In the time of chimpanzees I was a Bernath….

| May 8, 2014

Bottom Line Up Front:

Unlawful practice of law in Florida is a third degree felony.

Wittgenfeld authorizes Bernath to be his attorney in pursuit of a law suit to be filed in Florida.

Bernath claims to be pro hac vice, although he has never filed.

Pro hac vice is not available to attorneys living in Florida not a member of that states bar.

Bernath has repeatedly claimed to be a Florida resident, and availed himself of homestead exemptions only available to Florida residents.

Florida law:

Engaging in the unlicensed practice of law in Florida is also a crime. It is a third degree felony. For this reason, the State Attorney also has the power to bring criminal charges against an individual for practicing law without a license.

Bernath’s Florida client, Dallas Wittgenfeld, April 19, 2014:

Dear Esquire Daniel Bernath,

I consent to you representing me. Per the discussion, I want you to take the Defendants Seavey and Lilyea off every email, as I do not wish to have knowledge of them or any communication.  Please do not copy me with any email to Seavey of Indiana or Lilyea of W.Va.

I don’t wish to converse with them, and they are actors in a Florida law suite coming up.  They need to find their own representation. I wish nothing to do with either of them. However as we sue them, in future suits you can correspond with their defensive counsel or however this all plays out.

Please sever all your email links between me as the Plaintiff and the American Legion as Defendant, including the agents of the American Legion. I want no contact with the Defendants, and you will make it so, as I form the entire array of complaints against them, their agency and every legal issue, that is well-documented.

I think the young millennials well know the hard road that they have picked. So I agree, we find and perfect the RICO statute, as to riding on Meaghan’s Law for cyber bullying the combat disabled war Veterans as these military people are a pox, a tumor to be removed from the ranks of Americas military and Veterans’ Service club cyber/mob society.

You are the lawyer and leave me out if it, to the Defendants. I will pursue everything legally and properly though. The American Legion’s “Stolen Valor Reich” have no idea as to what will happen to them. Perhaps in the future the millennial soldiers will be more careful about attacking  strangers who are really combat disabled Vietnam War Veterans of the Special Forces trained elite Airborne Rangers (LRRP).

Bernath’s Florida client, Dallas Wittgenfeld discussing his lawyer:

Wtiigenfeld bernath

Bernath’s Florida client, Dallas Wittgenfeld discussing his lawyer:

Stop it iPredator Seavey.  I see here where you are trying to spook old Bernath…

You are wasting your time, idiot.   My lawyer is the best in central Florida you and the American Legion are screwed.

Now shut up and stop cabooky dancing like you are a crusader or something, but have no weapons.

Daniel Bernath on his unlawful practice of law in Florida

Pro hoc vice [sic]

Pro Hac Vice from Wiki (for those who don’t know what it means):

Pro hac vice (American English pronunciation: [pr?? hæk ‘vi:t?ei]), Latin: “for this occasion” or “for this event” (literally, “for this turn”),[1] is a legal term usually referring to a lawyer who has not been admitted to practice in a certain jurisdiction but has been allowed to participate in a particular case in that jurisdiction.

RULE 4-5.5 UNLICENSED PRACTICE OF LAW; MULTIJURISDICTIONAL PRACTICE OF LAW

(b) Prohibited Conduct. A lawyer who is not admitted to practice in Florida shall not:
(1) except as authorized by other law, establish an office or other regular presence in Florida for the practice of law;

(2) hold out to the public or otherwise represent that the lawyer is admitted to practice law in Florida; or

(3) appear in court, before an administrative agency, or before any other tribunal unless authorized to do so by the court, administrative agency, or tribunal pursuant to the applicable rules of the court, administrative agency, or tribunal.

Comment to the rule:

Other than as authorized by law, a lawyer who is not admitted to practice in Florida violates subdivision (b) if the lawyer establishes an office or other regular presence in Florida for the practice of law. Presence may be regular even if the lawyer is not physically present here. Such a lawyer must not hold out to the public or otherwise represent that the lawyer is admitted to practice law in Florida.

Requirements for Pro Hac Vice from Florida Bar:

6. Movant is not disbarred or suspended from practice in any jurisdiction.

7. Movant is not a Florida resident.

Email from Daniel A. Bernath, titled “From plaintiff Daniel A. Bernath”, dated March 11, 2014:

I am suing each and every person who defamed me.  As I am a citizen of the US and of Florida it shall be in Florida US District Court.

Email from April 18 (and dozens of others):

Daniel A. Bernath
Lawyer
4600 Summerlin
Suite C-2  #249
Ft Myers Florida 33919

Email from Bernath, April 22:

Oregon Bar is unhappy because Bernath has been practicing law in Oregon with a California license, made several million dollars since 1994 (depriving Oregon lawyers of those fees) and there is nothing they can do about it but write Bernath “caution” letters long after he moved to Florida.

Email from Bernath, May 7:

 You pick a fight with a service connected PTSD agent orange 100 per cent 65 year old retired in Florida living on exempted Pension and 100 per cent homestead exemption. Attorney Bernath has all the time to defend and prosecute.

And, because irony is not his strong suit, I give you the pièce de résistance …Email to the Indiana Bar Association, May 8, 2014:

  To: Discipline Indiana Bar

Your bar member Mark C. Seavey is violating and promises to continue to violate Rule 8.4.  His misconduct is also an abuse of process.

