Stephen D. Smith – UK Bloaterman
Our friends in the United Kingdom, The Walter Mitty & Bloater Hunters Group, send us their work on Stephen D. Smith. Smith is 52 y/o as of June 2019 and lives in Taylor, TX.
Just so you understand the terminology and differences in the UK vs US – a “Walter Mitty” is a Stolen Valor POSer and a “Bloater” is an embellisher. Also, the Stolen Valor hunters are allowed to read military records but not publish them.
So, Steve Smith was in Texas and then went to Britain, and has now moved back to Texas and set up a security company called Asgard National Training Group LP.
Since Steve Smith’s case has been published, he took down his Facebook page and his business page. Here are some specifics to be aware of, shared by our friends in the UK.
Steve Smith was flagged up earlier this week by a member after claiming to be a retired CSM and all arms Para Commando trained amongst other bloater-shit. The real story is that he failed basic for the Royal Signals, moved to the RAOC as a storeman for about ten months before buying himself out. After his long service in the Army, Steve went on to become a cadet adult instructor in Durham. They managed to track down a few of those who he served with with and here are a few things they had to say:
1. He was a very poor cadet instructor.
2. He used to give it the big one to the cadets that he was a war hero and a battle-hardened soldier,
3. Was not allowed to teach much due to his lack of knowledge.
4. Brought a mess dress that had lots of ribbons on it Badges of rank and used to cut around wearing it on cadet camps.After this, he moved to America and set up his own company Asgard National Training Group and totally re-invented his life. He has been making money off the back of these claims and somehow duping a lot of Americans he’s the real deal.
Steve now claims:
1. He was a former Sergeant Major British Army. (See below)
2. All Arms Para Commando trained.
3. Sniper / Counter sniper trained.
4. Served in a counter-terrorist team in NI, Central America & the Middle East.
5. An instructor in military training, small unit tactics & hand to hand combat.Steve managed to fit all the above and rise to W02 in ten months and ranks up there with a legends
Verdict – Bloaterman USA
On a quick sweep, we found no record of US military service but he does not claim any.
So, if you live in Texas and need personal security training, you may want to consider all of this before you hire a man who claims to be a retired British Army Sergeant Major who is sniper and counter-sniper trained.
Thanks to our friends in the UK for sending us this case.
Category: Stolen Valor
Aw, he’s kinda cute, ain’t he? Like that barking little widget masquerading as a dog in the yard next door, barking at everyone, including the local coyotes…. all sound and fury and mostly hot air.
Moving on!
Primero!!!!
Stephen D. Smith…Bloated up with his Bovine excrement. Welcome to your new found Google Fame. Too bad you took down all your social media lies before we had a chance to really rain down on your lying, embellishing limey ass. (Apologies to my Brit Friends) ESAD mofo!
Not sure if you are worth the bandwidth or keyboard ribbon ink, but ChipNASA’s trigger finger is itchy and I will be the FIRST to call for the deployment of The Hemisphere of Insults.
Would it be appropriate to refer to this “Magnificent Fellow” as a slimy limey?
The term “limey” came from a time in the 18th century where it was common for sailors to get scurvy, a disease caused by Vitamin C deficiency.
British sailors figured out if they took limes with them on sailing trips, they could avoid scurvy. Others started referring to British sailors as “limeys.”
The term extended to all Brits.
Yes, yes I know all that. The question is do we refer to this fine fellow as a slimy limey?
I don’t think so. He exported his greasy self to the UK, annoyed them immensely, and came running back to the good ol’ USofA, Not a true transplant anywhere, just a lurching lout who deserves a clout.
He never moved to the UK, he is British, and married an American girl and moved to Texas. I served with him in UK Armed Forces
Oh by the way…
SEGUNDO!
Well it’s Friday and we have a request and a second. I certainly will never deny an enthusiastic request for the The Hemisphere of Insults®™ , but this dude, is basically a failed fluffer and (hey I should Control+F “fluffer” and add something to the The Hemisphere of Insults®™ ) anyway, as I was saying, if we get an “AYE” vote off we go, because this guy fucked up on two continents to yeah, dickless wonder here may get the bomb dropped on him.
“AYE?”
AYE, AYE, AYE!
Load all torpedo tubes, set primers and fire when ready! Make sure all fish are running hot, straight and normal!
