USAR Maj make porn to fuel his congressional campaign

| October 18, 2022

He did it as a “conversation piece.” I think he might have found a way to legitimately use campaign donations to doink a porn star. If he does expense this, then he might be the most brilliant field grade officer of his generation. In either case, I expect the Army Reserve to look down on his activities.

Military Times has the scoop;

An Army reserve officer told New York media this week that he deliberately released a pornographic film as part of his congressional campaign.

Maj. Mike Itkis, who is running as an independent against Democratic incumbent Rep. Jerry Nadler for New York’s 12th Congressional District, posted a 13-minute video of himself having sex with adult film star Nicole Sage.

The self-proclaimed “sex-positive” soldier has served in the Army Reserve since 2009. He is currently assigned to the 335th Theater Signal Command out of Joint Base McGuire-Dix Lakehurst in New Jersey, according to records obtained by Army Times.

According to his campaign site, Itkis is running on a platform that includes decriminalizing sex work and ending adultery laws.

Itkis told the City & State that the film was “a conversation piece.”

“If I would just talk about it, it wouldn’t demonstrate my commitment to the issue,” Itkis told City & State. “And the fact I actually did it was a huge learning experience, and it actually influenced items on my platform.”

At the time of this writing, Itkis has not yet responded to a request for comment. The Army Reserve, however, is aware of the situation and looking into it, though as long as Itkis was not on orders when the film was made, he’s probably in the clear.

It is difficult for the Defense Department to punish part-time troops for off-duty conduct.

“The Army Reserve is aware of the allegations and is conducting an investigation,” Army Reserve spokesman Lt. Col. Addie Leonhardt told Army Times.

 

Category: 2022 Elections, Army, Dick Stepping, National Guard, Veterans in politics

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President Elect Toxic Deplorable Racist SAH Neande

Itkis is a bupkis.

What did Ms Itkis have to say? Is it printable?

AW1 Rod

“Conversation piece,” eh? No pun intended, I’m sure.

Vote for GoNadler (blood type = gravy), or vote for this assclown. Not much of a choice, but we’re talking about New York, after all.

Mick

Well, it goes without saying that the next drill weekend at the 335th Theater Signal Command is undoubtedly going to be a real barrel of laughs.

What does our elite team of TAH Sea Lawyers/Barracks Lawyers have to say about this stunt? UCMJ violation(s)?

Anonymous

If he does it on his own time, performs activities legal in his state (many of who’s restrictions were struck down by SCOTUs ruling anyway) and doesn’t call attention to being Army Reserve, he should be fine. (How the former Lt who’d been in my unit could balance her film career and being a drilling reservist later.) But, alas, he has to call attention to this. He in trouble.

Forest Green

Well, it’s a training video after all.

SFC D

Adultery charge? Is the MAJ married? Article 134, conduct prejudicial to good order and discipline?

Anonymous

Bringing discredit upon the armed forces?

SFC D

Douchebaggery?

rgr769

There could be a charge of an officer engaging in un-butt-cumming conduct.

5JC

He went full Idiocracy, Never go full Idiocracy!

Anonymous

Hey, it worked for Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho (although pro wrassling probably had more impact)!

Last edited 2 years ago by Anonymous
AW1 Rod

Brought to you by Carl’s Jr.

Anonymous

A product placement they might not approve again…

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SailorJamie

It’s a bold strategy, Cotton. Let’s see if it pays off for ’em.

SFAlphaGeek

I’m sure it briefed well.

Hack Stone

He is just demonstrating what he will do to/for the taxpayers in his district when he gets to Congress.

Wiz

13 minutes? She probably wasn’t close to finishing one nail in that time frame.

Andy11M

So what was his screen name? Major Wood?

Anonymous

Well, Cap’n Stabbin’ was already taken…

RGR 4-78

WO Wee Willy Winkie.

Forrest Bonduraunt

Wolf Clitzer.

Anonymous

He’s hoping to get a bounce (pun intended) from her out of this.

jeff LPH 3 63-66

Rim shot Bong, couldn’t have done better on that one.

Hack Stone

To keep the Army – Navy rivalry going, Ensign Hunter Biden is about to drop another one of his homemade movies.

Mick

Oh, cum’on man!

(See what I did there?)

Anonymous

Money shot! (Too much?)

