It’s the Jackass Party’s Way, My Boys…

With sincere apologies to Mr. Kipling

We registered in precincts, so’s to have a place to vote,
When we served in far off Afghan, or somewhere’s far afloat.
We asked ’em for a few more days to ensure we made the count,
But Democrats tryin’ to block us, a lawsuit did they mount.

Yeah it’s heroes this, an’ heroes that, we hear it every day,
But it’s keep their votes from countin’ boys* when the heroes are away,
When the heroes are away, my boys, when the heroes are away,
They’ll keep our votes from countin’ boys, the Democratic way.

We vote mostly God n’ country, an’ our right to bear an’ arm;
We vote our founding fathers’ will to protect the weak from harm.
We mainly vote Republican an’ the reason’s good for that:
‘Cause we seldom find our views upheld by any Democrat.

So it’s heroes this, an’ heroes that, them Democrats do say,
But it’s take our votes away now, boys, when we’re off so far away;
When we’re off so far away, my boys, when we’re off so far away,
They’ll keep the troops from countin’ boys, the good ol’ liberal way.

The Democrats do love us, boys, when we’re off a’ fightin’ wars,
But it’s cut our budgets to the bone behind their damned closed doors.
Some even say that we should pay for wounds our service earned;
No wonder they discount us so an’ want our ballots spurned.

Yeah it’s heroes this, an’ heroes that, boys, all the livelong day,
But it’s sue to kill our votes, boys, when we’re servin’ far away,
When we’re servin’ far away, my boys, when we’re servin’ far away,
It’s our precious vote denied us, boys, the Jackass Party’s way.

* The author made a sincere effort to work the feminine gender into this poem and still honor Kipling’s original construct and tenor, a task he found beyond his meager poetic skills. There is no intent to disrespect or dishonor our female troops and their essential role in our nation’s defense.

Category: 2012 election