Mark Steffener – Phony SEAL

| May 24, 2019 | 74 Comments

The folks at Military Phony send us their work on Mark Edwin Steffener.  Steffener lives in Seminole, Florida and is 57 years old as of May 2019.

Steffener was a Navy Seabee – and continued in the Navy Reserve after he completed almost 9 years of active duty.

It was while he was in the Navy Reserve that he was called to active duty and sent to Iraq with his Seabee unit. In a span of just a few days in late April – early May 2004, seven men from Steffner’s unit were Killed in Action.

Mark Steffener was wounded around this same time period and was awarded a Purple Heart on June 2, 2004.

His command held a ceremony for the seven men killed and Steffener spoke at the ceremony.  In the writeup, he was introduced as being a SEAL.

The ceremony included the playing of the national anthem followed by an invocation by LCDR Lulrick Balzora, Chaplain of NMCB 14; Commanding Officer, CDR John Prien; Command Master Chief (SCW), Kevin Trost; Chief Construction Mechanic (SCW) Benjamin Slaughter; Construction Mechanic 1st Class (SEAL) Mark Steffner all spoke of their fallen comrades. The 21 gun salute, taps and the final good byes finalized the memorial commemorating the lives of FOURTEEN’s fallen brothers.

SOURCE: https://www.public.navy.mil/seabee/nmcb14/Pages/history.aspx?fbclid=IwAR1CWGz29QNgEcwAG7oXdWKJa3176yOr1fSfSvvSAoE1LzSabzsNBInUb1U

An official U.S. Navy photo captured Steffener as he rendered a salute to the Battlefield Cross.

040515-N-2219H-071
Iraq (May 15, 2004) – U.S. Navy Seabee, Construction Mechanic 1st Class Mark Steffner pays his final respects with a salute to his seven fallen shipmates at a memorial ceremony in Iraq. Naval Mobile Construction Battalion One Four (NMCB-14) lost seven members of its battalion in two separate encounters with Anti-Coalition Forces in Iraq within a 72-hour period. NMCB-14 is a Naval Reserve Seabee Battalion headquartered in Jacksonville, Fla. U.S. Navy photo by Ens. Tony Hollobaugh (RELEASED)

SOURCE: https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:US_Navy_040515-N-2219H-071_U.S._Navy_Seabee,_Construction_Mechanic_1st_Class_Mark_Steffner_pays_his_final_respects_with_a_salute_to_his_seven_fallen_shipmates_at_a_memorial_ceremony_in_Iraq.jpg

They spelled his name wrong – it should be ‘STEFFENER’ vs. ‘STEFFNER’ and you can see it is spelled correctly on his nametag, as well as see the Navy SEAL Trident on his uniform.

CM1 Mark Steffener – Hand Salute

Steffener went into the Army National Guard after leaving the Navy.

It was determined that Steffener was not on the BUD/S-SEAL database so his official military records were ordered through the Department of the Navy.

Steffener has an impressive military record.  He was a diver and qualified in underwater construction.  He was awarded a Purple Heart.

He was assigned in a support role to SEAL Team Six, but he did not go to BUD/S and did not qualify as a SEAL.

Not sure how this got by admin clerks, yeomen or personnelmen, but that U.S. Navy photo is inaccurate since Steffener is wearing an unauthorized SEAL Trident.

The U.S. Navy Office of Information (CHINFO) has been notified about the photo and we expect it to be pulled soon.  https://www.navy.mil/local/chinfo/

It’s a shame, too.  It is a symbolic photo and a tribute to the men that lost their lives in Iraq, but perhaps Steffener should have thought about this before stitching it on his uniform.

Category: Fake SEAL, Navy Poser, Phony SEAL

Comments (74)

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  1. Comm Center Rat says:

    No Memorial Day weekend would be complete without a Fake SEAL outing. Seabee Steffener earned a CAR, PH, NMCM with “V”, and the coveted NDSM. He was even a Diver Second Class and once briefly supported SEAL Team 6. Can’t believe he was never called out for wearing a Trident he didn’t earn. After his impressive Navy career Steffener turned to crime. Him and the skunk are soul mates – both of them emit a most foul and noxious odor.

    • NECCSEABEECPO says:

      This jack Ass had some of the first best nine years any Seabee would ever have and shit all over it. He went to an Amphib, some of the most desired duty for a Seabee, then NMCB and then a Tour with the first and only SEAL team six, that is a dream for all Seabees. After that dive school and UCT no easy task, he had enough right there to be on top of Seabee world. The jack ass got out and for some reason wanted to be the talk of his Reserve Battalion. You guy’s can probably find a lot of Phonies inside Reserve Seabee Battalion. The Battalion is speared all over sometimes within two or three states for one 500 plus Battalion. The reserve units have Dets some from 10 to sometimes up to 50, so if he was on a small Det, that’s how he got away with it, built their trust and went from there. What POS, HAD ONE OF THE BEST SEABEE CAREERS YOU CAN HAVE A PISSED ALL OVER IT.

      The RED Flag should have been NO Seabee Combat Warfare, that’s why he never made Chief, someone should have caught that. What a POS,I know some real SEAL’s that crossed over from the Bees that would love to have a chat withy this E-6 faker.

  2. 5th/77th FA says:

    The stench that Mark Steffener placed all over his service is worse than the smell of any skunk. I feel sorry for the skunk. Maybe the ASPCA can rescue the skunk. No one can save the POS Meal Team 6 supporter Mark Steffener from his upcoming Google Fame.

    Embellishing Asshole! Florida….AGAIN…sigh

  3. Daisy Cutter says:

    From what I’ve seen, Seabees are a tight and proud group. They don’t like it when one of their own gets out of line and brings about any discredit.

    • NECCSEABEECPO says:

      We will have his ass. Bet money he belongs to what we call a Seabee Island’s and he will be exiled.

      I have a question for you guys, cant we turn him into JAG, because he is still in GUARD and is retired waiting for his pension, they can at least take that.

      • Daisy Cutter says:

        I would think so. Still can be held accountable by the USN.

        There is the question in my mind of his using the SEAL claim to advance. There is a checkbox on advancement exams where you get preference if a SEAL – or used to be if you were working in a billet outside your rate. That may have changed with the SO rate.

        • NECCSEABEECPO says:

          I don’t think it was ever on his promotion records or evals. The CPO bored would catch that. With his first nine year enlisted he was on fast track for Chief and should have made it in reserves with a CM rate. The reason he didn’t make Chief is he did not earn his SCW Warfare, they would have caught the SEAL thing, so what ever he did, he did it within the reserve command. His Dive pin alone would have gave him an up against his peers.

      • Comm Center Rat says:

        Chief, for what it’s worth, the US Army White Pages list Steffener as a SSG in the Army Reserve and not as Retired. He may have received his “20 Year Letter” but it appears he’s currently a drilling Reservist and not a “Gray Area Retiree.” Hope you and the Seabee community exile Steffener for perpetuity.

        • NECCSEABEECPO says:

          With that then JAG can still go after this guy right?

