Real Warriors and PTSD
Chances are a child in the United States under the age of 17 does not remember our military never being at war. They do not know what it’s like to meet a loved one at the gate of an airport. Yellow ribbons are common place. Troops are always deploying or coming home. New members of our military only know terrorist as a real and valid threat. The World Trade Center are not two majestic towers but a rubble filled hole with an American flag flying from the ruins. They join knowing that they will be called upon to contribute to the war effort, they join know that the military is not the easy way, but they still join.
The nation is full of monuments that go back to the revolution, the name are the same on them all, change the name of the conflict and they could serve as a monument to any point in our history. The names of the fallen, we use words like fallen so we don’t have to think about them as young men and women in the prime of life. The fallen of our nation are a faceless mass that we idolize and turn into heroes. We do our best to not think about them as young men with names and families.
We talk about those that survive the horror of war. We talk about the help they earned but fail in many cases to receive. We hold up to public ridicule those that fake or embellish their service so that history will have a true reflection of our warrior’s stories. But we rarely hear the stories of the real warriors. Those young men and women who Joined in a time of war and gave it their all to make it home and succeeded.
I can’t imagine what it’s like to have to fight for your life against an enemy who you have no personal grudge against, what it’s like to take the life of another human being. We spend our whole lives with the knowledge that to kill another is wrong, but we train young men and women to ignore that basic knowledge, to go against the grain of our very evolution. We get them back home and ignore the conflict of the soul they must feel. We expect the warrior to be the boy again.
I am not antiwar. I believe long and lasting peace can come from it. I am not anti-military. Those young men and women are needed and earn the respect that they get. They also earned the support that is lacking. I don’t want to see another generation of young men turn into old men who can’t talk about what they saw, what they felt. We sent them to war, we need to deal with its aftermath. They are our Warriors. Their names are the same as yours and mine.
What used to be called shell shock or battle fatigue has the name PTS or PTSD now. Returning service members see counselors and are encouraged to talk about how they feel. More often than not they bullshit their way past the counselors and try to deal with it on their own. They feel that to say anything shows a weakness. The truth is no man can deal with the constant threat of not only their own possible death or injury but that also to everyone around them without it having some effect.
The media doesn’t help this situation with the never ending reports of this person or that person suffering from PTSD committing some horrible act. What we now have is a society where a diagnosis of PTSD is treated very much like being diagnosed with anything from an STD to mentally incompetent.
A few days ago I wrote about a young man who did two tours in Afghanistan. I touched on his problems but did not really elaborate. I have permission to talk more about them and will do my best to tell those parts of his story. He had nightmares and bad dreams almost every night after his first tour. He did the mandatory counseling but realized he needed more so he sought private help as well. The effort to balance his philological needs with a desire to stay in the Army were very difficult. Some of his battle buddies did not fare so well upon returning home. A few turned to alcohol, many started having relationship problems and still more had disciplinary problems with the Army.
He spoke about the death of a friend. He has guard duty and was bullshitting with a friend who was going on patrol outside the wire. As they walked out the Gate he made a flippant comment about you guys have fun. 20 minutes later his friend took the full brunt of an IED and was killed instantly. Several others were wounded and he heard it all on the radio.
He spoke about his Staff Sergeant getting a leg blown up by an IED. He also spoke about having to take lives. To be fair and honest he only spoke in detail about the first time he killed a man, how after it was over he looked at him, seeing he had shot him in the face and thought about how his death would affect his family, he wondered if there was a wife or kids. We know there was more than one confirmed time. I have not asked a number.
While deployed he did not have time to grieve or process all the thoughts and emotions. Only when he came home did those feeling start to come back. He avoids crowds now. Loud noises other than ones he makes are not a good thing. The dreams are less frequent but still happen. Those that care about him myself included are at a loss much of the time. We want to say or do something but have no idea how.
PTSD not only affect the individual but the family and friends as well. There is a strange pride that goes along with knowing a real warrior. His family is proud of him, but he takes no pride in what he had to do. He will stay in the Army, he will use what he was learned in and out of battle to help his fellow soldiers come home. I can only think that the cost of being a real warrior is the loss of innocence. PTSD in many ways is the reminder of innocence lost.
We as a nation send them to war, we need to makes sure that they are given the help and support that they earned. We have made great strides in helping wounded warriors recover as much physically as possible, an even greater effort is needed to help them mentally. We often demand accountability from the VA or the Military. We must demand that same level of accountability from ourselves to ensure that this generation of warriors does not suffer the same neglect as prior generations have. What it cost us now will be a drop in the bucket compared to the cost of doing nothing more than what is the current effort.
A big thanks to the PTSD project for the video
Category: Military issues
Two WW2 vets both told the nightmares of will come less often and intense with time .But will never leave you. What helps is staying Today. I still have trouble as you described. Relate to him when you, lie to him and most lose him. Build the honestly between. The one who helped the most never judged me. He was my running buddy and we hit all the States bordering Oklahoma. He was my youngest uncle 2&half yrs older than me. Larry passed on 2 yrs ago and miss him and our talks to and from gun shows. Joe
“They feel that to say anything shows a weakness.”
At night, when you can’t sleep, instead of counting sheep you construct imaginary bunkers. Over time the bunkers become more and more elaborate. When you finally crash and burn, you’re ashamed because you weren’t stronger. And you start building the bunkers all over again.
If I need any motivation any time for any reason, I’ll find this post.
My Mother said my Father (WWII vet) had nightmares until 1956 or 1957. In the 90s he kicked a paramedic across the room because the paramedic was wearing German field gray. My only living uncle (Viet Nam) still dives for cover when he hears a loud noise. The memories never leave, they only fade somewhat.
I have the same problem, to a lesser extent with loud unexpected noises and warning seriens. Guess I just dealt with them a little better. Not much, but some.