Hack Stone

The Big Guy gets 10% of the money shot.

Roh-Dog

Ever notice the half-decent representatives in history tended to keep their philandering out of the public?
Of above or below the table, I’m not saying one action is more moral than the other, just that maybe a case of shame could keep asses in line with rational behavior.

This moron should be shown the door with a big ol’ FU discharge…. on top of the other itchy discharge.

Flagwaver

Wait, he banged a porn star on video and… He’s single, so what’s really the problem with him banging whoever he wants to bang? At least he’s being honest about who he tried (and succeeded) to screw.

5JC

There is a laundry list of problems with porn that have nothing to do with morality. High suicide, drug use, VD rates for starters. Most people don’t want to be associated with that.

11B-Mailclerk

Banging a US porn performer is a no- no, but renting a 16-maybe-year-old debt-slave girl in some third world shithole dive bar is a no- call.

5JC

Only if you are in the Secret Service.

Old tanker

Holy crap he is running against nadler but shows himself to be no better than the current toad in office. I wonder if there is a repub running in the same race.

KoB

When he’s charged, he’ll get off.

Anonymous

Well, already did, but…

Green Thumb

I like this guy.

Out of the box thinking.

Skivvy Stacker

Well, not really “out of the BOX”……

rgr769

Yes, not counting takes, he could have spent up to 13 minutes in the box.

RGR 4-78

Depends on the final “shot”.

JustALurkinAround

If you find yourself in a hole, keep pumping.

JustALurkinAround

And he best have thanked her for her service.

SFC D

Signal Corps leading the way!

RGR 4-78

Burying the telegraph pole?

rgr769

IIRC, wasn’t there a female E-6 in the Army or USMC about ten to fifteen years ago for posing for one of the skin magazines. Didn’t she get the boot? Looks like our Woke military will tolerate anything now except refusing to get an experimental inoculation that could damage your health.

Hack Stone

Way, way back circa 1980 Playboy ran a series of Women In Uniform Out Of Uniform. Representing Hack’s beloved Marine Corps was 22-year-old Marine sergeant named Bambi Lin Finney, who was a teletype technician, which was the MOS of Hack’s brother Rollin Stone, three years later.

https://cdnc.ucr.edu/?a=d&d=DS19800223.2.19&e=——-en–20–1–txt-txIN——–1

5JC

Still on the market Hack if you are interested.

https://www.vox.com/2018/10/15/17952462/duncan-hunter-ammar-campa-najjar-indictment-midterms-2018

And yes, that is her.

ninja

Mikhail Itkis:

https://www.linkedin.com/in/mikhail-itkis-8b7518b

Major
U.S. Army Reserve
Feb 2009 – Present13 years 9 months

New Jersey, United States

Cyber Operations Officer (17A), Russian Linguist, Signal Officer (25A), Civil Affairs Specialist (38B)

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ninja

Is he wearing Air Defense?

rgr769

Yes, that is the branch insignia for Air Defense Artillery. One wonders how he could be ADA with those officer MOS’s. Seems like he should be branched Signal Corps or Civil Affairs. I always thought the ADA insignia made no sense: Crossed muzzle loading Civil War cannons (twelve pounder Napoleons) with an AD missile through their center.

KoB

Could be ’cause the FIRST (ht 2 Chip) ADA was Cornfederate Damned Insurrectionists Johnny Rebs firing 12 pounder Napoleons at Professor Lowe’s Balloon Corps.

Anonymous

Affirmative, it’s a flying Nike Ajax sans its main booster on there (or, at least, that’s what folk claimed ’cause it looks more like a Chapparal).

Last edited 2 years ago by Anonymous
rgr769

I think it is a Nike cuz the insignia was created long before the Chapparal. The Nike became operational in 1954. I think the branch insignia is from the mid-fifties. The Chapparal became operational in the latter 1960’s.

5JC

On the ADA insignia It’s a Nike Missile, You can tell by the fins top and bottom. There were fins in the middle as well but they are covered.

But that isn’t ADA insignia.

5JC

Looks like Cyberwarfare to me. Crossed lightning bolts with a sword throught middle.