          • Daisy Cutter says:

            I’ve never known how this works. I don’t think a JAG officer or a District Attorney can take up an investigation on their own or refer one but I could be wrong.

            I think NCIS or the police have to get a complaint, then investigate it, then turn over findings to the attornies.

            So a DA cannot be fair about evaluating the merits of a case if they investigate it. It has to be referred to them.

            Then again, I have not watched that many episodes of “JAG” on TV so maybe I’m wrong.

            When I turned an active duty gent in, I went to the base investigative unit and they took it on… the equivalent of NCIS.

      • 97Bravo says:

        You can at least have Army CID investigate it. In all honesty they will probably do a joint investigation with NCIS or turn it over to them completely. Sometimes the IG will do these types of investigations as well and then his current Army command can act on it. It’s a little more difficult since he is guard now but there is a law that states he can be recalled to active duty to stand trial at a court martial (if it would even go that far). More than likely he would just be charged with unauthorized wear of an award or badge and be handed punitive actions by his current National Guard Commander. In these situations it really depends on the person, their record and the command group and how much they like the person. I’ve seen O-4s and O-5s do the same or worse and get off with a simple letter of reprimand.

    • HMCS(FMF) ret says:

      MARK “NOT A SEAL” STEFFENER done FUCKED UP… and the BEES are gonna hammer the dog shit out of him for it!

  4. Keepin' It Real says:

    It appears that he fell between the cracks and took advantage of the ambiguity.

    He did some non-BUDS/non-SEAL training in Coronado and was attached with SEAL Team Six in a support role. Probably looked legit to most admin-types.

    Crack – just say ‘NO.’

    • NECCSEABEECPO says:

      Probably correct to a Reserve PN, could have looked like that. Active would catch the AMPHIB part. The thing is he had all the cool shit, legit Dive pin, was on a UCT, AMPHIB, Battalion all of that so yeah that young PN3 or PN2 bought the lie and went ran with it.

      In 2000, we had a real deal check into my old Battalion, was checking out the day he checked in. He was a new Ensign, went from enlisted SEAL to Supply Corps Officer, form old Seaman to Admiral program. The day he checked in the Command Master Chief wanted to meet with him and made some phone calls to find out why a SEAL was checking in as a Supply officer. The difference here was the Master Chief was a thirty year straight Active Seabee and had been there done that. Not knocking reserves but they have a hard time doing things like that, checking.

      The Master Chief even mad him earn the Officer Seabee Combat Warfare pin, and told him he had to wear it on top, meaning he had a choice Trident or the jump wings, he went with Jump Wings. The day he checked out left the gold SCW device on the QD with a nice note to the CMC.

  5. Mustang Major says:

    Seminole, Florida? That wonderful city is in Pinellas County. A simple search of the Pinellas County Clerk of Courts website case records shows a long history of Mark Steffener’s relationship with local law enforcement.

    Just wondering how this clown could have stayed in the local reserves without his various offenses becoming an issue?

    • SSG Kane says:

      As an Army Reserve Detachment Sergeant, I can take a swag at answering “how this clown could have stayed in the local reserves without his various offenses becoming an issue”.

      Looking over his record it looks like 01/25/1994 was a particularly bad day for him.

      If I were his front line leader, he’d get counseled, likely have mandated anger management, and sit down with our command staff. Given it was the 1990’s and alcohol was likely involved, we’d take a look at his service record to that point and decide he was worth keeping.

      From 3/97 to 1/08 its all traffic violations. Honestly, if he doesn’t tell me, I’m not going to know. And looking at those, my counseling would be “Slow the fuck down when cops are present”, largely because at this point (on paper) he’s a fine sailor.

      But lets say my hinkometer is going nuts and I can tell this guy is a bad dude, even if I went to command saying “My gut says this guy is no good” they aren’t going to process him out for traffic violations. Its too much paperwork and not enough time to do it.

    • HMCS(FMF) ret says:

      So he knows the guys at the BTJT Deli? Probably on an “intimate, up close and personal” level…

  6. Wilted Willy says:

    Why is it always Florida? I hope this pos is taken out and flogged! I hope a real SEAL finds him and beats the living dog shit out of him! Funny he is matched up with a skunk, some how seems very fitting? I do feel very sorry for the poor skunk, I don’t think he will ever forget the smell of this fucking poser! Enjoy your new found Google fame you ass Snifter!!

  7. Mustang Major says:

    I may be wrong, but Steffener may have put Florida in first position for 2019’s fake SEAL count.

  8. 26Limabeans says:

    Not a fan of Skunks but the little critter doesn’t deserve to be humiliated like that.
    At least give him the same courtesy we afford dogs and girlfriends.

    • RGR 4-78 says:

      Well, we have had a “bunny fluffer”, I guess now we have a “skunk fluffer”.

      Dave missed his chance, he should have blurred out the face on the poor skunk.

  9. Ex-PH2 says:

    Pity the poor skunk. That is all.

  10. AnotherPat says:

    Mustang Major commented:

    “A simple search of the Pinellas County Clerk of Courts website case records shows a long history of Mark Steffener’s relationship with local law enforcement….Just wondering how this clown could have stayed in the local reserves without his various offenses becoming an issue?”

    Was wondering the same thing as to how he was able to stay in the Army Reserves let alone join the Reserves based on numerous Traffic Infractions as well as being charged with Felonies and Misdemenors while living in Clearwater, Florida.

    Some of the charges included Burgulary, Child Abuse, Spouse Battery, Battery to a LEO…his latest charge in 2015 involved road rage.

    Charges goes back to the 1990s to present day. Looks as if he has some anger management issues. He can’t used the PTSD excuse for charges that occurred before his 2004 deployment.

    If anyone is interested, here is the site to research and review his criminal records. Click “All Case Records Search”. One can also read the documents annotated in blue for each charge:

    https://ccmspa.pinellascounty.org/PublicAccess/default.aspx

    Courtesy of Military Phonies. Here is his 2015 Mugshot:

    https://www.rapsheets.org/florida/clearwater-jail/STEFFENER_MARK/1663003

    Guy definitely has some hiccups of the brain, especially with the embellishment.

  11. Eden says:

    Dear God, we have evidently hit the mother lode of SEAL posers.

  12. Florida again. better late than never that a phony Seal popped up this Friday at the TAH starting gate. I’m glad that I had that nifty genuine boss under the kitchen sink water purifier reinstalled when I moved down here in 2007. So far, no phony Seals in Palm Beach County so far and everything looks Jake.

  13. Claw says:

    A quick review of the records shows the following for FY19:

    Fake Navy – 24
    Fake Army – 18
    Fake Marine – 10
    Fake USAF/Navy – 1
    Fake Coast Guard – 1

  14. Thunderstixx says:

    This guy is a real asswipe.
    Child abuse, road rage and a host of other fuckery….

