Wittgenfeld and Bernath: The Low Spark of High-heeled Boys
Letters from the Dark Side of the Moon…first from Wittlessone:
Hey, Dweeb, why don’t you give me…. [MCPO] the New York Militia my private email…? We need to negotiate..
Now it is obvious as hell that he was in the Navy and he still wears camo… His Navy never wore camo, especially the machinists like Goober [MCPO].
I think maybe that is where he has been appearing as a gay looking man. Now you know a sailor walking swishy is a dead give away right…
We can tell who the are when they talk…right … don’t you know that..?Soooo, when a gay swishy sailor walks into a court room to say he isn’t gay… He’s probably a closet gay and has a hurt butt over their satirical outting, just for fun… like you do, Marky-Mark..
Now a guy who is REALLY NOT GAY would be like water off a ducks back each time a woman sucks his slimy dick.. That is the real world. Surely you been paying attention to the media and it occurs to everybody in America that New York and New Jersey are full of gay sailors….ask them… who cares man…. just the anti-gays…. or the Nazis.. Arian Brotherhood, who…?
Now think about how embarrassing for the Chief of nobody to sing and dance in front of a jury of men & women… How do you convince or prove you are not a gay ? Just stop sucking and sadomizing on court day or better yet , maybe pull out of his butt buddies’ bong-hole for a while; for court reasons..? See where you really are dip shit…. Are you going to be there, because I want to, too..? I think this is going to be a hoot you all will never be able to drop quietly.
BY THE WAY, nobody cares about an honorary verses pay grade kudos… none item… except only to a group of sissified young millennial pusses’. Personally, and you can tell [MCPO] to contact me here, I am going to help make him famous.. NOT GAY… none item… remember that.. If he doesn’t respond here and hides out… there is the judges sign..
You call it “seeding”. Remember..? [MCPO] is a “legacy seeder”… there is your problem… and I know who the other “Legacy Seeders” are also. You know that right..? Sounds like RICO to me..
Did you see me on the front pages of the newspapers recently..? Missed that..? Another self authenticated correct feature… unlike the information you like to perpetuate for your readership cyber/suicide activities.
I have also noticed that some of your motor cycle buddies American Legion have already went to prison for serious shit… You know for the RICO Act. That is what will take you down… Your club, chapter, group, affiliates go to jail too. Right..?
The LRP…
ME:
This from the guy who talked about the N word in a hoodie.
Wittlessone:
Well, Yah…. You know the shooter was let loose for shooting the black punk. What’s that got to do with a gay sailor [MCPO]…
Don’t change the subject to me…. I am just a witness… to this all.
I have many black friends and business associates who called Travon Martin a Miami Vice Niger.. A black Kung Fu never wins against a hispanic pistola.. Did you know that the original slavers refered to the black folks NIGERS because they were captured by NIGERS to sold to the whites who called them all NIGERS from Niger the country.
Now stop it dumb ass.. I have black chick who does “the dirty dog” for me….. get a life .. I have a video…
Now what about those RICO Act prosecutions of the Legion Riders across America. Let’s talk to a grand jury about that… you won’t be invited just arrested…
Meanwhile, back at the Hall of the Justless, from someone TOTALLY not Bernath, but using his email:
SSS pointed out that [MCPO] is a homosexual.
Homos are now openly serving in the US Navy. Why is [MCPO] opposing official US Navy policy?
How do you convince a jury that you have been defamed when homo marriage is legal in many states and and by the time [MCPO] goes to trial in Oregon, will be legal here.
I don’t think they have through through their clever plan.It is surprising that here Mr. Bernath is sitting around being old and these terrorists attack him-sending newspaper reporters at him, lying about him, threatening to murder him. What did Mr. Bernath do to get swept into this madness?
Nothing.
Secret Squirrel Satirist and/or Satire Defense
Me:
You should ask Mr Bernath. He is the legal expert but I am sure he will inform you that false statements involving sexuality receive heightened scrutiny in defamation cases.
Meanwhile you should screw off and leave me alone. Mr Bernath said he might kill you though so be careful.
