My city is less gay than yours

| January 10, 2012


Per CNN:

 Salt Lake City, Utah, is known for breathtaking mountain scenery, the Mormon Tabernacle Choir, the 2002 Winter Olympics.

But today it was also named the Gayest City in America by The Advocate magazine.

The Advocate ranked cities according to its own admittedly nonscientific criteria, including the number of gay and lesbian bookstores, elected officials who are lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender, and some edgier metrics like the number of International Mr. Leather competition semifinalists and the presence of nude yoga classes. This year’s list intended to examine cities that are outside the usual orbit of San Francisco, Boston, Miami and New York, and came up with several surprises – Grand Rapids, Michigan, Knoxville, Tennessee. Even Little Rock, Arkansas, ranked 11 out of 15.

 

Um, call me old fashioned, but if I were a gay chap (again, loving Thomas Edward Patrick Brady Jr. is not gay) I would just want to be left the hell alone. Being the home of the “Mr Leather competition semifinalists” wouldn’t really change the equation. And nude yoga strikes me as bad gay. I went to a nudist volleyball tournament outside Albany one time, and it was disgusting. There was fat, more fat, and sand stuck in celulite craters. In the movies it’s always hot broads bouncing. In the real world, hot broads don’t play nude volleyball.

The fact that it wasn’t Hyannisport, Key West and San Fran as the top 3 tells me the advocate doesn’t know how to rank things. Which for some reason reminded me of this scene:

Category: Politics

23 Comments
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ROS

Did I or did I not tell you that Barbie drove a Jeep?

And no, loving TFB is not gay……….if you’re Gisele.

Bobo

Where the hell is Northampton, Massachusetts on that list?

2-17 AirCav

You went to a nude volleyball tourney? Oh jeez, TSO. Please say that you were under 21, drunk, or under 21 and drunk.

2-17 AirCav

Oh. That’s different. Whew! Had me worried there for a second.

Bobo

TSO – If the bar wasn’t filled with hippies and “chicks” with short hair, you must have accidently crossed into Easthampton.

NHSparky

SLC teh ghey? And yeah, TSO–no mention of Provincetown, Ogunquit, West Hollywood, etc?

And for the record, I drive a Jeep. It is neither ghey nor pink.

Finally, man-love is not NORMALLY teh ghey, unless the subject of said man-love affection is the subject of a Brokeback Mountain-esque pictorial in Men’s Health or other metrosexual magazine.

Doc Bailey

And here I can breathe a sigh of relief. California doesn’t have the gayest cities. . . but wait there’s LA SF and Berkeley. . . well fuck I guess my state is pretty fucking gay.

2-17 AirCav

How about a listing of the least gay cities? Points for:

No gay bars, no GLT clubs. No transgender studies offered at the local college. No rainbow or pink triangle bumperstickers. No out-of-the-closet-and-proud-of-it office holders. No Gay Day parades. No women with butch haircuts who walk like apes. No males walking like the lightbulb or gerbil is still in there.

UpNorth

Grand Rapids? I knew that my city would make the list one day. Can anyone guess why I moved 40 miles north to the country?
We called the bar Perversions, not Diversions, when we were called there to referee the slap fights.
An LGBT line dancing scene? I don’t believe there’s enough eye bleach in the world.

CavScoutCoastie

Just before I moved from Atlanta at the end of 98, I noticed someone had bought and was refurbishing the old strip club right near my apartment. (No I never went there when it was open; it was not a high end place). About 2 weeks before I moved, the new place openned. They flew a big rainbow flag and the new name was “Swingin’ Richards”. Got out just in time.

headhuntersix

I would’nt care if Tommy B was running a train with his whole O line…as long as they friggen on Saturday night.

Old Tanker

UpNorth

I want to know how in the hell Saugatuck didn’t make that list…..hey, isn’t that about 40 miles from GR? Oh wait, it’s south!

CavFSO

They’re probably just trying to slander Utah and Mormons after the prop-8 stuff. As I recall, the only tornado to hit Salt Lake in the past 100 years destroyed the only gay bar in town, and that was the only permanently destroyed building.

Teh gayz are probably still pissed about that.

Zero Ponsdorf

2-17AC #10: How about a listing of the least gay cities?

I DO like that idea! The outrage from the PC types would offer up some much needed laughs.

melony

@16 – you can put Atlanta on your list…jussayin…

bullnav

OT – good question: why isn’t Saugatuck on the list?

On the other hand, Ann Arbor is no surprise…

The Dead Man

#15 I might be remembering the Tornado wrong, but the only thing I remember it doing was knocking windows out. Doesn’t surprise me that SLC is on the list, it does surprise me that it’s number one. I have to admit though, MOST of the gay guys out here you wouldn’t guess it unless they tell you, which makes things pretty easygoing at least. Or I’m lucky and haven’t seen the other half, either way.

UtahVet

2-17AC #10: How about a listing of the least gay cities?

I can take a guess at that:
Mobile, Alabama
Forest, Mississippi
Paris, Tennessee
Haughton, Louisiana
Hampton, Georgia
Star Valley, Wyoming
Pocatello, Idaho
Lawrence, Kansas

I’ll bet if you added all eight of those cities up you would still have 0 gays and 0 democrats.

UpNorth

Old Tanker, Saugatuck is a village, at best. Besides, it’s been the vacation getaway for gay people for years. That’s it’s draw, easy off the x-way.
Maybe it’s listed in the 15 best gay get-aways for vacation? The place is deserted from October to April.

UpNorth

bullnav, Ann Arbor got included because they counted a lesbian night club over in Inkster. So, Ann Arbor doesn’t make the top 15, unless we’re counting counties now.
And, thanks for this, “No males walking like the lightbulb or gerbil is still in there”, AirCav. There went my last cup of coffee.

jonp

Hold the f**ing phone..International Mr. Leather Competition??