Scott George Kallmeyer; phony SEAL
Our partners at Military Phonies share their work on this Scott George Kallmeyer fellow who claims that he is a Navy SEAL. He even has a sweet ID card that attests to his SEAL-ness;
He can’t help but tell folks in social media about how the only easy day was yesterday, or something;
The Navy says “Who?”
That doesn’t stop him from sporting a Navy hoodie, though;
Category: Phony soldiers, Valor Vultures
I’m going to need a bigger scoreboard.
Doofus.
The sonovabitch bought the ID card on-line from NIC Law Enforcement Supply
https://www.nles.com/Seal-Team-Novelty-ID-Card.html
NIC Law Enforcement Supply
1403 Highway 313
Building A
Algodones, NM 87001
Visit their web site and tell them how little you appreciate this shit.
And of course their is that FLOREE-DUH connection, must be the air and water there or something like that ???
Can anybody tell me ?
What makes all the fakkers down in floree-duh think they’re seals ?
My hypothesis is because they live on land by the water and their also happens to be air ? thus you know all the elements are there for “sea air and land”, Add to that they usually addle about like a seal, go for a swim occasionally and eat like a shark, So in the itsy bitsy mind of these trained “Call of Doodie heartbreaker-life taker specialist secret squirrel’s” their can only be but one conclusion, they must be some sort of breed of seal then…but what species ?______________________(fill in the blank)
Thanks for that. I’ve got a Teamguy Brother who was formerly at ST-3 and his birthday is coming up.
I cannot think of a better gift than an OFFICIAL SEAL TEAM THREE ID CARD.
🙂
Please get him the card and have Jonn post the video. As long as it doesn’t violate OPSEC, of course.
These ID cards have been getting used for years:
http://anzmi.net/index.php/cheats-thieves/list/alpha/m?site=8
Scroll down to Montgomery. A real shitbag. ID card is pretty funny though.
Where are they getting those phony i.d. cards? Lt Commander? hell, he wouldn’t make a pimple on a good LT COMMANDERS ASS!!
Metastatic Cocksukker
KA-BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!
(packs of Marlboro Reds go flying everywhere; big cloud of cigarette ash fills the room)
smells like….cachexia
I love the sound of Cheyne–Stokes in the early morning darkness…..
Thanks for that PERFECT mental image, LOL!
Going to take the lie to the grave.
I left him some love:
Hey Shitstain. What in hell are you doing standing in the blood of better men than you, claiming valor that you have not earned. You are going to be goooogle famous when the commenters at this site get done with your ass:
http://valorguardians.com/blog/?p=77847
I always enjoy people with cancer smoking.
That ID card looks super legit too! Finished SEAL training and made Lt Cdr in five years? He’s super duper high speed.
It gets me, but the addiction is strong.
At my brother’s nursing home they take the residents who smoke outside at set times to have their cancer sticks. Folks who’ve lost body parts to cancer. And the young aides who can see the results of smoking out their joining in.
Rationality is not always the hallmark here.
JAFAC.
For crying out loud, the phony SEALs are just running away with it now. Army posers, fake airborne/Ranger/SF/Delta, you guys have got to step up your game.
And fake Marines, are you guys even in the game anymore?
How about a fake Pararescueman, Combat, or TACP?
Dammit, Combat Controller
Ha! Not one Special Operations Weather Man
The “Gray Berets” always fly under the radar.
No kidding. Us Zoomies are getting our asses kicked. The last scoreboard update I saw was ONE frickin’ fake FEMALE pilot.
Ha ha ha…AZDesertRat…In the world of fakes, frauds, and phonies, “real men don’t fix airplanes and only ladies fly em'”
Didn’t you know that ?
Like in the movies
That’s why they rock the big lie and go for those MOS’s that maybe .05% get to obtain. So its either, lie big or don’t lie at all, in the hopes of never meeting someone for real from that small community of special ops folks , who all seem to know or know of each other.
We got plenty here in Tucson that talk the talk (Hollywood style).I got invited to see 12 Strong…now waiting to see everyone wearing the ballcaps (with the backwards flag)and sporting the beards!
‘Fraid so, AZDesertRat.
All I have recorded for you zoomies is that one female pilot faker.
But the year is still young.
Yep. Army phonies need to get busy. If the numbers don’t get better I may have to embellish some on my lackluster 3 year Army REMF Duty 🙂
Shit…they give ID cards showing who and who WASN’T a SEAL? Legitness…
It’s funny, most of the time you can just LOOK at someone on here and tell if they ever served or not.
Nothing screams SEAL more to me than a selfie with a smoke hanging off your lip.
It’s bad enough that you claim to be a Sailor in the world’s greatest Navy. But, then you, somehow, step on your micro-penis and go full mashed potatoes and claim to be a SEAL?
Scott George Kallmeyer welcome to Google University…because you’re about to get schooled in your new legacy.
He’s sort of right in saying “the only easy day was yesterday”, only because he wasn’t exposed as a fraud until recently.
I suspect the next few days/weeks will become more difficult for him…just like the saying predicts.
