Guardian’s new military ANALyst
Nicki is just trying to piss me off today by sending us this link to the Guardian;
How desperate does the Guardian have to be to have an ANALyst on their staff who is currently serving in Leavenworth for crimes against his country? And, oh, by the way, he was a fricken private when he got arrested for committing his crime, so tell me, what special insight could a private provide the world?
Insight like this;
Based on my experience as an all-source analyst in Iraq during the organization’s relative infancy, Isis cannot be defeated by bombs and bullets – even as the fight is taken to Syria, even if it is conducted by non-Western forces with air support.
“Based on my experience” as an infantry platoon sergeant, Manning is a complete idiot and has nothing of value to add to the discussion of global affairs.
The Guardian is and always has been a real piece of shit publication, but this is lower than whale shit. What next? Is Charles Manson going to be their crime reporter?
Category: Dumbass Bullshit
I read this wrong; I thought it said that breanna chelsea was becoming an analyst of anuses…Oops, my bad…
Jeffrey Dahmer could be their food critic.
Bradley is just a whine critic.
Ted Bundy could be their dating expert. What a piece of shit rag. Manning should be swinging from a tall oak tree right now.
Ed Gein should be in charge of the Children’s Affairs department.
Damnit, not Ed Gein… John Wayne Gacy.
I don’t know why I always get those two confused.
Ed Gein should be their Archaeology expert instead.
Here Jonn – this will cheer you up and put things back into perspective…
http://www.foxnews.com/us/2014/09/16/deaf-students-push-for-right-to-serve-in-military/
Fucking Christ on a pogo stick! People really don’t understand what the military is for or what a ‘right’ is do they?
A right doesn’t mean you are given a job just because you want it. The military isn’t a job training program either!
Fucking Hell, I seriously think they do this just because they know it will screw the military’s ability to fulfill its mission.
Let them, what could POSSIBLY go wrong? /sarc
I’m sorry, what did you say? Again, I didn’t get that, can you speak louder, what did you just say Sir? I don’t understand sign language Sir, can you write it down for me?
well it would cut down on the number of VA disability claims for hearing loss.
*clicks*…..SMMFH….ruefully…..
Load one round…..insert barrel in mouth.
*pulls trigger*.
/no reason to live any more.
(Ok I’m exaggerating bu still….SHEESH)
What his Qualifications should read; “Based on my extensive experiences as a shitty ass private, and traitor to my country….”
Heh…. you said “ass private.” he he he
Yes, yes I did… betting his looks like the Holland Tunnel now too.
Oh CHRIST!!!! Was that even necessary?
Now I need a bath in boiling Listerine and some mind bleach. YUCK!!!
Sorry, I am just lmfao!! Hopefully you get the vision out of your head soon. I almost added to it, but decided to be nice to you.
*headdesk*
Hey, at least he didn’t say Bradley looks real “Goatsey” these days . . . . (smile)
I may have just died a little inside.
Don’t forget his other credential:
“Physically assaulted a female Soldier, who in turn kicked his ass.”
This is what happend when an inmate in the PENAL system is THRUSTED into a position as an ANALyst!
I’m betting he really sucks, too…….
What would almost be better is if he had been an E-nothing in the Navy… just leave the ‘a’ off.
Well, Jonn – I figured I wasn’t going to be the ONLY one with my head exploding today! Fucking seriously???? This is what I had on my Facebook. Jonn saw it earlier.
“Based on my intelligence work in Iraq during that period…”
Translation: “Based on my theft and release of classified information that caused thousands of ACTUAL intelligence analysts to work 24/7 to assess the damage I have caused, because I was a whining, sniveling fucking bitch…”
Essentially the whining cunt thinks we should just let ISIL be – put a nice big fence around their little caliphate and let them destroy themselves a la “Escape from New York.”
That’s some foreign policy there, spanky!
I like the setting of clear, temporary borders that will be maintained by ISIS’ unwillingness to create a humanitarian crisis because any direct military action only strengthens ISIS. Sounds completely plausible to me.
