Nike Launches New Kaepernick Collection

| October 29, 2023


To be fair, Nike is calling it a “capsule” and not a “collection.” In the parlance of fashion and sports memorabilia, Nike deems “capsule” more appropriate. I’m trying to convey an accurate image to all you knuckle-draggers out there so strip me down naked and beat me with barbed wire if you take exception to my terminology.

Outkick had a hilarious, albeit honest, take on this.

NIKE CAN’T HELP ITSELF, RELEASES A NEW COLIN KAEPERNICK COLLECTION THAT NO ONE WILL BUY
by MATT REIGLE | October 28, 2023

Nike unveiled a new capsule from washed-up ex-NFL QB Colin Kaepernick.

Yes, they did this in late 2023, months — perhaps even years after Kaepernick brought even an ounce of cache to the table.

Which begs the question: why the hell does Nike keep doing this? And another question: what the hell is a capsule?

First, a “capsule” appears to be what Nike calls something that isn’t quite a “collection.”

As for why Nike thinks Kaepernick even needs a capsule, there’s of course a pretty simple answer to that question and it lies in the Swoosh’s notorious no-holds-barred wokeness streak.

“Colin Kaepernick’s optimistic hope for the future is rooted in his belief in our collective power to effect change,” Nike’s website reads.

He believes in the collective power to effect change by selling shirts with what appear to be doodles from the cover of a middle schooler’s Trapper Keeper on them for $50 a pop?

Interesting. Activism sure has changed, hasn’t it?

Nike Continues To Work With ‘NFL Free-Agent’ Kaepernick Despite A Complete Lack Of Bringing Anything To The Table

The funniest part comes in the next line when Nike describes Kaepernick. There are a lot of ways to do that — hack, grifter, guy who can’t take a hint — but Nike went with “NFL free-agent quarterback and civil rights activist.”

Look, at this point, if Colin Kapernick is an NFL free agent, so are you and I.

The good news is that I can now consider myself an NFL free agent as well.

Rumor has it that the Kap7 Sweat Shirt has a detachable crying towel and the Kappy Jimmy Jumper pants have extra reinforcement sewn into the knees.

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2banana

Well, it’s silly. But who really cares?

And is there a military aspect to the story?

AW1Ed

A patriot aspect perhaps. Editors are encouraged to post articles they think will be interesting to our audience in order to promote comments and keep up interest in the site between Valor Thieves.

Military stories are posted as they become available. Stars and Stripes reports on how Camp Grayling has improved its facilities for women. I’m sure this is commendable and necessary but hardly top of my list for posting.

Believe it or not I do appreciate feedback and take criticism onboard. I may ultimately ignore it, but I do listen.

RGR 4-78

Who?

Hate_me

That guy who once lost a Super Bowl. Full stop.

RGR 4-78

Is Dan Marino still doing those commercials?

UpNorth

WGAS???

5JC

Just need to know if knee pads are included. They are not just for shitting on your country.

Roh-Dog

Will these must-have’s for anyone with a room temperature IQ be made with slave labor in China, or slavery in Bangladesh?

Since he’s still in shape, how the fuck is his military draft status looking?

Joe’s World War is going to need bodies and I’d freaking love to see this guy get himself some.

Hate_me

At least Cassius Clay was a champion.

Odie

I guess the term “capsule” is the equivalent of tryout. No guarantees.

Anonymous

Capsule? Like a suppository?

26Limabeans

Colin? Like a colon?

Odie

Well, he has kind of been a whiney ass, so if the suppository fits….

ExRM

Capsule like pill? If so is this a White Pill? Black Pill? Doesn’t really affect me, just thought “Huh – that’s irrelevant to my life, how can I giggle at it and move on?”

Prior Service

Krapperdick is clutching that football like he’s still got a chance. Sit down, dude, even the Woke-F-L doesn’t want a part of you on a team.

SFC D

Colon Kaepernick grew up with more “White Privilege” than 99% of white kids in the history of the United States. He refers to the NFL as modern slavery, yet begs to be back on their plantation. He gets paid an obscene amount of money to promote woke ideals for a company that makes billions from actual slave labor. That’s far too much hypocrisy and bullshit for this pasty white paddy to swallow. Fuck Kaepernick and Fuck Nike.

fm2176

He did was 99+% of others don’t, make it to a major professional sport league. The NFL is “modern slavery”, alright. Let’s see, most start out playing football (or their sport of choice) early in life, going through high school and ideally getting a free ride through college based on their athletic abilities. At some point, sometimes in high school, but usually while in college, an NFL scout may deem them worthy of consideration for a contract. They’ll start at 3/4s of a million dollars (according to MSN) minimum, though they could easily start with a multi-million-dollar contract. They make millions, while their teams are worth billions. If they are good enough, or if they are able to become known outside of the sports world like Copanickel, they stand to make much more money in endorsements and sponsorships.

MarineDad61

SFC D,
His recent choice of field workout t-shirt.
Because of his “Roots”?

CK KK T.jpg
Odie

One would think if you’re applying for a job, you would dress more for the occasion.

SFC D

One would think if you were applying for a job, you wouldn’t publicly badmouth the prospective employer.

Odie

True that. I completely missed that part.

SFC D

Sure. Look how well “Roots” turned out. Alex Haley was as big a fraud as Kaepernick.

Green Thumb

I was old school IN.

My insertion point has been stretched to at least 5 inches wide and twelve deep.

Give it to me. I love it. Just bring flavor.

I do not even have a sensual or emotional reaction to this self-aggrandizing nonsense. Not “Big” enough.

What a clown. One would assume he had learned by now.

Turd.

KoB

In other related National Felon League News, that most of us don’t care about either, my Grand Daughter made mention that she was trying to watch the Taylor Swift NFL Sky Box Tour and it kept getting interrupted with a football game.

Odie

They made mention on the news tonight that the cheifs lost to Denver, and no Taylor swift in site.

Wait for the swift fans to claim kelce is a nobody without Taylor being around.

Daisy Cutter

She’s the Chief’s muse.

Last edited 1 year ago by Daisy Cutter
Odie

Rim shot.

MarineDad61

ICYMI, the New York Jets are now 4-3.
Without Aaron Rodgers.
Without Kap.

[Colin Kaepernick writes to NY Jets offering to join practice squad]
Sep 28, 2023

Last edited 1 year ago by MarineDad61
BlueCord Dad

We almost lost that game to a team running their 3rd string QB who they didn’t allow to throw the football. We stink on ice.

Odie

Isn’t Jets an acronym for Just Enjoy The Suck? I think I saw it on a fans shirt as they were doing a pre game show.

No-one can say Jets fans don’t have a sense of bumor.

Av8or33

Just end the season

Old tanker

Sorry but really, who gives a crap? Either about nike or craperdick?

26Limabeans

Toilet brush.

Green Thumb

What a fucking clown.

rgr769

Riddle me this, when did this supposed quarterback ever win a game by completed passes?

A Proud Infidel®™

What’s next, Colin Kaepernick signature Knee pads?

11B-Mailclerk

Shitty shoes only posers will buy, celebrating a shity poser no one will buy.

Call him “Foo”.

If the Foo shits, wear em.

Deckie

Oh man this clown is just DYING to stay relevant — not that he ever was. He sucked on the field and spent most of his time benched anyway 😂😭