SFC Marshall ‘Snugglebear’ Welch; the Army’s friendliest soldier

| July 9, 2013

The Duffel Blog has some fun with a character who you might recognize;

In a gripping new tell-all memoir, Army Sgt. 1st Class Marshall ‘Snugglebear’ Welch has revealed that over the course of his three deployments to Afghanistan, he has accumulated an incredible tally of more than 2,700 confirmed friends on Facebook.

According to a press release from his publisher, Welch estimated his friend-count by keeping a logbook tally of friend requests and care packages received.

“Some days I got so many of them I couldn’t keep count – I had to go on a ‘best-guess’ type of estimate,” Welch told reporters. Detractors, however, believe that the numbers may be padded for publicity.

Thanks to Greg for the link.

Category: Satire

18 Comments
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MCPO NYC USN (Ret.)

He is my new … BFF!

Devtun

Talk about an inflated buddy count…

Ex-PH2

Snugglebear? Snugglebear? I’m calling BS — TOTAL BS!!! – on that name!!!! He stole that from my teddy bear with the scarf. I have pictures.

Twist

Devtun, you owe me a new keyboard.

PintoNag

@3 Cough up the pics or it never happened.

LebbenB

So I guess we could call the care packages “buddy bags?”

Ex-PH2

@5, You got it.

Ex-PH2

@6 – Sent it to Jonn.

A Proud Infidel & Patriot

It sounds like he had a LOT of time in the rear, just like the Fobbits that bragged about how they could beat anyone at volleyball, basketball, or HALO. Me? I was often either on or getting ready for our next mission outside the wire!

PintoNag

Thank you, Ex-PH2!

Tman

And those fobbits are the first to claim “PTSD” when they get out!!!

Hondo

Uh, guys . . . you DID notice the source of the article Jonn linked to above – right? (smile)

MCPO NYC USN (Ret.)

Oh … I thought it was real!

Ex-PH2

Of course, PN, if you want to see the photo, you have to get Jonn to show it to you.

PintoNag

@14 Got it! I sent you an email, also.

Ex-PH2

@15 – Got it! Replied by return e-mail.

Jedi Ninja

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Ohhh man…. it’s been such a long time coming dousing this guy, that the satire is aimed towards, with his own bullshit. Thank you Internet. Thank you for allowing this BS to shine through and expose him for what he is at the very least – a Glory Hound Medal Chasing Walking Exaggeration.
You win Internet. You win EVERYTHING FOREVER.

Anonymous

Well, at least it’s realistic… this in 2013 and we’re kinder, gentler now, ya know. 😉