Sailors step up for widow
Edward sends us a link about Yvonne Nosik, the widow of Kenneth Nosik who died suddenly from a seizure while he was stationed in San Diego. The widow had no one to turn to when she needed someone to help bury her husband’s body since all of his friends were deployed;
So, his wife placed an ad on Craigslist looking for sailors to carry her husband’s casket. It didn’t take long before she got a response.
“I didn’t have nobody to call that was in military that could help me,” Yvonne Nosik said.
Of those who stepped up to help in her time of need, Yvonne Nosik said, “They showed me that my husband is not forgotten and that they leave no man behind.”
How many other professions would do that for someone they don’t know? Police and firefighters, aside.
Category: Navy
Agreed. Military and first-responders aside, probably no one. Plenty might attend, but few would carry.
I only just barely know what Craigslist is?
Put me down as skeptical? Could easily be a geezer thing?
“I didn’t have nobody to call that was in military that could help me”
He had no/zero/nil shipmates?
Clear skies and following seas regardless.
His shipmates were out on deployment. That’s what sailors do, they deploy, along with the Marines, Soldiers, and as much as it pains me to say, even the Airmen.
Hack Stone #3: I’d buy that explanation in a heartbeat save the simple question as follows.
If the USN has no mechanism in place for such events, why Craigslist?
I reckon “the Wife” in this case needed a megaphone?
What’s the surprise? We’re talking about military men and women! No one left behind.
If true, this is rather embarrassing for the Navy. The Casualty Assistance Calls Officer (CACO) for the Southwest Region is in San Diego. They are responsible for notification and assisting the family in making funeral arrangements.
Yat Yas 1833 #5: There it is!
kp #6: Thanks for the reference.
Yeah, Zero, there may be some geezer disconnect here. I know that youngsters these days turn to social media before talking to real people, but I, too, am wondering what we missed here. There are plenty of chaplains, his chain of command, family assistance programs and a multitude of others in the San Diego area who would have helped her in this situation.
On the other hand, in the midst of one’s rawest grief, simple tasks can become monumental, so I certainly won’t fault her for perhaps not absorbing information from those who would have helped her. It seems to have all turned out well.
RIP, sailor. And thanks to those who answered the call.
Something isn’t right here. When a service member passes (under any circumstances), a Casualty Assistance Officer is immediately assigned who helps the widow with arrangements. With an active duty soldier or sailor, the funeral detail is automatic (unless refused). She shouldn’t need to call anyone. If he’s active duty, his chain of command has to know he passed, unless they were totally negligent and reported him AWOL when he didn’t show up to work without checking with his wife.
A few years back, a family was in town here in the DC area to have their father’s ashes interred at Arlington. The ceremony was in the afternoon, so the family crossed the river into DC to visit a few of the monuments. It was at that point that DC lived up to its reputation as a proverbial shit hole when someone broke into their vehicle, and along with their luggage and other personal property, stole their father’s urn. No ashes for the ceremony, and as far as I know, they were never returned. Not directly related to this story, but if you ever come DC, you have been warned.
If this story is true, she may have been distraught enough to turn to Craigslist because it has a wide audience and it’s free, and she didn’t know what else to do. And maybe she just slipped through the cracks with the Navy on this.
I hafta say, that something doesn’t seem right here. Every ship, every squadron, every command that deploys has a detachment left behind in order to deal with these things, to act as an interface with those at home. It was that way when I was in, back in the dark ages, and it is still that way today.
As much as i feel pride for seeing my fellow shipmates step up, something isn’t kosher with this story. We need more data. 🙂
First thing I thought of was she might have been one of those wives whose husband always took care of everything, so she may have had no idea to talk to the Navy. Also, I noticed in the picture at the link that his Gunner’s Mate’s crossed cannons are inverted. Anyway, there’s definitely some info left out in the story.
Zero, all,
I saw this as a news bit early this AM on the local SD channel, and my gut reaction was shame, as in “where’s the damned Chief, CMC, and FRG, sleeping?”
Turns out Nosik left the Navy in November, 2011. With his old ship deployed, and him out, it’s no wonder there was no in uniform one to help out when he passed. Actually a pretty savvy move for his wife to use Craigslist.
On the good news side, he was an organ donor.
Quote from the local Fox station (http://tinyurl.com/8x44mx8):
“Nosik’s kidneys were donated to San Diego resident Ila Alhinn’s 17-year-old daughter. Alhinn attended Nosik’s funeral and called him a hero.
“She has a blood type that is rare. She’s been on the waiting list for 4 years; the longest ever at Children’s Hospital,” Alhinn said. “I’ve never met him, but I feel he’s still alive in our hearts and in our bodies. God bless his soul.”