That is actually his branch so that makes worlds more sense.

rgr769

Welp, I learned something new, thanks to you. The Cyber Corps is now an officer branch. And I think you are right, and he is wearing its branch insignia. Although, Wikipedia shows the branch colors as black with a silver or gray border.

rgr769

Correction: The rank shoulder boards/straps for Cyber Corps officers are steel gray with narrow black borders surrounded by the standard gold outer border. So, the ADA stuff is irrelevant.

5JC

Not only is it a branch, it is considered a “combat arms” branch. My son serves in it. He is a good kid… Man? But he is pretty far from the sound of the guns.

To join you have to take a series of tests that prove proficiency in several programming languages and have a near max ASVAB. It’s a six year initial commitment and they spend nearly 18 months in training prior to reporting to their first unit. Clearance is max as well.

It’s tough competition to get in and retention is terrible because the guys can literally walk right into a cyber security job making six figures from an E4 slot with the training and clearance. Not sure about the officer side. He loves it though, the whole branch is computer nerds.

rgr769

Wow. So, when deployed soldiers sitting at a computer screen in an air-conditioned building can receive combat pay. What’s next a Combat Cyberwarfare badge?

MustangCPT

You read my mind, Ranger. It’s going to have a wreath surrounding a laptop computer.

5JC

No hazardous duty pay. Not until they designate Ft. Gordon or Ft. Meade a combat zone.

They can sure break things and kill people without leaving their laptop anyway.

Anonymous

(Sure looks like ADA in low-res w/ squinting though… )
comment image

Last edited 2 years ago by Anonymous
MustangCPT

Mug-fugger looks like Ernst Stavro Blofeld.

ninja

According to this, he was born in Ukraine in 1969 and moved to NYC in 1979.

Article states he is a “Retired Major in the Army Reserves.”

Received his B.S. in 1991. Based on birth year, graduated from High School in 1987, followed by a 4 year degree.

IF he was Commissioned in 1991, then there is a possibility of 20 years in 2021.

https://www.the-sun.com/news/6451138/who-is-mike-itkis/

ninja

This states he began serving in the Army Reserves in 2009:

https://ballotpedia.org/Mikhail_Itkis

Anonymous

How’d he jack up making LTC, not getting PME done?

Last edited 2 years ago by Anonymous
5JC

Yeah um no, he was enlisted as a 38B and then likely got commissioned when he graduated college. That would give him 16 years of commissioned service. If he retired at 20 he would be too short to make LTC.

Anonymous

Ah, I see. (Because his not being able to go online to get his sh*t done as… well… he was always online doing sh*t… would’ve been too much.)

ninja

😆😅🤣😂

“The Nadler campaign declined to comment. Itkis’ Republican opponent understood it. “You gotta do what you gotta do,” ​​Mike Zumbluskas told City & State. “The media ignores everybody that’s not a Democrat in the city.”

https://www.cityandstateny.com/politics/2022/10/manhattan-congressional-candidate-publishes-porn-video-highlight-his-sex-positive-platform/378456/

Skivvy Stacker

Just giving us a visual representation of what he plans to do to his constituency.

Anonymous

An honest politician…

Hack Stone

You’re stealing Hack Stone’s material. He posted a similar comment 11 hours ago. You can expect to be served with papers from the law office of Bernath & Associates any minute now.

MustangCPT

You mean…
Bernath & Wittgenfeld, Attorneys at Flaw.

Green Thumb

Or Lori Benton et al.

Skivvy Stacker

That’s why I shot Bernath’s plane down.

MustangCPT

🤣😅😂🧉🧉🧉

SFC D

But did he dork the squeakhole?

Anonymous

Most likely… and brag about it, too.

Last edited 2 years ago by Anonymous
Martinjmpr

The Duffel Blog version of this was way funnier.

Sorry, can only give this one 1/5 stars. Would not recommend.

5JC

Ok, guys, I’m going in. Wish me luck.

5JC

That is five minutes of my life I will never get back. Next year’s Oscar is probably a lock though. It gives “This ain’t Hell but you can see it from here” a whole new meaning.

Quote of the film:

“What’s that? So small? You think you can make me happy with that?” – A humble but proud female, minority vendor of Redhat software.

Last edited 2 years ago by 5JC
Green Thumb

Sounds more like the False Commander “Phony” Phil Monkress (CEO of All-Points Logistics).

Jay

Well: he’s a dem AND a field grade officer. Nothing will happens and money will be wasted “investigating.”

And the band played on.