Just a Little Philosophy for the New Year
Add your own to this list.
GySGT Rzezckowski
Never get drunk and play strip poker with strangers.
Never tell Them everything, but let Them think you did.
Never, ever, assume anything.
Just because it’s quiet on all fronts, it does not mean there are no Snakes waiting in the bush to shoot you.
When people want to make fools of themselves, get out of their way. Record it for posterity.
The Notebooks of Lazarus Long / Robert A. Heinlein
A generation which ignores history has no past and no future.
Always tell her she is beautiful, especially if she is not.
Men rarely (if ever) manage to dream up a god superior to themselves. Most gods have the manners and morals of a spoiled child.
Anyone who cannot cope with mathematics is not fully human. At best he is a tolerable subhuman who has learned to wear shoes.
Taxes are not levied for the benefit of the taxed.
If you are part of a society that votes, then do so. There may be no candidates and no measures you want to vote for … but there are certain to be those you want to vote against.
When a place gets crowded enough to require IDs, social collapse is not far away
One man’s “magic” is another man’s engineering.
Napoleon Bonaparte
Never interrupt your enemy when he’s making mistakes.
If you want a thing done well, do it yourself.
Courage is like love; it must have hope for nourishment.
History is the version of past events that people have decided to agree upon.
If you wish to be a success in the world, promise everything, deliver nothing.
The people to fear are not those who disagree with you, but those who disagree with you and are too cowardly to let you know.
The battlefield is a scene of constant chaos. The winner will be the one who controls that chaos, both his own and the enemies.
There is no such thing as accident; it is fate misnamed.
In politics, stupidity is not a handicap.
In politics… never retreat, never retract… never admit a mistake.
Among those who dislike oppression are many who like to oppress.
Category: "The Floggings Will Continue Until Morale Improves"
1-Never eat in a place called Joe’s.
2-Never play cards with a person named Doc.
3-Never get involved wit a partner that has more problems than you do.
A cookie in each hand is a balanced diet.
Marriage is the leading cause of divorce.
Some pies are a single serving. (one pie per pan)
Everything goes better with bacon.
Bacon goes with everything.
Marriage is grand… divorce is ten grand!
Go like hell, you’ll get there.
You can’t get there from here.
If you think you have the right of way, you may be dead right.
No matter where you go… there you are
A correction on the first never eat in a place called Joes. I should have typed Never eat in a place called Mom’s. in my above comment.
Never eat at Joe’s is also good.
Usedtobe a place called Joe’s in Lawrence KS, best midnite breakfast in town.
Live life like a dog:
Don’t shit where you eat.
Don’t shit where you sleep.
Come inside from the rain.
– Hell hath no fury like a small-statured Asian female pissed off.
– Hell hath no fury like a small-statured Irish female pissed off.
– God help you if you manage to piss off both of them at once.
– You will never really need anything until you don’t have it, or don’t have enough of it.
– Always assume your boss knows everything, especially the things you don’t want him to know about.
– Always assume your wife knows everything, especially the things you don’t want her to know about.
– Anyone who says they have no regrets in life has learned nothing.
In my life I’ve had two wives, on a small statured Asian and a small statured Irish, Mexican, Yaqui Indian woman. I managed to piss both of them off (not at the same time)and lived to tell the tale mostly intact.
Mom is Irish, wife is Asian. See my dilemma?
… mostly?
An mistake on your part does not constitute an emergency in our part* (supply rule).
*Except for the commander, the supply officer, and the property book officer. Good supply sergeants will, however, “see what they can do.”
As my old captain used to say: “Piss-poor planning on your part does not equal me giving a shit.”
“Failure to prepare is preparing to fail.”
Why is this server on Atlantic time (or DST/UTC-4)? (Going by the time on the comments).
Be nice. Until it’s time to not be nice.
No plan survives contact with the enemy.
Failure is always an option. Sometimes it’s the desired result. (Test 101)
And,
Never drink anything that’s on fire.
Two guidelines that have always worked for me:
Don’t shit in someone else’s nest.
Don’t stay where you don’t feel welcome.
RoD. Rules of Deployment
1) Always do cardio
2) Double tap everything
3) Communication is the key
4) Flexibility of mind and body
5) Enjoy the little things
If you choose the middle ground, you’re going to get run over by a diesel truck…
If you don’t take a position on something you have no balls, if you take a liberal position on something, you have no brain.
If you move to Texas from commiefornia and don’t complain about the politics you left, you can’t vote in Texas…. Ever
If you move to Texas from the left coast and don’t buy a gun to learn how to shoot, you have to move back to the left coast…
If things were so great where you came from, why are you here.
Aimed at immigrant settlers planning on fixing their new place so it feels more like home.
I was raised west of Texas, born in Ca, got my first piece in New Mexico, first drivers license in Az, and graduated in Nv. Ended up below the MansonNixon line and dont feel compelled to educate everone I meet on how they need to be more like me.
Don’t let go of what you’ve got, until you’ve got hold of something else…
Shit don’t run up hill.
If you were going to quote Heinlein, you missed a few, such as:
-You can have peace, or you can have freedom. Don’t ever expect both at once.
-Beware of strong drink. It can cause you to shoot at tax collectors–and miss.
-Political tags — such as royalist, communist, democrat, populist, fascist, liberal, conservative, and so forth — are never basic criteria. The human race divides politically into those who want people to be controlled and those who have no such desire.
There’s a lot of stuff from Heinlein, but not a lot of room, Sparky.
Napoleon had some things to say, too.
You don’t tug on superman’s cape
You don’t spit into the wind
You don’t pull the mask off that old lone ranger
And you don’t mess around with Jim
I thought they said “you don’t mess around with Gin”…I like Martinis (extra, extra dry…neat)!
Never trust a fart.
Never pass up a chance to take a leak.
Never waste a hard-on.
A blonde heard that accidents happen close to home so she moved!
I remember 2018 like it was yesterday.
I want to live forever. So far so good.
Abortion really brings out the child in you.
Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?
The only time incorrectly is spelled incorrectly when it’s spelled correctly.
If God is your co-pilot – swap seats.
Don’t let your worries get the best of you; remember, Moses started out as a basket case.
There is no reason to put off, what you can do now
If you don’t do it while you are thinking about it, you may get old and forget about it
Never feel bad about something you tried your best to accomplish and did not
If it is important enough to be accomplished, find someone competent to help you accomplish it
There is nothing you can’t accomplish if you put your mind to it…so long as you are not insane!
If you want to do something, learn what it takes to do it, and practice, practice, practice
If your word ain’t worth shit, neither are you…
Never met a dying person who told me they wished they spent more time at work….
It’s good to plan for the future while remembering to live for today….been to more than a few funerals of those who did nothing while waiting to live tomorrow…
Old age is not for everyone…
Money may not buy happiness but it allows for a more comfortable misery…