Friday feel good story
Well, Mark sends us today’s feel good story about the dumbest criminal on the face of the earth. 22-year old Derrick Mosley, walked into the Discount Gun Sales in Hillsboro, Oregon with a baseball bat to rob the place;
Sheriff’s deputies say Mosley walked into Discount Gun Sales on Southwest Beaverton-Hillsdale Highway around 4 p.m. Thursday with a bat in hand and smashed a display case.
But they say when Mosley tried to steal a gun, the store manager simply pulled out his own personal firearm and pointed it straight at the would-be-robber. The manager then yelled some orders at the guy and got him to drop the baseball bat, the gun he had tried to take and a nine-inch long knife he had on him.
When sheriff’s deputies arrived, they found Mosley on the floor being held at gunpoint by the manager.
Yeah, gee, I wonder what Discount Gun Sales sells.
Category: Feel Good Stories
Discount Guns….turning lives around one perp at a time
Can’t fix stupid.
Derp. Nothing more need be said.
So Jonn, I think we have disagreed on maybe one thing so far. Probably had something to do with the Army and or Navy. So let’s keep it that way. I agree “the dumbest criminal on the face of the earth” for sure!
I wonder when this will show up on TruTV’s World’s Dumbist?
I am sure he just wanted to get a closer look at the pistol and was like “Gee, there’s no one here to help me so I’ll just open the case myself.”
Or, that’s what his defense will be.
I can hear his homeboy telling him now ” Naw De-Mo’ I said to rob the BAT store with a GUN you dumb-ass %$#^V&!
At least he probably got clean underwear at the jail.
Perp must be needing medical care or a place to live. NOBODY is so brain-damaged as to attempt to rob a gun store with a baseball bat.
I’ve been there a couple of times. I was looking for parts for my M1911A1 and the owner said he had one that wasn’t working. I got the parts, but helped him fix his so all he needed was the parts I got.
Basically, the place is like a pawn shop for guns, but they also sell at lower prices and do some work (though, their tech is a joke).
As for the young man who was turning his life around to try out for the Mariners, I kind of wished he has lost a kneecap or something.
#9 – You haven’t met some of the ordinance guys I served with have you?
I see a Henry US Survival (AR-7) in that case. Neat little guns–I have one back home, though mine’s the older model without the top rail.
@11 Instinct, a young friend of mine works in Army EOD — and I think I’ve actually seen what you’re talking about. I agree.
To bad he didn’t kill home this would have been a good candidate for a Darwin Award
Damn. That is some serious stupid right there. Idiot is quite lucky he did not get some extra breathing holes.
‘Bama voter!
“I wanna rob a bank”
“With a bat? Aint gonna work, you’ll need a gun. Go steal a gun first”
“I see, sounds plausible I’ll be on my way then”
Oregon is a little squishy about self defense. Up here in Washington, at least on the East side, this numbnuts would have had so much lead in him he would not be able to carry all of it. Every gun store employee I know is armed and will shoot first. I can understand the clerks reluctance to fire on the guy once he had complied with the order to drop his weapons, what I’m saying is that here the clerks would have issued lead rather than orders.
Out here every gun store or range you walk into everyone working there is openly armed with at least one pistol, sometimes two, and various pokey-staby instruments. The most common carry I see is either the standard 1911 or M&P pistols. Not too many Glocks.
I’m already convinced he was TRYING for a Darwin Award. That boy had Weapons-Grade STUPID!!
This guy is like the perp I arrested for possession of drugs. As soon as I located the drugs in his right front pocket he exclaimed, “dee’s ain’t my pants dog!”
I’m sure that Discount Gun Sales sells a certain amount of chutzpah, among their other products.
He was just trying to obtain supplies for the New Black Panthers baseball team of homeless inner city orphans that he coaches down at Trayvon Martin Memorial field in Al Sharpton’s Race Grievance Park. (Sponsored by the Congressional Black Caucasians)
“Okay, here’s the plan. I walk into a gun store with a bat, break a display case, grab a gun, and out I go. I’m sayin’…what could possibly go wrong?”
I’m so glad that the bastard wasn’t shot, or we’d have to watch the poor shit on the news and the riots that’d follow.
Ok, so I’ve heard about it being dumb to bring a knife to a gunfight…. He brought a bat? WTF
#13 – PintoNag – yep, these are the guys who when a 1,000 lb bomb would need to be loaded would just get a bunch more people to lift it instead of using a bomb cradle just five feet away. Apparently it was too slow.
#17 – Jas, do you really think that this guy would know the word ‘plausible’ much less be able to use it in a sentence?
@9 Hate to break it to you but there are folks even dumber. I remember hearing of a a robbery at a GUN SHOW! This took place back in the late 70’s or early 80’s in IIRC Chicago. It was being held in a hotel. From the street to the ballroom where the show was being held there were a couple of plate glass windows with a view to the street. The four perps came in and held up the cashier outside the main hall. Everyone inside saw this go on but did nothing UNTIL one of the perps decided to “protect” themselves by sweeping their gun in a threatening motion to the assembled attendees and dealers.
Not a bright move as this happened to be a show devoted to CLASS 3 weapons. Needless to say the ATF and local constabulary inside the hall hit the deck as well as the cashier outside when the rocket scientists conducting the hold up made their move for a veritable fusillade erupted. The final “box” score was 4 perps dead, the “Jeinus” gunman and one of his compatriots in the foyer, as well as one man who managed to make it outside and the poor sod in the getaway car which looked like finely aged Swiss cheese. Needless to say there was an inquiry and at the end of it all there was an inquiry to which all of the members of the show who opened fire claimed they were threatened with deadly force and defended themselves duly (if with a bit more elan than may have been required). The authorites accepted this and all that was needed to take care of everything was for a payment of the damages done at the hotel which was done with a collection taken up by the participants.
@27
Yeah you might be right, I was overexpecting…
Thanks to all of you for making my Saturday morning. It’s oh-dark-too-damn-early, so I had suppress rather them guffaw out loud. I ran into some dumb-assery in yesterday’s email, which primed the laughter pump. This just was SO over the top, again, thanks.
The only thing that would have made this better is if the perp had threatened the clerk, and clerk had had to ventilate the perp to his ultimate demise.
Ladies and gentlemen, meet Run-DMC’s “slow” cousin: One-DMF.
no dumpster in back of the store?