  15. A Proud Infidel®™ says:

    Mark Edwin Steffener WAS NEVER a USN SEAL.
    Mark Edwin Steffener DID serve in the Middle East.
    Mark Edwin Steffener was legitimately awarded the Purple Heart.
    Mark Edwin Steffener was arrested by the Pinellas Park Police for Burglary according to records found online.
    Mark Edwin Steffener attained the Pay grade of E6 in the USN.
    Mark Edwin Steffener COMPLETELY and TOTALLY shit all over himself, his name and reputation by LYING about his Military Career.
    Mark Edwin Steffener could have stayed completely truthful about his Military Background and still had a truckload of bragging rights.
    Mark Edwin Steffener’s lies about being a USN SEAL are ten times smellier than skunk spray.
    Mark Edwin Steffener grins like someone that SHOULD NOT be left alone around minors.
    Mark Edwin Steffener LEGITIMATELY attained the title of USN Diver and shit all over it by LYING about being a USN SEAL.
    Mark Edwin Steffener WAS “assigned to SEAL Team Six in a support role, but he never went to BUD/S and never earned the SEAL Trident.” (Credits to Military Phony)
    Mark Edwin Steffener grins like someone who enjoys prowling highway rest areas in search of a date.
    Mark Edwin Steffener should have stayed honest about his Military Career.
    Mark Edwin Steffener is someone I wouldn’t even hire to mop floors and empty trash cans.
    Mark Edwin Steffener is stinking Seminole Florida up worse than a million skunks on a spraying rampage.
    Mark Edwin Steffener was awarded the Combat Action Ribbon according to records found.
    Mark Edwin Steffener lowered himself to less than the status of a fresh dog turd on the sidewalk by lying about his service.
    Mark Edwin Steffener will now be wallowing in Google®™ fame with the LIES about Mark Edwin Steffener’s Military Service being made known and Mark Edwin Steffener will now discover that THE INTERNET IS FOREVER.

    Please relay to all stations
    Commo Check,
    ((((OVER))))

    • Wilted Willy says:

      API,
      Did you mean to say,
      Mark Edwin Steffener WAS NEVER a USN SEAL.
      Mark Edwin Steffener DID serve in the Middle East.
      Mark Edwin Steffener was legitimately awarded the Purple Heart.
      Mark Edwin Steffener was arrested by the Pinellas Park Police for Burglary according to records found online.
      Mark Edwin Steffener attained the Pay grade of E6 in the USN.
      Mark Edwin Steffener COMPLETELY and TOTALLY shit all over himself, his name and reputation by LYING about his Military Career.
      Mark Edwin Steffener could have stayed completely truthful about his Military Background and still had a truckload of bragging rights.
      Mark Edwin Steffener’s lies about being a USN SEAL are ten times smellier than skunk spray.
      Mark Edwin Steffener grins like someone that SHOULD NOT be left alone around minors.
      Mark Edwin Steffener LEGITIMATELY attained the title of USN Diver and shit all over it by LYING about being a USN SEAL.
      Mark Edwin Steffener WAS “assigned to SEAL Team Six in a support role, but he never went to BUD/S and never earned the SEAL Trident.” (Credits to Military Phony)
      Mark Edwin Steffener grins like someone who enjoys prowling highway rest areas in search of a date.
      Mark Edwin Steffener should have stayed honest about his Military Career.
      Mark Edwin Steffener is someone I wouldn’t even hire to mop floors and empty trash cans.
      Mark Edwin Steffener is stinking Seminole Florida up worse than a million skunks on a spraying rampage.
      Mark Edwin Steffener was awarded the Combat Action Ribbon according to records found.
      Mark Edwin Steffener lowered himself to less than the status of a fresh dog turd on the sidewalk by lying about his service.
      Mark Edwin Steffener will now be wallowing in Google®™ fame with the LIES about Mark Edwin Steffener’s Military Service being made known and Mark Edwin Steffener will now discover that THE INTERNET IS FOREVER

      I copy 5 x 5
      Willy
      over and out!

    • Eden says:

      API, I copy:

      Mark Edwin Steffener WAS NEVER a USN SEAL.
      Mark Edwin Steffener DID serve in the Middle East.
      Mark Edwin Steffener was legitimately awarded the Purple Heart.
      Mark Edwin Steffener was arrested by the Pinellas Park Police for Burglary according to records found online.
      Mark Edwin Steffener attained the Pay grade of E6 in the USN.
      Mark Edwin Steffener COMPLETELY and TOTALLY shit all over himself, his name and reputation by LYING about his Military Career.
      Mark Edwin Steffener could have stayed completely truthful about his Military Background and still had a truckload of bragging rights.
      Mark Edwin Steffener’s lies about being a USN SEAL are ten times smellier than skunk spray.
      Mark Edwin Steffener grins like someone that SHOULD NOT be left alone around minors.
      Mark Edwin Steffener LEGITIMATELY attained the title of USN Diver and shit all over it by LYING about being a USN SEAL.
      Mark Edwin Steffener WAS “assigned to SEAL Team Six in a support role, but he never went to BUD/S and never earned the SEAL Trident.” (Credits to Military Phony)
      Mark Edwin Steffener grins like someone who enjoys prowling highway rest areas in search of a date.
      Mark Edwin Steffener should have stayed honest about his Military Career.
      Mark Edwin Steffener is someone I wouldn’t even hire to mop floors and empty trash cans.
      Mark Edwin Steffener is stinking Seminole Florida up worse than a million skunks on a spraying rampage.
      Mark Edwin Steffener was awarded the Combat Action Ribbon according to records found.
      Mark Edwin Steffener lowered himself to less than the status of a fresh dog turd on the sidewalk by lying about his service.
      Mark Edwin Steffener will now be wallowing in Google®™ fame with the LIES about Mark Edwin Steffener’s Military Service being made known and Mark Edwin Steffener will now discover that THE INTERNET IS FOREVER.

      How copy?
      OVER!

    • SFC D says:

      API, D’s Cantina copies:

      Mark Edwin Steffener WAS NEVER a USN SEAL.
      Mark Edwin Steffener DID serve in the Middle East.
      Mark Edwin Steffener was legitimately awarded the Purple Heart.
      Mark Edwin Steffener was arrested by the Pinellas Park Police for Burglary according to records found online.
      Mark Edwin Steffener attained the Pay grade of E6 in the USN.
      Mark Edwin Steffener COMPLETELY and TOTALLY shit all over himself, his name and reputation by LYING about his Military Career.
      Mark Edwin Steffener could have stayed completely truthful about his Military Background and still had a truckload of bragging rights.
      Mark Edwin Steffener’s lies about being a USN SEAL are ten times smellier than skunk spray.
      Mark Edwin Steffener grins like someone that SHOULD NOT be left alone around minors.
      Mark Edwin Steffener LEGITIMATELY attained the title of USN Diver and shit all over it by LYING about being a USN SEAL.
      Mark Edwin Steffener WAS “assigned to SEAL Team Six in a support role, but he never went to BUD/S and never earned the SEAL Trident.” (Credits to Military Phony)
      Mark Edwin Steffener grins like someone who enjoys prowling highway rest areas in search of a date.
      Mark Edwin Steffener should have stayed honest about his Military Career.
      Mark Edwin Steffener is someone I wouldn’t even hire to mop floors and empty trash cans.
      Mark Edwin Steffener is stinking Seminole Florida up worse than a million skunks on a spraying rampage.
      Mark Edwin Steffener was awarded the Combat Action Ribbon according to records found.
      Mark Edwin Steffener lowered himself to less than the status of a fresh dog turd on the sidewalk by lying about his service.
      Mark Edwin Steffener will now be wallowing in Google®™ fame with the LIES about Mark Edwin Steffener’s Military Service being made known and Mark Edwin Steffener will now discover that THE INTERNET IS FOREVER.

