Lock Up Your Spam?

| August 3, 2022

Spam Anti-theft Protection

Retail crime has been on the rise throughout the US for the past five years, with organized criminal rings targeting stores everywhere. The National Retail Federation reports that store losses mounted from $453,940 per $1 billion in sales in 2015 to $719,458 in 2020.

Retailers and LEOs are searching for methods to help stem the thievery.

Enter high security Spam.

With theft on the rise, these are the ‘hot products’ – including Spam – that drug stores are most likely to lock up

Jordan Hart

  • Drug stores are targeted by thieves for the variety of ‘hot products’ they offer.

  • Companies opt for plastic anti-theft cases as employees are prohibited from stopping shoplifters.

  • Store security is focused on the ‘vital few’ over the ‘trivial many,’ expert says.

As inflation rises, concerns about theft are increasing, too — and stores are opting for more security to address the issue.

Spam, the canned meat product priced at $3.99 for 12 ounces, is the latest item to be locked up in an anti-theft case at a Duane Reade location in New York City.

A can of Starkist Tuna — $1.89 — is also locked up at the city’s Port Authority bus depot, located in an area where crime is up 52%.


Grand larceny has gone up 41% in New York along with robbery and burglary going up 34% and 36%, respectively, .

The most commonly stolen items from stores include cigarettes, over-the-counter medications, contraceptives, liquor, teeth-whitening strips, and health and beauty products.


I could note work boots and Father’s Day cards are markedly absent from the hot list, if I were making unkind remarks. Easy fix, though. If they want to curb Spam theft, offer the public free samples.

Hat tip to Ex for the inspiration.

Category: "Teh Stoopid", Crime, Government Incompetence, Guest Link

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Vote Democrat for more in November!


There may be vikings involved here


“Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam…”

The Stranger

That, or Hawaiians! Apparently they’re quite fond of it, if the Adam Sandler movie “50 First Dates” is any indication.


I asked a Hawaiian co-worker why spam was so popular with his people. He says “You puckin’ haoles got us all hooked!”

President Elect Toxic Deplorable Racist SAH Neande


Oh yeahhhhh





Spam? I’d go for the Dinty Moore beef stew myself.


File under “When you vote (D) and your city becomes a third-world shithole.”






I’d edit the graphic to replace “Joe Biden” with “Democrats” – he is just a tool – a virtually inanimate, inarticulate tool.

Hack Stone

Locking up certain products that are targets of thieves is racist.


And this is why CVS is leaving cities where DA’s refuse to hold shoplifters accountable.


Menthol cigarettes come to mind.
Salems, Newports, Kools etc.


Remember folks, when you taper payments to terrorists they tend to get more terrorist-y.

Dropping eSNAP plus inflation, times failure to lock up antisocials, equals chaos squared… for now.

Got larder and means to protect it?

jeff LPH 3 63-66

Cumshawed Spam, the favorite lunch of the Philly Naval Ship yard Yard Birds grilled on an I-Beam using a cutting torch.

Hack Stone

The Hormel Meat Company Customer Service Division is really on the ball. They call Hack Stone at least five times a day to ensure that can of Spam in the cupboard is still good.

Hack Stone

If you notice Hack’s call log, looks like Hormel set up a satellite call center in Bethesda Maryland. They got a good deal on an available facility on Wilson Lane, but it took them forever to remove the empty bottle of generic MD-2020 and the stench of failure.

A Proud Infidel®™

You gots it good Hack Stone, MY PHONE keeps teasing me with notices of “Potential Spam” when a stranger calls!

USMC Steve

Grand Theft Spam in New York Shitty? Oh how rich.


For the record, I am the personal owner of two cans of Spam that are past their expiration date by 3 years. If the SHTF, I plan to use them as bargaining tools or for breakfast hash browns with onions.

All Hail SPAM!!!


Welcome Home, Mi’Lady…you have been missed! I see your two expired cans and raise you three cans (with real Hormel BACON) exp, Sep ’24 Jan ’25 (x2). Had four cans (paid $1.50 ea on a manager special @ K Roger last spring) dtd Jan ’25. Used two of them for SPAM and eggs with grits for some troops that had never had it. Right tasty, it was. My SHTF provisions include multiple canned goods products and a 180 day supply from My Patriot Supply, Weirling Meats, and my cast iron cookware.

Does this mean the next time you do us up a Thursday are for Cooking Thread, the recipes will feature that Special Process Army Meat?

All Hail Spam! Aw to Hell with Ham & muthers.


Nah! Next cooking flustercluck be spicy and full of beans. Have some cornbread and butter ready and waiting for it.


Good to see you back, Ex-PH2.
We have deeply missed the presence of the Lioness of TAH.

Happy to see you back among the Deplorables again.


I love you, too. Just proves I’m not dead yet.

Hack Stone

Setting the Wayback Machine to a few decades ago.


Hack Stone

You just know that the economy is doing great under the Biden – Harris Administration when retailers have to lock up Spam. At least we can still afford Soylent Green.


Bring in your pets at night too? Maybe also: “hide yo kids, hide yo wife, and hide yo husband ’cause they [eatin’] e’rybody out here.”




Try offering an open can of Spam to one of those giant drooling bugs in the “Aliens” movie and see what happens. Probably throw it at you.