He has conducted a campaign to harass myself, a 64 Vietnam War Veteran and other older Vietnam War Veterans by any means possible through his website  www.ThisAintHell.us.  He has done this by threatening my life, encouraging others to threaten my life, making sport of my service connected disability, all because he is on a campaign to attack aged Vietnam War Veterans.

Because of my service in Vietnam, I ingested poison. Now, I cannot urinate. I must now insert a rubber catheter up my penis, past my prostate gland and into my bladder. This is very painful and must be done 6 to 8 times a day as my kidneys were failing if not attended to immediately.  This of course, has contributed to my treated and stable at the moment severe depression and post traumatic stress disorder.

Mark C. Seavey, along with his death threats and his directing others to make death threats to me, then sends me messages, calling me “crazy pants”, in obvious reference to my mental difficulties because of the Vietnam War and my inability to urinate.  (Crazy-my PTSD and severe depression and crazy pants-my requirement that I conduct a medical procedure 6 to 8 times a day to stay alive as I approach my 65th year.)

I have begged your bar member repeatedly to leave me alone.  My family members have repeatedly begged him to leave our family alone and he has only responded with more encouragement to his associates to continue the harassments

 

 

Category: Politics

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HS Sophomore

“I must now insert a rubber catheter up my penis, past my prostate gland and into my bladder. This is very painful and must be done 6 to 8 times a day…” And that, people, is why we have brain bleach.

A Proud Infidel®™

Next he’ll be saying he has to put a vibrator up his ass so he can go shit!!

Gravel

Don’t laugh, they make those just for that.

A Proud Infidel®™

Yeah, but do those who have to use them yell “*WHEEEEE!* *WHOOOPEEE!!*” while using one, like it’s rumored that Daniel A. Bernath the phony CPO does?

Gravel

More like, “FIIIIIIIINALLY POOOOOOPIE.”

Ok, probably getting into the TMI realm.

Gravel

Someday, maybe in the near future on a weekend open thread, I will regale you all with a story about pooping while paralyzed. True story too.

That Guy

Fun fact: That happens to some old people, and it’s not because they were exposed to ‘poison’, which Bernath most certainly was not. There are a MYRIAD of causes for prostate issues. Here’s a list of things that the VA recognizes may be caused by Agent Orange: http://www.publichealth.va.gov/exposures/agentorange/conditions/index.asp

On that list, you will notice ‘Prostate Cancer’, which, in fact, can cause issues that would require a catheter to relieve. However, once again, you can have those issues without Agent Orange, and, in fact, most people with prostate cancer were never exposed to the ‘poison’ that Bernath, hereafter referred to as ‘jackass’, claims exposure to. Jackass would also do well to note that there are people from World War II (or rather, were people, as they have mostly died) who had such issues entirely without exposure to such chemicals, and there are even young people who have prostate cancer (although this is fairly rare).
As an aside, I thought you had to actually have a dick and balls to get prostate cancer.
ZING motherfucker. Zing.

Sparks

That Guy…”As an aside, I thought you had to actually have a dick and balls to get prostate cancer.”

Way to be, way to go my man!!! 😀 ROTFLMAO

James in Gulf Breeze

eyebleach.com

MustangCryppie

Oh, yes! Very nice!

Sparks

Thank God he spelled it out for us! Because I thought for sure he was putting the catheter up his nose into his brain pan and relieving himself of his much needed and in short supply brain cells. Whew!

HS Sophomore, I’ll be joining you now in the laundry room for what is becoming my daily TAH dose of brain bleach. For which I DO insert a catheter up my nose. (Better results that way fellas. You gotta try it sometime.)

Ex-PH2

He says: ‘Because of my service in Vietnam, I ingested poison’.

What he is literally saying is that he ate or drank, and swallowed, a toxic substance with no reference to exactly what that substance is. The definition of poison is ‘a substance that through its chemical action usually kills, injures, or impairs an organism’.

He doesn’t specify what substance he defines as ‘poison’, but it is generally accepted that poison has an immediate effect that is visible to the user, and is not something that is drawn out over several decades.

A little loose with the vocabulary there, he is.

Nicki

I now need a bath in boiling Listerine after reading that.

Flagwaver

This guy is trying to be coo coo for cocoa puffs while standing over a bowl of fruit loops.

Mike220

Danny Boi the Turd Burgler and DuLlAsS the Turd Burgled sure make a lovely couple here.

Thanks Danny Boi for proof you have your head up your ass. I’m guessing you’ve stuck your catheter a little too far up Little Bernasty and you’ve poked through somewhere and hit your brain.

That Guy

His name is Slurp 41. GET IT RIGHT.
lol

Mike220

Roger that!

A Proud Infidel®™

I thought it was BuTtSlUrP41?!

Sparks

I’ll go for CaThEtErSlUrP41. 😀

Kinda old ET1

+1
Perfect!

Mike220

LoNeLyRuMpRaNgErPaTrOl41

LebbenB

Hey – Dullass was NEVER a Ranger.

Hondo

LebbenB: actually, he served with a Ranger unit in combat in Vietnam as an 05B RTO. That may be one of his few “claims to fame” that is completely legit.

I guess that wasn’t enough for WitLessOne, though.