Oh, and the card he has is a novelty card, purchased at sites like this one: https://www.nles.com/Seal-Team-Novelty-ID-Card.html
Shitbag.
lotsa cool guy challenge coins on that site too for one stop shopping
https://www.nles.com/Challenge-Coins/
Yep, lots of cool coins, but Alas, they don’t have the one I’ve been looking for my whole life.
That would be the coin for a CIF DX* Canteen Cover Clerk.
*Direct Exchange
WHAT? NO Mess Kit Repair BN Coin?
Under achiever… DXing a canteen cover?
How about a coin for getting 100% of your TA-50 accepted the first time at PCS turn-in? Those would be hard to come by!
So sad that “DX” has departed the army lexicon. It meant so much to me! I still remember my D-2-1 (Harmony Church) drill sergeant telling me to go to CIF and DX myself for a new one.
Somebody should send that link to Heavy Chevy!
Do I get this one for free? 🙂
‘CIA Para Military Sniper Challenge Coin’
https://www.nles.com/CIA-Para-Military-Sniper-Challenge-Coin.html
I think TAH needs its own challenge coin.
One one side is a Seal (animal) with ‘COCKSUCKER’ printed across the portrait
On the other side is ‘BOOM’ superimposed over a bunch of ashtrays and cig butts flying everyone
Make it a short/small run, 25 coins or so – only for the serious phony hunters of TAH (the guys who put in all the admin and other work)
Whadya’ think SARC?
I think in deference to Jonn, we should use “dickweed” instead.
I like the Dickweed coin idea. It would be tough to call it a challenge coin w/o a TAH patch or tee that advertises our association so it can be challenged. I mean, how many of us belly up to a bar and spout off about TAH?
I tend to not spout off about much at all.
Not that I have much at all to spout off about.
Except the grandkids, then it is Katy bar the door!
SCOTT GEORGE KALLMEYER – REAL DEAL SEAL… NOT!
Hopefully this shitbags life gets really difficult starting NOW!
COCKSUCKER!
Same cheap shades. I’m onto something here.
http://valorguardians.com/blog/?p=77811
Yup. Standard issue for Faux Seals. They also get assigned a RIB (Rigid Inflatable Buttplug). Most folks are fortunate enough not to have seen those pictures though.
“Phoakleys”
I went to get glasses last year and the girl was trying to sell me on Oakleys by telling me, “But they’re really popular with military”. I looked at her and said, “Uh, no”. Ended up getting a nice nondescript set of Ray Bans.
Recently had to stop driving for a month or so. I was seeing double/triple. Found out I needed trifocals. Got them through the VA. Went to Wally to get a backup pair. Over $300, and that’s with the $60 or so frames. Uhh, no.
In my case, it wasn’t about the cost. The Ray ban s probably cost more, but the Poser factor with Oakleys and Wiley Ex’s is just too much to bear.
Someone should twist that tourniquet band that’s around his neck. The blood getting to his brain is obviously just a waste.
Someone should twist that tourniquet band that’s around his neck. The blood getting to his brain is obviously just a waste.
A navy seal ID card using what looks like a pedophile mugshot? Nice.
They didn’t keep good records in WWI.
He swam thru the trenches in Passhendaele.
He singlehandedly killed Kaiser Wilhelm Von Schlobenknobbin with his own spiked helmet.
Nope, this assclown got his ass beat by Austrian corporal Adolf Schickelgruber.
DUMBASS FUCKFACE!! YEAH, like USN SEALTeam Members carry cards like that in real life, that MIGHT impress fourteen year olds hanging out at the mall, but I and everyone else call BULLSHIT on that!!!
You look like part of SLOBBER Team Three with your “OH, poor me!!” expression with a cigarette hanging out your mouth.
I think you accurately pinpointed something about this booger eater.
“…impress fourteen year olds hanging out at the mall…”
GOOD CALL< I didn't even think about that when i wrote it, maybe he uses it to intimidate the mall rats so they don't kick his miserable ass for shits and giggles?
I don’t think that is what Old Manchu meant. I think it’s more along the lines of the “Free Candy” van, unfortunately.
A founding member of the Bernathian-Butt-Brotherhood.
Nice DEP sweatshirt, douchebag.
*POW!*, right in the kisser! Did he fish that sweatshirt out of a Goodwill donation dumpster?
Of course you know that I will beat this to shit, but is he from Florida with that ring thing around his neck???
He claims to originally from Southampton, NY and currently lives in Pennsylvania.
But his rap sheet shows he’s been arrested and charged at least a half dozen times in Florida, most notably in Seminole.
You are right: http://mugshots.com/US-Counties/Florida/Seminole-County-FL/Scott-Kallmeyer.2854927.html
DAMNED if he doesn’t have a deer-in-the-headlights look in his eyes in that mugshot, it’s like he’s saying “AWWWW SHIT, Bubba & Thor are gonna pop my can AGAIN!!”.
