Randy Duck, the Duck of Dupe; phony Senior Chief Gunners Mate

| February 21, 2020


It’s been three years since we posted our case on Randy Duck and it seems the Duck of Dupe has been using his same old bag of tricks.   We get reports from people that he still claims to have been a Senior Chief in the Navy.   Evidently, the Navy never taught the Duck of Dupe how to manage money.  This is a friendly notice to women who are thinking about becoming his next ex…please do a FOIA request for his military records yourself, before you give him money.  Instructions are in the link above.  He is NOT a retired Navy anything.  He does not get a check from the Navy.  Almost nothing about that uniform is true, he is a fraud.

It has been reported that he is short on cash and is looking for Love “Food and a Purse”.

Published Oct 6, 2017:

Someone sent us their work on this fellow, Randy Duck, who wore this uniform with rank of a Senior Chief Gunners Mate and a whole slew of medals to a church “veterans’ appreciation day” event. Among the awards he’s wearing are the Enlisted Surface Warfare Specialist badge, the First Class Diver badge and a Navy Achievement Medal with ‘V’ device for valor.

According to the Navy, he left after four honorable years of service as an E-3 Gunners Mate. His only award was the Sea Service Ribbon;

He didn’t earn that National Defense Service Medal he’s wearing either.

Category: Navy Poser, Phony soldiers, Valor Vultures

Comments (201)

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  1. He thinks that he is a former Senior Chiefs Gunners Mate by the old adage that if it talks like a duck, walks like a duck and looks like a duck, then he is a duck.

  2. Comm Center Rat says:

    Randy Duck’s blubbery “chest” is not worthy of displaying the highly coveted yet rarely awarded NDSM. And the “V” device on his fake Navy Achievement Medal is for VEAL not Valor.

    • Ret_25X says:

      now that’s funny right there!

      NAM w/V Device for Veal above and beyond the call of hunger.

      “His dedication to eating veal demonstrates his devotion to fatardation”

      I’m betting it was an IMPACT award….

    • Ron McCauley says:

      Also, no good conduct medal. He probably had velcro on his rank insignia due to many Captains Mast/article 15s. I’m sure the Navy has an overweight program. He should have been in that long before those man boobs appeared.

      • thebesig says:

        If he had reached E4, then got busted, he would’ve used a white stencil marker, or something similar, to write “void” on his rank insignia on his dungarees. I’ve seen many uniforms looking like that.

  3. NECCSeabeeCPO says:

    Number one clue, GM does not equal diver, not a diver rate. Yes before the ND rate there was DV as a special qualification, and only certain source rates and GM was not one.

  4. A Proud Infidel®™️ says:

    A confirmed “Hobosexual”, one who fakes being in love for money, food and a mattress to sleep on.

  5. IDC SARC says:

    claiming to be a first class diver is no small sin …doubt he would survive the in-test at NDSTC let alone earn such a respected qualification in such a rigorous pipeline had he actually tried.

    • Hack Stone says:

      Do they make a dive suit his size? This fucker is so fat that when he goes in the Atlantic on the East Coast, the streets get flooded in Venice Italy.

      Randy Duck never met a meal that he didn’t like.

      Randy Duck is such a fat piece of shit, his favorite war movie is Pork Chop Hill.

      Randy Duck is such a fat piece of shit that just by standing still he makes his own military formation.

      Randy Duck was never on the weight control program, he was on the weight out of control program.

      Randy Duck is more than qualified for a senior position at All Points Logistics.

  6. 26Limabeans says:

    The DuckDuckGo post the other day prompted me
    to do a search for Randy Duck.
    I expected the search engine to toss a rod.
    Lots of Ducks out there.

  7. USAF RET says:

    “Jesus. I think I’m blind”

    Emerson Biggins

  8. Skyjumper says:

    Wonder if “The Duck” has more hair on him than the original “Fat Bastard” does.
    (asking for a friend)

    “Listen missy, do you fancy another go? Because once you’ve had fat you never go back.”

    “Of course I’m not happy! Look at me, I’m a big fat slob! I’ve got bigger titties than you do! I’ve got more chins than a Chinese phone book! I’ve not seen my willy in two years, which is long enough to declare it legally dead! I can’t stop eating. I eat because I’m unhappy, and I’m unhappy because I eat.”


  9. Gordon says:

    I just read an article about rising sea levels. They must have taken measurements when this pile of goo was in the water.

  10. Doc Savage says:

    Lord have mercy….look at the size of those built in flotation devices!

    You could hide the Titanic in those rolls and still wouldn’t achieve neutral buoyancy.

  11. Ex-PH2 says:

    Someone please overboard with it before it sinks the boat!

    Now I know where my missing 20 pounds went.

    I want those 20 pounds back, you fat bastard!!!

  12. ChipNASA says:

    Since my other comment here posted on the “Older Comments page” I’m reposting this on the “Newer” portion of the thread.
    On the first page, it was nice to see Jonn’s post and I read it in his voice. It’s like he’s still here and in my heart, I believe that he is and always will be.

    That being said, here’s a little ditty for those of you that need a little love from the Man himself….

    Jonn channeling his old Platoon Sergeant powers will always be with us on the intrawebs (I hope).

    Cheers Jonn, Love you and miss you, ya bastard!!

    • Skyjumper says:

      Thanks ChipNASA, I loved that man.
      He was a ““kicking ass and taking names” kinda guy with a huge heart of gold.

      I never had a chance to meet Jonn or have a verbal conversation with him, but we had swapped a number of personal e-mails together.
      He always signed off with,
      “Welcome home, brother”.

      He’s the reason I came here and stayed here.

