It ain’t easy being sleazy
The thug life got hard for Sergio Fernando Solorzano-Vasquez the other day when he thought that stealing a car from two 90+ years-old sisters would be an easy enough caper. But I guess the ladies liked their car more than Solorzano-Vasquez had hoped they would;
Police say he jumped into their car and hid in the backseat when they went into a CVS store on Sunday morning.
When they came out, and got back into the car, Solorzano-Vasquez allegedly made his move. Police say he started swinging his knife and threatening the women, but he might not have expected what happened next.
Police say instead of simply giving in, the 94-year-old driver swung her arm back to hit and block the suspect while the 93-year-old sister got out and began to scream for help.
Apparently realizing that it wasn’t going to be an easy score, the man took off.
The attacker was seen running away from the scene on three different surveillance cameras at a gas station across the street. He was later located and taken into custody.
I guess folks are tired of being scared and frightened into submission. Thanks to Old Trooper for the link.
Just another reason why older women are SO FRIGGIN’ HOT!
The only thing that would have made it better would have been if the ladies had pulled out a pistol (legal or not) and shot his ass into the afterlife. What jury would convict 90+ y.o. grandmothers?
As the joke punchline puts it: “…If you’re going to have a senior moment, make it a memorable one!”
Conversation overheard in jail, later that night:
“Let’s see, mano…you were trying to jack two old gringa ladies, and they fought and ran your bitch ass off?”
I bet Sergio will spend a lot of nights biting his pillow after that bit of news spreads around the cell block.
Why do these rat bastages have to have Hispanic surnames?!? I bust my a$$ trying to make something of my Mexican self and all it takes is one story like this to flush everything I’ve done to turn it into a pile of crap.
This is almost as funny as the two assholes in CA who went in with guns drawn to rob a store and got chased out by the barking dog.
The CHIHUAHUA.
Just heard this on the news. It will no longer be so easy to be sleazy in North West Germany. I just heard on the TV News that the German State of Nordrheinwestfallen has outlawed the Hells Angles and raided and shut dwon all of their club houses.
I have to wonder why the authorities in other parts of Germany and the United States are so timid. I suggest that an even more interesting way to put the Hells Angles and the Banditos and Nomads and other criminal biker gangs out of business would be to put them under the control of law abiding citizens that have been in the FBI, Rangers and Spoecial Forces. If im remember correctly years ago a major union was placed under the control of the US government to weed the mafia out its influence in the union. Taking over the biker gangs would not set any precedents. Each day before the bikers went for a ride they would have to listen to an economics class given by Proffessor Hudson or Professor Potomac and each day when they got back listen to a sociology class given by Professor McKinney or Peltier to turn their damaged brains in to virtuos insturements of social improvement.
A program such as this should be a program that could unite conservatives and liberals.