A Proud Infidel®™

Nope, RTO wasn’t enough for him, he had to add “Trail Assassin” among other things to his resume! The wind always gets heavy whenever Witlessfart and Bernutless are near each other because one SUCKS and the other BLOWS!

LebbenB

He’s still a tabless POS.

Hondo

That much is IMO true. Both parts.

HMCS(FMF) ret

To paraphrase Ricky Ricardo,

“Danny-boi, you have some ‘splainin to do”

Danny has never been, is not or never will be a honorary or genuine CPO… and Hamilton Burger has a better record as an attorney that you do…

MAJMike

Sweet! I love the old Perry Mason reference.

That said, ol’ Danny risks seeing his little Social Security scam being slammed.

HS Sophomore

Remind me agin, by the way-what exactly do Bernath’s nonexistent injuries have to do with any of this?

ChipNASA

He just wants everyone to know that he likes to play with himself 6 to 8 times a day.

Sparks

I knew it! Standing in the latrine, touching himself! Oh the pleasures!

By the way, besides, oils, fuels and other such stuff as may be found on a ship, what “chemical” is he claiming to have been exposed to which causes his disability? Not a Navy guy here so help me out. Can photography chemicals do such, I don’t think so. Since he was not on the “ground” in Vietnam (like the man he impersonated in his photo) what else could he have come into contact with?

As an aside, shit, cum and saliva from “man on man” contact, doesn’t count. /sarc/

(The “/sarc/” is there for you Bernath, since in all your defamatory postings of others (which have ALL been screen captured for future reference and evidence) which you tried to absolve yourself of by using the term “Sarcasm”. Works both ways or not at all.)

rb325th

In one of the e-mails listed above he claims to have been exposed to Agent Orange. Now while this is indeed possible for numerous Navy Personnel in Vietnam, and and onboard ships, it was a very specific list of ships and at specific times.
Gues which two ships someone was on, but are not on the official list of vessels the VA uses to determine AO Exposure?

Ex-PH2

Oh, I dunno…. would that be USS Olive Oyl?

A Proud Infidel®™

Maybe he thinks he once walked near a sealed barrel of the stuff, thus he SAYS he’s been exposed?

Sparks

rb325th…Thanks for clearing that up. So he was not on a ship listed by the VA as a possible source of Agent Orange? Who would have guessed.

Mr. Blue

He got exposed when he, DuLlAsS 41 and Visconti flew a Space Shuttle mission to rescue Gen. Westmoreland’s daughter from Fu Manchu’s orbital fortress.

Hondo

I heard it was when he flew with Flash Gordon to rescue his lady from Ming the Merciless . . . .

GDContractor

There was the wedding of Ross Perot’s daughter with guys in black pajamas hopping over the fence…or did I dream that up?

HS Sophomore

While capturing Vietnamese Command Master Colonel Ho Lee Fuk

ChipNASA

” How do We hate thee? Let us count the threads.
We hate thee to the depth and breadth and height
Our keyboards can reach, when feeling out of sight of drinks, lest we spew
For the ends of the Internet and ideal God’s Grace.
We hate thee to the level of everyday’s
Most insane your posts by sun and candle-light.
We hate thee freely, as men and women of TAH strive for Right;
We hate thee purely, as we turn from Praise.
We hate thee with a passion put to use
In your unending queefs, and with our brotherhood and sisterhood’s faith.
We hate thee with a hate We seem to not lose
With your endless desire to be a giant taint, — We hate thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, detritus of all your threads! — and, if God choose,
We shall but love thee better and more after your final departure.

/With apologies to Lizzy B.

Ex-PH2

ChipNASA, Will Shakespeare loves stuff like that. Kudos.

B Woodman

BRAVO! BRAVO!
I bow before a Master!

10% Truth

What an asshole. I’d pay good money to be a fly on the wall if this human szmegma ever got this into a courtroom. I feel bad laughing at someone so mentally deficient, but holy hell, does this guy not have any handlers than can reign him in & put him back in his padded room?

JAGC

I wonder if he lists a phony lawyer as sponsoring counsel for the pro hac vice claim.

I still think among everything else, he’s violating ethical rules re: retainer agreements and power of attorney. Even a crappy mall attorney is risking his/her license by sponsoring this clown pro hac vice.

Old Trooper

See; I was right, in the other thread, when I suspected that Wittgenfeld was writing those emails, because he and Bernath have similar writing styles. My conclusion; that when a person is weapons grade crazy, they tend to write like others that are weapons grade crazy, is spot on.

That Guy

Come now, Old Trooper. Your theory has been proven with an exceedingly small sample size. We need more crazies to prove anything concerning your conclusion.
However, one would think that a mental (or moral) disorder or disability that lead one to steal valor would have roots in, if not the same cause, than at least somewhat similar cuases.

Bill

This is just WOW!!! He’s a judge too. He was a Nobel Winner for Literature in 2010. WOW.

He happens to be the best in his own mind.

http://www.aspecialdayguide.com/bernathresume.htm

You know that he was nominated as a Distinguished Officer of the United States Department of Homeland Security? WOW!!

As a photographer too!!!

Think you got a REAL SECRET Squirrel here…or wait…he’s just real NUTTY!!!

