In The Navy – Redux
NB: This is satire! It does fit well with my earlier post though. Thanks John A.
SECNAV Reintroduces Grog to the Navy
In a surprise announcement yesterday, Secretary of the Navy Ray Mabus reversed a key portion of the initiative known as “The 21st Century Sailor.” After the fleet-wide failure of his “breathalyzer on every quarterdeck” policy, Mabus announced that the Navy would not only do away with the newly installed devices, but bring back the tradition of alcohol rations. The announcement was all the more stunning as it came after a period of 24 hours in which no one could seem to find the Secretary.
“Today’s Sailors understand leadership and motivation,” Mabus said to reporters at the U.S. Naval Academy, who filed into Mahan Hall Auditorium for a hastily assembled press conference. “After spending the evening with the combat-leaders-in-training on the Academy’s Varsity Cheerleading Squad, exchanging ideas at various establishments around Annapolis, I became convinced we need a course change in our policy. We need spirit back in the U.S. Navy!”
Like bringing back the USS Constitution to full combat service this is one of those things that almost makes sense.
Although not ‘grog’ there were spirits carried on ships when I was in during the ’60s. During an UNREP (underway replenishment for the Army guys) a guy got tangled up in a cargo net and briefly dunked in the ocean. His was given a shot of something in a glass. This led to a discussion of just what it would take to warrant shots all around. Don’t remember the consensus reached.
Category: Geezer Alert!, Navy
Rations are GOOD.
What we brewed below deck was BAD!
Naval analysts agree that for the majority of Sailors, grog has a calming effect, whether they’re facing German U-boats or a discharge after 14 years in the service and no money towards a pension.
LMAO!
Rum, sodomy, and the lash.
Well, at least we got two out of the three.
“. . . after a period of 24 hours.. . ” Of course not. He’d fallen asleep and been replaced by a pod people. Hiiissssssssss.
Way back in the SVN thingie, we swore the Navy stole the best stuff first off the ships before it went to the Army or AF Commissaries. Army sold c-rations in their commissary. Found a can of hamburger once. Even the dog wouldn’t eat it. Nasty stuff. Beans and mother… were sort of ok.
No doubt they’ll bring back flogging, especially after that 50 shades of grey book is so popular…
There was medicinal alcohol available from the ship doctor. I heard what the whiskey was that was available to the Air Corps in WWII, but wasn’t something I drank so have long forgotten it. Wasn’t Johnnie Walker or 200 year old Scotch..
A few of the boys and I had brought on a water cooler jug filled with vodka, and cases of Aquafina that were filled with rum before our second deployment. We kept them in unmarked lockers down in berthing, and would bust it out occasionally when we were augmented on rotation (not on the watchbill). Other sailors did the same thing, and I know some machinists were even making hooch in the bilge out of grape juice.
Tradition dies hard in the navy. Bosuns still herald the captain’s announcements and pipe people on board, bells still sound out the time even though clocks have been invented, and sailors will still find a way to be drunk.
It’s not just sailors, teddy. Many a Soldier has found a way around General Order #1.
You guys just don’t know how tough it is at sea:
* 4 meals day (mid rats included).
* Air condition sleeping compartment.
* Matresses to sleep on.
* Plenty of storage space to store personal items and contraband.
* First run movies every night.
* Email.
* Frequent liberty at exotic ports of call.
* Fantail BBQ’s with entertainment.
* The coolest qweapons systems to operate.
In the Navy … You Can Sail the Seven Seas ….
In the Navy….sometime your fellow sailors do peculiar things…
http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=down+periscope&view=detail&mid=F5F614492F8BD77939C6F5F614492F8BD77939C6&first=0&qpvt=down+periscope
http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=down+periscope&view=detail&mid=A5BD523FD8F5AEA7DD68A5BD523FD8F5AEA7DD68&first=0&qpvt=down+periscope
especially the bubbledheads.
MCPO, If I was deployed I would be sending my cyber space ninja to give you a pink belly right now for that post.
@ 11 … Pink Belly, Aye!
Navy also has a policy of 2 beers after 90 days at sea. 90 day old formaldehyded Bud stored in the brig. Almost not worth it. Almost
Gee, I miss the good ol’ days, when pigs like the Birmingham did emergency blows and someone always forgot and was snoring in his rack…. or the crew of the Kitty Hawk made their very own film “Launch ‘Em”, which was later mortally wounded by Charlie Sheen, et al., in Hot Shots.