Sandy vajay-jay
There’s an article in the UK’s Daily Mail that links to a Glamour Magazine article from an Air Force lieutenant’s whining-ass story of her trip to Afghanistan. I don’t why she thought it would be of interest to anyone or why Glamour would bother to publish it. It’s actually worse than wading through Kayla William’s book and I never thought I’d say that;
In the November issue of Glamour magazine, she details how ‘long hours’, ‘drab meals of dry meat and soggy vegetables’ and constant ‘paranoia’ that something could happen at any moment, gradually took a toll on her mental state during deployment.
[…]
Limited internet and phone service added to her feelings of vulnerability as did the fact she was a woman in predominantly a man’s world.
The the pretty brunette said that sexual assault a constant worry for her on the front line, because she ‘knew the stories’ and ‘overheard vulgar talk.’
[…]
And back at her desk job as a public affairs officer, she found it difficult to maintain focus because ‘everything seemed trivial’ in light of what she’d been through.
I’ll tel you what, she’s not doing any favors for those women who want to be in combat jobs, or the Air Force folks, for that matter. It sounds like every pogue I’ve ever heard talk about how tough their deployments were, or their time in Graf or Hohenfels for a few weeks. I think she’d better brace herself, because if she thought that being a Public Affairs officer in Afghanistan was tough, I think she’s going to have it tougher when more people read this article.
vShe was eventually diagnosed with chronic adjustment disorder – a milder form of post-traumatic stress disorder.
I’m pretty sure that everything she has is milder than anyone else.
Category: Air Force, Dumbass Bullshit
I tried to find the original essay too, but apparently that’s a no-go. I’m sorry, but I don’t find bad food (hell, more than half of us wound up in the hospital with food poisoning at Bondsteel at one point or another during the deployment), rough language and OH NOEZ! WHAT IF SOMETHING HAPPENS? cause for any kind of psychological trauma. And I was PAO before I was Intel! Ferpetessake, put on your big girl panties and move on. The military isn’t the fucking Girl Scouts!
So unless and until I see the original essay from which she claims to be misquoted or taken out of context, I call “Sandy Twat!”
#96 “Ugly as a bucket full of mortal sins”, I love it!!!
Ex-PH2, do you have any mor of that sausage and gray?
“more of that sausage and gravy” Sorry, fat fingers on the keyboard.
@104 – OH, sorry, Retired Master, I ate it. 🙁 It was so-o-o good, too! The biscuits were good, too.
I kept thinking of those poor souls in Afghanistan who are subjected to the indignities of ‘dry meat’ (try some vaseline, dahlin’) and soggy vegs (get there a little earlier, silly), which is – I’m VERY sure – far worse than anything recruits have over at NAVSTA GLakes right now.
I want to see the original post from Ms. Johnson, or her story is just another self-centered whiny brat upset because she couldn’t get her morning latte with double whipped skimi milk cream topping with Albert Einstein’s face drawn in it.
Pity poo!
OH, yeah, I was going to go into that sexual harassment thing, but when you put yourself out there as the Vagina of the Year as Kayla Williams does, and as I’m thinking Ms. Johnson also did, then, yes, — you will very likely get grabbed and groped and no one will feel sorry for you. Apparently, Ms. Johnson’s delicate sensibilities were dismayed by the reprehensible idea that someone might even think about her as a sex object.
We had this discussion back in January about sex in the trenches, and it was (finally) extremely honest from you men.
Perhaps Ms. Johnson could have considered doing the same thing while she was wearing a set of butterbars.
@ 104. Master … Ole’ Irish Saying!
“Vulgar language”. I was unaware that I went to Seminary instead of joining the Army.
This doesn’t read well for the whole “women in combat” thing.
Sorry if was noted above, I’m too lazy to read all those posts!
“tell me about your best felony arrest”
“Well, how about your best misdemeanor arrest?”
How about your best parking ticket?”
Think that’s how that went….
I came across a lot of these types while at Balad Air Base, and yes, most were Chair Force females.
Have talked myself into and out of commenting more than a couple of times. I want to give her the benefit of the doubt, but am finding absolutely no way to do that. There is a very remote possibility that it is as she wants us to believe in her single, solitary post, with no supporting information. I say again: THIS WHINING BROAD IN NO WAY REPRESENTS USAF FEMALES! Sure, we have our fair share of idiots, both male and female, but the overwhelming majority of USAF types stay busy with some sort of technical job, which may or may not involve a chair. For the record, I DID have a rickety folding chair while deployed in Desert Storm. I also had a wooden bench and a field desk. The women in my sleeping tent were so bored with life at times that we built a screened porch addition to our tent that exceeded the square footage of the tent itself. Some guys were bored enough that they tried to help us, but we did almost all of it ourselves, complete with a screen door, separated smoking and none smoking sections, and a closet to stow all our bulky gear. There was NO whining! We all figured that this what we signed on for, and much worse. Our collective job was to supply stuff (like tanks, bullets, and mail) to areas even more remote than ours. We did it, and rather well. We had a significant number of women on my “base” and only one was ever caught whining. I almost whined once, but some greens the next day fixed that issue. Except that my knee locked up as I squatted astraddle that horrid hole in the ground, and it was a real challenge to figure out how to get out of the stall without either me or my pants falling into the hole. Yeah, laughing about it seems like a much healthier way to deal with the “rigors” of war. Oh, well. For the most part, those who decide that they are going to be miserable will find ways… Read more »
I just retired from Active Duty on 1 Aug 2013…. Blackfive knows me and my bro-in-law who was an original milblogger, QuestingCat. I blogged for years!