      Please relay to all stations
      Commo Check,
      ((((OVER))))

    • Commissioner Wretched says:

      Roger, copy, API. Repeating for clarity.

      Did you know …

      Mark Edwin Steffener WAS NEVER a USN SEAL.
      Mark Edwin Steffener DID serve in the Middle East.
      Mark Edwin Steffener was legitimately awarded the Purple Heart.
      Mark Edwin Steffener was arrested by the Pinellas Park Police for Burglary according to records found online.
      Mark Edwin Steffener attained the Pay grade of E6 in the USN.
      Mark Edwin Steffener COMPLETELY and TOTALLY shit all over himself, his name and reputation by LYING about his Military Career.
      Mark Edwin Steffener could have stayed completely truthful about his Military Background and still had a truckload of bragging rights.
      Mark Edwin Steffener’s lies about being a USN SEAL are ten times smellier than skunk spray.
      Mark Edwin Steffener grins like someone that SHOULD NOT be left alone around minors.
      Mark Edwin Steffener LEGITIMATELY attained the title of USN Diver and shit all over it by LYING about being a USN SEAL.
      Mark Edwin Steffener WAS “assigned to SEAL Team Six in a support role, but he never went to BUD/S and never earned the SEAL Trident.” (Credits to Military Phony)
      Mark Edwin Steffener grins like someone who enjoys prowling highway rest areas in search of a date.
      Mark Edwin Steffener should have stayed honest about his Military Career.
      Mark Edwin Steffener is someone I wouldn’t even hire to mop floors and empty trash cans.
      Mark Edwin Steffener is stinking Seminole Florida up worse than a million skunks on a spraying rampage.
      Mark Edwin Steffener was awarded the Combat Action Ribbon according to records found.
      Mark Edwin Steffener lowered himself to less than the status of a fresh dog turd on the sidewalk by lying about his service.
      Mark Edwin Steffener will now be wallowing in Google®™ fame with the LIES about Mark Edwin Steffener’s Military Service being made known and Mark Edwin Steffener will now discover that THE INTERNET IS FOREVER.

      Now, you know!

      • A Proud Infidel®™ says:

        GOOD COPY Commissioner Wretched, I COPY:

        Mark Edwin Steffener WAS NEVER a USN SEAL.
        Mark Edwin Steffener DID serve in the Middle East.
        Mark Edwin Steffener was legitimately awarded the Purple Heart.
        Mark Edwin Steffener was arrested by the Pinellas Park Police for Burglary according to records found online.
        Mark Edwin Steffener attained the Pay grade of E6 in the USN.
        Mark Edwin Steffener COMPLETELY and TOTALLY shit all over himself, his name and reputation by LYING about his Military Career.
        Mark Edwin Steffener could have stayed completely truthful about his Military Background and still had a truckload of bragging rights.
        Mark Edwin Steffener’s lies about being a USN SEAL are ten times smellier than skunk spray.
        Mark Edwin Steffener grins like someone that SHOULD NOT be left alone around minors.
        Mark Edwin Steffener LEGITIMATELY attained the title of USN Diver and shit all over it by LYING about being a USN SEAL.
        Mark Edwin Steffener WAS “assigned to SEAL Team Six in a support role, but he never went to BUD/S and never earned the SEAL Trident.” (Credits to Military Phony)
        Mark Edwin Steffener grins like someone who enjoys prowling highway rest areas in search of a date.
        Mark Edwin Steffener should have stayed honest about his Military Career.
        Mark Edwin Steffener is someone I wouldn’t even hire to mop floors and empty trash cans.
        Mark Edwin Steffener is stinking Seminole Florida up worse than a million skunks on a spraying rampage.
        Mark Edwin Steffener was awarded the Combat Action Ribbon according to records found.
        Mark Edwin Steffener lowered himself to less than the status of a fresh dog turd on the sidewalk by lying about his service.
        Mark Edwin Steffener will now be wallowing in Google®™ fame with the LIES about Mark Edwin Steffener’s Military Service being made known and Mark Edwin Steffener will now discover that THE INTERNET IS FOREVER.

        Good Copy,

        ((((OVER))))

    • xyzzy says:

      I copy:

      Mark Edwin Steffener WAS NEVER a USN SEAL.
      Mark Edwin Steffener DID serve in the Middle East.
      Mark Edwin Steffener was legitimately awarded the Purple Heart.
      Mark Edwin Steffener was arrested by the Pinellas Park Police for Burglary according to records found online.
      Mark Edwin Steffener attained the Pay grade of E6 in the USN.
      Mark Edwin Steffener COMPLETELY and TOTALLY shit all over himself, his name and reputation by LYING about his Military Career.
      Mark Edwin Steffener could have stayed completely truthful about his Military Background and still had a truckload of bragging rights.
      Mark Edwin Steffener’s lies about being a USN SEAL are ten times smellier than skunk spray.
      Mark Edwin Steffener grins like someone that SHOULD NOT be left alone around minors.
      Mark Edwin Steffener LEGITIMATELY attained the title of USN Diver and shit all over it by LYING about being a USN SEAL.
      Mark Edwin Steffener WAS “assigned to SEAL Team Six in a support role, but he never went to BUD/S and never earned the SEAL Trident.” (Credits to Military Phony)
      Mark Edwin Steffener grins like someone who enjoys prowling highway rest areas in search of a date.
      Mark Edwin Steffener should have stayed honest about his Military Career.
      Mark Edwin Steffener is someone I wouldn’t even hire to mop floors and empty trash cans.
      Mark Edwin Steffener is stinking Seminole Florida up worse than a million skunks on a spraying rampage.
      Mark Edwin Steffener was awarded the Combat Action Ribbon according to records found.
      Mark Edwin Steffener lowered himself to less than the status of a fresh dog turd on the sidewalk by lying about his service.
      Mark Edwin Steffener will now be wallowing in Google®™ fame with the LIES about Mark Edwin Steffener’s Military Service being made known and Mark Edwin Steffener will now discover that THE INTERNET IS FOREVER.

      Please relay to all stations
      Commo Check,
      ((((OVER))))

  16. A Proud Infidel®™ says:

    I hereby make an Official Motion for Mark Edwin Steffener to receive The official TAH Continent of Insults®™.

    • ChipNASA says:

      OK, we have a request for the Continent of Insults®™ The Hemisphere of Insults®™ from API, do we have a “Second”?

