I’ve lost Artoo!
The new Terminator movie premiered Friday. Yeah…I sort of figured that whole thing had played out around the time Linda Hamilton turned into Mickey Rourke with breasts. But apparently, in keeping with Hollywood’s penchant for recycling old plots by hiring the cast of Hannah Montana and throwing an Obama-load of money into CGI, killer robots are back, sans Governor Arnold Taxandspender.
9v battery and 5.56mm link belt not included
With that in mind, I ran across an article this morning discussing the real life robots currently in use with US armed forces in the Middle East. Packbots and Talon robotic units are apparently working alongside troops in-theater, taking out IED’s and helping grunts carry all their crap…like TSO’s autographed copy of Abba’s Greatest Hits…shit like that. So when the Brookings Institute did a study on the effects of these pre-Terminator helpers on their human counterparts, it came as a surprise that doggies have an affinity for the clankers. Cast your optical receptors on this chunk of data:
One EOD soldier brought in a robot for repairs with tears in his eyes and asked the repair shop if it could put “Scooby-Doo” back together. Despite being assured that he would get a new robot, the soldier remained inconsolable. He only wanted Scooby-Doo.
The article cited some expert who says that soldiers develop an emotional attachment to the machines that they’ve dragged with them into battle. There are accounts of soldiers risking their lives to retrieve these robots which have been incapacitated during combat. One account had an EOD soldier running 164 feet under heavy small arms fire to save his robot that had been knocked out by enemy fire. There’s also accounts of units awarding “Purple Hearts” to these machines and one of them being given a military funeral. Hmm.
At first blush, I was sort of taken aback, but the more I considered it, the more it struck home. We’ve grown up with automatons like R2-D2, Commander Data and Algore, embracing their near human emotions, and responding to them when they’re hurt or confused or can’t identify our Founding Fathers. We find them alluring, intriguing and in some cases, frightening. I mean seriously, if we can love our cars, I guess it’s only natural that a remote controlled engine of death armed with 40mm grenade launchers or a SWORDS package can give you a stiffy.
Far be it from me to criticize any of this…I mean, I can’t seem to let go of my 1991 Honda Civic with 200k miles on it…but I guess I’m concerned about the humanization of these robots to the point that flesh and blood soldiers are willing to run into enemy fire to save them. Isn’t the purpose of these beasties to reduce casualties? Can’t speak to the mind of a soldier in the field who has attached himself to one of these robots, but I imagine it’s not exactly healthy. Especially when you know that given the opportunity, these mechanical helpers are just a couple virus updates away from creating their own society where humans are slaughtered or enslaved as a power source ala The Matrix…not that I’m buying that Keanu Reeves’ brain has enough electricity to power a vibrating sex toy, much less an entire Erector set (no pun intended) world…but I digress.
On a weekend where we honor the men and women who’ve shed their life’s blood in defense of Liberty and everything that’s good about our nation, I suppose one day, we may have to add C3PO to the list of the honored dead. Rust in peace, soldier.
Category: Politics
We’ve grown up with automatons like R2-D2, Commander Data and Algore….
Dude, that is a classic line.
Man, you owe me a new keyboard because the Algore line…
I offered to destroy a disabled EOD-bot in Baghdad in 2007. We had been invited down to that sector with a tease of getting to blow-up a VBIED factory with Hellfire missiles. Instead, they (the pronoun people) elected to send in the EOD-bot to rig it with explosives. Half way back from the house, the EOD-bot blew a fuze. The house went boom, everybody ooh’d and ahh’d at the cool mushroom cloud, and we volunteered to whack the EOD-bot as a consolidation prize. No dice, EOD wasn’t too thrilled with our offer.
Thats a M240 so 5.56 link wouldnt work
Couldn’t find a pic of the package that mounts the M249, so I went with what I could find…hell, I’m not even sure that’s a Talon chassis…it could be from a video game as far as I know.
“…package can give you a stiffy.” ROTFLMAO!!
You’re good.