Shane Matthew Slade; SF/Ranger/Sniper Phony in TN
Our friends at Guardian of Valor send us the mighty visage of Shane Matthew Slade.
You’ll notice that he wears an unsubdued Special Forces Tab, Ranger Tab, subdued Sniper Tab, and an unsubdued Expert Infantryman Badge, and sergeant E-5 rank which is all pretty impressive when you realize that he only spent 3 months on active duty and booted from the Tennessee National Guard last April when they booted him from Basic training at Fort Benning. Yeah, I don’t know why he’s wearing the South Carolina NG patch, either, or why on his Facebook page he says he’s a 19D (Cavalry Scout).
In one picture, he’s wearing the lower half of the 10th Mountain Division unit patch, I suppose because he thought that if he wore the “Mountain” tab, someone might think that he’s a fake.
But according to GoV, his former fellow squad mates are the folks who busted him out after they warned him to stop wearing the stuff and he told them that he was still in the Guard. His avatar on Facebook also shows him wearing an FBI watch cap, so I guess when he can’t be a soldier anymore, he’ll switch to the FBI, I suppose.
Category: Phony soldiers
Hey, its Waddlin Willies the Wotund Wangers long lost brother!
I was thinking more along the lines of Steve “Snakeeyes” Jordan.
Come at me, bro!
Kinda skinny, maybe it’s one of The Round ranger’s TURDS that crawled out of the toilet and put a halfassed-looking set of ACU’s on before it roamed around?
Yeah, but look at the necks on his fiance!
Airborne…I knew someone would say it before me. She is “two” big girls there!
That there is a bonafide hoofasaurus.
rb325th YEA! Can I get an Amen!?
How about you guys keep your mouth shut about his now EX fiance. Make fun of him all you want be leave her out of it. That low down disgusting and makes you look like a jackass. She had no idea about any of this until today. Keep her out of it. As far as making fun of her looks, that’s rather sad that you have nothing else better to do than pick on her. Judge your own body. Geez
Ladies and Gentlemen of TAH,… WE HAVE A SCREECHING SOCKPUPPET!!!
*Grabbing some more beer and a bowl of popcorn*
Not in AKO. I’m shocked.
I guess that he didn’t get far enough in basic training to look at 670-1.
Clown.
At least when he does try to impersonate an FBI agent, he’ll be rewarded with a stay in the nearest federal PMITA prison.
They take a rather dim view of that for some reason. Go figure.
He already is FBI – FaceBook Imposter.
The Son of William Derek Church the Round Ranger! I think that after seeing how his/its ACU’s are as 8TFU as Church’s dress uniform. He’ll, I just hope he/it keeps wearing that excuse of a uniform out in public long enough to cross paths with a real ME Vet like me who WILL straighten his sniveling little retarded ass out!!
At least Fat Boy Church made it through Basic Training.
This fool could not even do that.
I thought he got tossed out while in training?
I could be wrong here, but I thought he was actually a PFC.
Does that not entail competition of basic (i.e. – to hold rank?)
Could be wrong again. That would make me 0-2 for the day.
I need to pick up my game!!!
If I remember correctly, wotund willie signed up for the ARNG split training option (first summer in basic training, return home for a year, then AIT during the following summer). He completed the basic training portion during the first summer, but got kicked out of the Army during the AIT portion during the following summer. He completed basic, but never finished the second, AIT, portion. I guess since he completed the first portion of his training, NCARNG promoted him to E3.
Oh.
I never really understood the whole “Guard” thing.
But it still seems he made it further than this maggot.
And that is shameful.
You’re right, El Blobbo Grande made it through Basic and got thrown out of AIT the next Summer.
For those who don’t know, I’m talking about “Split Option Training”, it’s available to Reserve and NG Personnel. A high school Senior can say, do Basic between his Junior and Senior year, then AIT the next, and college students can do the same. As for Blobbo’s real rank, I also came in as a PFC in 1991. I had three years of HS JROTC as well as two years of the college version. I also had 90+ college credit hours, giving me that three ways, and I drew E3 pay from my first day. Le Blob was very likely drawing E3 pay until they threw him/it out. This little inbred didn’t even make it through Basic, making him lower than a dog turd on the sidewalk to me!!
Go home fake sniper, you’re drunk…..
Sparkle Pony Shane Slade likes My Little Pony and Sailor Moon. Isn’t he so special! Looks like his fiancé has swallowed his soldier line. Just like Churchie Poos heifer, I’ll wager she’ll defend her phony even after it’s proven beyond a shadow of a doubt that he’s a fake and a liar.
Does this mean we get a new toy to play with? When his “whoaman” comes to defend him.
I’ll take watch tonight lol… 🙂
Thanks, I’ve got a doc’s appt for my daughter with the broken ankle tomorrow. So I can take watch this weekend, no kiddies!
Plus your stuff is so
Stupid early comment submission! Anywho! As I was saying before my embarrassing fiasco. Your stuff is a lot funnier!
