I’m here all week- tip the Vending Machines!
20% is customary
Poetrooper sends us the latest chapter in our brave new world.
Self-checkout machines now ask for tips in latest squeeze on customers
Consumers are now requested to leave tips at self-checkout machines at some airports, bakeries, coffee shops and stadiums across the US
Emily Robertson
Consumers already contending with a squeeze on their bank accounts due to inflation are now facing more pressure as businesses introduce new tipping features at self-checkout machines.
Companies, including airports, bakeries, coffee shops and sports stadiums, have now introduced the self-serve tipping option, where customers can leave tips including the typical 20%, despite facing minimal to no interaction with any employee, according to a recent report by The Wall Street Journal.
This is nothing more than a tax on compliant sheeple who never learned how to say ‘No’ and these days? Not a bad play. Not bad at all.
Heh. Thanks, Poe.
Apologies to Aldous Huxley.
Category: America, Dumbass Bullshit, Guest Link, Points-and-Laughs
If it’s a self-checkout, shouldn’t I get the tip?
It’s like IPPS-A… you have to do everything yourself, but HR dorks still have a job somehow.
I thought I spoke acronym but you got me. Translation please?
Now you’ve done it. I thought my acronym OCD was in remission, but no.
The Integrated Personnel and Pay System-Army.
Which implies it’ll be inflicted on the other branches as well.
You’ve got it. Self-service personnel and pay access, the wave if the future–employees will manage all their HR and payroll info themselves now.
Well, this is already reality in parts of the civilian sector. I’ve seen a few small and larger companies use a specific “advanced data processing” company go this route. It’s a nightmare to correct a mistake-their mistake. Which isn’t supposed to happen because it is all autonomous. Except for the part where entry-level data clerks are still inputting info into their system. Took 9 months for them to correct, caused me a hassle at tax time. But I’m sure the gubmint will do it properly.
HR is now doing the job they were always intended to do-protect the company. It was never about the employee, just an accountability buffer between management and workers.
Come on…you’re old enough to know by now; they ALWAYS promise “only the tip”.
These are the same folks who wear a mask…alone in their car.
If the vending/self-check machine has nice mammary glands then maybe…
don’t mind paying for, um, inflation but this has gotten out of control.
Well, you can fantasize about big hoobas while you “self-checkout” if you want to.
Babylon Bee response in 4…3…2…
They’re requesting you tip them for you doing a good job?
And for courteous service. That is in no way guaranteed anymore. Also you know he didn’t spit on your food. Someone else might have, but not the bot.
A can of expanding foam is a better tip.
I picked up a pizza last night for the first time in a year. The guy that handed me my pizza was asking for tips on the CC scanner. I had no problems pushing zero.
In a pic:
Yeah, Vets aren’t the target demographic for this.
Pretty much my attitude about everything since I hit 65.
Pretty much what I look like, too.
If a machine/robot asked me for a tip, I would tell the machine/robot to not bet on me on the 5th at Belmont. Why does a machine need a tip unless the tip moola shmoola is going into a human bean that works there.
If someone or something is dumb enough to ask me for a tip, I’ll just tell them to NEVER eat at a cheap oriental restaurant next to a dog pound!
They’re doing this backwards. If it’s self-service, you should get a discount because there’s no payroll overhead. The only tip a machine will get from me is tipped over.
I thought that’s where he was going with this, in the first place.
The only tip a machine will get from me is tipped over.
I don’t usually tip myself after pumping my own gas, I suspect it’s thus somewhat unlikely I’m tipping a kiosk for buying stuff in the kiosk that I have to select myself and serve myself….
I’m aware that our new robot overlords might not view this favorably, but I don’t give a shit.
I’ve been known to tip myself after pumping my gas
The same people that their car tells them that the door is a jar, when they know it’s only a door, will leave a nice tip for the Skynet Sweet Voice.
I see most of these at places like liquor stores and such where someone sells you the booze (limited human interaction) and the tip request pops up when you insert your card to pay.
Once you have the human interaction, you look like a loser for not tagging an additional 15%.
But w/ no human interaction, hell no.
Unless the liquor clerk went and got me my booze, he ain’t getting a tip. Same thing if I go pickup a pizza at Domino’s. No delivery, no tip.
Or at a fast food joint. As mentioned above, this is for the sheeple that are incapable of critical thinking. That “0” button is gonna get worn out..
Fast food goes without saying. If I go pick a breakfast sandwich at Panera, I get the “Add Tip” screen to which I put 0%. Tip on a to-go order AND I gotta poor my own coffee? Fuck that.
We used to tip the cigarette machines upsidedown to get any
coin change but also got a few packs as a tip.
Mostly Lucky’s……..
Seems like Mr. Pink from the movie “Reservoir Dogs” was spot on about tipping.