      • 5th/77th FA says:

        SECOND!!!!!!!! We need an AYE! I debated being the FIRST to call for the Hemisphere of Insults and wasn’t sure if he was worth the keyboard ribbon ink.

        Thanks to my Brother A Proud Infidel for being the FIRST to call down the Time on Target bring the dam damn assault!

        • HMCS(FMF) ret says:

          AYE!!! DO IT!!!

          • ChipNASA says:

            Thank you gentlemen for your request and understandable enthusiasm.

            And so it is…probably the second or third deployment, it’s getting some experience, but the The Hemisphere of Insults®™ will not lie, cheat or steal or embellish it’s service record.

            Unlike SkidMark here that is about to feel the pain of his misdeeds and extremely poor choice of behaviors.

            Well Marky Mark, how does it feel to be famous? Huh, you wanted extra attention and now you’ve got it.
            Also, I can’t wait to see if this doesn’t also bounce back in your fucking face and the proper authorities are notified about your behaviors and see if there aren’t any additional repercussions from military investigators.

            YOU DUN FUCKED UP A-A-RON!!

            Annnnnddd AWAY WE GO!!!

            The Hemisphere of Insults®™
            (aka, “This Ain’t Hell” Thesaurus)
            FIRE IN THE HOLE!!!!
            TACTICAL NUCLEAR ROUND OUT!!!!
            THREE PASS AIRCRAFT BOMB RUN!!!!!
            DANGER CLOSE!!!!
            MOPP LEVEL 4!!!
            TAKE COVER!!!!!
            …. Mark (Skid Mark) Edwin (No Win) Steffener (Limp noodle) …HEY DICKLESS WONDER, We all hope you read this and come back here and try to defend your actions, but, you won’t because, YOU’RE A STRAIGHT UP COWARD, NOT a SEAL, vile, flaming piece of skunk shit, ALLEGEDLY, but not confirmed or proven, but in some people’s opinion, works balls, tickles taint and tongue punches hobo’s crusty fart boxes all, I Guess, while being a syphilitic, turd-sucking feces factory, HOLY Baby Ape Shit Breath, Bitch-ass Fuckstick guzzler, pile infested, onion-eyed flapmouthed butt-bailiff, “Fowl” mouthed Chicken Fucking Chickenfucker, You flaccid piece of tofu, Simply a fart in life waiting to be fabreezed away, moral equivalent of pond scum, THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS A WALKING TURD, inflamed, “Towel boy” in a gay bath house, DILLY DILLY!!, Ambulatory verbal dissembling anus, Fucking one cell spermatozoon with a tiny flagella, gaping giant ass walking fungus shit nugget, Bag of seasoned dog shit, Cambodian cunt sauce, he deserves to have his private parts gnawed by angry badgers, Anyone who ever loved you was wrong, bucket of ass chum, Poopy Headed ball working asshole, JERK OFF !!, Soup Sandwich, if you Mom would have known you were going to turn out like this, she’d have prayed for a miscarriage, Diaper-Sniper, you’re such a pussy, when you get a haircut they charge you for a bikini wax, suck a big diseased gorilla dick and open those ass cheeks for the bull elephant that has been eyeing your lying ass, Poster-child for post birth abortion, Testicle face, This twat waffle is dumber than a bucket of goat piss, I pray thou shalt be pursued into the mountains by sex-mad baboons, O thou creature of the pit!, If you are married, The only thing your wife wants for Christmas is a folded flag, Dick Swallowing Jerk Wad Spooge Sampling cum gobbling parasitic infection bunghole tonguer, Klootviool, Dude–even your balls are made of pussy, should be ass raped and tea-bagged, at the same time, by a Rabid Rhinoceros, you were the kid that had to sit alone at lunchtime, you’re the afterbirth that slithered out from your mother’s filth, you have always been picked last, you are a puck shot, catcher’s mitt double dribble field goal miss, you are the trash bag after a barracks/frat house party, the Stanley Cup could be your Mom’s dildo, I wish you were an EOD training power point presentation. Not the cool, highly trained bad ass EOD guys, the recipient, He’s more fucked up than a spotted Zebra, shirt-lifter, This guy stepped on his dick so hard it made mine hurt, when your Mom was pregnant with you, the dry cleaner used to charge her double for extra coat hangers. She had bad aim, If this wasn’t so sad, it would be as funny as watching a monkey try to fuck a football, I’m surprised he didn’t award himself a Purple Heart for stepping on his dick., Anus tonguing shitslurping fuckwitted hemorrhoid munching dick lips wanktoaster, pud-knuckling pus-nuts, farting dive bubble cock gobbling Pigfucker, lientery steatorrhea, sperm burping dickchops, Sloshing bucket of Hippo Diarrhea, short strand DNA ‘tard, a bathroom selfie loser, fake “death stare” makes you look like a semen sucking cum vampire on his way to a flying J truck stop hobo ball sac buffet, Cuntosaurus Rex, Bulbous Bleeding Batrachivorous Butthole Burrito, enjoys being attacked by and being sunk by meat torpedoes,
            Fuck you Fucksicle, This pissant is such a genius of monumental proportions he can skullfuck his own asshole, You man meat munching, spunk bubble blowing butt sponge, You are a disease, worse than a crotch tick, you puerile, one-handed, slack-jawed, drooling, meatslapper, Boy, you couldn’t lead a fresh turd down the bowl, Thinks that he is in the “dark” secret ops, not realizing that he has his head up his ass, You were born stupid and had a prolapse, In need of an appointment with a brass-knuckles Amateur Dentist, exposure to diseased posers is also known as “the Result of Cyclospora” with * “Symptoms of cyclospora include diarrhea and frequent, sometimes explosive bowel movements, according to the CDC.” I say, I say, That boy’s about as sharp as a sack o’ wet mice, Dear fucking 8 pound 6 ounce baby Jesus on a cement tricycle, banjo eyed, insignificant and inconsequentially ignorant imbecilic idiot, single strand DNA refugee from a blow job, not worthy to lick taint lint off my cats backside, Unable to prevail against his one brained celled activity taking him over, so he types, talks, acts as if a retarded ghost possessed him. dickwad that can’t make a good seal on Tupperware, Buttcrackiula, tit, Oh, fuck you sideways with a roll of horse liniment coated concertina wire…you sorry, miserable, posing, shit eating goat fucker, You look like the product of an orgy at a family reunion, got-damn cum drop, You’re funnier than a sock full of frogs and tougher than a jar of marshmallow crème, Sharmouta, hey douche bag, I bet your ass is jealous of the shit that comes out of your mouth, sniveling, codpiece licking toilet seat sniffer, as worthless as a Toyota airbag, lying bucket of Chihuahua shit, taintpimple, Pillow bitin pickle smoocher, meat-gazing walrus fart hamster queef that should have stayed a tittyfuck cumstain in the back seat of an AMC Pacer, Bowl of ass soup, Festering fuckwart on a sewer rat’s ass, I heard you volunteered to go to the Middle East to take on terrorists…dressed as a goat, I believe you to be one of the few, proud pieces of shit that flies won’t fuck on, You’re not the dumbest person on the planet, but you sure better hope he doesn’t die, needle dick bug fucker, wad of fungus on a pile of roach turd, Drongo, Satan even said about you, “Boy is this guy a DICK!, Sparklepony, Toilet weasel, pigshit fungus, grubby little dick-beater, You grotty wanking oik artless base-court apple-john, Connoisseur ,worthless, Vice Admiral of the Narrow Seas, Blows winos behind bus stops for a nickel and gives change, jejeongsin-iya?, whore-hopping fecal wart, Soppspiste Pitbulkukkforhud, stench-ridden, Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; you only gargled, shiftless, monkey-buggerer, petrified shit biscuit, More worthless than rubber lips on a woodpecker or tits on a boar hog, ignoble itching buttcrack, You’re the reason God created Irritable Bowel Syndrome, moldy bowl of ratshit, would wear Richard Simmons’ used jockstrap as a facemask, lickspittle, useless bag of monkey fuck, dickbutt, rectum circling colon goblin, Asshole casserole, Vafanculo, Nut hugger, People like you are the reason God doesn’t talk to us anymore, salad tosser, gonorrheatic urethral cliff diver, smeerlap, fud, rancid floor buffer wax spreader, both of your Grandmothers should have had an abortion, just in case, I’ve seen bigger wieners on a cocktail plate!, You look like something I’d draw with my left hand, Mayor Grundle Butter of Scrotumburg and Anusville, waste of oxygen, Grandstanding cunt, prickwrinkler, Holy cupcake munching monkeys, clitwart, cuntscab, Fuck you, you nutless chickenfuck cocksucking rat-bastard piece of roach shit! Eat a whole fucking ConEx full of dicks!, anal sphincter canyon yodeling phallic squeezer, numbnuts, malodorous odiferous felonious fido fucker, snowball, Coprophagous fop, Gonorrhea breath, swizzle tits, giggling beerflecked canker blossom, how did you survive infancy, rectal rapee, GonnoSyphaHerpaClapAIDS Patient Zero monkey buggerer, ball-tickling & ball gargling bullshiat artist, R2-Dildo, You suck dick for beer money and you don’t even drink beer, secret squirrel masturbation specialist, hand in your badge, Adolf, you fart repeatedly just to make yourself smell better, spunk-trumpet, Bakrauf,