OK so I am really a sick individual (and who here didn’t already know that?!?!) but I just added ” failed fido fluffer in doggo pron, even using an entire jar of top quality, organic, gourmet, peanut butter, …” to the The Hemisphere of Insults®™
Maybe because I’m aggravated and it’s been a crappy week at work (not for me, but I’m running around with the pooper scooper) and I’m feeling particularly hateful!
😀 😀 😀
OK PEOPLE! Quiet down. Remember your safety brief. Have all necessary gear prepared. DON YOUR PROTECTIVE REFLECTIVE PT BELT!! Hey Stevie Baby, I hope that for all the effort you put into it, and you have now managed to piss off a whole lot of folks on TWO CONTINENTS, you have indeed, earned and are about to be awarded to coveted, The Hemisphere of Insults®™ Pip Pip and all that shit. Do Enjoy. Ta. The Hemisphere of Insults®™ (aka, “This Ain’t Hell” Thesaurus) FIRE IN THE HOLE!!!! TACTICAL NUCLEAR ROUND OUT!!!! THREE PASS AIRCRAFT BOMB RUN!!!!! DANGER CLOSE!!!! MOPP LEVEL 4!!! TAKE COVER!!!!! …. Stephen (Stephanie) D (The Walter Mitty & Bloater Hunters Group: “ Everything was fine until we all had to deal with dickless here”…” TAH: “Is this true?” The Walter Mitty & Bloater Hunters Group: “Yes folks, it’s true. This man has no dick.” credit: Ghostbusters) Smith (Shittart) …HEY WONDER WOMAN, We all hope you read this and come back here and try to defend your actions, but, you won’t because, YOU’RE A STRAIGHT UP COWARD, from the US and UK, has been outed as a “bloater”, an embellisher, of a really truly shitty, Army career, vile, flaming piece of skunk shit, ALLEGEDLY, but not confirmed or proven, but in some people’s opinion, works balls, tickles taint and tongue punches hobo’s crusty fart boxes all, I Guess, while being a syphilitic, turd-sucking feces factory, HOLY Baby Ape Shit Breath, Bitch-ass Fuckstick guzzler, pile infested, onion-eyed flapmouthed butt-bailiff, “Fowl” mouthed Chicken Fucking Chickenfucker, You flaccid piece of tofu, Simply a fart in life waiting to be fabreezed away, moral equivalent of pond scum, THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS A WALKING TURD, inflamed, “Towel boy” in a gay bath house, DILLY DILLY!!, Ambulatory verbal dissembling anus, Fucking one cell spermatozoon with a tiny flagella, gaping giant ass walking fungus shit nugget, Bag of seasoned dog shit, Cambodian cunt sauce, he deserves to have his private parts gnawed by angry badgers, Anyone who ever loved you was wrong, bucket of ass chum, Poopy Headed ball working asshole, JERK OFF !!, Soup Sandwich,… Read more »
Eat a whole fucking ConEx full of dicks!, anal sphincter canyon yodeling phallic squeezer, numbnuts, malodorous odiferous felonious fido fucker, snowball, Coprophagous fop, Gonorrhea breath, swizzle tits, giggling beerflecked canker blossom, how did you survive infancy, rectal rapee, GonnoSyphaHerpaClapAIDS Patient Zero monkey buggerer, ball-tickling & ball gargling bullshiat artist, R2-Dildo, You suck dick for beer money and you don’t even drink beer, secret squirrel masturbation specialist, hand in your badge, Adolf, you fart repeatedly just to make yourself smell better, spunk-trumpet, Bakrauf, face down ass up weak kneed pillow biter, maybe this hero could strap a suicide vest to himself, go out in the open desert and make people confetti out of himself, Wait, of all the lucky sperms that came outta your daddy, you’re the one that WON??, He’s so much of a dickhead he takes Viagra thru a nasal spray, and he’s still limp, How I the fuck do assholes like this sleep at night? With one hand on their tiny dick and the other thumb in their ass, Holy shit, maybe a “buggerer of little boys”, rottencrotched, rump wrangling, colostomy bag curator, A butter knife amongst razor blades, Rusty Trombone Virtuoso, he is the kinda guy who likes meeting up with two strange men so they can sword fight in his mouth, he’s the kind of guy you’d find hanging out around highway rest areas because he’s frequenting the public bathrooms trying to gargle marbles