Lt Johnson was my direct supervisor for a short time…. The issue that I had/have with her is her complete inability to relate to other people’s trauma, which is totally IRONIC because she seeks so much ridiculous sympathy for her short time in the military and her Afghan deployment. I don’t want to bash her unnecessarily, but she has zero clue how to get the simple point across (whether it’s her writing or the ‘misrepresentation’ from the article) that she ended up *gasp* going to seek counseling from Mental Health. Without giving you my entire life story, when she “supervised” me, I was pregnant with twins, my sister-in-law was dying of brain cancer, and I was forced to find a new career field. It was easily the WORST time of my life and what did I get from her? She took it upon herself to give me a really crappy EPR/NCOER and subsequently called my new unit to inform them of the issues with me, the incoming E-6. She made everything SO.MUCH.WORSE. And it was out of pure ignorance. She did me NO favors at all.
I spent most of my career working for high-ranking officers and she was easily one of the most socially inept and naive junior officers that I have ever encountered. I don’t hate females and I definitely don’t hate officers, but she was the perfect storm of too-young-no-experience-put-in-a-leadership-role and she was more than overwhelmed. Her intentions were good(?), but she had no place in the military at all. Extremely sheltered with a privileged life…. I still, obviously, harbor some negative feelings, but truly I think she just doesn’t have the ability to *get it*. Let them eat cake! – See more at: http://www.blackfive.net/main/2013/10/the-unbearable-lightness-of-being-a-warrior-princess.html#comment-6a00d8341bfadb53ef019affd7b173970b
@113, What you’re saying is that Johnson had the leadership skills of an empty thread spool and that she was also a social moron.
She’s also whiny, self-absorbed, and has yet to provide a copy of her original post that was quoted by ‘Glamour’ mag.
Well hello again. Glad to see you all are investing so much time and energy in this thread. The Glamour essay is not available on line, at least not yet. If you have a tablet you can download the digital version of the mag: http://www.glamour.com/magazine/apps. Or you can go to a grocery store or a library. It’s a relatively short essay, you could read it standing in the checkout line. It’s ironic that it’s so much easier to access a poor summary of someone’s words than their actual words, but so it goes.
@115.
You are a piece of work.
Wow. Just wow.
Just wash it out. Toughen up. And grow up.
Weak.
@ 113. Sorry you were not led properly. She sounds like a threat to good order and discipline.
@ 115. So there you go, confirms all I suggested. Now do us a favor, move Canada, France or some other weak natured place. We are done with you!
Glamour was kind enough to post the essay on their website today: http://www.glamour.com/inspired/2013/10/home-from-war-but-not-at-peace
@118. you look truly “haunted” in that picture in the article there Lauren. /sarc
Johnson, my niece was an Army surgical nurse in Iraq. She saw more crap and horrifying stuff on her tour than you ever saw. She got bursitis in both hips from being on her feet 18 hours a day in surgery.
You got nothing on her. YOu got NOTHING on the women who worked under fire in Korea in MASH units where they came under fire from North Korea. You got NOTHING on women who served as nurses in Army field hospitals in Vietnam, coming under fire on a regular basis. You got ABSOLUTELY NOTHING on the women who have been serving on front lines in Iraq AND Afghanistan, one of whom was just KIA last week with three other people by an IED. You have ABSOLUTELY NOTHING on women who ferried airplanes for the Army Air Corps in all weather during World War II.
And you have ABSOLUTELY NOTHING on women who are serving now in combat zones.
You are just what I thought you were: a whiny, self-serving, self-involved twit, and an embarrassment to any military uniform.
And you are damned sure NOT what women in the military are like.
Reread the article. Finally noticed the caption under one of the pics. Her mother was a LTC in the Army. A nurse that served in Desert Storm too, Captain America combat patch too. I cannot believe a Army brat would snivel like this.
OK, I read your essay.
You were quoted out of context? Nah, I don’t really think so, former Lieutenant. To me, the whole point of your essay is: “Oh, woe is me. I had it soooooo tough!”
Reality? That’s a bit different.
This quote from your article says all I need to know: “I’m thankful every day that I didn’t ‘witness or experience an event that involved threatened or actual serious injury or death.’ ” If you had – and also had put together a Purple Heart “packet” for one or more of your subordinates – then maybe I’d give your essay some credence. But you admit you never did the former, and I’m guessing the latter is also virtually certainly a “no go”.