Totally NOT Bernath:
Mr. Bernath’s legal team says that your knowledge, although recent, is out of date.
Mr. Bernath’s legal team wants to know if you will accept service of summons and complaint by mail or does he have to hire the Marion County Sheriff to put it in your hand?We must communicate with you in the future regarding discovery, deposition dates, meet and confer on discovery disputes before making a motion to compel.
Shall we merely quote you as say, “Screw Off” when we file the declaration with the Court?
Me:
But screw off was to Satire Defense not Daniel Bernath. Wait, are you the same people? You mean Dan Bernath was lying to me? Just like he did about being CPO? Wow. Who could have suspected such a development.
I don’t want to jump the gun, but I am starting to think that Bernath may be playing me with false identities. If you can’t trust a homophobic phony CPO who has Facebook posts about the “Darkies” and his N-word loving client, who can you trust?
It’s like my whole world has gone topsy turvy.
Category: Politics
I think I need my Wonder Twins Decoder Ring Activated and a huge glass of Tang to decipher that Alien Dribble..
Just out of curiosity, where does the NY/NJ militia come into all of this, I only ask because I am stationed in the NY/NJ AOR and work with the milita quite often….
Oh, and another thing, that part of his letter that reads “nobody cares about an honorary verses pay grade kudos” really pisses me off….this should piss off anyone that has donned the anchor, went through CCTI, and stood center stage of their own Rites of Passage…..
Its time for another layer of tinfoil around the cranium!
This can be taken as a threat, but I declare the following:
I hope, pray, and wish that Dallas Wittgenfeld be [loved by all the big animals.]
I know it wouldn’t make him any less crazy, but it might give him happy thoughts and keep him regular for a while.
I would [love] to [also have Dan Bernath loved by big animals] but I’m thinking of the mental well being of the horses.
EDITOR NOTE: Edited so that Bernath will leave me the eff alone.
Witless loser using the “I am not a racist, I got black friends, bang a black chick” line is pathetic.
This is a guy who probably would piss his pants the minute a black dude snaps off at him. I hope that piece of shit goes to the jail and gets turned out by a few bros.
Bernath is so inept that he can’t even pretend to be someone else properly.
You are no fun, Editor. 😛
Over?
“Phildoesque” dudes.
I’m beginning to understand every word. I think I need a vacation.
Thats bad Jonn… Very bad.
Some good whiskey might help clear that up.
You’re retired. No vacations for you. Back to the grindstone, cheesedick.
I, like, totally, you know, want to be in this picture.
I want to be the guy dropping my manload right in their collective faces.
Tongue Bernath (you too, Phildo),
Deep.
Extra deep.
Meatgazers.
“His Navy never wore camo, especially the machinists like Goober [MCPO].”
Hey Witless, Google would have told you the answer to that question:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Uniforms_of_the_United_States_Navy
Look in the section marked “Working Uniforms”
The NWUs are currently in production and were phased into service beginning in January 2009.
Pull your head out of Bernath’s ass once in a while and let some oxygen get to your surviving brain cells.
Now for Souperseeeekritsqwirrl:
Pull your head out of Witless ones ass and let some oxygen get to your surviving brain cells.
Mmmmkay?
GFY and HAVFND
OVER
I’m just dumbfounded…
I did not know teh stupid could run so deep. I think them working together makes it worse, some type of idiotic feedback loop.
It’s a combination of cheap booze and animal buggery that did it to DuLlAsS.
DullAsaStick WhoopItUp&StepInIt and berntwitless have a legal team?
Oh, now I need aspirin just from trying to read that dried road apple pie.
Classic
Someone this far over the edge can be dangerous. Watch your self, don’t go north where you cannot carry.
Holy crap, I speak English, French, Farsi and passable Amharic and I still couldn’t suss out WTF that old, drunk reprobate was trying to say.
Let me just say that as an amateur odds maker, I don’t think it’s good form for Whippenfloggit to be aiding Bernastypants this close to the tourney.
