Get the Ginsu Missile!

| May 15, 2019

This amazing new R9X secret missile is not only ready to lock and load, but will also shred your enemy into teensy-weensy pieces! Equipped with rotating blades that should strike fear into the hearts and empty minds of any Middle Eastern hillbilly, the mere noise of its oncoming strike will send them all running for cover!

But wait! There’s more! While you’re shredding the enemy and serving him up as mulch, this amazing new compound weapon will also create a 100-pound rain of ground-bound flak that would do justice to a starving elephant facing a 1-ton hay bale!

This offer is available for a short time only, for the incredibly low price of $5.95 plus shipping and handling! Hurry! It’s only available while supplies last!

Shopping details are here:  https://www.militarytimes.com/off-duty/military-culture/2019/05/14/ninja-bomb-is-a-bladed-anvil-that-shreds-terrorists-with-no-risk-of-collateral-damage-pentagon-says/

 

 

 

Category: Afghanistan, Iraq, Isis

Comments (17)

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  1. 26Limabeans says:

    Saw a photo of a car that was targeted to take out one guy. Big hole in the roof and a busted windshield. Cool.

    My dream anti-personnel weapon is a C-130 delivered load of gravel from above.
    Just gate the stuff out the back. Then push the truck out last.

  2. Animal says:

    Middle Eastern Hillbilly. I may not be able to sleep at night thinking this group of people may actually exist.

  3. RGR 4-78 says:

    Rid-ex #9, a winning formula for getting rid of shit.

  4. ChipNASA says:

    I just saw a video on one of the WTF Army or ASMDSS Book of Face sites but basically, it was a bunch of guys in a mud wall cover fighting against suicide bombers in the open inbound. Af first they shot them to stop them, then they keep shooting until they hit something explosive and then it was all….poof….
    One of the commenters said (And Maybe I should steal this for the new The Hemisphere of Insults®™ )

    “Oh look…..”people confetti””…

    I almost spit out my soda.

    • SFC D says:

      That is possibly the most vile, improper, and hilarious thing I’ve heard in weeks! We need this video! Stat!

  5. Hondo says:

    Call me skeptical, but I just don’t see the logic in developing and using what is essentially a large, complex, and expensive “smart rock” dropped from altitude to take out a HVT when we already had working smart munitions.

    “Zero chance of collateral damage” is a wish vice reality, and planning based on wishes is foolish. Even one of these could easily take out a number of “innocent civilians” if something goes wrong. And eventually, something WILL go wrong (if it hasn’t already and we just haven’t heard about it).

  6. RCAF-CHAIRBORNE says:

    Why not just use a barrel full of surplus 1970’s Lawn Darts?
    Cool, but difficult to justify the cost.

    • SFC D says:

      I’m picturing a C-130, a big-ass lawn dart filling the cargo bay… parachute extraction, let it orient itself point down, and cutaway. Optically guided for pin-point accuracy. A joint effort, Wham-O and Raytheon.

  7. RCAF-CHAIRBORNE says:

    The Rotary Wing equivalent must be a Chinook with a suspended Tactical wrecking ball

  8. Does the R9X Ginsu come with shaving cream??

  9. 5th/77th FA says:

    Slices and dices but no stir fry? I like stir fry. I like to see them shake and bake too.

    Bring every weapon to bear. Every.single.one!

    People confetti. I “Like” it!

  10. thebesig says:

    They made something that could do what Bon Qui Qui could do. :mrgreen:

    “Girl I will cut him…” – Bon Qui Qui

  11. Was Ron Popiel involved in designing the Ginsu???

  12. A Proud Infidel®™️ says:

    I say mark their location with good old Willy Pete and count the crispy critters after the fire is out.