Until you’ve done those, your “essay” strikes me as little more than the self-serving whining of a pampered little princess who finally had to face the real world – and didn’t like it.
Out.
Evidently there are good reasons why she whines so much – she has no clue!
An Army brat? Well, DAMN, Lauren, so you have not only impugned the honor of women in the USAF, in which I proudly served, but have stepped all over the special bond you should have with the rest of us Army brats.
But congratulations for making yourself into the poster child for those who will never understand us or why we serve. Not only have you missed several very excellent opportunities, you have contributed to ALL the negative stereotypes of women in the military. Gee, thanks, but no thanks.
To: POS Johnson
Fr: MCPO
Subj: FINAL DETERMINATION
1. All theories and suggestions regarding your abilities (and lack there of) and military performance have been thoroughly investigated.
2. You have been determined to be a Class A, Type 1, Mod 0 MILSPEC POS.
3. Therefore, you shall always be known as a POS for time spent in the military and till the day the sun sets no more.
4. Now get the fu@k out of my office.
CAREFUL, MCPO!!! You don’t want to make her go to EEO and file a Hurt Feelings Report, do you??
/sarc
To Lauren Johnson, you are a sorry ass excuse of an officer. How about you go on over 100 Route Clearance Patrols in a 12 month period. Now imagine going through countless IED detonations just a few feet from your MRAP, explosions so strong, your body feels like you have been in a 60mph head on collisions.
It has been seven years since I redeployed, and my sleep patterns are now starting to get back to normal. Then I read your little whine fest in the Glamour article you linked to and you want me to feel sorry for your sorry ass. Wrong FUCKING answer Snow White. Just as the other senior retired personnel and vets like myself have stated. “GROW THE FUCK UP” princess. Good Gawt Dam.
I don’t give a shit. I and my brothers of the ‘phin had it a hundred times worse than her, but even I’ll be the first to admit we didn’t have it nearly as bad as a lot of folks outside the wire.
Bottom line hon? Clean the fuckin sand out.
Oh, and one other thing POS Johnson(Good designation for her MCPO), you will never earn my respect, let alone earn a salute from me.
Wow, incredible self-absorption and the utter inability to lead subordinates. Story checks, sounds like a few officers I dealt with were cut from the exact same cloth.
@127.
I had sand in my two-hole once.
I called Phildo.
It is now nice, clean, in working order and as a bonus; I feel fresh.
EllTee GreenThumb, you have a two-hole? What?!?
I hope you’re referring to the latrine.
@131.
Infantry slang for rectum.
@132 – You had me worried there for a second.
@133.
And I forgot to mention that when our appointment was done I was missing my wallet.
@134 – You always save the good stuff for last. 😉
I freaking called it. Page 3 of the article – pic of “author before a mission in Afghanistan in 2009.” Goddamn earrings. What the hell is it with female AF officers and wearing earrings on combat patrols. I made reference to this with a female AF CPT in #86. Also, in the pic she looks lost as f*ck.
Ok, so this lieutenant carried 225 rounds of ammo on her her chest, plus an m4 and m9. She also wore 60 lbs of body armor (all this is in her original essay). Let’s do some basic math here. A loaded M4 mag weighs 1.14 lbs. so if she carried 225 rds in 30-rd mags, that’s about nine lbs. Then, there’s her seven-pound M4 and one-pound M9. Eight more lbs of weight for a total of seventeen. Then, 60 lbs of body armor; 77 lbs. Then, figure about twenty lbs more minimum for generic equipment-canteen, radio if she had one, camera since she was a PAO, etc. that equates to nearly 100 lbs. based on the photos, I would guess this lady is between 110 and 120 lbs, and definitely no more than 130. And a mere look at those pics will tell you she is not buff enough to heft more than 3/4 of her body weight on a mission. Then there’s the earrings in the “before a mission” pic. I’ve never served, and I realize that all jobs in Afghanistan, even those of a fobbit, are difficult and require sacrifice. However, some soldiers make greater sacrifices than others. Mrs. Johnson is clearly embellishing the details and hardships of her service, and while I commend her for her service, she needs to stop insinuating that her hardships are in any way equitable to PTSD, and acknowledge she had it better than most.
Well, I am trying to be fair, but this still comes off as one long oh-pity-me whine and not much else.
And quite frankly, Queen Elizabeth II was an ambulance driver in London during World War II, which means that she saw a hell of a lot of stuff that she would not normally have seen. Her father and mother elected to stay in London during the Blitz, despite their home being bombed and turned into rubble.
I truly cannot say that I have much sympathy for Ms. Johnson. Someone should have told her ‘ditch the earrings’ because sparkly things make you a target. If she was told that and didn’t put them away, she’s not real bright.
Any sympathy I might have been able to generate dissolved like ice in the sun in the glare of this self-pity party.
Boohoohoo. My goddam 10 weeks of WAVES boot camp was nastier than anything this dumb broad went through.
This is one officer I wouldn’t follow out of a burning s#ithouse.