for change, culo de chongo, booger eating fuckbucket, Lemon Party-lusting, Pissflap, fucknuckles, is about as real as a Civil War Issue polyester blanket, Menstrual quimsquirt, you’re as useful as Anne Frank’s Drum Set, overzealous polyp burglar, poser quim squirt, bed wetting, follows in Victorious Felder’s bovine excrement -filled boots, I wanna get a running start and drop kick him right in the ‘ol yogurt gun, Fustilarian, Knobgobble, prancing pony penis puffer, Likes to turn his mouth into a day care center with guys baby gravy behind the local truck stop, I hope his rectum is popped so hard, he will achieve liftoff on Mr. Tiny’s launch pad, less popular than a Cheese… Read more »
if I had the taste of you in my mouth, I’d lick the taint of a dead rotting water buffalo in the Vietnamese jungle just to get the taste out, just to fix your shit, you could make a Jew deny the Holocaust, you are the reason Jesus can’t play peek-a-boo, he has holes in his hands, you are a 0 EPR/OPR, you are worse than a Dishonorable Discharge….from your Mom’s vagina, Massive, back alley, bucket of schlong fuck juice, cockalorum cum-guzzling gutter slut, Dalton Coldiron’s bunny-butt buddy atomic sphincter goblin, If you stuck your brain up a gnat’s ass, it would look like a BB in a boxcar, Jackanape, Fuck Tart, Sitzpinkler, lispian, pussytits, Milksop, you’re such an embarrassment to your family and your father is so ashamed of you, he’d refuse a free blowjob out of fear of further spilling his seed, Forrest Gump points and laughs at you, you suck so bad, AIDS and Cancer have nightmares about you, your shit is about as funny as Anne Frank, Helen Keller and Terri Schiavo having an orgy in the showers at Auschwitz, you suck so bad, puppies, kittens and babies hate you, you are so loathsome, looks like the kind of guy who lets his wife gets her shit pushed in by Mr. Ouch while he watches, Gandhi would ass rape you for giggles, you are about as welcome as a yeast infection, hemorrhoids, gonorrhea, syphilis, chlamydia, genital wards and herpes, you’re one of the reasons Trump is President, you make God want a do-over, You vacuous, toffee-nosed malodorous pervert, pillock, puss soaked jackwagon, waste of trace elements and water, Jizztissue, knob breath dick biscuit, Pettifogger, Bunghole Baby,Rear Admiral of the Butt Piracy, donkey raping shit-eater, twatface, pedicabo ego vos et irrumabo it, may he lay a lip lock on the snotty end of a moose cock,butt munch, deep sea crotch lobster, man of the night in a large animal bordello, I bet you’re the kind of guy that would fuck your own mother in the ass and not even have the goddamn common courtesy to give her… Read more »
AMEN and AMEN!!!!!!!!!!!
Amen! Amen! A-A-A-men! Amen! Ameb!
Is that all.!!!🤣🤣🤣🤣
Bollocks! I’m knackered and cream crackered by all the bloatermen and Walts out there but at the same time I’m cheeky and chuffed to bits that our mates bloody caught this chap. What a codswallop!
To the Walt hunter folks in the UK – give us a tinkle on the blower should another dog’s dinner show up and we’ll be on it like a car bonnet.
What a Burk
Walter Mitty???, he doesn’t look like Danny Kaye.
… or Ben Stiller.
Note for the Mayor and City Council of Taylor, TX:
If any of you are in need of a new operable Male Bovine Fecal Matter Detector (NSN 6635-00-498-3466), any old Supply Sergeant up at Killeen/Fort Hood should be able to fix you up with one.
Killeen is less than an hour’s drive (about 60 miles) from Taylor and it wouldn’t take a whole lot of effort to obtain a working detector./smile
What a wilted wanker.
Stephen D. Smith = bloody, wilted WANKER!
I’ll bet his accent is fake, too.
Couldn’t even hack it as a cadet instructor. That’s a Loser with a capital L.
Thanks be to our Brit brothers for casting the harsh light of day on this cockroach.
Call Blimey love a duck, this guy is a real shit bird.
Stephen D. Smith, what a BLOODY WANKER!!!
OK, can someone familiar with England help me understand what a “cadet instructor” is or does?