Fair play old boy, fair play. Bernath is going to win or lose this on his own. Sure, the Cheese Warrior is showing he’s a mudder who can slog with the best of them, but Whippenfloggit’s riding his horse too hard into the turn and he’ll gas out too fast to finish.
I have even money odds that Bernath and/or LtCol CheeseNugget will get served or arrested before the Fecal Four just to seal the deal. They don’t need the SHrtBusWindowLiCker, professional town drunk, to move the odds in their favor.
Sadly, there’s only one loser in all this. Well, there’s a lot of losers, but there’s one BIG loser. The Round Warrior of Lenoir. He’s got to be feeling like the last fat girl asked to the prom about now.
Apologies to fat girls everywhere.
With writing like that, please tell us you have a book in the works…..
I’ve always enjoyed Fat Chick Appreciation Night at the Del Mar Enlisted Club.
AKA, “No Pride Night.”
Yup. Go large early!
Or as the “Greaseman” would say – GO UGLY EARLY!!!
The Greaseman…Hadn’t heard that name for a long minute. Is he still on the air somewhere?
Last I knew, he was still in the DC area, don’t know what station.
Another one of his lines about bar hopping with women
“IN WAR, ANY HOLE IS A TRENCH”
Same Greaseman who trumpeted the original MLK Day saying “Just think, if they shot 4 more we’d have the whole week off?” Dude was ancient then – what is he now, 120?
David: he turns 64 this year.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Doug_Tracht
Hobble Do GA GA!!!
/I am old…..DC 101 rocks.
At the Horse and Cow we had Hogger night™.
“bring ’em in, between 18 and 80, if they can’t walk in wheel them in.”
Never won, but finished a strong second once. 🙂
Hmm, Planet Zohr and Jupiter must be passing between the earth and moon.
Witless and Bermbutt must have been using the M777-2B double barreled plasma gun for a bong when it accidentally discharged.
Ho Le Shet!
Wouldn’t it be horrible if someone who lived close by old Whipandflogit let some very fine African Americans in that area know if the racist rants he is vomiting all over the web. I’d hate just hate for that to happen.
I’d hate that, too, Valkyrie, but there is nothing preventing those people from viewing the flaming nutball at work, is there?
I wonder if our Bernath is the same, as the piss poor pilot in this article?
http://www.oregonlive.com/pacific-northwest-news/index.ssf/2013/09/tigard_pilot_uninjured_in_plan.html
Here is the NTSB report of that incident (#WPR13LA396):
http://www.ntsb.gov/aviationquery/brief.aspx?ev_id=20130903X23635&key=1
Yep, that’s the star of our clown show here.
He’s also the lawyer of dubious sanity/morality/humanity/
OAE CPO USN Ret: I think you may have inadvertently forgotten to type “intellect.” after the last slash above.
I stand corrected. It never occurred to me to use Bernath and intellect in the same sentence.
Nothing dubious about it. His mental condition is quite clear.
Yep that would be our very own little hagfish.
Dipstick doesn’t know how to check a real dipstick.
That’s what happens when you’re using the M777-2B double barrel plasma gun for a bong!
Hey Danni, you sure seem fixated on homosexuality. As in obsessed. Bet you see gays everywhere, but especially in your mirror.
almost forgot.
OVER
You know, I get lots of junk mail offers for Viagra and Cialis.
Should I forward those to bernutsless? I don’t think either psul the uncool or dumbasatroutsniffer can use it.
DullAss talks a lot about “gay”. Yeah, Witless must be gay, his own self.
They are probably latent homosexuals who are just now getting in touch with their “sensitive” sides. If I were them, I’d be avoiding any gay or African-American neighborhoods for quite some time.
Where is Old AS TO in this? All tuckered out from squatting in the bushes, are you, psul? Just hangin’ on the sidelines, watching all the fun, wishing you hadn’t been QUITE such a wad of used Christmas wrap?
Pity.
Hey, Valkyrie, I sent you something last night. I hope you got it.
Sad.
Really. It’s just sad. I’m at the point of pity for their families.
This is way worse than watching slow-motion accidents on a snow-covered hiway.
Like the Hindenburg crashing into the Titanic. Oh, the stupidity!
