Kevin Mundy; the return of mirror image guy

It took a moment to translate that into standard English, but this is what I came up with, so bear with me.

‘I am a combat soldre’ (pronounced sodder, like the soldering tool). The Brit slang for f@#ck is ‘sod’, so he’s saying he’s a ‘combat f@#ker’.

‘in the air force u no’: he meant Air Force Uno, or Air Force One.

‘like the special force we we’: again, it’s Brit slang for urinating, so it becomes ‘like the special force we wee’.

‘got all cinds of uniforms even black’: This one wasn’t so easy, because in Gaelic, the ‘ci’ is a hard ‘k’. I think he meant ‘cinneach’ (pron. kee-nah), which means ‘a heathen nation’. So now it makes sense, because he’s saying he’s got all sorts of heathen nation uniforms including evening black.

‘so dont go thar’ – ah, now we come to the attempt to sound down home, like a good ol’ boy. ‘thar’ is, of course, ‘there’.

So I’ve translated this missive into the following sentence.

‘I am a combat f@#cker. Like the special force, we urinate a lot. We have all sorts of tribal heathen uniforms, including evening black, so don’t go there.’

Much better now. My translation services for gibberish are done, of course, for your pleasure.