      Rest in peace in Valhalla, Jonn.

      And a special thanks to all who keep Jonn’s blog continuing on….I’m sure he’s proud of everyone of you.

    • NHSparky says:

      Fucknut. When you go beyond dickweed.

  13. Sarge says:

    Last time I checked, moobs were not authorized with PT gear.

  14. A Proud Infidel®™️ says:

    He looks like a longtime MEAL Team Six Buffet Assault Commando!

  15. marinedad61 says:

    12 new comments (2020) got relegated to the “Older Comments” backpage,
    including mine, which are now more difficult to see.
    Could the cut point between new(er) and older comments pages
    be changed, to separate the comments from 2017 and 2020?
    If possible, thanks.

  16. Anonymous says:

    Veteran of Meal Team 6, eh?

  17. ChipNASA says:

    OK This sucks and I’m reporting myself on the “Older Comments” U have to side with marinedad61 on this that, request to the ADMINS!!!, If we have a somewhat zombified thread, that if possible, for continuity, the thread break should be (for the most part) “Newer Comments” should be cur to the new date if and where possible. If this is not easily done in WordPress or whatever the host is, then we shall just have to live with it and post accordingly.

    NOTE: I knew this and I *STILL* posted in the older comments fully knoing that I was trying to sewitch between two screens and post to the “Newer comments” and STILL fucked it up. Par for the course, some days.

    So, here it is.

    OK marinedad61 I commented but that too is posted on the “Older Comments” area and we had requests there so I am reposting here with the appropriate additions…:

    5th/77th FA.. The POS Randy Duck is not worthy of the TAH HoI, but I do feel that Randy Duck is highly qualified and deserving of the Alphabet Assault, The Toilet Bowl of Taunts, AND The Staff Summary Sheet.

    Can I get a SECOND and an AYE?

    Ret_25X I copy that Randy Duck is a lying embellisher. I also heard is as large as a garbage scow and twice as smelly.

    (Myself) “I’m on board,
    I have the AA and then the ToT and am able to deploy said ordinance.

    I have to call on Sarge to deploy the SSS as that is his purview.”

    Haywire Angel “I second the motion!”

    So as requested, and after The New Consideration for outside assets (Press and the like, organizations, LE etc) to be involved in a particular thread and not seeing that issue here (at least as Admins and such are concerned) and because we’re not deploying the entire HoI, Here goes…

    Randy (Dicklesss) Duck, the Duck of Dupe (Goose Poop): phony Senior Chief Gunners Mate, (Nothing, and I mean, *NOTHING* would “mate” with you…I hope you enjoy your refreshed and continuing fame here at TAH and on the global net…

    And a great addition thanks to Sarge I hereby introduce you to the ALPHABET ASSAULT:
    Annoying asinine Ampharos asshole assistant to APL; bulimic ballsack biting butt buddy at Brucie’s Bathhouse (entrance in the rear); chronic cocksucking clymidiacic chickenfucking cretin; dumbass dumbshit dickguzzling dimwitted douchebag; erratic earwax eating enema expert; fowl felching monkeyfucking ferret fluffing Uncle Fester look-alike; gregarious gangrene carrying Grinch; hypocrtical hippo humping hackeysack full of horse shit; idiotic inbred imbecile with a low IQ and impotence issues; jumping jackass with jockey shorts full of jellyfish jism; kooky kommunistic klown kitty fucking knave; lying loathsome limpdick lillylivered lazyass llama blowing loser; manmeat mooching meatslapping moosecock muncher; no good ninja nippled needlenutted nobody; obsolete overfucked octopus orgy observer;
    penis pumping pee filled poster child for proper prophelactic usage; queasy queef quaffing quantum horsesqueeze; ratt fucking rump ranger who plays the rusty trombone; Shit surping semen burping dick sucking sorry sonavabitch with syphilis; taint ticking test subject for tits on men at Tiny’s Truck Stop; unclefucking ugly ass unborn umbilical discharge; valor Vulture and volunteer for vile vaginal discharge vacuum duty, wanks to blue waffle porn while waiting for winos to blow at the aforemention truck stop; useful as an upset ugly unicorn uterus; yodleing yellowbellied yak yanker; zipper gazing zealot with zits on his zero inch dick. Fuck off, eat shit, die in a fire.

    and to close here for The TAH Toilet Bowl of Taunts ®™
    You don’t frighten us, pig-dog! —Go and boil your bottom, son of a silly person. I blow my nose at you, Thppppt!
    I don’t want to hear from you no more, you empty headed animal food trough wiper!…… I fart in your general direction! . Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!
    go away or I shall taunt you a second time-a!
    Fetchez la vache!
    You have the brain of a duck
    I unclog my nose in your direction, son of a window-dresser
    You are a bedwetting type. I burst my pimples at you and you are a tiny-brained wipers of other people’s bottoms.
    We should make castanets out of your testicles
    You are an illegitimate faced buggerfolk
    If I was gonna break your balls, I’d tell ya to go home and get your shine box. So, GO HOME AND GET YOUR FUCKING SHINE BOX!
    You are a liar, a looter and a pillager, and nothing but verminous, lying, scum
    You are also a Jittery jizz junkie and having to deal with your foolish Stolen Valor crap takes “some real big dick energy shit”, of which you have no comprehension.

    (Admins, I’m going to report the duplicate thread in “Older Comments” for deletion. )

  18. thebesig says:

    Discharged as a seaman.

  19. jose h says:

    if he did 20 years their is know way in hell he should be that damn big..why lie about your rank..so when are they going to lock him up he is a true disgrace to the navy to america hell to the human race.