Sparks

Bill…Heads up next time please. 😀 I looked at that page and those bumpy, zitty, shingle thingies scared hell out of me! 😀

Fjardeson

That web site looks like it was designed by a 6 year old – in 1996.

MustangCryppie

Oh, God! THAT is CLASSIC! The machinations of a friggin’ psychotic.

CATM

Someone owes me for my breakfast and coffee that I just puked up. I’m going to go drink draino now and hope that the last few minutes are erased from my memory.

Jonn Lilyea

That letter from Wittgenfeld looks to be the same one that Wickre sent Bernath, but edited slightly. He left out the fact that he’s a Soviet helicopter though (a Hoplite?).

Bobo

I was thinking the same thing. I wonder if Birdbath is sending form letters to his “clients” and having them send the letters back to him? I wonder why Psul isn’t having everyone sued in Maryland, other then the fact that every jurist there knows that he is also bat nuts crazy.

HS Sophomore

Sheesh, if you’re going to plagiarize, you might at least swipe Giduck’s ranting screeds. He could at least speak English.

Mustang2LT

“What?”
“ENGLISH! DO YOU SPEAK IT, MOTHERFUCKER?!”
“What?”
“SAY WHAT AGAIN MOTHERFUCKER! SAY WHAT ONE MORE GODDAMNED TIME! I DARE YOU! I DOUBLE DARE YOU! ”

And on and on. What we need is Samuel L. Jackson up in this place!

LebbenB

Nothing beats a quote from the mushroom cloud laying motherfucker himself.

Flagwaver

Yeah, I noticed the patented “as to” crop up more than once in the responses there.

Hondo

He left out the fact that he’s a Soviet helicopter though (a Hoplite?).

I was thinking more “Hind”, Jonn – as in “hind end”. Just seems more apropos to me.

Ex-PH2

That letter is almost identical to the letter psulie-o the uncoolie-o sent to bernutsless a few weeks ago. It isn’t Whipitnflogit’s style. He’s too far gone as a resident of ToonTown to be coherent enough to write anything close to that.

He’s going to file a ‘suite’, eh? A suite is something like an business address in an office building, or a residential address in a multi-unit owner-occupant building – something like that. It can also be a musical composition. It has other uses, as well. I’m unfamiliar with law ‘suites’, per se.

But the address bernitwit has listed as his is not a residential address. The place closes at 10PM.

That Guy

I hope it’s a suite at a Hilton hotel. Some of those get pretty swank.
And if I could have that suite be in Vegas, all the better.

Ex-PH2

That Guy, I would join you in five seconds.

A Proud Infidel®™

If it’s in Texas, it could have ‘ol “Blobfish” Chevalier for night security, in which case you just fling a glazed jelly doughnut into the air and do as you please while he runs to get it! Hell, you could also start a betting pool AS TO how fast he can fetch it, and is sounds like a GREAT way to dispose of stale day-old leftovers!!

Poetrooper

TSO, I confess to confusion regarding all the supposed litigation this supposed lawyer is supposedly filing. I thought he’d just filed a multi-defendant civil action in Oregon, yet we now see he’s holding himself out publicly as a practicing lawyer and a ‘citizen” of Florida. The latter clearly sets him up as a target for prosecution under Florida statutes, but just where the hell is this legal nomad physically: Florida, Oregon, California or elsewhere?

A concise overview of this situation might be helpful, starting with Bernath’s initial appearance on TAH, his links to other SV phonies and all of the supposed legal action he has undertaken against TAH, its owners and followers. Such a summary might prove helpful if provided to state attorneys’ general offices in every state where this fool has held himself out as an attorney. No?

GDContractor

IP addresses in his various email headers, and IP addresses from his various posts here would help fill in a few of those blanks.

GDContractor

I suspect his statement about 100% homestead expemption in Florida is bullshit. Follow me:

“Comes now Plaintiff, Daniel A. Bernath, for himself and as assignee of the Oregon Trail Trust and complaining against Defendants and all of them, states as follows:” from http://www.aspecialdayguide.com/ctsw.htm

And now to Lee County FL. tax district website:
“Owner of Record: BERNATH NICOLE OI-EN WONG TR
FOR OREGON TRAIL TRUST
1319 KINGSWOOD CT
FORT MYERS FL 33919”
http://www.leepa.org/Display/DisplayParcel.aspx?FolioID=10193950&SalesDetails=True#SalesDetails

No doubt that it is our Bernath, his wife is last named “Wong”. The house is owned for his daughter (I am guessing) by the Trust and there are no senior, or disability exemptions in place. Looks like the homestead exemption will go away next year maybe. Looks like they bought the house in April of this year. If you look closely at the picture, you can see a quivering bush. Clicking on the aerial viewer leads me to conclude that The Fake CPO resides neither on the beachfront, or on a golf course. Life is so cruel.

Nice monkey cage attached to the back of the house though.

GDContractor

4600 Summerlin, his rental mailbox (and the location of the pallet of potting soil), is 1.7 miles to the N of his residence. That is convenient.

Hondo

Nice looking place.

Wonder if Yelp knows about it?

GDContractor

Damn shame if a Yelp “employee” … or say, a process server …slipped on a puddle of monkey urine while approaching the door, or tripped over a loose catheter. I guess they would have no remedy other than to sue The Oregon Trail Trust. Hypothetically, of course.

