Ryan W. Lowden; phony Coast Guardsman says he was only trying to help

| August 25, 2017

Green Thumb sends us another story from The Missoulian about Ryan W. Lowden, the fellow in Montana who is charged with impersonating a Coast Guardsman on Flathead Lake. He says that he was only trying to help and that he never gave anyone the impression that he worked for the Coast Guard.

People reported that Lowden drove in front of their boats while on his Jet Ski, which some said was equipped with flashing lights. Some of those who were allegedly stopped said Lowden was wearing a jacket with Coast Guard markings on it and that he presented them with a badge number. In some cases, they said he asked to see their life preservers.

Lowden claimed that none of that happened.

He denied to police that he wore any jacket with Coast Guard markings, but they searched his abode and found a jacket stashed in a pit in the crawl space beneath the home. So things aren’t looking good for him. Even though he has flashing lights on his Jet-Ski, he says that he’s never used them.

There is a Coast Guard Auxillary on Flathead Lake staffed with volunteers, however, Lowden, who claims that he was in Coast Guard a few years ago was never a member on the unit.

Category: Coast Guard

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Silentium Est Aureum

Dear Dipshit,

When your definition of help ends up with you getting smacked with 3 felonies, it wasn’t really helpful.

Graybeard

I dunno – it helps us get a laugh at his stupidity. That’s something.

Jonp

He is taking himself and his asshatery out f circulation. Thats pretty helpful to the rest of us

desert

He was only trying to help…..”help himself to their beer”!!! how do you spell N-U-M-B-N-U-T-S?

Hack Stone

Bruce Wayne not Clark Kent had this trouble. Does his antics make him eligible for membership in the DRG?

Graybeard

Yeah, well….. no.

Ain’t buying it.

Ryan W. Lowden is still a liar and a scumbag.

Ex-PH2

Ditto, double ditto.

26Limabeans

“stashed in a pit in the crawl space beneath the home”

Dammit. Now I gotta move that body again.

11B-Mailclerk

Friends help you move.

True Friends help you move bodies.

Carlton G. Long

Why hasn’t his attorney (if he has one) told him to keep his flipping mouth SHUT ??

Hack Stone

Maybe his attorney is Daniel Bernath?

Roh-Dog

Keep digging. I got a dollar says this clown is a tickle monster.

A Proud Infidel®™

A BUM for sure, let’s not forget he was trying to take other people’s BEER, and that can get you shot in my neck of the woods!

Hack Stone

If it was Coors Light, he would be doing them a favor.

A Proud Infidel®™

I always heard that Coors Light was almost marketed under the name “Sex in a Canoe’ because it’s next to fucking water!

Roh-Dog

Consider this stolen.

Toasty Coastie

Time for a FOIA if he’s claiming to have been in the CG.

Flipping Knob Wobble.

Jeff LPH 3, 63-66

He’s not wearing a helmet and I can’t see the engine shutoff lanyard around his wrist. Gadzooks, holy moley, egads, maybe that’s an unmarked jet ski so the peeps won’t know that he’s an under the cover Coastie. I think we need Bull Dog Drummond and Nick and Nora to figure this one out.

Club Manager

The only light a Coast Guard Auxiliary vessel is authorized to display is a single flashing red (I think) light when engaged in a rescue, search or towing a disabled vessel. They do not use the flashing light to chase down or hail a vessel. The Coast Guard may but not the aux. One of the reasons I left the auxiliary after 10 years as a volunteer was the number of non prior service posers who acted as if their insignia of office was a military rank. Had one guy who wore an eagle who thought he was a captain, his highest AD grade was SP4 if he was lucky. I wore a silver leaf and every time I worked with Coasties, I replaced it with the Auxiliary insignia which is what was required.

26Limabeans

Give em a badge and they think they’re Dick Tracy.

Club Manager

Auxiliary members do not receive badges, it was made very clear we were not law enforcement but there are always those who don’t get the message, particularly the further away from the ship’s mast they are.

Green Thumb

Can we say “Loser?”

HMCS(FMF) ret

Ryan W. Lowden = future cockmeat sammich connoisseur

CB Senior

The Devil says the same thing. “I was just trying to help”

A Proud Infidel®™

THAT wannabe needs to start doing lower body stretching exercises for when Bubba & Thor LITERALLY straighten his ass out, knowhutimean?
THAT shit he tried to pull was some serious Weapons Grade STUPID!

Green Thumb

I wonder if this turd ever ran “out of gas?”

Flathead is a damn big lake.

Mark Lauer

“There is a Coast Guard Auxillary on Flathead Lake staffed with volunteers, however, Lowden, who claims that he was in Coast Guard a few years ago was never a member on the unit.”

And even if he HAD been a member, he would have been prohibited from engaging in the stunts he was pulling. We are not allowed to perform Law Enforcement functions. We cannot pull boats over in order to board them for any reason, and we are not empowered to confiscate any property from any person, or from any space that belongs to them.

RCAF_CHAIRBORNE

I wonder if he impersonated a hall monitor while in High School.(if he made it there)