Perhaps in setting clear, temporary borders, this is what he/she/it meant:
http://www.lowes.com/cd_Install+an+Electronic+Dog+Fence_700388417_
We actually tried that in Vietnam along the DMZ (Operation Igloo White).
Didn’t work worth a damn.
I am surprised All-Points Logistics and their CEO Commander Phil Monkress have not reached out to Manning to come aboard.
But maybe they have, who knows?
Chelsea, you look retarded. I’m sorry, but red never, ever will be a color I ever want to see you have.
Ever.
In any case, why should I pay any attention to you if you can’t even use basic grammar, spelling, OR realize that ISIS is an abbreviation rather than “Isis”, the Egyptian god.
Next they’ll be asking Bergdahl to give an inside perspective as a known traitor who was set free by obama.
Disgusting.
Next the Guardian will want Nidal Malik Hasan’s input on all things Islamic.
Just another reason to be saddened by the lack of death by firing squad for this traitor.
As long as he lives some assholes are going to want to get his opinion on the world, which is odd because he wants to cut his dick off and become a woman.
You would think that sort of thinking would alter your ability to perceive the world as it is slightly and render your opinion and analysis somewhat suspect.
He can go right ahead and cut it off. He still won’t be a woman. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: all he’ll ever be is a fucking eunuch.
If he really wants to go from “traitor” to “dickless traitor,” I vote to toss a cigarette lighter and a pair of scissors into his cell and say, “Here ya go, shitbag. Knock yourself out.”
Give him a catheter and a couple of those bands they use to neuter sheep “humanely”. No blood involved, and the problem takes care of itself in a few days.
Hondo, those bands only work if the balls have dropped. In Manning’s case, I don’t think they ever did.
Had to have – otherwise he’d have failed the induction physical.
Whether they ever functioned or were used as anything but decorations is a separate question.
Roger,forgot about the induction physical. Unless he was examined by the old doctor at the Denver MEPS who was constantly failing pregnant virgins.
Unless & until science finds a way to reverse that pesky XX-XY chromosome biddness, then he’s always going to be a male.
Sex-change operations are like those dress-up Rolls Royce kits you could buy for your Volkswagen Beetle. In the end, no one was ever fooled into believing that it was a REAL Rolls Royce.
Same thing with changing out the plumbing. He’s still going to have shoulders too wide, hips too narrow, and that whole male chromosome thing to deal with.
He’s also never going to see the outside of Leavenworth, unless he’s transferred to another prison, so he really ought not to be allowed to have the surgery at taxpayer’s expense.
Firing squad? No freaking way.
A firing squad is a dignified, military execution. A turncoat who sells out their nation doesn’t deserve that.
Hanging them like a common criminal is IMO far more apropos.
Either one gets us to our common goal, though.
Yes, but a firing squad IMO sends entirely the wrong message.
A member of the military forfeits that status when they go turncoat. At that point, they are not deserving of any military honor, respect, or dignity. They should be done in as we would any common criminal, not with a uniquely military execution.
I will admit that the idea of a forcible exit from an aircraft at about 10,000′ AGL sans parachute does have a certain appeal in the case of such a-holes, though. At around 300ft per second terminal velocity, they’d have plenty of time to consider the error of their ways on the way down . . . .
You forgot to add that the rope is reusable so it saves money and the environment!
😀
True dat. (smile)
I recommend either drawing and quartering or burning at the stake.
Personally, I’d be OK with either of those forms of capital punishment for people convicted of treason, espionage, or the UCMJ offense of aiding the enemy. Ditto any of a number of other painful ways to assist a (by common definition) traitor in bidding this life adieu.
Unfortunately, I’m quite positive the SCOTUS wouldn’t be OK with any of them.
Why would we have to run it by SCOTUS? Just hand some extra canteen privileges to some of his fellow inmates, and let them no what you want done.
Have the guards take a few extra minutes on their coffee break, and have a few cell doors “accidentally” come open due to a “software glitch” that also shuts down the CCTV and alarm system.
