? Thank God, I thought I was the only one who saw it! I thought maybe something I might have consumed in high school was back for a visit!
Keep rocking the lie, Lance. And as long as you do, people will call you and your enabler wife out on it.
Claimed 6 years and 5 months and only a “5” level, as a “Captain” with an enlist AFSC, um sure….. seems legit
didn’t she also claim that she was having us all investigated ? ? ?
BHWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! ! !
Here. If you follow the old link, you’ll know why I put this in here. It also means that your mind, like mine, is a terrible thing.
Sooner or later some enterprising individual is going to see a good idea and capitalize on it. Starting with “Mr. Whipple”, copies of HIS D D 214 and others sold as toilet tissue. First order for the sake of prosperity…I’ll take a pkg. of 24. Oh, and don’t forget the Bernastyass tissue!
Fuckstick on Full Retard…not a pretty sight…
Yup, Mrs Quibblebitch wrote the following on Facebook on January 26, quoted from the blog entry on December 3:
“Other than that, Military Affairs, Jag, a personal attorney and looking at Michigan State Police. As his wife….Im not letting this go. Who ever started this, I promise to bring to military law or my state law. I promise you I will not stop. I will push every button I can to get to the bottom of this. Then there is another court…Its called CIVIL. We receive a pention from the military for what he did. Momma is not done with you. just know.”
Hey, how’s that investigation going? Did your hearing aid short-circuit from the volume of laughter that came over the phone when you called MSP with your infantile whining?
Oh, and what “Military Affairs” office did you contact? Maybe you were talking about a category within the Ashley Madison web site?
Ever get an answer from any JAG office?
Just as I thought…more crickets…
PHHHHHHHHTTTTTTTTTTTT
Crickets…more crickets…
I doubt it is even his wife posting that. I bet it is Lance sockpuppeting since “she” wanted to meet Jonn in person–implied threat IMHO.
Mrs. Quibblebitch…..You are playing Russian Roulette with a six round revolver fully loaded and one in the chamber. For the sake of humanity, please aim it at your foot!
Loaded revolver HELL, she’s playing Russian Roulette with a locked & loaded semi-auto pistol!
OMG! What if she makes contact with 1SEAC? We’re ruined, I tell you…RUINED!!! Who sunk my battleship? More Jameson please!
Hahaha, GD. I caught that. Oh, Claw, where are you? You gotta see this great comment that GD posted.. 😉
He looks like Chaz Bono’s doppelgänger.
With that salad bar he could go on Dancing With the Stars to represent posers everywhere.
What brand of brain bleach do I use to get that comparison between him and Chaz out of my mind? Yecccchhhhhh 😀
Here ya go. (smile)
http://s3.photobucket.com/user/Joel7373/media/Psychlorox.jpg.html
Your generosity is underwhelming! heh
I think little Whipple got a ‘whif’ that a long war was on the horizon, as proved on Novemebr 4, 1979 … and he pussed out like a coward that he is!
I wonder if this stuff has been forwarded to his “buddies” in the Commanders Club of Lansing, MI? I’m sure that they with think twice about Lance being a member of “quality”…
As for “Heidi”… hubby was in for 45 days. Must have been a bed wetter, sleep walker or the umbilical cord didn’t stretch long enough from mom to Lance for him to make it through Basic Training.
Good catch: He is a Commanders Club Director with appointment through 2016.
Maybe we need to influence the board to do the right thing!
He is listed here:
http://www.commandersclubmi.org/Chain-of-Command.html
I am working on a different project so I can’t!
What the hell is wrong with these organizations these days? Do they not feel any shame when one of their beloved “brothers” is outed as a phony? Check this one out. Dude was in the Navy for 19 months total, discharged as an E-1, yet belonged to the Military officers Organization in Dothan, Al ….claiming he had been a Lt. Commander instead of a loser.
http://valorguardians.com/blog/?p=60312
With my warped mind, it would be funny to see someone accepted as a member of any organization, claiming he had served as a Nine Star General.
Tomato, Tomaato….35days is the same as pararescue. You guys should lighten up.
Question, do the medals, awards, decorations and badges,etc. awarded on the fake DD214 even match what he is wearing in the photo above?
Still a turd.
The actor who played Mr Whipple in the Charmin commercials is reported to have been an RAF fighter pilot in WWII. His name was Dick Wilson. His bio said that he was born in England, moved to Canada and, in 1954, became a US citizen. He lived to be 91 and is buried in LA. I have no way of knowing whether the RAF pilot business is true but it fits. A great many actors served in WW II, some of whom are surprising. One of my favs was an actor named William Windom. Some of you never heard of him. I liked the guy and it was only after he died that I learned he jumped with the 82nd in Market Garden as a member of the 508th PIR, Co B. His pic as a PFC appears in the link below, for those interested.
http://www.ww2-airborne.us/units/508/508_trp.html
Windom appeared in (among other productions) the original Star Trek, as well as starring in his own show for a single season, My World and Welcome To It. I rather liked that show. 🙂
Never knew he was in the 82nd, though.