Next thing you know they’ll want your clothes, your boots and your motorcycle 😬
Go ahead and call me a collaborator but if Kristanna Loken tells me to take off my clothes and boots I’m in. I’d probably even let her ride on my motorcycle.
I gots something she can ride…and it ain’t no moto sickle.
T.I.P.S. T(o) I(nsure) P(rompt) S(ervice). Also used for P(roper)
A few years back, a waitress (yes, I know that’s sexist) was wearing a T.I.P.S. button. AFTER finishing breakfast, I pointed out that her button was wrong. Tips do not ensure prompt service, prompt service insures tips, that’s why tipping is done after the service. She was tipped generously but was still pretty pissed off. I enjoyed it more than I should’ve.
Yep…T.I.P.S, like the TAH Friday Weekend Open Thread FIRST, are EARNED NEVER AWARDED.
So, you gave her a Tip, before givig her a Tip when you REALLY wanted to give her a Tip, after the Tip and she was STILL pissed off…..unh huh… 🙎
As long as she does that self enhancement thing
En Espanol, but don’t mind that…
Dang…
Why was that age restricted?
Honestly, you can get full on X stuff without any hassle.
18 seconds I’ll never get back and now yt thinks I’m a perv. Thanks.
Here it is:
It’s YouTube… somebody might get “offended” (oh, no!) or something. /sarc
A machine asks for a tip?
Time to use cash only, so they can’t trace back your CC plastic and break into your account.
We are transitioning to a cashless society It is for your health and safety. Report to the processing center to receive your microchip
Suuuuure. And then I’ll plug in and power up my de-Gausser coil (remember those?).
That should fix any microchip.
I wonder how hard it’d be to take a 1,200 watt microwave emitter from a kitchen range, hook it up to a car battery and transformer, then aim it at people’s junk/hand area to pop the ‘mark of the beast’ handchips, maybe even sterilize the sheeple in the process…. in Minecraft.
Just thought of another one:
A reloadable gift card, not connected to your main account..
So even if The Machine gets upset over no tip, and is able to hack your CC plastic, there’s only the small amount that you’ve loaded.
Indianapolis convention center has just such a machine, put in your cash get a loaded debit card. None of the food vendors in the place take cash, only cards.
What did the leper say to the Hooker?
Keep the tip.
THANK YOU, don’t forget to tip the veal and try the Waitress!!!
Tip the veal? Is that like the midget wrestling of cow tipping?
That made me calf so hard I nearly barfed a lung.
No bull?
Cowabunga man!
Not to roast you, but let’s steer this conversation to something more productive, don’t need you up-chuck-ing up a lung.
Steak your claim, and we’ll move on to greener pastures.
I’m glad we cud moove on without locking horns in some kinda beef.
Ok, different topic,,,? Um… Ok, what’s your favorite kind of cheese?
@Roh-Dog
Cheese.
Let’s not get started on Heavy Chevy’s
dietdairy proclivities.
DEAL!
That was actually quite fun.
Hopefully Jeff will give us a Grade A on how well we milked the subject.
BOOOOO! You bleu the chance to stop! Teleme, why you have to string me along in this misadventure? I’m smoked and sapasgo to bed.
So feta up with this…
I’m nacho friend no more.
If I’m at the self-service checkout and receive exceptional service, wouldn’t I want to tip generously?
I’m conflicted about this.
Next, the IRS will want a tip for processing your refund. We’ll live in fear of a retaliatory audit if we don’t.
Did you say IRS?
😉😎
“IRS Removes Investigative Team From Hunter Biden Probe In Move That Whistleblower Claims Is ‘Clearly Retaliatory”
https://nypost.com/2023/05/15/irs-cans-investigative-team-from-hunter-biden-probe-in-move-whistleblower-claims-is-clearly-retaliatory/
“The purge allegedly was done on the orders of the Justice Department, the whistleblower’s attorneys informed congressional leaders in a letter.”
“Hunter, 53, is under investigation for not paying taxes on millions in largely foreign-sourced income.”
speaking of coffee shops… (Almost sure this was covered on SPotW or some such, google powered search is clearly running Y2K software from that woman-owned business I reckon. too lazy to dig)
Found where (where else?) I’d read this moronic tale:
From ZH (link):
So… he aimed for the bottom and struck it thusly.
Pity.
A victim of his own moral superiority. 🤔
Shorter version, he failed and it’s all YOUR fault!
🤣
IT JUST NEEDS to be done one more time!!!
Please forgive my ignorance, but exactly how do you expect to run a successful business without embracing capitalism? Granted, my formal economics education didn’t get past ECON 101 (Professor Durtschi was a rockstar), but somehow this ven ture seemed doomed to fail. And it did. I wonder how much state, federal, and local financial aid he pocketed.
MMMMmmmmm, Schadenfreude…