Journalist Duped by Naval Officer
In 2016 Don Shipley and I helped a reporter from the Amarillo Globe-News realize he had been conned by a fake Navy SEAL. “The Hair” flew out to Amarillo with a fellow SEAL and confronted the phony with the reporter. The reporter used a few quotes from me in the article and Don went back to Virginia to bust more phonies.
A few days after the article ran, another reporter from New York contacted me after seeing my name. She had her own experience with a different phony SEAL and was looking for information. She told me an amazing story that I had sadly heard before. She met man. He amazed her with tales of his military adventures. She fell for him, but the relationship fell apart when she learned his story was full of lies.
But there was something different about her story. Many of those con men prey on naïve women, often single mothers, looking for a man to take care of them. That was not Abby Ellin.
She was a successful reporter and freelance writer and perfectly capable of taking care of herself. Also, the man in question was legitimately a successful physician in Beverly Hills when she met him. He did leave a lucrative practice to serve as a physician in the Naval Medical Corps. But according to Ellin, that wasn’t enough for the man she calls, the Commander. Ellin says between the true stories, he conducted a symphony of tall tales. The stories came to an end when an NCIS agent contacted her with some questions about her former fiancé.
Unlike other people who have contacted me, she was not seeking confirmation she had been duped. She knew exactly what happened. She was now writing a book about her experience and was looking for more information on the subject. Fast forward to 2019 and Abby Ellin’s memoir, Duped: Double Lives, False Identities, and the Con Man I Almost Married, hits bookshelves today.
The current issue of Marie Claire magazine has an excerpt from the book.
https://www.marieclaire.com/sex-love/a25747273/duped-book-abby-ellin/
Category: Book Review
“You had me at Tricare…”
LMAO!! Wiping coffee off my keyboard now.
ahhh…the standard response of the dependapotomus…
What is the mating call of a dependapotomus?
Once the dependapotamus has laid eyes on an unsuspecting Private, she will stop at nothing in her quest to get herself impregnated or, better yet, lure him into marriage. Although it is preferable, the resulting child must not necessarily have been conceived by the service member.
Having ensnared the Soldier and secure in her position, she then ceases all activity and begins storing large quantities of food in her abdomen. Dependapotamii can easily triple their mass during this phase. On the occasion she does leave her domicile, she can be found at the local exchange, often displaying a heightened sense of aggression and entitlement. Disputes are often fought by shouting: “you can’t talk to me like that, my husband’s a Staff Sergeant/Captain!”
Priceless.
Now…imagine Marlin Perkins saying this.
My question about the mating call is still unanswered, however… 😀
Tears in my eyes. Still LMAO. It was my first thought also.
Saw a screencap of a message the other day. Guy was saying he was getting into hog hunting and was wondering what the group used to attract them.
“BAH and Tricare mostly.” Was the response. It’s been days and I’m still laughing.
Interesting read from a different perspective than we usually see here. Thanks!
First Class tickets while assigned to the military? Her first check should have been investigate the Private practice he “left”. He was probably asked to leave. Not a very investigative reporter.
As far as con-men go, I’m impressed by his legit credentials as a doctor and officer, so I’ll give her a bit of a break for that slip up. As a lonely 42-year old woman, she probably desperately wanted it all to be true and at least she did claim to be suspicious from the beginning.
But what gets me is how this guy managed to earn a commission in the Navy in the first place. Didn’t anyone look into his prior work? You need at least Secret clearance to be an officer and have to provide everything from birth and marriage certificates to kindergarten report cards during the investigation. Looks to me like someone half-assed the investigation.
I don’t know what the procedure is now but in the 1980’s and 90’s a Secret clearance could be obtained with a NAC (National Agency Check), a LRC (Local Records Check) and the completion of a DD-398. If the records checks came up clean and no other derogatory information was found the clearance was granted.
Maybe it was different for me, because I still have friends and family overseas, but I remember the process being quite thorough. I had to date and list every country I ever visited, addresses, names and dob of all of my friends and relatives, etc. The investigator even dug up some dirt from when I got in trouble at college one time!
Back in the ’70’s only the TS required a full back ground check, which involved agents interviewing dozens of people who knew you back your high school days.
“So there I was, looking out over the long and dangerous line of sailors at sick call that morning just before a three day weekend…”
Bet he was very excited when the Navy announced this new MOS:
https://www.duffelblog.com/2019/01/navy-meat-gazer-mos/
Maybe the BTTJ gang can oblige him in the brig…
I had a HM1 put down on his annual eval as a collateral duty “Command Urinalysis Observer”. Told him that this was not a good move and that it needed to be taken out. Fool argued with me about it for 15 minutes (he didn’t have much else to add to that block on the eval), so I left it in. enev told the ranking board about it and his comments – it was left in by them and signed off on by the CO.
Never made Chief… guessing the board laughed their asses off about that one.
QMC, you made me laugh as I recalled a scene from my past. I spent thirty years calling on military hospitals as a government sales manager for a pharmaceutical company. One of the most depressing sights I used to witness was walking into podiatry clinics at basic training centers early in the morning. There would be 50-60 or more Sad Sack, barefoot trainees lining both sides of the hospital corridor with stress fractures, fungal infections, whatever, waiting to see the doc.
When I’d ask the young Army captain podiatrists if it was that way every morning, they’d shake their heads sadly and confirm that it was the same depressing scene they faced daily. After that, when young military docs complained to me about their jobs, which was frequently, I’d describe that scene for them and tell them they should consider themselves lucky. Many of them would shake their heads in horrified sympathy with their podiatric colleagues at the thought of that kind of practice, and agree that they were fortunate indeed.