Not by a long shot, but thank you 🙂 Maybe one day when I’m all growed up I canz be part of the ultra secwet squirrelly lesbian club with you,,,I don’t have a decoder ring, but I do own an army green flannel shirt…will that work?
Yep! It’s “BYOF” (bring your own flannel) night at the sec”wet” squirrelly lesbian club. I went ahead and paid your membership fees also.
Aww thanks Valky :)…
Flannel can be a lovely thing….
I’ve got the Thin Mints and Some lovely I can bring…
Army ATC…Do you know the secret handshake?
Can I watch?
Good luck at the doc..hope kiddo is feeling better.. 🙂
Another day, another douchebag.
It’s time for some new contenders, the old ones have become trite.
He’s in Alcoa, TN. Looks like he’s a few minutes up I-75 from Bradley County. Maybe he can be campaign worker for E.J. Laughter.
I’m in Knoxville. I’m close with every vet org leader, service officer, unit commanders, etc etc, in the region.. Just came across this.. his ass is major grass… maybe some media coverage too…
Another day, another Rump Ridin’ ranger…
TN huh? Wish he’d go meet up with some of my long tabbed brethren at Ft Campbell….
I’m sure that some of Fort Campbell’s finest will be very happy to share with him how FM 22-102 is applied in practice.
Dumbest.
Looks like he was conceived in the shallow end of the gene pool.
I wonder why?
Check out that breeding stock of his….
Just an observation.
Funny you should mention breeding stock. When I was on the trail, I hated, DESPISED family day. Inevitably, one of my charges would approach me and ask me to meet his/her family. My reply was always, “Soldier, I don’t like you. If I met your parents, I would like you even less.”
Lebben….Was this training video not available?? (“So which one *is* your sister?)
Of course, NSFW with swearin’ and stuff.
Actually, we used to look at the first half of FMJ to get ourselves pumped prior to picking up a new cycle.
I have read in interviews (with R. Lee Ermey) that he did an impromptu 15 minute expletive laden audition ( ” recorded an audition video where he rattled off insults non-stop for 15 minutes while being pelted with oranges and tennis balls.”
I wish I could see that. I’ve never been able to find that.
ChipNASA, here’s an interview that cites that demo reel: http://www.webcitation.org/5yBgOLU2K
From an interview with Stanley Kubrick, where Kubrick says this about R. Lee Ermey:
“I’d say fifty percent of Lee’s dialogue, specifically the insult stuff, came from Lee. You see, in the course of hiring the marine recruits, we interviewed hundreds of guys. We lined them all up and did an improvisation of the first meeting with the drill instructor. They didn’t know what he was going to say, and we could see how they reacted. Lee came up with, I don’t know, 150 pages of insults. Off the wall stuff: “I don’t like the name Lawrence. Lawrence is for faggots and sailors.”
“Aside from the insults, though, virtually every serious thing he says is basically true. When he says, “A rifle is only a tool, it’s a hard heart that kills,” you know it’s true. Unless you’re living in a world that doesn’t need fighting men, you can’t fault him. Except maybe for a certain lack of subtlety in his behavior. And I don’t think the United States Marine Corps is in the market for subtle drill instructors.”
And this (in response to “I’ve heard you’ll do 100 takes in a scene”):
“Lee Ermey, for instance, would spend every spare second with the dialogue coach, and he always knew his lines. I suppose Lee averaged eight or nine takes. He sometimes did it in three. Because he was prepared.”
From: http://www.visual-memory.co.uk/amk/doc/0077.html
I’ve seen R Lee and Kiberick both talk about this but I wish somehow we could see the reel that Ermey shot. 15 minutes of him going off wouldn’t be GOLD, GOLD I tell you Jerry!!! 😀
I wonder if his/its Momma and Daddy were still Brother and sister after their divorce? Judging by the way that critter looks, acts and dresses, I’m sure he’s his own cousin!!
Holy shit! A walking clusterfuck!
Another little punk playing dress up, it would be nice if a GP beating was authorized for some of these fake turds…it might get a few of them squared away, if not it would at least have a satisfying outcome for the rest of us.
I know this jizz stain isn’t real military but AFT Ranger says everything you need to know about bronieboy here.
What a fucking mess that guy is…He is ignoring messages and his girlfriend is probably gullible to believe his lies.
How fucked up do you have to be to pretend to wear the uniform and act as if you have a job in the military. Worse, is that he puts that shit on and lies to that girl and his family probably. Claiming he is going to drill only to just drive around in circles for hours until “drill is over”
I bet that fucker goes to the base and sits by the fence dreaming he was in the guard still.
Idiot tells his friends he is still in thinking nobody notices the fact that he is sporting E-5 rank…goofball. This dude will vanish soon after the hate mail comes his way.
OOhh looky a Swamp Donkey with glittery excrement stuck to him…about time we got a new chew toy..
This little turd sure takes a lot of self photos….is that “the thing” nowadays? All of these asshole taking photos of their douchey little selves and sharing them with the world?
