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I think my vote is clear on this one…
http://valorguardians.com/blog/?p=25801
My vote for douchebag faker of the century is Matthis, that window licker pissed me off to no end
lol it’s between Matthis and the dude taking a naked picture of himself… the one with the star on his hairless chest, not the blue collar. They kind of look alike.
oh my oh my. Who to vote for. . . they all pissed me off when I read about them. So many fond memories of ripping shitbags.
So it’s seperated into 4 catagories right:
Senior NCO: MSG Soup Sandwich all the way. Fucker wore a CIB AND a CMB and had more ribbons than i think it’s physically possible to get, and was dumb enough to try to stroll onto Ft Benning.
Secret Squrel wannabe: gotta be the Chippendales SEAL. I do not have words to express the idiocy behind that one.
GET HELP NOW: Matthis. Although the help i’d give this crack head rapist is the kind where he gets his face introduced to my fist multiple times. He has done more to hurt vets than anyone on this list that I can think of. He has given us all a bad name, and has done his utmost to sew genuine hatred and distrust of soldiers in SCHOOL CHILDREN no less (one wonders how he got access to schools but that’s another diatribe)
General officer: Mcsoulpatch. that uber gay fool, showed up with a set of mess dress that wasn’t even close to correct, and probably tried to score a few numbers with his FABULOUS attire. I can not imagine weaker mae culpas when he said “he was just trying to draw attention to” whatever issue it was. Impersonating a General officer IS a federal offense unless I’m much mistaken.
that’s my vote and why. Now I’ve got to go do pushups before I break something.
(Glad to see B5, RU and Sniper in on this)
My vote is for soup sandwich, especially because of his ridiculous rap sheet.
Seriously though, tan combat boots with dress blues…. wtf.
That’s a whole metric fuckton of douchebaggery right there.
I think its a tie between the Soup Sandwich and the midget in his mom’s back yard. Both reached levels of douchedom that I have never seen before.
My vote is for Mickey the “Navy SEAL, Silver Star, Two Bronze Stars w V, Purple Heart” Lloyd. As the public safety director in Cobb County Ga d … he fired the whole police recruit class for… CHEATING! He still claims he has all of these awards and is proud of his “service.” Still no proof of anything! A delusional sociopath to the max!
It’s hard to choose between the front runners who have tried to gain something tangible from their posing versus those that just have the unmitigated audacity to turn an honorable uniform into a Cirque du Soleil costume.
CI- A 32 way tie? That’s my “other” vote!
Ballduster McSoulpatch is the MAN (or maybe half a man).
My .02’s worth; 1-Ballduster (Officer), 2-Soup san (SNCO)mostly because he exhibited the balls to stroll right on to Benning and play ‘cock of the walk’. Then, um…..3-Mista Harris mostly because not only did he end up with pretty much the entire 75th Regiment after his ass, he pissed off the wives and his own wife too. lmao! 4- Has to be the fat “secret squirrel MP” that Gizmo ran across at the gun show up in Alaska. By the way, Gizmo’s adventure was finally published in Army Times last month I think?
You are correct Doc Bailey. It is a federal offense to impersonate a general officer of the US Military.
Oliver “Wide Load” Karl, actual name “Oliver Derrick”, my personal kicking toy; is still polluting my inbox, unable to provide the most basic info on his service, (of course, because he has no service), even this morning.
I am convinced that he is a case of full-blown “shit for brains”, batshit crazy.
With each reply to him, I ask him to provide, the date and location of his (1)Ranger School, (2) BUD/S School, (3) posts that he served at, (4) his rank at discharge.
Someone commented at this or one of the posts here that they wondered if there are more phonies now than in the past. I think that the internet has caused more to be visible, because, (a) they use the internet to be someone other than who they really are, and, (b) the internet gives us the tools to be able to see the BS.
@ 14 – Roger that Frankie! Sometimes a lot more than we care to see too, huh? LOL!
