Gamers in the midst: A day in the life of TSO (in pictures) Part I

OK, here it is! My much anticipated, hugely over rated (and tardy) Gen Con post. In pictures. A picture says a thousand words, so I expect this to cover me with Jonn for the next week, which is convenient, because I will be gone.

I began the day as usual, by waking up. I sneezed, I thanked the good lord Spongebob that he allowed me to make it until 7am without waking up, and then began my rigorous daily regimin of calistenics. This usually consists of hundreds of push ups and situps, followed by working myself into a sweaty lather doing the Krav Maga workouts I learned from my years in the IDF. Saturday I just woke up and made a sausage and egg burrito with some salsa. Then I showered.

What to wear? I mean, this is the largest gathering of dorks in the country. What do I have that signifies a lack of female contact, a desire to live a life online, something which exudes desperation? Oh, I know:

Anyway, next step, do what all good infantrymen do, and plot out an azimuth.  Distance and direction.  Ok, got it.

OK, so I head south, and go by the War Memorial Obelisk.  (A word incidently that my lovely lass is unable to say.  She kept calling it a “ridiculous”.)

Then by the War Memorial that looks like the Helicarnassus.

And straight on to the War Memorial that has a chick standing on it.

At long last, my 3/4 of a mile quest for fire complete, I stand in line with the other nerds.

First person I met after processing through ($45, for a blog that makes $11.55 quarterly on ads) was Bobba Fett.  He was there looking for a Mrs Fett.  His turn ons include blasters, the slave girls on Jabba’s ship, and freezing folks in Carbonite.  Turn offs include Chewbacca, chicks who are stuck up, and being digested in the pit of the Sarlac over a thousand years.

He had good company there though, there was also a Sandperson.  (Is that the single of Sandpeople?)  I snuck up on him and he scared easily.  He returned later in greater numbers. 

Now, I should probably take this opportunity to clarify that the freak to normal ratio was about 1-20.  And I was amazed at the wide demographic.   There was every ethnicity, young and old, and women made up at least 40%.  And honestly, everyone there was unfailingly nice.  Just nice.  Even waiting in line everyone was kind.  And the games all seemed to go without rancor.  (Get it?  Rancor, a Star Wars reference.)  It really wasn’t the dork fest I had anticipated.  And I honestly had a good time.  Enough so that as agorophobic as I am I spent a full 2 hours wandering around taking pictures.  I wish I had had Claymore, Son of Siggurd or Superbowl Six Romeo with me, I would have played a game or three, but I really am kind of shy.  None-the-less, on with out pictures.

The most famousest person I met was Margaret Weis.  She’s the author of the Dragonlance novels.  I am a big fan of hers.  I was more so when I was younger, a lad who loved all Fantasy stuff.  And so I bought a copy of her latest book, and spent some time talking to her lovely daughter, who I believe is also an author.  The lady processing my credit card payment warned Ms Weis that I was probably “an FBI agent, everyone from Alexandria VA is in the FBI.”   I also found out that she is involved in an RPG based on my favorite TV Show, Joss Whedon’s Firefly.

OK, and now back to your regularly scheduled freaks.

Honestly, I don’t know what in the hell this was.

Then a sort of hot chick walked by.  I wanted to take her picture (just for the blog honey, just for the blog) but I couldn’t decide if she was in costume, or just dressed like a tavern chick all the time.  So, all you get is the back side of this comely lass.  Did like the outfit whatever it was.

Now, most of the guys seemed to like this chick here.  When I shot her picture I was honestly worried Chris Hanson would jump out and have me eat brownies while he asked me what I was doing there.  She had the total “To Catch a Predator” feel to her, and not in the usual (good) naughty way.

I can’t even begin to speculate what this cat’s story was.  I’m guessing he just wandered in from a pride rally or something.  I’ve never seen a man carrying a hammer look this effeminate since the Village People, and the paper plate as breasts scared me.  (This joke under review, was there a construction worker in the Village People?  If not, who built the Starbucks, because where you find gay folks, there’s always a Starbucks.)

Ditto this guy.  No clue.  He looks like he has his head up Oscar the Grouch’s ass, but that wouldn’t explain the sword.

Anyway, so ends part I of this tale, mostly because it is taking me hours to upload these pictures to TAH.  But, fear not, lots of pictures to go.  Hell, I haven’t even got to the gaming tables yet.  Just for you guys though, here’s the girl from the other day again. 

Apparently Legends of Norrath is a collectible card game. My friend Ice speculated that she bathed after GenCon in a tub full of purrell.  Unfortunately for y’all, I didn’t get those pictures.

Category: Politics