And hanging them properly as the Navy used to do: from a yardarm and not by drop but by hoisting them aloft with neck in noose, thus the expression, “Dancing from the yardarm.” Rather than snapping the neck for instantaneous death, it gives them a few minutes of “dancing” to contemplate their treachery.
Word on the street is Jerry Sandusky is the new Child Safety columnist
I got the word from Guardian Wine Critic Psul Wickre
Or travel reporter Daniel Bernath.
Health and Fitness Column – Round Ranger.
I would recommend Jay Kerwin.
Plus he already knows his way around a military prison.
Just saying.
Sparky, you sure you don’t want Bernath for Aviation consultant?
Figured that would cover it, and he can use DullASS as his traveling butt-buddy and shop a few pics of them flying together.
Plus, I’m sure one or both of them could give tips on what to do if one finds themselves in a Turkish prison…
Just in. Psul reports that the 4th week August 2014 vintage Night Train is superb. “Spicy, fruity and “snappy”, this wine was a perfect companion on this hot, humid night while cruising the internet”
They could hire president mom-jeans to write their golf columns…….
Word also has it that All-Points Logistics in angling for the logistical contract.
Green Thumb says:
” Word also has it that All-Points Logistics in angling for the logistical contract. ”
Face Down, Ass Up. 😀
We’re just never going to be able to forget this little puke. We’ll be reminded here and there the whole time he/she’s in there, and as soon as he/she gets out, it’s time to become a talking head on every tv show ever. That somebody can turn their professional breakdown into a ticket to being set for life really, really bugs me. It’s not entirely about what he/she did to get there–IMO, that’s just a symptom of he/she being a complete shitbag. Since TV seemingly loves to torture me with an endless parade of truly awful people, and doesn’t give a rip what I think about that, it’s pretty well just going to happen.
Welp, I guess that settles it for the Guardian being on the same level as the Daily Mail, Sun, and Mirror. Guess only the Telegraph and maybe the BBC are worth a damn.
Or The Times of London.
What might be going on with the Guardian using Manning as a commentator is that it keeps the pot boiling on the larger Wikileaks story. Why that would matter is because Julian Assange has been camped out in the Ecuadoran Embassy for the past two years, and the Ecuadorans have apparently been making noises about wanting him gone. Soon.
Personally, I think Bradley Manning’s opinion on almost anything counts for about as much as that of the Golden Retriever who lives next door.
And they both howl at the moon.
On behalf of Goldens everywhere, that is slanderous bullshit. No Golden would stoop that low.
Next up, Daniel A. Bernath, Aviation and legal columnist for The Guardian.
Followed by Jimmy Carter as political columnist…wait a minute, WTF.
The only thing that The Eunuch Bradley Manning knows anything about is how to properly self-administer an enema prior to receiving your cellmate’s dick up your ass.
Forgive me if I don’t take advice on winning any kind of fight from a sexually-confused eunuch traitor who got his ass beat by a girl.
Not just beaten, it was said she had Manning pinned and screaming like a jailhouse BITCH!!
This is exactly a strategy that I would expect to see from a junior enlisted soldier with no education or background in strategy. I have to assume that his desired end state is the destruction of ISIS, with his ways being his four “arenas”. Unfortunately, he seems to have forgotten to develop the means by which one would achieve these ends but has instead used a liberal amount of hope and positive assumptions.
Oh, I’m sure he’s using a liberal amount of something alright (KY perhaps) but it sure ain’t hope.
As far as his desired end state, he-he – see above.
sounds like a community organizer to me…
Hope is not a plan!
Remember: “Hope and change”. Or was it, “Hope for change”? Or “Hope I have some change left after I pay for my groceries”?
Manning: “Hope for Sex Change”.
I probably know more about ISIS that that ass-whistler. I am allowed unrestricted access to the internet, television, and newspapers. I am also able to talk to specialists in the field of Middle Eastern studies and have a background in religious studies (light on the Islam/Christian/Jewish interactions, but it’s still there).