By the way, Dr. Bones, you were among the doctors I called on, when you were standing up MARSOC med.
Must be tough on some gals. From a traditional male perspective, if the rolls had been reversed it would have gone like this at a bar or club:
Her: “I was in the Army.”
Him: “Me too. What unit and can I get in your pants?”
Her: “Can’t tell you, but I saw a lot of combat.”
Him: “Not me. Can I get in your pants?”
Her: “I was in Special Forces, but I can’t talk about it. Clandestine stuff.”
Him: “Cool. I get it. Now, can I also get in your pants?”
Between my two USN careers in Navy Medicine I did 11 yrs in private practice (1990-2001) in West Los Angeles (that includes Beverly Hills).
One thing true is that a physician never voluntarily leaves a successful practice. Colleagues I know worked 5 days/week until their cancers took them out because they were compassionate docs and loved the profession. This guy, whatever his specialty had a failed medical practice. He may have been a reserve doctor which explains his ability to learn some of the “talk” and then toss the BS around the naiive. Usually you’ll enter USNR as an LCDR if you have experience or a critical specialty (e.g. general surgery, ortho etc.) My experience tells me this doc’s personal life failed, professional life failed, and he used a lot of BS to fool the unknowing while he obtained the temporary ” self validating” morphine rush of imaginary heroic missions from a Tom Clancy novel he read on the toilet. I have seen it played out in front of me at times when the ReCon/SEAL/CIA,”black ops” impresario is spinning his tale(s) not knowing I was an active duty Navy 0-6.One or two focused questions sent them ” beaucoups didi mau” ASAP. I also watched 30 yrs of fine nurses feel they had met “Mr. Wonderful” as they fell into sad costly romances when they failed to do “due diligence” and verify data about him. They quickly scuttle all common sense and standards which they use daily to be the angels of mercy they are. I can guarantee this guy “ran out” of Beverly Hills and appears he was fraudulently dispensing drugs (i.e.without verified medical reason after physical exam) later. He was an impaired physician and likely had administrative actions against his license to practice. Not every doctor is “Marcus Welby, M.D.” but fortunately few are dirtbags like this one.
If it is too good to be true..it usually isn’t” CAPT Bones USN (ret)
“None so blind as those who can’t/won’t see.”
The girl of my dreams turned out to be my worst nightmare. It can happen to anyone at anytime. In men’s defence, we only have enough blood to operate one head at a time. Afterward becoming a 3rd time loser, for awhile, the more I learned about women, the better I loved my dogs.
To continue a thought from the toxic thread, not all of the good men or women are dead, married, taken, or gay. Some of us, as posted there, have a much more fine tuned bitch/bastard alert system to protect us from additional harm.
Be Aware….Be Very Aware!
Never stick your dick in crazy….
Been there done that…..
Trust me on this one guys…
That simple line has saved me more than once. Some things can’t be undone.
Ms Ellin sounds a bit toxic herself, starting off with that snotty crack about one of her ex’s being a “Wall Street Republican.” After looking at her on Google Images, I’m thinking the “Commander” could and should have picked better. She’d have been no particular prize as a military spouse, especially with that inbred New York elitist liberalism her bio projects.
I’m thinking his ultimate target was money. If she didn’t have it perhaps her family.
Yep, smug sort isn’t she. Typical of the type I think.
But there was something different about her story. Many of those con men prey on naïve women, often single mothers, looking for a man to take care of them. That was not Abby Ellin.
She was a successful reporter and freelance writer and perfectly capable of taking care of herself.
I never cease to be amazed at how many otherwise street savvy and intelligent women become idiots during the dating process. Men are the worst example of “if it sounds too good to be true it probably is too good to be true”….successful, wonderful men in their forties and fifties are usually already married while the men who aren’t are often the liars and dipshits with some exceptions thrown in of course. I’ve seen it with some of the women who work here at my shop, they come in upset that the guy they’re datingwhose marriage broke up because he’s a cheater is now cheating on them. They are all universally shocked, and my standard reply of once a lying sack of shit adulterer always a lying sack of shit adulterer doesn’t seem to help much…
Ladies when a guy spends your evenings together telling you how wonderful he, trust me when I say he isn’t. He isn’t wonderful, he isn’t honest and he isn’t worth your time. A guy who wants to actually spend time with you will actually listen to your words and engage in an actual conversation. Otherwise he’s just looking to fuck you and take advantage. That’s okay if you know what you’re getting into and you’re on board with that, but don’t be surprised when Mr. Bragadaccio turns out to be another sack of shit disappointment.
I saw one of my GF’s go through $3500.00 in four hours flat at the Dubuque Casino.
I drove her home, dropped her off at the door where she looked at me and asked if I was going to come in…
I looked at her and said. “Sorry Sweetie, after watching that there is no way in hell I will give you the keys to my checking account”…..
The navy should have Doc’ed part of his pay for falsification by embellishing his service. Is he related to Commander McBrag of Rocky & Bullwinkle fame.
Is she wanted a real ‘war hero’ all she had to do was go to a VA hospital, everyone there is wearing a SEAL/ Ranger/SF/RECON baseball cap,,could of had her choice.
The last time my dad was admitted to the VA we were in the room and talking about the little shoppette they have. Took my wife through and she said, “So this is where they get all those stupid hats.”
Love that woman.