His organs also helped saved the lives of two other San Diegans and another person in Los Angeles.”
In that case, God Bless him, and may the angels of His mercy comfort his family. It’s good to see that there were shipmates to step up and see that things were taken care of properly.
Fair winds and following seas, shipmate.
He did rate Funeral Honors and funeral directors are aware, especially in a place like San Diego. But good thinking on the wife’s part and BZ to the Sailors that stepped up as pall bearers.
http://www.militaryfuneralhonors.osd.mil/
Military Funeral Honors have always been provided whenever possible. However, the law now mandates the rendering of Military Funeral Honors for an eligible veteran if requested by the family. As provided by law, an honor guard detail for the burial of an eligible veteran shall consist of not less than two members of the Armed Forces. One member of the detail shall be a representative of the parent Service of the deceased veteran. The honor detail will, at a minimum, perform a ceremony that includes the folding and presenting of the American flag to the next of kin and the playing of Taps. Taps will be played by a bugler, if available, or by electronic recording. Today, there are so few buglers available that the Military Services often cannot provide one.
Not sure why you think it necessary to take a Gratuitous slap at the other Services -IMO the same response would result were it Army outside of Ft. Bragg, or USAF outside of Lackland.
Even assuming the story and facts are true.
Ah, the explanation that he was already seperated from the Navy explains away most of my misgivings.
@ #18: Ummm. Must have missed any Gratuitous slap at the other services, one of which would be mine, another Jonn’s. The choice of the Navy was that of the deceased. Evidently he had some reason for joining it rather than another branch of service. None of which relates to Jonn’s post. If you have a disagreement with the widow lumping all services together in her choice of the words “the military,” your argument is with her. Can’t speak for everyone, but I am fine with her having done that, and Jonn’s playing off that choice of wording.
Gads. This was a post to kinda make us collectively feel good about being part of “the military,” a fraternity which takes care of our own. Sometimes in interesting ways.
It’s clear we have people here who have never devoted a period of thier lives or thier whole life to something greater than themselves.
Any who defend the country internally or externally….large or small and no matter the time of service. Just because you were a Firefighter on 911 does not make others lesser. Any of them would get the same response. Call the VFW, American Legion….vets would show up without question, because we know it could have been one of us. She was our wife, our family. that’s why we do it. We all volunteered for different reasons but carried on for one. Our brothers and sisters.
I don’t expect civilians to understand it, but they should learn to STFU. It’s not thier place.
A brother or sister died. We are all lesser for it.
Chris H. #15: That timeline certainly cleared things up. Thanks.
Zero,
No problem, I though the clarity of later reports would help calm us all down.
Hooyah, go Navy!
Wow…goosebumps…That’s right…a Hoo-yah!! from the Hoo-ah!
For ships, there is an Ombudsman who is a spouse.
Something in the milk ain’t clean.
For all of you who’ve said “something ain’t right”, you’re right. Something isn’t right. I knew both Kenny and Yvonne. Kenny was not retired or active duty. He had gotten kicked out of the Navy last fall. Yvonne is a shameless liar who brings discredit to the Navy and those who’ve served honorably by fooling people into thinking her husband was retired or active duty and that the Navy dropped the ball on this one. RIP Kenny and good on you for being an organ donor.
I lived with both Ken and Yvonne. I just had to reply to the comments being made. Ken loved Yvonne. Yvonne never told the media he was retired, lol he was to young to be retired. She said he got out of the military and she didn’t know who to call to help her with carrying him to lay to rest. His wife is the one that made the decision to donate his organs to help save those in need. I can say those two loved each other. I feel bad for Yvonne I know personally that she is grieving and missing Ken. Shame on those that take the time to write false statements. Rest in Peace Kenny !
Something does not add up here. The funeral director would know enough to get in contact with his unit if nothing else or at least the nearest base CACO. If she knows her husband is deployed on a ship…there is a group if I am not mistaken of ships personnel wives who could have assisted her. If he is deployed the Red Cross would have been contacted by the ships command structure and could have at least put her on to the correct people. All that being said..it might just be possible that her husband handled everything in her marriage and she is at a loss as to the next step. I do applaud those that stood up and were present for his service. ]Bravo Zulu shipmates And thank you for remembering the organ donation..It showed a great deal of humanity in a time of stress.
My apologies after reading some of the earlier comments here I realized I have went off with some bum dope. Iinitially was under the impression he was active duty Navy and was deployed with ship. Again my apologies for the wrong info being put out by me.