Almost like Witless is Zed from Pulp fiction. And Bernath is the bearded store owner, Wickre is the gimp.
https://imgflip.com/i/8ei8t
Wow … DW wants me to contact him. Won’t happen. There are far more important people who are now interested in him.
And DB wants to negociate … There is nothing to negociate: Bernath is not, never was nor will he ever be a Genuine or Honorary CPO.
NH … Tracking. I just returned tonight. Was OCONUS all week.
Dull ass said “another self authenticated correct feature”. I have no idea what this means. But because he implied that this feature had self authenticated correctly at least once, but possibly more times in the past, I am inclined to think “self authenticated correct feature” is his way of translating “masturbation” into legalese.
Could have meant to write that he is self medicated.
For “self authenticated” to be valid, either (1) the source is trustworthy, or (2) that the material’s content inherently proves it is true.
We’re talking WitLessOne, so (1) above is clearly out. And it’s an example of WitLessOne’s authentic Hoosier-Redneck Hybrid Gibberish – and thus incomprehensible – so (2) is out as well.
Not buying it.
This is not to any member here on This Ain’t Hell. I will not say to whom this is specifically targeted toward, but they will know when they read it. This message is meant for others, in case they miss it while they look at my facebook with their sock puppet accounts. ———- I have warned you. You have not heeded my warning. Instead, you have continued with your little harassment of my friends and family. It is now over. You believe that you know what you are doing, but you have no idea what I can bring to the playing field. You seem to believe that you are so very smart. You are not as smart as you believe yourself to be. You seem to believe that you have so very much power. You are not as powerful as you believe yourself to be. You seem to believe so many truths about yourself. Your truths are all lies and falsehoods spoken to comfort and uplift only yourself. I know you have applied to a couple of the social clubs that I am part of. I am not afraid, because you have no power or authority there. I find it completely laughable that you and your cohorts believe that these little games need to be played. The truth is, you should have quit when you were ahead and just admitted the truth. When you were harassing me, I found it entertaining. You see, I quite enjoy dueling wits with the unarmed. I have been doing it for a very long time in one form or another. I should say, you are too predictable to be in even the top 50% of those who have tried to mess with me. But, I digress. When you brought my spouse into the game we were playing, you ventured dangerously close to an abyss that you did not realize was dangerous. I warned you, but that warning fell upon deaf ears. Today, I learned that you are targeting my closest friends. It is now that you have leaped into the abyss. You see, some… Read more »
I thought that Stacey Keach was Mike Hammer. We better notify IMDB to correct their information. And to save the distinguished honorary kamikaze pilot some time, Hack Stone is really Frank Stallone.
SHIT STATUS UPDATE: JUST GOT REAL
Does this moron not realize that “New South Wales” is in freaking Australia?
Taken at face value, this tool has actually claimed above to have been “threatened” by an internet comment made by someone living almost 1/2 way around the world from him.
Damn. Cuckoo, meet Cocoa Puffs.
How do you file a restraining order against Facebook? Will the order prevent Facebook from completing Bernath’s click on their link?
Jonn – he does it the same way he has against Yelp!… and look at what it’s gotten him
Some people think the helicopters over their heads are black its actually a dark green.
Wait a minute, did I read that right? Bernath the non-CPO thinks comparing the train wreck that he is to a slow motion video of an auto accident is a threat???
And he wonders why no one takes him seriously.
Bernath you are a fraud and a liar with a massive dose of stupidity thrown on top.
I’m reposting this to be sure that those who read it are very aware that some lines should not be crossed.
On behalf of someone whom we all know and love, who is otherwise engaged:
“One of the regulars who has a reason for not commenting lately, is working on an awakening for Bernath and Wittgenfeld. Don’t think they thought of this.”
I realize that it’s rather amorphous in its nature, but I don’t believe it constitutes any sort of verifiable threat.
I interpret this as more like a surprise, like a giant wiggly plastic spider in your desk drawer, or pingpong balls sitting on mousetraps on the countertop.
I did not ask our absent friend to define what he meant by ‘awakening’, but have simply posted his message.
