OPM staffed with feckless boobs

The Office of Personnel Management is staffed with the most irresponsible, unresponsive, feckless morons on the face of the planet. As you can tell, I have my own issues with them aside from the fact they shared my personal information, along with that of my entire family, with Chinese hackers, me and 22 million other Americans. Their response to that hack, which happened eight months before they bothered to tell us about it, has been to share our information with even more people – those who aren’t as adept as the Chinese, apparently.

They sent an email to all of us soliciting our PII yet again – that email triggered a phishing warning to Army personnel from the Army Threat Integration Center because it replicates what criminals do when they send out phishing attempts, according to the Army Times;

The email, a copy of which was posted along with the Fort Meade Facebook warning, has some traits that can serve as warning lights for a potential phishing operation, in which emailers attempt to gain access to private information by sending documents that appear to be from banks or other reputable agents:

The sender, using a dot-com address, doesn’t match the federal agency represented in the subject line (“Important Message from the U.S. Office of Personnel Management CIO”), who would be more likely to send an email from a dot-gov address.
The email includes a link that asks the recipient for personal information. Multiple anti-phishing publications carry warnings similar to the one found on OPM’s cybersecurity Web page: “Never click on links you don’t trust and don’t give out your personal information.”
The email includes a clickable “Enroll Now” button for readers to access the fraud-protection service. Many anti-phishing guidelines include a warning to manually enter all URLs; follow-up versions of the email included the link text.

The OPM’s response?

OPM spokesman Sam Schumach said the notification effort’s success rate – 22 percent of the targeted workers signed up for the program – dwarfed that of similar responses to public- and private-sector hacks, which are often in the low- to mid-single digits.

Still, “there were things that could have gone better,” said Schumach.

I’m one of the 78% who looked at what they wanted me to do to enroll and closed the window instead. But like I said, I have my own issues with OPM, which I believe is staffed with illiterate drunken hobos that someone, probably Joe Biden, rounds up every morning from the steam grates outside their building. I’ll be developing that story over the next few weeks and share my findings with you at the conclusion of my investigation.

Category: Politics