Is it analogous to what we would think of as “Junior ROTC” in the US? Or more like the Boy Scouts?
I’m assuming that whatever it is, it has no official affiliation with the Royal Armed Forces because otherwise how would someone with only negligible service get a position as an “instructor?”
I take it to mean he was working with an organization like the Army Cadet Force. British version of JROTC or Civil Air Patrol.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Army_Cadet_Force
The Army cadet force of which i was a member after serving in the British Army is a youth organisation that takes youths both male and female between the ages of 13 & 18 yrs old and gives them a basic knowledge of military skills ie Skill at Arms Map reading First Aid adventure training. Plus a few more although its NOT a recruitment organisation many ex cadets go on to military careers. And all become oroductive members of society several of the cadets i taught have become soldiers nurses forensic scientists and im proud to have taught them and to know them hope this helps
Looks like another episode of “Commander McBragg”…
A few helpful acronyms: CSM in this case means “Company Sergeant Major” – US equivalent would be First Sergeant.
RAOC: Royal Army Ordnance Corps
The terms “warrant officer” and “Sergeant Major” are sometimes interchangeable in the Royal Army, depending on the position held.
Warrant officers in the British military are NCO’s, not Officers like they are in the US military.
Reading through this I am again reminded of George Bernard Shaw’s comment about the US and England being “two countries divided by a common language.” 😀
Stolen Valour — says it all.
Here’s a good one that tripped me up for a long time – is it “grey” or “gray?”
Even though either is becoming acceptable, you can be proper by remembering that E = England and A = America, therefore GREY = British/England and GRAY = America.
We now return you to your regular programming.
Most Texans I know are a bit blunt when making a point, and do not tolerate bullshit well at all. I believe SDS here woulds be well advised to find employment elsewhere, and quickly.
I went to the The Walter Mitty & Bloater Hunters Group on Book of Face and left them the following love note. I hope we get a few or more visitors and maybe some over the pond contributions to the coveted The Hemisphere of Insults®™
“Hey guys,
Just FYI, myself and TAH just lit Steve up.
I have a “thing” that many folks at TAH including myself, have cobbled together called The Hemisphere of Insults®™.
It started small and then over time, has grown to more than 6 pages.
I am just the curator and we use a sort of Robert’s Rules at TAH when it is requested for an individual (Men only as not to be considered misogynistic)
Do drop by and enjoy it, and certainly, if you are of a mind, contribute to it in the thread.
Cheers”
https://valorguardians.com/blog/?p=87774
As RCAF chairborne once said:
“Shirt lifter”
Yep, I added that to the The Hemisphere of Insults®™ after I found out what it was.
Have not seen him comment lately.
Perhaps one of the straglers that got turned around.
He would like this guy.
Just a question of geography. If the Hemisphere of Insults is invoked for a Brit, are we declaring the hemisphere west of the Greenwich meridian or the northern hemisphere, north of the equator? There is a portion of the UK east of Greenwich, technically in the eastern hemisphere.
Or do we just says screw it and go global on this guy?
‘Sniper’
— sigh —
It’s always ‘sniper’ with these poser clowns.
And I’m still not sure what “All Arms Para Commando trained” is supposed to mean. He’s as good with an 81mm mortar as he is with a Fairbairn Sykes “commando” knife?
Surprised that our hero here didn’t go all the way and claim acts of derring-do with the Special Air Service.
Saved round:
After reading his phony claims in detail, I see that he’s also claiming to have “served in a counter-terrorist team in NI” (Northern Ireland).
That’s a sure tip-off that this buffoon is a poser, because no true British military professional who has ever actually participated in those operations will be going around blabbing about it, particularly not on a website, social media, etc.
I wonder why they call posers “Walter Mitty”. I’m sure there is some story behind that.
Refer to the movie: The Secret Life of Walter Mitty”.
Or the short story.
Can’t help but wonder if this guy has special Spaznatz e-tool wielding skills or if he knows how to use flaming squirrels as signaling devices?
Fuck this guy.
You got it. He’s a S.Q.U.I.R.R.E.L
Special Queens Underground Intelligence Reconnaissance Regiment (Expeditionary)(Light.)
You may think the SEALs are tough, but they’ve got NOTHING on the SQUIRRELs.
You think he knows what colour the boathouse is at Hereford?