            • ChipNASA says:

              face down ass up weak kneed pillow biter, maybe this hero could strap a suicide vest to himself, go out in the open desert and make people confetti out of himself, Wait, of all the lucky sperms that came outta your daddy, you’re the one that WON??, He’s so much of a dickhead he takes Viagra thru a nasal spray, and he’s still limp, How I the fuck do assholes like this sleep at night? With one hand on their tiny dick and the other thumb in their ass, Holy shit, maybe a “buggerer of little boys”, rottencrotched, rump wrangling, colostomy bag curator, A butter knife amongst razor blades, Rusty Trombone Virtuoso, he is the kinda guy who likes meeting up with two strange men so they can sword fight in his mouth, he’s the kind of guy you’d find hanging out around highway rest areas because he’s frequenting the public bathrooms trying to gargle marbles for change, culo de chongo, booger eating fuckbucket, Lemon Party-lusting, Pissflap, fucknuckles, is about as real as a Civil War Issue polyester blanket, Menstrual quimsquirt, you’re as useful as Anne Frank’s Drum Set, overzealous polyp burglar, poser quim squirt, bed wetting, follows in Victorious Felder’s bovine excrement -filled boots, I wanna get a running start and drop kick him right in the ‘ol yogurt gun, Fustilarian, Knobgobble, prancing pony penis puffer, Likes to turn his mouth into a day care center with guys baby gravy behind the local truck stop, I hope his rectum is popped so hard, he will achieve liftoff on Mr. Tiny’s launch pad, less popular than a Cheese and Veggie Omelet MRE, You are so full of shit, your ears stink, I hope your wife brings a date to your funeral, butt-pirate, as popular as an SBD fart in church on a packed house Sunday, you should get dorked in the squeakhole with the Barbed Cock of Satan, toadstool slime-inhaling dick-drizzling sludge, putrid barrel of fermenting manatee prostatic fluid, prodigious jenkem huffer, You’re a dirty coffee mug on a Monday morning filled to the brim with steaming frothy panther piss, Asparagus-dick, as fucked up as an opossum eating shit out of a hairbrush, Champion Jailhouse Baloney Pony Rider, You’re dumber than snake mittens, Wooden dildo, assplow, Piss Whistle, moron, Poodle Raper, cunt fart, Prevaricating orally diarrhetic sphincter mouth, lintlicker, Wino sphincter/ballsack coinesseur, Cock Bagel and Dick Doughnut, Stronzo, Pie-Faced Crotch Pheasant, Road apple, Mule muffins, Buffalo bagels, Beaver biscuits, pony pucks & Pigeon pellets (Shout out to M*A*S*H Col. Potter) (Not Colonel Potter but if he’d have thought about it, he’d have said it. ) one giant pile of Moose marbles, Straight Up Stupid Motherfucker, manpleaser, this buttmunch needs to eat out the rotten asshole of a road-killed skunk, baby unit, one eyed snake charmer, People like this make me wanna hatefuck a dumpster, on fire and then give sloppy seconds to a menstruating porcupine , Shit-Slot Cosmonaut, Proper Daft Cunt, you thought you had a hair on your dick until it peed, zombies would take one look at you and walk the other direction, Do you know who has more friends and is more popular than you? The Shit Pool at Kandahar Airfield Afghanistan, he has less brains than a bony eared assfish if he thought he would continue to get away with his bullshit, Fair suck of the sav, is so unimaginably and extraordinarily vapid and mindlessly stupid that he could get lost in an elevator, Meretricious, you’ll never be the man your mother is, Odious Twonk, he is just a rock with lips rocking the dick head look, likes to suck the turds out of rabid dogs bungholes, He looks like the kind of guy that really needs to take a bath…with a toaster. baby cave, analconda, Grade A chode yodeler, tittilating scrotalator pole smoker, Vaginal Sand Fairy, Drollenpijper, wide open mouth pivot man in a circle jerk, feral abacus, leg humper, You look like you were conceived through anal, meadow muffin, ax wound drippings, you’re such a loser, when you spank your little wee-wee, your hand falls asleep, horse squeeze Ball Cheese, you were born after your Dad cream-pied her asshole then finger fucked her vagina, your “heroic “ career is less believable than UFOs, Bigfoot and the Loch Ness Monster, you are the poster child for ED, when I want to terrorize my children, I tell YOU are under their bed,
              when I saw this sperm receptacle, soggy biscuit eater, my eyes rolled so hard I saw my own brain stem, I cannot believe how incredibly stupid you are. I mean rock-hard stupid. Dehydrated-rock-hard stupid, Stupid, so stupid it goes way beyond the stupid we know into a whole different dimension of stupid. You are trans-stupid stupid. Meta-stupid. Stupid collapsed on itself so far that even the neutrons have collapsed. Stupid gotten so dense that no intellect can escape. Singularity stupid. Blazing hot mid-day sun on Mercury stupid, you emit more stupid in one second than our entire galaxy emits in a year. Quasar stupid, nothing in our universe can really be this stupid. Perhaps this is some primordial fragment from the original big bang of stupid. Some pure essence of a stupid so uncontaminated by anything else as to be beyond the laws of physics that we know, Schlumpadinka, wazzock, Tampon Tunnel, used toilet paper-sniffing Turbo knob vacuum of a meat gazer, terminal crotch infection, asshat, roach turd-munching shit-for-brains, a black hole would spit you out, the founding fathers said all men are created equal….except for you, you make scientists contemplate the possibility that there’s a negative IQ number, if you an 2 other guys ran a race together, you’d come in fourth, dick pickle, gòrach pìos de cac, It looks like he smeared super glue on his lip and chin and went down on Whoopi Goldberg’s cootchie, You make PTSD/TBI look like a state fair, a 3 ring circus and Disneyland all rolled into one, likes to gargle with a mouthful of unborn crib midgets, He can shit and fall in it as far as I am concerned(This one is for the Ladies and Medical Staff) this prancing fairy is about as popular as a failed Episiotomy with a 4th degree perineal tear, wanker, herpes-ridden dung beetle target, feejackapeesack, first volunteer for being part of a jailhouse human centipede, bunghole warrior, cockwomble, bread loaf end slice, should eat a nice steaming pile of monkey shit you ass clown, looks like hammered dog shit, Your mother may have told you that you could be anything you wanted, but a douchebag wasn’t what she meant, If Mr. Rogers were alive, he’d piss on your grave, helmet wearing short bus riding window licker, Head paddler in the douche canoe, Uncle Fucker, more ate up than a chocolate dildo in a crowded gay bar, shitbag, dipstickus giganticus, Humpty Dumpty cleanup man after the fleet visits Naples, Herp-Burger, poofter, intergalactic cunt muffin, knob gobbling, fimicolous galactic Jackoff, Deputy executive assistant jizz mopper in training, chronic hemorrhoid, stugatz, inbred, toe-jam from an infected Filipino hooker that specializes in foot jobs, tortured turnip turd, Sea Donkey, festering pool of anal leakage, your penis lives in eternal darkness, I’d hate to see your toilet, retardus maximus, Microcephalic Toad Licker, can go suck a fat baby’s dick, steaming rat-felching bucket of moldy monkey fuck, Bellicose ball gnashing raper of babies with rabies, Pecker-puffing pickle licker, catcher not pitcher, bawbag, about as useful as a white crayon, Arschloch, impotent koekeloeren, slaptard, couldn’t even be trained in my AFSC in the USAF to suck farts out of C-5 seat cushions, mumpsimus, reverse dirty sanchez lover, scunner, kutomba wewe, Cryptosporidium-ridden tire tosser, fudgepacker, turbo douche & enema nozzle, mental midget, likes to molest small farm animals, dead and alive, is a hemorrhoid, 100 retarded monkeys could jerk off in a stagnant swamp and generate a better life form than you, You are about as useful as a knitted condom, if I had the taste of you in my mouth, I’d lick the taint of a dead rotting water buffalo in the Vietnamese jungle just to get the taste out, just to fix your shit, you could make a Jew deny the Holocaust, you are the reason Jesus can’t play peek-a-boo, he has holes in his hands, you are a 0 EPR/OPR, you are worse than a Dishonorable Discharge….from your Mom’s vagina, Massive, back alley, bucket of schlong fuck juice, cockalorum cum-guzzling gutter slut, Dalton Coldiron’s bunny-butt buddy atomic sphincter goblin, If you stuck your brain up a gnat’s ass, it would look like a BB in a boxcar, Jackanape, Fuck Tart, Sitzpinkler, lispian, pussytits, Milksop,