HMCS(FMF) ret

Any way to find out what type of trust it is?

Paul H. Lemmen

He has also, by publishing libelous statements online, opened himself to criminal prosecution in the State of Florida. Florida has a very strong statute concerning criminal libel (a felony of the second degree, punishable by up to 15 years incarceration per instance).
836.05 Threats; extortion.—Whoever, either verbally or by a written or printed communication, maliciously threatens to accuse another of any crime or offense, or by such communication maliciously threatens an injury to the person, property or reputation of another, or maliciously threatens to expose another to disgrace, or to expose any secret affecting another, or to impute any deformity or lack of chastity to another, with intent thereby to extort money or any pecuniary advantage whatsoever, or with intent to compel the person so threatened, or any other person, to do any act or refrain from doing any act against his or her will, shall be guilty of a felony of the second degree, punishable as provided in s. 775.082, s. 775.083, or s. 775.084.
See: http://www.flsenate.gov/Laws/Statutes/2011/Chapter836/All

Paul H. Lemmen

As I am a 1st time poster (though an avid reader) and in the interest of full disclosure, you may find the basic information about my despicable past here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paul_H._Lemmen
Mostly accurate only minor errors. I admitted guilt and served 36 months of a 42 month sentence. I will always state what my past is and accept whatever scorn comes my way. I am a pariah through my own actions. I alone am responsible for my actions both past and present. Thank you. (If the folks that operate this blog desire to ban me, I shall follow their wishes and withdraw).

MCPO NYC USN Ret.

This is my vote:

GFY! My grandfather was one of the first IRA men to walk out of Beggars Bush in uniform in 1922 as a Sgt Major. Before that he was a plain clothes Dublin Brigade and Squad member. My grandmother was in Collin’s intel network in Cork.

They both met in Kenmare as my grandfather fought in and held Cork as a young and respected member of the Dublin Guard.

Take your phony IRA story else where!

And KMRIA!

Paul H. Lemmen

Thank you, I shall withdraw. Please delete my initial comment but please leave the second so all may know my crimes.

MCPO NYC USN Ret.

My feelings are summed up in this short but inspirational video demonstrating triumph over oppression:

Sparks

Well…it’s easy to see who the smart one in that video is. Maybe we should have him go after Procol Harem instead. I mean 15 seconds and he has his finger on the trigger and firing at the right people. You can’t ask for better than that.

Ex-PH2

What Sparks said! I want to hire that chimp. Damn good aim! He figured that thing out in 5 seconds.

MCPO NYC USN Ret.

And another … proving that YES monkeys can run a courtroom!

Nicki

I am literally sitting here playing this shit over and over again, laughing.

ChipNASA

I thought they said “D-Bags” and I just about wet myself.

/teabagging Bernath works for me too.

ChipNASA

Works for Cheesedick as well…..

Jonn Lilyea

And I’m sure the Indiana Bar is excited to read about the status of Bernath’s urination habits.

Gravel

Just remember that if he tries to shake your hand in court.

Sparks

Gravel…Uhm…the horror, the horror.

MCPO NYC USN Ret.

Speaking of that Jonn …

Breaking News: Monkey Lawyer Becomes Very Thirsty

(NSFA – NOT SAFE FOR ANYWHERE)

Hondo

Now, what was that ending line from the “Most Interesting Man In the World” commercials . . . ? (smile)

MCPO NYC USN Ret.

Monkey Lawyer Videos are Awesome!

ChipNASA

Monkey Lawyer Bernath and his “Discovery” process…..

Aysel

Apes on the brain today MCPO? ^_^

Flagwaver

Okay, you knuckleheads. Stop monkeying around and get back to work.

A Proud Infidel®™

Meh, he alleges he has that wrong with him along with his pain fits, but he’s still fit enough to fly an airplane?

DOES NOT COMPUTE…

Hey Daniel A. Bernath, phony CPO and phony Oregon Attorney, DON’T WORRY about that stupid fuel level, just take off one more time, obey the Gremlins in your head!!!

Gravel

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Sooooo much crazy to make fun of, soooo so so so much crazy. Especially the whole crazy bladder/catheterization part. Ooohh man, I’m literally a “fountain” of paralyzed urine jokes.

Ex-PH2

Unless he’s found a source for rubber hoses, he’s full of crap. Catheters are made of latex, silicone or polyurethane. And the product is designed to be painless unless, of course, you have penile cancer or a priapism. 🙂

Gravel

I know all about the process. Trust me it’s not painless. Most catheter “kits” (if you get them as a kit) have a sterile numbing agent you use internally, so to speak, first.

Bulletbrother

He needs to insert a tube up his ass and drain out all of that bullshit before he chokes on it. I can’t wait for this to go to court so he can look like a fool to so many people in the legal system that the next time he tries to sue anyone they laugh at him and tell him to get the hell out.

HS Sophomore

I’m getting vibes that those tubes that draw out Birdbath’s bodily wastes are hooked up to the wrong end again.

NHSparky

Why is it I’m thinking of the medical office scene in Idiocracy when you posted that?

A Proud Infidel®™

I’d say he needs to insert a drainage tube in the side of his HEAD to let some of that shit out, but I’m sure it’s under so much pressure, his head would explode like an over-pressurized steam boiler at the least bit of a poke!

