Vernon Gabriel; The seven year-old SEAL

| January 7, 2014

Vernon Gabriel

Ya know how we always say that the phonies have stopped trying – well, Scotty quit trying on this guy who claims that he has been a SEAL since he was seven-years-old.

Vernon Gabriel war stories

He never heard of Don Shipley (although that might change), couldn’t remember his class number, couldn’t even remember which team he was with. I think he’s in Canada, he writes with an accent.

Category: Phony soldiers

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Instinct

He became a space shuttle door gunner at age 12, he was tall enough by then.

Eggs

A see a huge, huge bracket for the tournament this year.

Combat Historian

“Attention: Senior Chief Shipley, you’re needed on Concourse A…”

O-4E

The dumbass puts his phone number on FB

+1 204-451-9414

USMCE8Ret

Shitbag.

Hondo

Manitoba, eh? Truly a part of the Great White North!

Hope he didn’t leave his touque at home today. (smile)

O-4E

@Hondo

No need for the touque today. Staying home with a nice hot bowl of kraft dinner

Hondo

O-4E: probably a good thing, amigo. Even where I am, it’s bitter outside today.

O-4E

Hondo

-18 with a -41 wc right now

2 snow days in the Army so far…amazing!

I was at Drum 4 years and we had 3 the whole time I was there…and twice we were in the field when they closed post

Hondo

O-4E: not that cold here, but temp is in single-digits (windchill is purportedly subzero). And that’s rare for this area.

Hope you’re not at Drum now – parts of NY east of Lake Ontario are projected to get up to 4 feet of lake-effect snow today and tonight. Some of my relatives near Lake Erie are gonna get hammered, too. And I ain’t talking drinkin’. (smile)

O-4E

No…little farther west

We just got hit with the same system

I’ve lived here since PCSing from Drum on 2002 and this is the most snow I have seen here

OWB

So, he’s claiming to be a baby SEAL.

Is that better than claiming to be a full grown SEAL?

Ex-PH2

Gaa-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-adammit!

His pants are SO tight, his junk is trying to escape!

I’m tellin’ you, it’s the real deal when your own junk is so embarrased by association with you that it’s trying to blow your popstand.

Gaa-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-adammit!

I can’t stop laughing over this illiterate clown.

Ex-PH2

O-4E – Kraft dinner?

Durn burn it, I can give you ten recipes for a bodacious batch of mac and cheese, including one with bacon, and you’re eating something out of a box?!?!?!? Next, you’ll be telling me you eat baked beans out of a can. This is sad. Just sad.

MCPO NYC USN Ret.

A seven year old claiming to be a SEAL … that is good!

A grown man claiming to be a SEAL when he was seven years old … that is bad!

Any questions?

Carry on!

O-4E

@ PH-2

You ever been around Canadians? That is what they colloquially refer to as boxed mac-n-cheese..”Kraft Dinner”

My buddy at Drum had a Canadian GF. She’d come stay for the weekend and we would have to make a trip to the commissary to get her a case of “kraft dinners”

Ex-PH2

O-4E, that’s what my mother called it, too, but she was from southern Wisconsin. Must be something in the water. My cousins all have accents that make them sound like Canadians.

MCPO NYC USN Ret.

I just read all the jibberish at Scotty’s page.

This guy is one bat shit friggin’ crazy Canadanian!

Funny too … he does write with an accent!

MGySgtRet

My youngest daughter is seven and she just completed Marine Corps Special Operations selection. She is a trooper!!! When she is 8 she wants to become a Green Beret!! Kids!!

SGT W

Well, if he’s a baby SEAL then he’s subject to clubbing.

MCPO NYC USN Ret.

@ 21 … Brilliant!

Ex-PH2

He’s illiterate, but he claims he’s got a ‘master’s in social meda’? What is THAT? Do you get that out of a Cracker Jacks box?

Wow. I have seldom run into someone about whom I could actually say that he’s dumber than a box of rocks.

Green Thumb

Somebody needs to let Eric Estrada that someone is fronting.

jonp

YOUGU-FUCKIN-SLAVIA???

Ebonics rule!

thebesig

“Disability, got hit by a druck” – Vernon Gabriel

Is that a truck with a drunk driver in it? Or is that the testing equipment? Did he have a nightmare of getting ran over by a truck in the shape of a duck? Maybe a truck driven by a duck?

I can’t wait to see the phony seal of the week job on him. 😀

Hondo

thebesig: I think “druck” is French-Canadian English for “truck” – as in, “eet by ze druck”. But I could be wrong.

rb325th

Dude is as bright as a brick… he should get together with William Derek Church the Round Ranger. I mean hell, if our “SEAL” friend above was through Buds before age 7, him and Derek ought to be able to conquer the world.

JarHead Pat

Awesome,they are just coming out of the woodwork.

FatCircles0311

Not sure if complete crack pot or super troll. Probably just 20lbs of shit in a 10lbs bag.

Green Thumb

Dude looks like a popinjay.

Ex-PH2

This guy who is so numb between the ears that he poses in the snow in a banana hammock.

Seriously, he isn’t numb just between the ears.

David

To quote George Hamilton, “you speak with a very pronounced assent”.

Mustang2LT

Hey, this guy’s legit. Seven in seal years equals about 21 in hman years! B-)
/do I really need to put a sarc tag here?

2/16

His number is no longer in service… chicken shit cocksucker

Common Sense

@14 – My first thought too Ex! The pressure must be cutting off the blood to his brain (and the rest of him!).

He also reminds me of Ponch, from CHiPS

OldSargeUSAR

@ PH2

I’ll take that recipe for mac & cheese mit bacon, Ja! Please!

As for these comparisons of douchebag Gabriel to Estrada… Give Eric a break. He’s a good guy.

MrBill

Dude was so badass that he retired with 20 at 10. Chihuahua years, you know.

EO1SeaBee(Ret.)

He’s sporting a camel toe that some girls would be jealous of.

Scotty

Vernon Gabriel, Why don’t you tell everyone here how President Bush Jr. Awarded you with the Medal of Honor !

Scotty

This idiot is 13 eggs shy of a bakers dozen !

A Proud Infidel

He once walked into a bar when he was a baby seal, and when the Bartender asked him “What’ll you have?”, he replied “ANYTHING BUT a Canadian Club on the rocks!”.

Maddie

Hey now, he is purty enough to be SF, right?

Doc Savage

This dain bramaged specimen was really chowing down on paint chips as a kid.

Really? I know the answer, but I still have to ask….how can anyone be so stupid to over look the simple math of being age 7 in the Armed Forces????

Henry

Dubya “probably” gave him the Medal of Honour [sic]??? Yeah, that kind of thing is hard to remember.

On top of everything else, his employer / business is a translation service. I hope “Operator” means that he operates some machine that has nothing to do with language. If this is his own small business, can you imagine what kind of translation you would get?

Green Thumb

Turd.

Henry

Update: Gabriel is “self-employed,” so I guess he does do the translating (unless he sub-contracts it out).

Verbum Traduccion y Edicion appears to be a loose affiliation of people who do translation. In Winnipeg, I’d look elsewhere.

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