If you have a single selfie to get your profile photo in order great, but an entire gallery of selfies means you really are a fucking jerkoff…
You know, if back in 1979 I had been kicked out of OSUT and the Army with a trainee discharge, I would have hid my face in shame for a long while before I resumed my civilian life. Now we have these failed trainees bouncing around in their phony bling taking selfies of themselves and pretending to be the big bad war hero. These fuckers nowadays truly have no shame…
CH, I’ve come across some that looked right at me and told me how they were booted because they beat up their Drill Sergeant or DI, except for one who swore that he beat up his 1SG, and in all cases, they couldn’t quit cussing at me because i couldn’t stop laughing! I say it’s Wanted Poster time, let’s give CA_Sgt something he can post around and make the little dog turd’s life miserable!
I live in Alcoa TN. How soon can we get a wanted poster made? I’ve got a ton of free time and I’d love to make this guy famous around here.
Just realized I posted my real name. Ah well, now yall know who I am. *waves*
Hey it was fixed…
>.>
you saw nothing
<.<
You’re welcome
The ole Jedi Mind Trick…..
CA_SGT I tell ya my brother, Jonn and company around here, do aim to please. Fixed some of my goofballs and a whole lot of my posts make folks say, “fuckin’ goofball”!
“…They’re not the droids we’re looking for…move along…move along…”
Combat Historian…was that from the original “Star Wars”? Please don’t make me Google it! 😀
“…was that from the original “Star Wars””
I’m embarrassed for you, Sparks 😀
I knew it! I knew it! Saw it at the theater when it opened!
Sparks: “You don’t need to google for it…”
http://youtu.be/DIzAaY2Jm-s?t=3m4s
The embed doesn’t start the video at the relevant spot. Scrub over to the about 3:05.
Thanks TM. Good times, good memories!
The comments on GoV are too funny! So far they’ve got a convoy with a weekend bar-b-que going to this tool nozzle’s house. Now that’s how you do it!
Maybe the BBQ crew can caravan down the road to Cleveland, TN…maybe E.J. Laughter is giving a campaign speech.
How come we never have these “bar-b-que a poser convoys”? You never take me anywhere fun anymore!
YEAH, I read that, too, I just wish I was closer, I’d participate and buy the first round afterward!!
Jonn, one point that does need to be clarified that seems to be forgotten (or, I’m sure many in the Armor community would like to forget) is that the Armor School is now at Benning. Which means he probably enlisted in my old unit, the 278th ACR (TNARNG) as a 19D and went to Benning for OSUT.
Also, I’m highly embarrassed that this shitbag was ever associated with the 278th (I Volunteer Sir!).
Hey Fake Shane Matthew Slade; SF/Ranger/Sniper Sparkle Pony PX Ranger!
Pretending to be in the Army SF is bad enough, but I hear you are also pretending to be a “Major” in the KISS Army! Really?!?
My stars swamp donkey, but it would seem your glitter paste has started to fall off….
OOOOH, SHIT! Hey, ‘lil twinkle-toes, sparkly-snowflake, skittles-shitting and rainbow-farting candyass, TC has targeted you, and to her I say “LAST ROUND ON TARGET, FIRE FOR EFFECT, OVER!!”.
Helloooo Fake Shane Matthew Slade; SF/Ranger/Sniper Sparkle Pony PX Ranger!
Have you made any new friends yet? I hear a lovely BBQ party was enroute to your neck of the woods. I admit, I am kinda of jealous. I love me some good ole boy bbq.
Are you having any Post-Poop-Gasms yet? I know I would be…I mean really..pissing on real soldiers wasn’t enough for you, you had to go and double stuff fornicate the KISS Army too!!
I have to say that is far too unique and magical to be captured by mere words.
Well, I just wanted to stop by and leave you some love Swamp Donkey, and give you a little advice…
1.Please don’t breed with that hippo you are with and…
2. Go sodomize yourself with your own head!
Have a nice day! 🙂
Shane…loved the YouTube video of you dancing. Yea I remember now, every SF/Sniper had to be able to do that to graduate. You nailed it ass hole but my favorite is still this one of you and your little dog at nap time. Nice “panties” too!
https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=1384196841854458&set=pb.100007924660222.-2207520000.1396908053.&type=3&theater
If that dog only knew!
Mustang2LT Coffee on my screen!!! It just hit me what you wrote! The dog’s taking it up the ass!!! BWAAHHHAA!!!!! That’s our Shane!!
Sorry but after 1 and 1/5 hours of PT and a pain pill the mental image is just too funny!!!!
A little test for all you Shane lovers out there.
Shane…has a dog. Shane…is sleeping with his dog. Is the dog going to get:
A. A Reach Around
B. A Blow Job
C. A Butt Blasting
D. All Of The Above
Your Answer. (A correct answer will be reflected in your mid semester grades and will exempt you from taking the Final Exam.)
These assholes are like mushrooms.. they pop up everywhere and are about as smart.