HS Sophomore

I think at this point that Bernath deserves his own category on the blog.

A Proud Infidel®™

I thought that at one time, this site’s Admin DID make Bernath his own category?

Hondo

Check the site’s categories. (smile)

Nicki

YES!!!!

OWB

Whoopsiwhitsit already established that category of very special loonyhood. Nutsybern has worked diligently to join him. Took him a while, but he finally attained that illusive yet utterly awesome plateau of goofy nutzoid almost human status of interplanetary void.

Good thing we have plenty of vinegar on hand. Liberal sprays of the vinegar around the compound should protect us from contamination from the dab lt while keeping those contrails at bay.

(Will someone please pass the tinfoil hat of the day. Was it cammo today? I forgot.)

2/17 Air Cav

The guy is beyond belief. What a mess. He puts the hyper in hyperbole and plays coloroforms with photos, inviting ridicule–and that claims injury due to….ridicule. Then, he doubles down by wishing painful death by cancer to one or more persons here, pours email after email and comment after comment from his bowels for weeks and weeks and then claims more injury when the responses he triggered come his way. It’s like jumping in front of a car multiple times and then suing the car’s driver (if not the manufacturer and seller)–despite the fact that the attempts to effect injury were videotaped. Just unbelievable.

Jonn Lilyea

If “cabooky dancing” means helping lunatics connect across the interwebz, This Ain’t Hell does that very well and I see no need to stop.

Nicki

Are we sure he doesn’t mean bukkake (or however the fuck you spell it)?

overthehillranger

A continuous demonstration of the concealment art of anal defilade

Farflung Wanderer

Dear God, it’s a circlejerk of posers. I swear, they just feed off each other’s imaginary lives to create their own little reality.

The sooner these people realize that they have about as much standing in the court of law as a four-tabled leg with only one leg left, the better.

“Stolen Valor Reich”… Pfeh. Chip, you’re absolutely right; these guys are Maroons. I prefer my own little word, though: Panass!

Farflung Wanderer

I immediately regret looking at this page.

Time to wipe my computer’s history… Again.

HMCS(FMF) ret

FW – please be sure to stop by the TAH Gift Shop for your complimentary gift basket that has 5 gallons of brain bleach and 14 SOS pads…

Ex-PH2

I’d love to take a brief look, but my computer already had one cleanup job this year. Doesn’t need another.

GDContractor

In regards to his post about NASA, WTF is a “secret clearance computer”. Dude’s an idiot.

LebbenB

it’s like a poser version of “Centipede.”

gitarcarver

TSO’s statement on what the law reads is copied from the Florida Bar site. (Not that that is a bad thing.)

For the actual Florida Statutes on lawyers and their practices, that is covered by FS 454, in case anyone wants to read it. The non-lawyers practicing law is 454.23)

http://www.flsenate.gov/Laws/Statutes/2012/Chapter454/All

Stick Stickly

A classic case of narcissistic personality disorder. I just spent the last hour reading through the madness that is Bernath’s website. Even though I’d seen it mentioned quite a bit previously, I finally decided to take a look.

http://www.aspecialdayguide.com/bernathresume.htm

It is the saddest thing I’ve seen in some time.

rfisher

What’s really funny about that debacle of a website is that he has the photo-shopped picture of him in uniform right beside the picture from which he copied his empty melon head. Teh stoopid runs strong and deep in that guy.

RM3(SS)

I wonder if the retainer agreement includes Psul (of the ballsack) and DullAss taking turns with the “insertion” technique? One holds, the other pushes. A nice daisy chain of poser love!

Bobo

Now, that is some classic submarine humor right there.

NHSparky

The three of them would have been a fucking laugh riot on Halfway Night.

COB: “Okay, boys, the next pie is a special one, cause it doesn’t have the cherry in it, it’s got a TDU weight in it! What’s the opening bid?”

At that point every nuke would reenlist and pool their SRB checks for that one.

gitarcarver

From one of the emails:

as to riding on Meaghan’s Law for cyber bullying….

Is this a reference to Megan’s Law? A law dealing with the registration of sexual offenders in areas that has nothing to do with cyber stalking as they claim?

Wow. Just wow.

Stick Stickly

I believe they are referring to the Megan Meier Cyberbullying Prevention Act (H.R. 1966, 111th Congress).

I don’t think that actually went through, though.

That Guy

No, it didn’t. The Megan Meier act was filled with vaguely defined terms, which is fine when you’re a jackass like Bernath or Slurp 41, but not a good idea when you’re trying to pass a law which you may use to put someone in jail.
Not to say the Megan Meier story isn’t a sad one, by the way, but the fact that Bernath and Slurp somehow identify with Megan Meier, who had done little wrong other than offend a mother’s daughter, is hilarious. They’ve lied. They’ve attempted to cash in on valor they didn’t deserve in various ways, even if those ways aren’t provably for financial gain. They’re not the ‘victims’ of anything but their own dishonesty.

gitarcarver

Stick Sitckly,

Thanks for the clarification. You are correct that the bill never made it out of committee.

Even so, after reading the bill I am not sure that it would have applied.

Thanks again.

Stick Stickly

Anytime, gitarcarver. Frankly, it makes things all the more pathetic when Dullass is referencing a dead bill in an impotent attempt to- what, exactly- intimidate? Demonstrate legal prowess? Or even more sad, as “That Guy” pointed out, that he somehow identifies our outing of his false claims with the bullying of a little girl.