Seriously-he’s an inmate in a military prison, tell me that his hair does not actually look like that.
According to The Guardian, that’s an artist’s rendering based on how Manning wants the world to see him.
How precious. I wonder if he “wanted the world to see him” as a unicorn if they would have accommodated that.
Jonn,
We all know that is BS …
Truth be told that is an artist’s rendering based on how Manning wants the prison population to see him.
Just sayin’.
Master Chief, you mean maybe like this guy:
http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=550_1270458485
This had to be a Duffleblog plant story because it’s just too asinine…..
“Just to clarify: the illustration that accompanies the author bio on this piece was made in cooperation with Chelsea Manning, as an artistic representation of how she sees herself”.
Matt Sullivan
US Opinion Editor
The Guardian
Wait until they see the artistic representation of how we see him/her/it…
He/she sees himself as an ugly-ass bitch, then
First comment made on that dumb site got me comment moderated. I guess they really have their panties in a bunch over those who don’t agree with them.
Until this little bitchy boi asswipe actually pees sitting down, has his penis removed permanently, and has been gelded like a boar hog, he’s still a ‘HE’, and is NOT a ‘she’. Period.
And he’s still one butt-ugly excuse for existence, in every possible way.
Ex-PH2, I have a lot of experience with de-nutting hogs. Give me a single edge razor blade and about 10 seconds and I’ll have the job done. Provided that the balls have actually dropped into the sack. If not, then it’s about a 30 second job.
I’ll hobble him, you do the honors. Just remember he wants to go dicless, also. Give him what he wants, then lock the door and throw away the keys.
Oh, but he’s in for life, so the keys are already tossed.
You don’t have to hobble him. The proper way is to held upside down by the ankles,belly/balls facing outward. A grasp/squeeze on the ball sack,two quick slits and a squeeze/pull, then slice twice.In his case a third slice should take care of all exterior equipment. Splash a little antibiotic on the area,then release him to the already cut pen. As far as his balls/dick,let them air dry for about two weeks and I’ll use them as a rear view mirror hanger for my pickup truck.
Yeah, my vet used a hobble on calves and horses. Pull the back legs up, throw them, make two quick cuts and throw the mountain oysters off for the coyotes.
Good trophy idea. Be sure you lacquer everything before attaching the hanger.
Oh,yeah,I would definitely dip them in a good Minwax Polycrylic before hanging. Probably dip them at least three times to insure complete coverage.
He still won’t be a girl, Ex. Sex changes are cosmetic only. He has no ovaries, no uterus, no breasts, and his glands produce testosterone.
He’ll only ever be a eunuch. He will never be a she. End of story. He’s basically the dumber, pussy nephew of Buffalo Bill from “Silence of the Lambs.”
More heads exploding than a Jane Fonda post…
Apparently Manning sees itself as Spicoli from “Fast Times at Ridgemont High”.
Speaking of shitbags…
The Leavenworth Disciplinary Barracks, aka the “Long Course”, lets/provides bandwidth for prisoners to communicate with the media? I’m in a RV at a Navy Base that has no wifi. This sucks. Where’s the Chaplain to punch my TS Card?
Is he still considered “intelligence analyst” by the Army? They should strip rates and reassign them as prisoners upon conviction.
As a private in Military Intelligence, the only thing Manning is qualified to give his “expert opinion” about is (a) the best way to police up a cigarette butt, (b) the location of all the gay bars in Sierra Vista, AZ, and (c) the best place in Riley Barracks to get it on with your “battle buddy” without the Drill Sergeant finding out about it.
How the fuck does this he/she/it/thing rate to report on anything?? Last time I checked, Bradley was a fucking prisoner. I did not think prisoners had all of the rights that us non convicts had. And what the fuck is the Guardian, Britians National Enquirer??
Wow, he got a job writing the puff pieces for the Guardian.
Based on my experiance Pie is better then cake.
Damn.
I should run for president.