Christina “Chrissy” Axtman; Phony 173rd hero
Our friends at Guardian of Valor exposed Christina “Chrissy” Axtman who told a fantastical tale to her local newspaper about how she was a tower guard once while serving with the 173rd in Iraq, and how she saved the base from a female suicide bomber (with a baby strapped to her chest) earning herself a Bronze Star Medal for Valor and she also was the sole survivor of an IED attack which supposedly left her disabled. here’s the newspaper story;
Well, it turns out that her entire military career lasted a few months in the Utah National Guard back in 2003 where she went to basic training, injured herself, and was sent home. Then, apparently, she married an active duty soldier who went to Vicenza with the 173rd, and her stories stem from that deployment with her husband. But, somehow she thinks that a birth certificate for her child, who was born in Italy, proves her tall tales. Yes, the newspaper did some investigating and found her to be a liar, but she still clings to the tale.
According to Guardian of Valor, the 173rd was deployed to Afghanistan when she says that she was with them in Iraq. And, oh, yeah, by the way, she was a cook turned sniper. An easy transition, I’m sure. Squirting frosting on cup cakes is just like shooting a sniper rifle. But you need to click over to Guardian of Valor for the whole story.
Category: Phony soldiers
Pathetic and she has earned a seed in next year’s tourny. Right?
Probably a top 4 seed Chip….could lead her bracket…
humvees with a clutch? no cooks in Iraq? she was ordered to shoot someone? these guys dont even try anymore. there once was a time when actual effort was needed to bust phoneys, now they do it themselves.
i arrested a guy the other day that was trying to claim to be a Ranger suffering from PTSD. yeah, great excuse for driving drunk. so i said to him “recognizing that i volunteered as a Ranger fully knowing the hazards of my chosen profession, i will always endeavor to uphold the prestige, honor, and high espirit de corps of my Ranger regiment” he said thats right, so i asked him the next stanza and he just looked at me like a deer in the head lights.
” I shouldn’t be here….”
Yeah, you should be in the kitchen like you were trained to do, making me a SAMMICH!!!!
/was said elsewhere and had to be repeated.
Angelo Otchy’s long, lost sister.
What a bitch.
And this just goes to show you that Stolen Valor is nor gender specific.
Comedy this early? I did not know that HMMVs had stick sthifts. I thought that stuff was all automatics. But when she sasy she hit the clutch thinking it was the brake, oh, gee, I almost (not quite) fell down laughing.
I drove a stick shift for DECADES. The clutch is to the left of the brake pedal, stupid. Nice try, but no points.
And I was only skimming the surface on this one.
@4 ChipNASA, my first read of the day and I blew coffee through my nose. Thanks for that buddy. A SAMMICH! HAHAHA
It’s FUCKTARD FRIDAY – Female Edition!!! Featuring a pathetic, delusional nutcase, female type, 1 each…
She had me at “they don’t have cooks over there…”
Dumbass…
Of course they dn’t have ‘cooks’ over there. They have culinary specialists. But no beer.
Nobody ever told her to never go full retard.
I call such people professional liars, not because of their lying expertise but because the pros learn early on that once the lie is told, you stick with it no matter what. By doing so, you cultivate people who believe you or, at least, assign some modicum of truth or, as we saw with the Lesbian Waitress,concoct alternative explanations on your behalf. The amateur liars tend to cave fairly quickly or run away and hide.
Collapsed lung, all her ribs fractured, all her vertebrae ( that would be her ENTIRE spine) lacerated spleen and liver……..
Jezus H on a friggen stick…reading this twats tall tales is making my damn uterus hurt.
What a shame, a good Army cook is hard to find
The cooks in my NG unit (as well as most everyone else) got the two-week 11-Bodybag course before deployment. They were told it was because most of their positions were being staffed by contractors (meaning: being paid twice as much to do half the work). However, aside from one of the supply knuckleheads who was assigned to the QRF and got Air Assault training, nobody got anything more than the 11-series quick course.
No snipers, no special forces, just a bunch of Joes who had their contracts thrown away because the need for infantry outweighed the training the Army had given them.
She should be a high seed in the tourney because not only is her story full of B.S., but she compounds idiocy by clinging to her lies. I especially love her use of her kids’ birth certificates as her proof of service, what AWESOME logic. I notice we don’t have as many female posers as men, but when they do pop up they are just over-the-top. They also seem to cling to their lies with much more veracity.
I’ll repeat what I posted over at Guardian of Valor:
“I shouldn’t be here” No, you should be at Arlington licking the boots of the Honor Guard and families who are burying the REAL HEROES!
BTW — which is worse? Douchebaggery or asshattery?
Cunt Cunt Cunt,nice work.
I feel sorry for her husband. He’s going to have to take the heat for the lunatic he’s married to.
A final comment — if her IQ was one point higher, she’d be a plant!
Was this before or after she saved the battleship from Tommy Lee Jones?
Ya, not feeling too sorry for her husband, I got deeply involved with a couple of wackos myself in the past, and it was no ones fault but mine when the predictable happened, I wasn’t blind.
Geebus fucking cripes!! Will this ever end??
Was she in the movie Restrepo? If she was I missed her part.
I am not trying to defend the woman, but I think the Humvee / clutch issue is poor writing. I read it as she was “used to an automatic Humvee” (the quotes being because given the entirety of her story, I am not sure she ever drove it) but the car she was driving in Kansas was a stick. When in Kansas, she went to depress the brake, she actually depressed the clutch and drove the car into a culvert because she wasn’t stopping.
Years ago I did something similar but the other way around. I had a manual in my car and was taking my dad to the doctor in his car. He had an automatic. Coming up to a light, I depressed the “clutch” but was actually hitting the brake. I got one of those “are you friggin’ stupid?” looks from dad.
This type of “pedal mixup” can happen even between the brake and the accelerator. (See Toyota)
The woman is a liar and deserves scorn (and anything else) but I think the pedal issue may be bad writing by the reporter.
It looks like in addition to experimenting with females in combat arms the government has pushed for the expansion of women’s roles in Stolen Valor.
This one is fat approaching the skill level of “weeble” Kirsten and “hog tie me” Testla.
Public flogging needs to make a return.
Shouldn’t the article’s author have submitted a FOIA to get her subject’s releaseable information?
It seems as though sloppy journalism work is the seems to be a common denominator whereby phonies are given free rein to spread their tall tales.
Tapping on a tiny keyboard, excuse the typos.
Jesus…I bet her husband was pissed off about this. He probably wont be with her too long.
@27, FC, That, and the pillory. We’d get to see if she kept going with her antics after a day of having rotten cabbage and whatever else mashed in her face!!
Wow… didn’t know you could cook bullshit to standard. Oh wait, this culinary arts failure did.
I’m sorry her story isn’t at least somewhat true. She’d have been a deployment 8 or 9, and perhaps I’m being generous.
Jonn…Damn it! Just shot coffee out my nose and on the keyboard! LMAO at “Squirting frosting on cup cakes is just like shooting a sniper rifle.”