              • ChipNASA says:

                you’re such an embarrassment to your family and your father is so ashamed of you, he’d refuse a free blowjob out of fear of further spilling his seed, Forrest Gump points and laughs at you, you suck so bad, AIDS and Cancer have nightmares about you, your shit is about as funny as Anne Frank, Helen Keller and Terri Schiavo having an orgy in the showers at Auschwitz, you suck so bad, puppies, kittens and babies hate you, you are so loathsome, looks like the kind of guy who lets his wife gets her shit pushed in by Mr. Ouch while he watches, Gandhi would ass rape you for giggles, you are about as welcome as a yeast infection, hemorrhoids, gonorrhea, syphilis, chlamydia, genital wards and herpes, you’re one of the reasons Trump is President, you make God want a do-over, You vacuous, toffee-nosed malodorous pervert, pillock, puss soaked jackwagon, waste of trace elements and water, Jizztissue, knob breath dick biscuit, Pettifogger, Bunghole Baby,Rear Admiral of the Butt Piracy, donkey raping shit-eater, twatface, pedicabo ego vos et irrumabo it, may he lay a lip lock on the snotty end of a moose cock,butt munch, deep sea crotch lobster, man of the night in a large animal bordello, I bet you’re the kind of guy that would fuck your own mother in the ass and not even have the goddamn common courtesy to give her a reach-around (Thanks R. Lee Ermey, R.I.P.) WAS wounded in combat, DID receive a legit Purple Heart (THAT’S A FIRST!), however, has a long relationship with Law Enforcement and the courts and NOT in a good way, IS a FELON, and has been convicted of Burglary, Child Abuse, Spouse Battery, Battery to a LEO, so he’s a total shitbag and worthless fuckstain, ,
                did have about 9 years of honorable service BUT YOU JUST SHIT ALL OVER THAT PAL!!, TOTALLY a retarded, soul patch ball dusting, burn pit of worthlessness, you know the old saying “don’t throw the baby out with the bath water?” You would be the exception, he can go fuck a hill of dildos, you’re so fugly, you could make the Sun go down and not want to come up again, you make people that know you, want ass cancer, you make Hillary Clinton’s vagina look attractive, should be blowing everyone in cell block D and taking it up the ass, simultaneously from everyone in cell block C, You fucking LAND WALRUS, shit snorting stain on Hillary Clinton’s yeast infected kootchie covers, you’re lucky we don’t dress you up in drag, drop your ass off somewhere in the Middle East and let an entire battalion of ISIS soldiers and supporters butt rape you until you’re turned inside out, remember that story in the news a while back about a guy that was arrested for fucking his girlfriend’s dog that had been dead for a few days, in front of a daycare center? Yeah, you’re worse than that guy, you make child rape and crib death seem funny, you are such a fuckgasim, you’d leave Don Rickles speechless, you could make Goodwill, the Salvation Army and the Red Cross give you the finger, You make your own Mother cry on Mother’s Day, you’re the reason proctologists are a thing, seeing you frolicking around in all your finery makes me understand why Abba wrote the song Dancing Queen, I’d rather watch AFRTS than see this guy’s shit on the Internet, if you were a planet, you’d be Uranus, YOU are the reason monkeys throw poop, you stupid toilet mint licker, Hitler wishes he had you as a mentor because now he feels like a failure, Ball Basting Boy Wondor, What an oily little meatgazer, planetary level atomic flaming douchebag, Santorium, lying shitbag wanna-be fucknozzle cleaner, Impacted breaching turtle head, Rumpleforeskin, fuckstain skidmark on the underwear of life, anal bum cover (LOL SNL Jeopardy), taint cookie, Mr. Men’s Room Wide Stance toe tapping glory hole hero, Fartleberry, Some NCO Should have beat you within an inch of your life, insult to humanity, I hope his ego hits the floor like a turd from a tall cows ass, shit-filled meatsack, masturbates to videos of Jar-Jar Binks, YOU’RE THE REASON ALIENS COME TO EARTH IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT AND STICK THINGS UP OUR ASSES BECAUSE EVEN ADVANCED CIVILIZATIONS CAN’T FIGURE YOUR SHIT OUT, walking shart shooter, minge, moldy dingleberry on a roadkill swamp rat’s ass,
                test subject for Preparations A thru G, Remedy critch, Gnard gargling queefsquirt, I heard you were created via frozen embryo, you must have thawed, obstreperous shit-whistle,what’s gross, a truckload of dead babies, what’s grosser than gross, a truckload of dead babies with a live one in the middle trying to eat its way out, what is more disgusting than that? You, stupid enough to try to sandpaper to a wildcat’s ass in a phone booth, Handgallop, twatscicle, Obamawad, tool, bint, sleezebag, weaksauce, Gobshite, fuck hole, Pillsbury Dough Bitch, Should NOT be around WOMEN OR CHILDREN, touches himself inappropriately, Turd-Burglar, rimjobber, turd lizard of a roadkill opossum-humper, cum-dumpster, Inbred buck-toothed slimy toadstool on a Swamp Donkey turd, Useless mangy crotch-dropping, needle dick buttfucker, Putz, rectal inspector, this swollen, sweltering manhole should be infected with herpegonasyphilaids, ferger, Sheep tits, gonad, queefer, chicken shit, choad, Puppy fucker, dopus, Blue Falcon and Blue Waffle, Fuck Apple with mold, twizzletits, tallywacker, Bozack, Fiction-flinging Richard Gere’s Ass Gerbil Felcher, dingleberry circling ass buzzard, bitch, Saprophyte, ATM, pap smear, bukakke glazed shitmitten, Dandy prat, Tazmanian Dorkwad rat fucking, shit-sucking warthog’s asshole, gimp, bescumber, coccydynia, you lying sack of mosquito, Siberian bag of cum-stained hadji sheep shit”, mangina micropeen, Fuckrag, Syphilitic Turd Burglar, possibly likes to pick his teeth with his OWN used catheters, Hircismus, cheat, You couldn’t make a point if someone gave you a pencil sharpener, should be pounded in the poop hole with a turret of a M1 Abrams, and then fired a WP round therein, pope-fondling, turbo apeshit crazy, Cacafuego, Cock-juggling *Pussy* thundercunt.