I must say that the nominees are all deserving of the award and I do not envy the selection committee’s task. Some stand out because of the outlandish claims they made, others because of that and their bizarre notions of military fashion. But there is one nominee who truly seemed to bring out the best in both creative writing and after-action photoshop skills from our guides: John Kerwin Williams. Here’s the way he was introduced:
“There is no way he is named John, so I prefer to think of him as “4th Lieutenant Assholio Douchenozzle IV”. Anyway, I shouldn’t pick on him because he is STILL deployed with the 101st Chairborne Facebook Commando squadron.”
(Caption) “And, he’s still less literate than a retarded wallaby with tourettes.”
Then there’s the photoshop work. You haven’t seen it or it has been a while, clear the immediate area of liquids and breakable objects, center yourself on your chair, feet flat on the floor, and go here: http://valorguardians.com/blog/?p=25801
Looking at these phonies, and the ones who didn’t make the final cut; I think of sitting out at the Gator Lounge at Camp James E. Rudder,FL, and looking around me. Nearly every single RI there has a Right Shoulder Patch on his ACU’s. If only we could bring the winner and his runner ups out there and put them in the sandbox with a “few of the boys”. I am sure we could divert the AF police while they were shown the error of their ways.
FatBoy SlimShady – the Alaska gunshow dude has my vote.
Here’s a story about another guy faking being a Marine…and a deputy…and conning people out of a lot of money.
http://www.pressdemocrat.com/article/20110923/ARTICLES/110929693/1350?Title=Trail-of-deception-is-unraveling-for-man-accused-of-theft
So many choices, so little time. I’d have to go with the 32 way tie. I do like Frank’s idea in #17, and they all deserve an invite to his party.
My money is still on Matthis, as far as the VFW is concerned, to be considered a Veteran, you must have been in country 30 days, because that’s when you are eligible for the campaign ribbon. That fucking faker (no offense to his Father) is a worthless mouth-breathing piece of feces.
Send them all down range,last one standing wins…just say’in
I say put them in the military as IED-finders.
This contest is like being a judge at a “Purtiest Pig” pageant. I say give the whole bunch a sea cruise on the sun deck of the USS Florida…..at 200 feet.
Ray–no way in hell. I did a patrol on Florida (Blue). Maybe a nice old Russian boat, you know–the ones with no shielding where their officers used to get “sterility pay” (true story).
As an MP I’m going have to vote for William “Dunlap” Clark. Not as many MP posers as there are for the elite forces, so you have to take them when you can find em.
If not for the MP angle then I’d most definitely have to go with the Lesbian Pirate Regan Adams aka. LTC Warryck Wolf
Ironically they are next to each other in the collage.
I’m in for Soup Sandwich. shows up at Benning and demands to see the CSM about mistreatment of his kid dressed like Rambo Killjoy. close second would be the Harvey Mudd. I mean, really, jodpurs? with a dress coat????
Bubblehead, Sparky, I like your thinking but that’s a bit too Navy. How about we leave it to the various services to deal with their fakers.
I would like to see mor than one of these douches make big rocks into small rocks for a LONG time. Matthis has my personal ire, longtime readers might know why. It’s sad that his father is such an honorable man.
Just out of curiosity how many of these re res are openly gay (and using their “service” to promote more gayness?)
FO, you get your ranger buddies together and we can all have a grand old time.
Sparky,
I did say the sun deck… As in outside the people tank. I doubt any of these massingale nozzles can hold their breath for a whole patrol. LOL (but I like your “evil Nuke” thinking!)
Doc,
OK… We get all the Sealwannabes.
Ray…stick em all in Missile tubes 1 & 2. Head down to test depth. Override the missile comp interlock, flood and equalize, and pop the hatches.
Anyone still left gets to do it again just to make sure the first time wasn’t a fluke.
Love it. They could always ride a water slug at TD too. :oD
the really sad thing is I actually know what you two are talking about.