Nice post…I was leaning towards giving him a break for being just so lamely pathetic….but as often said here, stolen valor is just the rancid cherry squatting on a shit sundae…I can easily imagine that his cancer is also BS
This is my own unpolished theory but I think what’s happening is that the POSers are leaving all of those hives down in Florida. They are buzzing around to other states and pollinating new colonies.
Don’t way you weren’t warned.
CLaw; Thank God for the water purifer I have under my sink so I don’t pretend to be a Seal.
Like Jack Jones sang “The Race Is On” with the Seals in the lead.
I thought that was George Jones.
The Stranger; Your right. How did I come up with Jack Jones instead of George Jones?
Jeff.
You were thinking of George’s favorite beverage, Jack Daniels?
Jack Jones also recorded it, as did Waylon Jennings, Sawyer Brown…etc
Don’t feel bad – turns out Jack Jones also had a hit with this song –
Who is Jack Jones?
I bet he’s lying about dying from rectal cancer too.
I don’t know, it would be rather appropriate. Ass cancer for an Ass Hamster!
Are you saying Scott George Kallmeyer smokes with his ass, ChipNASA?
I imagine when he gets back in the slam, it will be.
Yeah! I thought I was all alone, Doc. Too bad I’m signing off. Turn off the lights when you leave, please.
Elvis has left the building.
*click*
I just knew Festus Haggen had a brother. Just never knew he was a circus seal.
As Dr. Galen ‘Doc’ Adams said about why Haggens live so long, “Cause they’re too dumb to know they’re dead!”
Nobody ever steps up and claims to be a UA monitor.
yes they do…they just call it ‘SEAl’, “Ranger”, or “Viet of the Nam”
LOL
Not a collateral duty I ever wanted nor volunteered for; and thankfully never had.
Is that the “Cuff and Stuff” detail or the “Meatgazer Detail”?
The two most important unwritten rules in the military:
1. NEVER volunteer to get certified as UA observer;
2. NEVER get a bus driver license.
3. Never get a generator operator license.
Funny you should mention that. My first ever driver’s license was a military one which authorized me to drive a deuce and a half, something else, and operate a generator. The license was issued to me w/o any test whatsoever…and I mean none and the generator? I didn’t know a generator from a refrigerator at the time.
I still have that license buried somewhere around here.
At least, that’s what I would have written if there was anyone else here to read it.
“The license was issued to me w/o any test whatsoever”
Same here. No test. Nothin.
Then I bought a motorcycle against the commanders wishes. I was in Germany so the plate was just a green color with the letters USA. That was it.
When I got back to the states with it I kept the same plate for the 30 days I was on leave.
Massachusetts Registry cops pulled me over and could not believe what they had.
I later parlayed that deuce and half license into a commercial Massachusetts drivers license with out even a test. The advent of CDL’s in the early nineties made my con a lost cause. Good.
I dunno, I had a Class A CDL before I went in the NG and not long after that I got a Passenger Endorsement added to my CDL which means I could drive say, a Charter bus for a living if something ever happened to my current income stream.
Yeah, well who want’s to shake hands with them or thank them for their service?
got-damn meatgazers, every. one. of. em.
Seriously when I was in the Reserves, they sent out letters every month to the First Sergeants, the unlucky ones got the “go to the clinic and pee” letter, the *REALLY* unlucky ones got the “You have to go watch everyone pee” letters.
LOL
I did see a HM1 put that on his eval years ago… I told him “you really should remove that from your ‘collateral duties’ block”. He didn’t want to, and it stayed there.
And he always wondered why he never made CHIEF?
How did he think that would help him? He must not have had many collaterals to brag about if he put down meatgazer.
Dude wasn’t too bright… and I’ll leave the rest to your vivid imagination.
Pencil Neck Loser.
Calling him a jackass would be an insult to jackasses.
Turd Burglar.
He’s a felon, a fraud, a cheat, and a liar. That’s his legacy. IF the cancer claim is true, one would think he would want to get his shit in order and clean out the warehouse full of bullshit he has spent his life accumulating and doling out. One would be wrong.
He might be telling the truth about the cancer. In his FB photos he doesn’t look very healthy.
I’m sure he also has a MACV-SOG “get out of jail free” card and a “Forgin’ Frank” fake SEAL certificate in his stash; he’s probably got a fake ribbon rack as well…
There would be fewer uses of the SEAL quote if, instead of “the only easy day….” it was; “Fuck, are my balls drangin’ in the sand, dude!”
The phony ID card, Bwahahahaha. Another fat POS scumbag. I bet his official record is in a SCIF I mean sewer underneath Groom Lake next to the dead aliens.
Nice touch with the control number on the bullshyt ID card.
another sad sack of shit claiming to be sick…
The disclaimer with control number on the SEAL verification card adds a degree of authenticity. The ONLY reason someone would pay for such a card is to bullshit someone, probably a gullible woman with more money than common sense.
I almost want to feel sorry for these pathetic chumps. Their lives must either be miserable or they must have some mental issues for them to come up with these bogus claims. But looking at how many times they have had run ins with the law, I just can’t bring myself to do it as much as I want to.