Ex-PH2

There’s something else. Life insurance policies in general exclude suicide from coverage for a death benefit payout.

So if either of these bozos even implies that he’s thinking of offing himself, any coverage they might be expecting is null and void.

John R

Not always. SGLI pays out if cause of death is suicide. Other insurance companies usually have some form of grace period before they’ll pay. MetLife’s was two years after policy purchase. Off yourself after that, and payment is made.

LebbenB

Awesome sauce! Complete and total awesome sauce. You DID get those emails from the Duffel Blog, didn’t you? No? Those are for real…Wooooooow. He’s a special kind of different. And a LIAR. And A FAKE.

Nice Beck reference, TSO. That’s one of my favorites from him.

Hondo

In case anyone was wondering:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YgSPaXgAdzE

Kinda apropos for this dipstick, IMO. And Bernath: it’s a freaking song, perdedor. No threat is implied or intended by linking it here. It just seems to fit you to a “t”.

LebbenB

He’s a termite, choking on the splinters.

That’s a stanza from the song and in no way implies or conveys a threat of any kind.

Enigma4you

Well Dallas found an old old photobucket account of mine. Thanks Dude, I had lost my photos of Mt Rushmore in the winter.

Yep its me, That little cat I was holding 4 years ago is now freaking huge, Its a Main Coon that pic was taken on the day I got him. He is now close to 30 pounds of Hair and Eyes.

Dallas, Im not a gun enthusiast. Well I guess I am but to be more exact I am a collector. I have a bunch.

But more to the point. I was named in Bernaths abortion of a filing. He sent me some drivel and I replied.

I forwarded Jonn the Email.

Im am going to say again here what I said to him.

I am not afraid. I welcome the chance to see him in court.

Oh and Dallas, My lack of post here in the last few weeks has nothing to do with you. I didnt even know about your bullshit until today.

That Little Gremlin aboard the Airplane

Daaaannnieeeelll, don’t worry about the stupid fuel, go ahead and take off….

ghp95134

That Little Gremlin Aboard the Airplane

NNNnyunyuknyuk…

That Little Gremlin Aboard the Airplane

I meant THIS one…

That Little Gremlin Aboard the Airplane

Gee Whiz, my brethren must be playing with the circuit boards today…

ghp95134

So, what does this mean?

And Roes 1 through 50 cross defendants.

Because …. “enquiring minds want to know.”

–ghp95134

Hondo

I think it means he’s trying to sue fish eggs.

Just an Old Dog

I wonder exactly how a Photographer’s Mate stationed on an Aircraft Carrier was exposed to extreme levels of agent orange?
A cocksniffer like Birdbath is the type of little bitch ass sailor who would use every excuse to keep from getting his hands dirty, much less handling ordnance or payload for the birds.
He is the kind of cunt wafle who would grab his empty camera and pretend to be “working” when the calls went out for UNREP working parties.
There is no doubt in my mind that he worked the system to get VA disability, or whatever reason he got it. He is one persistent parastic son-of-a-whore.If you have the time and persistence, eventually if you throw enough bullshit at the VA, part of it will catch.
The only way turdsmoker could have gotten exposed to that much agent orange is if some Bull-Gay made him his bitch, and used the haz-mat storage locker as their love nest.
Birdbath would be bent over the barrel, sucking up agent orange with one end and getting a “rogering” in the other. Then he would change ends.

Stick Stickly

This brings up a couple thoughts of mine. I was wondering about navy vets and the agent orange exposure. It turns out that the VA has a presumption of exposure if anyone ever stepped foot on Vietnam soil during a certain period between January 1962 and May 1975. In addition it has a list of 308 ships that docked to the shore, operated offshore or close enough that there is also a presumption of exposure for sailors on these ships.

The only two ships that Crazy Pants talks about being on are the USS Kearsarge and USS Yorktown. Neither of those ships make the list. I also found, thanks to my Google-Fu, a record of a different veteran, who also served on the Kearsarge and Yorktown, being denied an appeal for agent orange related service connection for diabetes type ii:
http://www.va.gov/vetapp11/files2/1110474.txt

Most of it doesn’t apply here, but it specifically says that “There is no evidence that the USS KEARSARGE or the USS YORKTOWN ever came to port or had members disembark on the shore of Vietnam.

The conclusion is that, assuming I missed something and he served on a different ship, he never set foot on Vietnam or served on one of the 308 ships that have presumption of exposure. I’m aware that the VA also states that veterans who did not touch Vietnamese soil or serve on those 308 ships may be approved on a case by case basis. But am I missing something here?

AverageNCO

Right or wrong, the assumption is that every Vietnam Vet suffers from illness related to Agent Orange. A study was done among the C-123 crews that actually sprayed it, and found they had their health, specifically cancer, was no different than the general population within the same demographic. The only the difference they showed was higher levels of liver problems associated with higher levels of alochol consumption compared to the general population. But the notion of Agent Orange causing every health condition of Vietnam service members is set in stone and doesn’t seem to be going anywhere. While investigating another phony we’ve profiled here, I found myself talking to a very nice guy, with great intentions, who has helped process hundreds of disablity claims for servicemembers relating to Agent Orange. He took great pride in that he was able to help a Vietnam “Era” obtain Agent Orange related disablity payments, even though the guy had never left CONUS, and could not provide proof he was ever in close proximity to the stuff while stateside. I’m not saying there are not Vets with health issues related to their service in Vietnam. But would any of us on this blog be shocked that there are people out there who abuse the Agent Orange situation to pad their bank accounts?