                If any of this offends you, I’m sorry. If something here *doesn’t* offend you, I’m not trying hard enough!
                We now include the NEW & IMPROVED
                OFFICIAL TAH BINGO CARD®™
                /FREE with every deployment of an equal or greater value
                The Hemisphere of Insults®™
                https://imgur.com/nGqi3aR

                FUCK YOU, ASS HAMSTER!!!
                Can I get an AMEN?! (Or your choice of exclamation/interjection.)
                Here endeth the lesson.

                Oh and one time Blake Morgan said: “ I swear I was hearing “O Beautiful for spacious skies… For amber waves of grain” playing as I was reading this…. “

                So without further ado, here is a link to the New York Orchestra performing America the Beautiful, at Carnegie Hall, for your listening pleasure, if you want a musical accompaniment to the The Hemisphere of Insults®™

  17. Slick Goodlin says:

    As long as we’re striving for accuracy, the description of the ceremony from the Seabee website make a common error referring to a 21 Gun Salute.

    One of the customs rendered for a deceased veteran is a Rifle Volley, not a 21 Gun Salute. The 2 customs are often confused and misidentified, even among veterans, but are distinctly different traditions with different origins and meanings.

    The 21 Gun Salute is this nation’s highest protocol gun salute and the only individuals it is rendered to are Presidents, heads of state and reigning royalty.

    Specifically, 21 guns (cannons firing blank charges 21 times) are fired in salute only as a formal greeting or farewell to a sovereign or chief of state of a foreign nation, a member of a reigning royal family, and the President, ex-President, and President-elect of the United States.

    It is also fired at noon of the day of the funeral of a President, ex-President, or President-elect.

    Lesser gun salutes are rendered as a formal greeting to military and civilian leaders of this and other nations. The number of guns is based on their protocol rank.

    On the other hand, anyone who is entitled to a military funeral (generally anyone who dies on active duty, honorably discharged veterans and military retirees) are entitled to 3 Rifle Volleys (rifles firing blanks into the air in 3 separate volleys). This is actually not a gun salute, but a funereal custom. They are referred to as Rifle Volleys.

    This from the Arlington National Cemetery Website:

    http://www.arlingtoncemetery.net/customs.htm

    Practice of firing 3 rifle volleys ofer the grave:

    “The fact that the firing party consists of seven riflemen, firing three volleys does not constitute a 21-gun salute.”

    The 3 volleys come from an old battlefield custom of a bygone era. The two warring sides would cease hostilities to clear their dead from the battlefield, and the sound of 3 volleys firing signaled that the dead had been properly cared for and the side was ready to resume the battle.

    • Steve Balm says:

      Good point. Nice background. Thanks for this info.

    • Jay says:

      Thank you for clarifying that. I get so exhausted trying to explain the difference between a “3rd volley” and a “21 gun salute” to people. When I pulled funeral details on I&I for pure man power issues, we had details of 3-5-7 shooters sometimes.

      Of course, I always get the smart ass,”Well, you got 7 shooters. They shoot 3 shots. Thats a 21 gun salute, right?”

      No dickhead. If you knew how shitty and unreliable blanks were….we have seven shooters to be lucky enough to get 3 volleys off.

  18. AW1Ed says:

    Way to take an excellent record of service and dump all over it. Compare Steffener to the CWO 3 in the post above, and understand why Mason and I do the work for Valor Friday.
    (Mason deserves the credit; I just add some graphics and post his work)

    • NECCSEABEECPO says:

      No, you should have used Marvin G Shield a CM3 (Seabee) in NAM who earned the MOH for getting wounded three times and then lost his life after saving the Base. This was the First KIA for Navy in NAM and first MOH for the Navy and Seabees.

      This jack ass doesn’t even deserve the title Seabee, Diver and Rate as a CM.

  19. A Proud Infidel®™ says:

    Mark Edwin Steffener fucketh himself into unwanted Google®™ fame.

  20. Jay says:

    Holy shit. LEGIT SeaBee. LEGIT Purple Heart. LEGIT NavyComm WITH A V! And its STILL NOT ENOUGH!

    I just can’t with these guys.

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