And this, as well: ‘Hey, nobady…. You are becoming to be famous, ENLOY’
It was an e-mail our absent friend received from DullAsAStick Whoopitup&Stepinit.
He’d like an interpretation, if anyone has one, and he wants to know what you’re drinking if you can understand it.
Thank you!
That is most likely his way of saying that he is now famous but, still becoming. Becoming what remains to be seen…Now imagine, all the *eyebleach* in the world. Hurst, huh? 😎
Let me guess – photos of them in pink assless chaps “coming out” at the PDX White Party?
Could be, Doc. Could be. LOL!
It’s late and I’m tired and that all made my head explode. This should be their theme song: Remember when you ran away and I got on my knees and begged you not to leave because I’d go berzerk? Well, you left me anyhow and the days got worse and worse and now you see I’ve gone completely out of my mind. And They’re coming to take me away Ha Ha They’re coming to take me away ho ho he he ha ha To the funny farm where life is beautiful all the time, and I’ll be happy to see those nice young men in their clean white coats And they’re coming to take me away ha ha You thought it was joke and so you laughed, you laughed when I had said that losing you would make me flip my lid, right? You know you laughed, I heard you laugh, you laughed, you laughed and laughed and then you left, but now you know I’m utterly mad. And they’re coming to take me away Ha Ha They’re coming to take me away ho ho he he ha ha To the happy home with trees and flowers and chirping birds and basket weavers who sit and smile and twiddle their thumbs and toes They’re coming to take me away ha ha… I cooked your food, I cleaned your house, and this is how you paid me back for all my kind unselfish loving deeds. Huh? Well you just wait they’ll find you yet, and when they do they’ll put you in the ASPCA you mangy mutt. And They’re coming to take me away Ha Ha They’re coming to take me away ho ho he he ha ha To the funny farm where life is beautiful all the time and I’ll be happy to see those nice men in their clean white coats They’re coming to take me away Ha Ha To the happy home with trees and flowers and chirping birds and basket weavers who sit and smile and twiddle thier thumbs and toes They’re coming to take me away… Read more »
Looks like Danny-boi won’t be asked back to “star” in any more episodes of Portlandia… I’m sure that the producers won’t be real happy with a gay-bashing, white male looking for a bit part.
As for Dullass, I’m sure that there are a few neighborhoods in his area where some of the local “brothers” would be more than happy to “enlighten” him on race relations.
Time to hang up your KKK hoods Danny and Dullass…
Lordy, lordy
Oh, and just in case anyone thought TSO’s title for this piece rang a bell . . . maybe it should.
Helluva tune.
Awesome sax work as well. It’s not often you hear a wah-wah on a saxaphone.
Chris Wood was indeed a good sax man. He used both electric and conventional sax on “Low Spark” – and he nailed it.
“Low Spark” is probably my all time favorite Traffic tune, and is easily one of my top-5 (and probably top-3) Winwood tunes overall.
Just wow; reading that made my eyes hurt. Weapons grade stupid.
And this is a perfect example of why some people should be involuntarily committed to a mental institution.
Guy is nuttier than a Payday bar.
When I think of Bernath and ShOrTbUs41 Windoew Lickers…I think of this…
I heard that Witless and Bernath were talking about that picture, Witless said “I wish I could do that!” and Bernath asked “Don’t you think you should pet him first?”
They are both batshit crazy, and you cannot reason with or negotiate with batshit crazies
In my completely unprofessional opinion of them based on their behavior here and elsewhere they are both significant threats to their own selves, and I am dumbfounded how they are not section 12’d.
These clowns tongue two-holes and tickle taint on the street corner at night for beer money.
Odd part: they do not even drink.
Go figure.
BREAKING NEWS:
Bernath is not, never was nor will he ever be a Genuine or Honorary CPO. PERIOD!
In a related story, MCPO and his legal team are monitoring this BREAKING STORY and are having difficulty maintaining a straight face!
I think old Dallas finally blocked me on his google plus account. Hah!
Does he TRY to be turbo-Wickre STUPID, or does it come to him naturally?