Powerpoint Ranger

Someone should tell Witless that “Esquire” goes after someone’s name and not before. Maybe he thinks DB is chainmail wearing knight, or at least a Medieval Times extra.

Nicki

Oh, come on! Not like anyone can tell him anything. LOL Dude’s nuttier than squirrel shit. A few months ago, he was claiming I was Jonn or CV or both or something.

MCPO NYC USN Ret.

Bernath is not, never was nor will he ever be a Genuine or Honorary CPO. PERIOD!

And this “matters”.

MustangCryppie

Damn straight!

CTIC(NAC)

Al T.

With this level of crazy coming out, I’d suggest reviewing your personal security TTPs. Seriously.

FatCircles0311

lol @ batshit old balls.

Has this guy gotten a victim card tattoo yet? It would save him a lot other people’s time to see how full of shit he is.

Jonn Lilyea

So, I was just looking at my Google ad revenue for the month and it seems that those ads that Bernath copied when he stole my blog layout are generating some income for me. Thanks, Dan!

Hondo

There is a God! And He loves irony! (LMAO)

HS Sophomore

My irony meter just melted.

Aysel

That’s priceless (except the part where his dishonesty is actually making you money) ^_^

Sparks

Speaking of clicking on ads. The Koala Men’s Swim and Fun Wear ad…sorta scared me.

Mr. Blue

Dollars to doughnuts that Psul, DuLlAsS 41 and Crash are spending a lot of time & money on that location, and probably clicking through here each time.

Sparks

Anybody want to see a YouTube video on Male Catheter Insertion? I didn’t think so. That’s why I didn’t post it. 😀 You can thank me later.

gas tank

Taking it out is worse. (wink)

Stay thirsty my friends.

Hondo

I don’t think you have to tell Sparks that, gas tank. (smile)

Sparks

Hey Hondo! You remembered! Cool. Now I have to go pee really bad. 😀

GDContractor

Who could forget? I get shrinkage just thinking about it!

Mr. Blue

Somebody needs to change Crash’s WiTlEsS 41 poster- you know, put in the actual picture of DuLlAsS’s smiling mugshot instead of the stock photo Crash no doubt stole for the shot.

You know, for accuracy and all.

MCPO NYC USN Ret.

Monkey Lawyer’s first cousins located deep in the forests of Uganda … and they are a lawless as the Monkey Lawyer himself:

Sparks

Again, I say, there’s the answer for Procol Harem in Nigeria!

Valkyrie

When I wake up enough to understand all the crazy these buttqueefs are spewing, I’ll post something witty and thought provoking. Y’all can admire me now though.

Old Trooper

We always do! 🙂

Sapper3307

I bet wears a latex nurses outfit when its catheter time. This turd cant practice law or fly I mean land an aircraft.

MustangCryppie

Bernath and his buddies are fucking grade A, category 1 batshit crazy!

I LOVE it!

NHSparky

Here’s what I find fucking hilarious–at one point, when DullASS posts my IP address, OS platform, etc., which he could have never gotten unless, say, someone visited a website that recorded it.

That might be a page, like, say, Bernath’s little webpage of fucktardery.

However, ask DullASS about when he got it from Bernath, and he gives this, “Who’s he?” bullshit response.

Seriously, they’re not even trying anymore. Go home DullASS, you’re drunk. And don’t fly, take a cab.

As far as you go, Bernath:

nbcguy54

His Ft. Myers law office is a Pack and Send mail drop located between a nail salon and a cafe. High rent law office you bald fuck..

Rub

I have followed this story for a while now. I never thought this guy was an actual licensed attorney, but now you say he was actually a member of The Bar in California, and practiced in Oregon. Do any of the state associations have set standards for revocation for dementia, or other mentally disabling diseases? From his current writing skills, it appears he is no kidding, obviously, and seriously mentally disabled.

Just an Old Dog

Birdbath is a crooked cagey piece of shit. He got his license in CA. He practiced there for quite a while, had a brief suspension and eventually flew the coop, destroying all his files.
He applied or a license in Oregon, but was denied due his lack of moral character. The Oregon Bar basically told him it would be a cold day in hell before they let a piece of shit like him be given a state license.
He used his Ca license to practice Social Security Law until THEY barred him from practicing.
He basicaly uses his status as a Ca BAR member to file bullshit suits. He pretty much does little if anything in Ca itself. That way he doesn’t get any in-state complaints, which might get him dis-barred,

Mr. Blue

Basically, he’s a living example of the need for tort reform. He’s the type that uses the shotgun approach of filing tons of frivolous lawsuits hoping that someone will pay him to go away.

B Woodman

STOP IT! PLEASE, IN THE LOVING NAME OF G-D, JUST STOP! TEH BERNATH STOOPID, IT HURTS!! AAHHHHH!!

Delilah T.

I’m just dropping this in here to counteract the idiocy of the bernastyisms.

LebbenB

At least she has good trigger finger discipline.