Chris Sevier sues states for not recognizing his marriage
AnotherPat sends us a link to Alabama.com which tells the tale of lawyer Chris Sevier who is suing several states because they don’t recognize his marriage to his computer;
This is only the latest in a long string of such lawsuits filed by Chris Sevier, who describes his sexual orientation as “machinist.” Sevier has filed similar lawsuits in Texas and Utah and filed a suit in Colorado seeking to force a baker to make a wedding cake for him and his computer “bride,” according to multiple news reports.
Sevier filed a federal lawsuit in Alabama’s Northern District on Aug. 31 alleging his rights, along with the rights of individuals his complaint identifies as “an ex-gay” and “an ex-transgender,” were violated by Gov. Kay Ivey, Attorney General Steve Marshall and Blount County Probate Judge Chris Green.
Yeah, well, whatever. Sevir has been arrested for stalking and harrassing a seventeen-year-old girl, so, you know, he’s just a perv looking for attention.
Category: Dumbass Bullshit
Cocksucker.
Boom!
Apparently not anymore…..but…..$20 bucks is $20 bucks.
They should recognize his marriage to his room at the insane asylum!!!
This turd is a product of ass sex gone bad.
Well, it was only a matter of time before sh!t like this started coming out of the woodwork. When I brought up hypothetical scenarios like this to the more “progressive” individuals I know, they would retort “Oh, you’re being ridiculous! Nothing like [fill in the blank] will ever happen!”
I’m now off to launch myself into a volcano, because clearly society is completely off its rocker and the human race as we know it is over.
RGQ, I had a similar experience with my siblings and other leftists. I pointed out that with all the same sex marriage stuff, at no time did they offer or come up with a NEW definition of marriage, ALL they did was DESTROY the old one, leaving open the possibility for whatever definition anyone wanted to put up, just like this meat-gazing douche
Word.
I figured it’s only a few years before “machinist” becomes a more common orientation. But, you know, more like this than your whirring desktop.
He couldn’t wait?
Gives a whole new meaning to Machinist’s Mate doesn’t it?
Not that I don’t respect flange-heads….
Hey, I was an A Gang snipe(MMFN) on board the OKIE 3 but never had to carry around a fresh air chit. LOL.
Hey, just a thought, but maybe this is how “he who shall not be named” self identifies.. it’s more believable than the thought that any woman would actually put up with him… speaking of which, maybe i missed it, but what did you all do to him, I haven’t seen a post from him in days…
SHUSH!!!! Do not thou speaketh the name of the flabbergaster incarnate, lest thou be forced to live in a shoebox under a bridge.
Copy that EX, i was just curious.. I’ll shut up and go have a beer.
I thought he was more of a “manualist,” seeing as how he’s been known to beg his hand for a pity jerk…
I heard that even his imaginary friend filed a restraining order against him!
Oh look, it’s phil monkress on two legs !!!
Flussssshhhhhh….
Computer takes floppy disks?
Rim shot!!
So what’s next? If a phone, plate, or paper clip identifies as “human”, we have to treat it as such?
He looks High.
That might explain it.
Since the left lives abortion so much, any chance we can make them retroactive?
Serial frivolous litigant.
Sounds like he and Bernath need to hook up and go bowling together.
Machinist Mate
1 – He can make his own frakkin’ wedding cake. Get two boxes of cake mix, some commercial fondant and icing and decorator tips, and do it himself. But he’s so stupid, he’d eat the fondant and make a soup out of the cake mix.
2 – There are probably websites that sell sex toys for frustrated machine lovers. Redirect him to one of those.
3 – Attention whoring is getting really, really old from this whack job.
I couldn’t finish the article…..I knew the true entertainment would be here in the comments.
You folks never disappoint.
When he decides to go with a newer computer, I want his old one.
Then I will get my lawyer to sue him for divorce and the computer is going to want half of the community property and alimony.
I will help the computer to invest its part.
In his way of thinking, he should be arrested in most states.. His computer is probably less than 10 years old and has no say in what it can and can’t do.. That’s child slavery.. Based on his crazy way of thinking.
I thought he was being absurd to illustrate absurdity (as Rush puts it) until I read “identifies as ‘an ex-gay’ and ‘an ex-transgender'”. At that point I learned that he was just a fruitcake. If I were doing this to prove a point, I wouldn’t call myself gay in the process – ’cause I aint!
And how is he much different from all of those who “beat” their F5 keys every Friday. At least he is out in the open.
What happens if he decides that he wants some strange F5 key?
If the computer is used for porn,. can he divorce it for cheating on him?
(We won’t go for the cheap “hard drive” jokes.)
However, is getting a larger hard drive the equivalent of plastic surgery?
Does the motherboard of the computer have an Oedipus complex?
Is a flash drive that is inserted into the computer considered a sex toy?
If they have children, is the resultant child a micro SD card?
If external speakers are added, can that be considered a lack of fidelity? (Think about it.)
If the power supply fails, would Medicare cover that as a heart replacement procedure?
If he uses the computer for work, does the computer get wages and file a tax return?
Does the computer nag him by saying “would you like to play a game?” all the time?
Would he be considered a polygamist for having Siri on his iPhone and Alexa in the house?
Would the computer be protected in legal cases by spousal privilege?
So many questions…..
Just this?
-that- is one crazy mother(board)f#cker.
sounds like he watches gay porn on his compoopter while masturbating and fell in cyber luuuuv
Just another real sic unit
See what happens when cousins marry?!