I’ll take “comes naturally” for the Daily Double, Proud Infidel. (smile)
Nah, it’s genetic… just like in Paulie (you know, the President and CEO of the Lucky Smegma Club)
I honestly think Witlessone is the stupidest one of all, though. Trying to force people into court to at least spend time and money fighting you is at least some sort of strategy, albeit a terrible one. Witlessone, though—Jesus. I think jumping on the clown car with the Project Camelot morons and trying to prove you guys were a front for the illuminati and were manufacturing secret rocket ships to take over the world takes the cake. I can’t link it because the SOB blocked me, but google “Dallas “LRP 41″ Wittgenfeld” as spelled and go back a ways. Spew warnings are in effect.
Monday, I plan to lodge a complaint against Bernath with both the Oregon Bar and the Florida Bar, to include forwarding the messages that he sent me. I will also be requesting his Bar number so that I can look into filing a harassment suit.
I wonder what the Florida Bar will do to him since he is claiming Florida residence and legal practice?
Flagwaver – his CA bar # is 116636
http://members.calbar.ca.gov/fal/Member/Detail/116636
Nail his ass to the wall on this shit
I’d suggest also reporting him to the California bar – that’s the only state in which he holds a license (or has ever been licensed, as far as I know).
I’m just curious why he’s using Marion County, Oregon deputies to supposedly deliver any court related documents?
After all, his address is in Washington County and yours is in another county.
Other than that get some Flagwaver!
I think that email gave me cancer….
The depths of depravity with this pair is pretty spectacular. Even simple logic escapes them, and forget about anything approaching common sense.
Wow, just wow.
Hey, hey, hey! I think I might have struck whatever the invertebrate uses as a nerve! He updated it site with what he thinks is a picture of my house and more pictures of my wife.
He seems to think that a picture of a house party of sorts where most of the furniture is in the other room to make space for more people means we are desperately poor.
I love the way he uses pictures of us working on our armor. Those things are used for charity purposes, to include appearances at Children’s Hospitals. I wonder how much he has done for charities?
If you want a laugh, here’s the link.
http://www.aspecialdayguide.com/itainthell/Ellenberg.htm
Flag – You and your wife are good people that have a good heart by the works that you both do. Bernasty doesn’t have the moral fiber to do anything resembling charity work. All he’s doing is looking for the next “gravy train” to try and get a ride on (Yelp! hasn’t been to receptive to his advances).
Nice yard man. My dogs wreck mine.
Just substitute Whitless and Bernasty for Ralph and Norton… getting in touch with their “closeted” side…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=stsnlTZG84Y
Huuuummmmnnnnnaaa… Huuuummmmnnnnnaaa… Huuuummmmnnnnnaaa
C’mon, guys – if you’re going to post links that are NSFW, please post a notice to that effect. We don’t want any TAH readers getting in trouble because they followed a link in the comments.
I stand corrected, Hondo…
Hey, I have to go back and add those warnings to my own links sometimes; no biggie. We just don’t want to get anyone in trouble for unknowingly following a link that’s not “workplace friendly”.
Oh Dear Me ….
Daniel-saaaaaaaan,
You’ve been quiet. Are you and sLuRp41 away on a honeymoon?
That was,,,,,,, like,,,,,,,, eeeeeewwwwwww!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
That, or he met up with Psul, Fwankenweenie, and SLURP41 for Land Nav Training via “Dutch Rudder Navigation”!
A bunch of jerks in a circle doing a circle jerk.
While looking at cheese porn.
****WARNING**** DO NOT GOOGLE “CHEESE PORN”….JUST DON’T….EVER
*Rustle rustle*
Has anyone heard anything more from these 2 clowns?
Over!
*Rustle*
Yes we have … We are ignoring them. However, Bernath is not, never was nor will he ever be a Genuine or Honorary CPO. PERIOD!
Hey Dan PUSSY
Guess who ELSE was just given an honor you will NEVER HAVE?!?!?
MCPON Names Gary Sinise Honorary Chief
http://www.navy.mil/submit/display.asp?story_id=69227