Montana phony Coast Guardsman ID’d
Green Thumb sends us a link to the Missoulian which reports that the Lake County Sheriff’s Department has identified the fellow who has been impersonating a Coast Guardsman in an effort, according to at least one report, to get free beer.
Ryan Lowden, 33, will be charged with three felony counts of Impersonating a Public Official when he appears in Lake County Justice Court on Aug. 16 for an initial appearance.
On Thursday, Aug. 10, Lake County Sheriff’s detectives conducted a search at Lowden’s residence. Coast Guard clothing, similar to what witnesses had reported him wearing, was located.
Category: Phony soldiers, Valor Vultures
Busted. Should have just bought your own beer, stupid.
Boom!
Three felony counts.
That’ll leave a mark.
Assclown.
Hope he has a hankering for the Cockmeat Sammich… that’s all that’s on the menu at the BTJT Deli at the local poundhimintheass jail!
Yeah, when this was first ported the other day, their Facebook page said they know the identity of the individual but were still completing the investigation. For once Social Media was helpful in catching a crook.
Way to go dickmuncher.
You are actually *stupider* than you look.
He’s sunk.
^^^
I see what you did there.
Do you want to float any more observations?
Nah, I’ll just cruise on for a while.
Just flow with it and ride with the tide.
Unlike DOD military personnel, USCG personnel have some law-enforcement powers and responsibilities when performing many of their duties. They should charge this guy with impersonating an LEO to make it even more serious…
Which is probably why he got nailed with the felonies in the first place.
One of my colleagues has lived an ummm exciting life. When he graduated from college he tells me that he thought about joining the Coast Guard and becoming an aviator. Since his degree is in physics and he had a very strong GPA, the CG recruiters were pretty excited. Then his records check came back… They way he tells the story is they asked him to come on down to the recruiting station, went over his records and then said, “Mike, you do know that the Coast Guard is a LAW ENFORCEMENT agency right…?”
Sad to say, Mike now works for the state.
Oops…
Well, that escalated quickly…
What, no mug shot yet? I need something for my dartboard, and so does Toasty Coastie.
You got that right Ex…. This Jiggy Puff Flap Dragon needs to be dragged behind his little water scooter for a few miles.
I’m glad you’re up and about, TC.
Thanks Ex 🙂 Only for a little bit, third surgery is in 2 weeks. Yay me! lol By the time they finish, I’ll be a freaking Sparkling Bionic Woman with Glitter for crud sake…smdh…oh well such is life. This is the song the orchestra plays so we will dance to it.
Hopefully in the time being, well get a new chew toy to play with. 👿
Take care of yourself. The Puddle Navy needs bionic women. And we do as well.
Thank you Graybeard, I will. If all goes well Ill be back to help insult our POSers and chew toys in no time 🙂
Much affection to you and your family <3
Make yourself the Ultimate Grilled Cheese sandwich when it’s over.
Oooooo you know I will lol grilled cheese on thick homemade bread with tomato and bacon….doesn’t get any better than that :)Well maybe if you add a cup of tomato bisque with crackers… I could die a very happy Sad Little Man with Boobs haha!:)
I thought you were supposed to be strange and fake, too. (smile)
Best of luck, lass. Get better soon.
lol Hondo, you are right haha! How I miss our Cheeseslayer lol 👿
Thank you for your good wishes Sir, and much affection to you and your family.
Praying for a positive outcome for you, TC.
Thank you HMC. 🙂
If all goes well, there will be Apple Bourbun and Walnut Monkey Bread and Maple Pecan Scones 🙂
Jalapeno Cheddar cheese bread toasted with crunchy peanut butter. Just like mom used to make. Oh yea and a couple of San Miguel’s to wash it down. Get well soon.
Little Worcestershire peps that one right up
What a loser.
He does get a “A” for originality.
I hope that creativity works in front of the judge.
He gonna *SQUEEEEEEEEAL* like a good little piggy for Bubba & Thor!!! He dared to
pull that shit up in Montana and to me it’s a wonder he didn’t get his stupid little flesh pickle-tasting ass shot!
Bet he comes back as a fake ice cream truck driver.
Good-bye, Faker Coastie
Po-Po hung a name on you
When they send your azz to jail soon
No one’s gonna miss you
Gotta love that the Sheriff is also the Coroner.
An average day in court….
“No, your honor, no foul play suspected. Suspect died from four self inflicted gunshot wounds according to the Coroner’s report.”
/SARC/
What did he know about Hillary?
Awright!
I got dibs on his PWC.
How do we know it’s not stolen and he was running around on it with fake registration numbers?
Bad buoy. bad buoy.
Whatcha gonna do when dey come for you-ee
Bad buoy. bad buoy.
Before he gets sent to the can, take this pos out to the Oregon coast and strap him down to the bow of an mlb they have at the surf stations, and have the boat crew train in heavy weather.
Better yet, don’t strap him on. Let him hang on while the 44 does barrel rolls over the breaking bar. As someone who has served on lifeboats in southern Oregon I can attest to the excitement that a twenty or twentyfive foot breaker generates. The pacific is cold no matter the time of year.
Send him here:
https://www.gocoastguard.com/about-the-coast-guard/experience-the-coast-guard/nothing-disappointing-at-cape-disappointment
He actually did serve in the Coast Guard and was stationed on the Oregon Coast for 8 years.
Based on some research on GOOGLE using his age and name, I THINK this guy’s real name is William Ryan Lowden and is a registered Sex Offender in Oregon and Montana.