Space Force wants wearable fitness trackers. What could go wrong?

| August 11, 2022

The Space Force is touting its “Holistic Health Assessment” program as its alternative to the other service’s physical fitness test regimens. As part of the program, they will encourage all their members to be wearing devices similar to FitBits by 2023 so they can gather and collate fitness data on their personnel. To now it has been pitched as a benign, “Uncle Sam wants to help you”, sort of thing. Isn’t that nice?

The Holistic Health Assessment, the Space Force’s answer to the military’s yearly physical fitness tests, has been pitched by the service as a revolutionary way for Guardians to stay in shape year-round. The Space Force hopes troops will routinely wear fitness trackers similar to Apple Watches or Fitbits by 2023 to keep them focused on their health all the time, instead of getting out of shape and then dreading a punitive — or possibly career-ending — evaluation.

The plans pitched during the road show to keep Guardians on track for the new fitness program included monitoring service members’ devices to make sure they’re getting around 300 minutes a week in purposeful physical activity, keeping tabs on their muscle oxygen consumption levels and watching their height-to-waist ratio to make sure they’re maintaining a healthy physique.

A “Guardian Resilience Team,” a group of service members at each base who specialize in fitness and training, would oversee the data brought in by the wearable fitness devices to track who is falling behind.

The Guardians’ data will be analyzed and classified under a color code — red if they’re failing, amber if they’re average and green if they’re on track and surpassing expectations, officials said during the presentation.

When the program was pitched initially, Chief Master Sergeant of the Space Force Roger Towberman told back in March he wanted to get away from “disciplinary, punitive interventions” because of a failed annual test. But it became clear during the “road show” that Guardians who are lagging behind could be punished.

One official who presented during the road show — and did not identify themselves on the presentation recording — said she understands that some people’s fitness may fall by the wayside with different life situations but noted, “If somebody is red for a quarter, that’s when the command is going to get involved.”

Other proposed parts of the Space Force’s Holistic Health Assessment that have not been widely discussed would encourage regular sleep patterns, promote a balanced diet and decrease alcohol consumption, as well as set time for meaningful meditation and reflection.

Military Times

Service members (“Guardians”) have already raised questons over privacy, data retention, whether this could be used prejudiciously for things like VA claims. There are also OPSEC questions, like having entire units transmitting en masse aiding enemy location finding.

Category: "The Floggings Will Continue Until Morale Improves", Big Pentagon, Space Force

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The Stranger

Here we go again…sure, why not transmit a bunch of data around? Who cares what it is, the enemy can infer things just from activity. Damn, these folks are fucking dumb.


Wiring up the Space Force troops for 24/7/365 surveillance.

What could possibly go wrong.

RGR 4-78

I wonder if Nancy Pelosi’s husband is working with his ChiCom business partners to supply the devices to Space Force?


I’m in. But they need to make it enabled to deliver electric shocks if they enter say into a McDonalds, Pizza Hut or pay check loan pawn shop. Also for every hour spent in the gym with an elevated heart rate it delivers a convincing hand job or bean flick. They will be PT studs in no time.

1984 TV workouts were for posers. We are high tech around here.


So instead of getting paid to take someone’s duty, space forcers will now make some extra cash wearing other’s devices

RGR 4-78

Some E1 wearing 6 devices will look like a mobile orgy on the tracking map.


He has to support those three baby mommas somehow.

Hack Stone

That would be Space Baby Mamas. The base hospital is going to have to hire interpreters fluent in Klingon.


What about facilities that don’t permit PEDs?


Forget security, we need to keep these Guardians fit!


They had no problem letting Manning bring his CD player into the SCIF, why would there be a problem with some wearable smart device? /sarc

Old tanker

What is the space cadet’s version of 670-1? is a fitbit type device part of the recognized uniform? I would assume if they want everyone to wear one they probably need to make provisions to issue one IAW their uniform regs….


This is just so embarrassing.


For those who want to read about a still-recent ‘oops’ with such things:


I would so be running a huge totem pole shaped route with two loops at the base of it.


If the Navy can draw sky penises (peni?), ground forces can play too.

RGR 4-78

Pavement Penis.

President Elect Toxic Deplorable Racist SAH Neande

And in a “you can’t make this up”;
Chief Master Sergeant of the Space Force Roger (Ramjet) Towberman”
Anyone else besides myself remember Roger Ramjet, Hero of our Nation?

I remember him well! Along with Diver Dan, Johnny Quest, and all those saturday morning friends.


Race Bannon!


Race was a serious badass back in the day!

jeff LPH 3 63-66

I don’t know about this. Flash Gorden never had any of this high tech stuf and he beat Ming the Merciless on the planet mongo and saved the world.


Big Brother: Nothing to see here, move along.


The sensor will be rectal.

Skivvy Stacker

Well, okay, this will give our enemies all the information they need about our force….but, it’s COOL TECH! I mean, it’s just like having them on a computer game, dude! Pretty soon we’ll have them so we can hit re-set if they get killed…or something….


Next up, The prototype Hunger Games Injectable Tracker.


If you had good leaders…

Bill R.

I thought this issue was addressed several years ago when we were in Afghanistan and Iraq. It’s my understanding that it was believed to be a really bad idea.

A Proud Infidel®™

So, what cardio score will the Space Forcer that spanks his monkey twice a day get?


50% of what Commissar scores looking at pictures of RBG.


Anyone taking bets on whether these devices will be made in China?