RIP, SFC Jonn Lilyea (Pinned as first post)
Well, we all end the Land Nav course of life someday, and for Jonn, that day was yesterday. He had a heart attack and passed away at the hospital. All men die, not all men truly live. Jonn did though, Lord knows Jonn did.
Wish I knew something to say to help with the pain, but after a sleepless night and some decidedly non-manly sobbing, I just don’t even know what to say. He was a friend, he was a mentor, and I’ll miss him. From meeting my wife to getting my job to the son I named after Jonn, I pretty much owe him in some part for everything I have, and it’s not a debt I take lightly. (Somewhat humorously, my last actual conversation with Jonn was about how his namesake, Ransom Jonn Seavey is a fat happy kid who just plays….until Moana comes on and then dude sits there all starry eyed. I postulated that giving him the name must have made him love what Jonn always called lovingly the “Little Brown Women.”)
As twisted as it is, I’ll never forget the exact moment that Jonn and I bonded. I was blogging at The Sniper, and he had this enterprise going, but the old schoolers will remember that if we got 10 comments back then than the post was on fire. But “Army Sergeant” invited the two of us to Winter Soldier, and although I *internet knew* Jonn, I didn’t *really* know him. We got to the hearings and the IVAW people segregated us from everyone else and gave us full time minders that literally read our posts as they went up. We were both almost at the bailing point when one guy got up and told some asinine story about how they blew up an old lady with a Mk 19, even though she was bringing them groceries. The story was so preposterous on the face of it that Jonn and I started guffawing. Here we were in a room full of dirty old 60’s hippies who were crying and Jonn and I were laughing so hard we started crying too.
I’m not going to go through his whole bio, you guys know it probably as well or better than I do. He was a hero in every sense of the word, but the most amazing thing was that dude was harder than iron, but he had a soft spot, which was forgiving but just as no-nonsense. He didn’t care what anyone did in the military but was grateful for that service, and never valued his own service higher than anyone else’s. The way he became the IVAW whisperer and helped some of those guys out was the epitome of what the brotherhood of veterans was all about. Sure, he’d give them no end of shit, but if they needed help Jonn would drop whatever he was doing and see that they got that help.
Nothing has been locked down as far as a service. We know he wanted to be buried in his uniform in Arlington, a place I’ve been to many times with him. As things become clearer I’ll let you guys know what’s up. Ditto the blog, we’ll talk about that after we’re done grieving.
If you are a person of faith, I’d ask you to pray for Jonn’s family during this time of profound mourning. If you are a warrior, drink to our friend as he makes his way to Valhalla. They’ll probably make him the sergeant at arms there so he can toss out the phonies that show up uninvited with ludicrous stories of Top Secret derring-do.
As I sat there last night remembering all the times I’d spent with Jonn I thought of Invictus, which fits Jonn to a T.
Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.
In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.
Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds and shall find me unafraid.
It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate,
I am the captain of my soul.
RIP buddy. We love you.
Category: Arlington National Cemetary, We Remember
When to the sessions of sweet silent thought,
I summon up remembrance of things past,
I sigh the lack of many a thing I sought,
And with old woes, new wail my dear time’s waste:
Then can I drown an eye, unused to flow,
For precious friends hid in death’s dateless night,
And weep afresh love’s long since cancelled woe,
And moan the expense of many a vanished sight.
Then can I grieve at grievances foregone,
And heavily from woe to woe tell o’er
The sad account of fore-bemoanèd moan,
Which I new pay as if not paid before.
But if the while I think on thee, dear friend,
All losses are restored and sorrows end.
– Sonnet 30, W. Shakespeare.
Man, I come on here and find this…and it breaks my heart as it does many of us.
Jonn aka SFC Lilyea, thank you…for being who you were. Thank you for the legacy you provided us, an example to follow, to believe in, to give to our world honor, integrity and truth.
We won’t forget you…and these are not damned onions around, these are real tears from all of us.
Until we meet again….and in the meanwhile, keep my father out of trouble up there and the rest of those of us who lived a life worthy of honor and memory.
Damn.
The Pineywoods NCO, one of many carrying on Jonn’s torch.
I never met Jon but I considered him a friend. Godspeed Jonn 😢
My God, I just read this post and am shocked beyond words.
I don’t know what to say except thank you, Jonn for all that you’ve done for all of us and for all Veterans.
I’m blown away and truly saddened.
TSO…a beautiful statement above.
Sorry…one more thing.
Back in late June, I was notified by the VA (Northport, NY) that my 40% rating was raised to 100% permanent SC disability for PTSD, hearing and muscle damage from back in May 1968.
I noted that the outsourced doctors (not VA personnel) took 5 weeks to complete the entire process – from the first exam to notification.
He was very complimentary and happy that all went so smoothly.
I don’t know who I can write to in the future to tell of such an important event in my life.
I’m still in shock…and praying for Jonn and his loved ones.
Having a very nice Montecristo cigar and a Bullit Bourbon in Jonn’s honor.
LIright47: Feel free to come here to share your news, both good and bad, with us.
Thank, HMC.
I found this poem that I read at a hunting buddy’s funeral a few years back.
Do not stand at my grave and forever weep.
I am not there; I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn’s rain.
When you awaken in the morning’s hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and forever cry.
I am not there. I did not die.
This is the poem I was trying to think of and planned to post after reading the other comments. Thank you for beating me to it.
God bless and watch over your family, Jonn.
He’s a man worth eulogizing and will be missed.
RIP Jonn, you will be missed. Your sense of humor was awesome.
Just came on to find this out.
RIP John. Rest easy. You fought the good fight.
OK guys and gals and I don’t often post from home but I’ve had a few shots (only the ones I’ve allowed myself plus one for Johh tonight as I’m trying to step off the wagon.) Not that any of you fucks can even give a rats fats ass but this is not a real moment. Please bear with me. I have taken a real step back and read a lot of this in the last 4 or 5 hours but when I have a clear head today and past my shock and horror of something that I think that this we all loosely binded us daily and thought was either indestructible or infinite I am going to try to share this clear although headily. (SP) Have we not seen Jonn and Mark and Dave, et al, point many of us and those that we have come here to review and anoint in the TAH way for Stolen Valor, and beyond as the points to review? https://valorguardians.com/blog/?p=39711 We have the TAH FAQ which is posted as a kind of introduction to new folks and also a warning to dumb asses that have been posted here as a warning here as behavior which they should not consider to partake. https://valorguardians.com/blog/?p=39711 We have the TAH Bingo card which I kind of created with your help as a funny thing. (OFFICIAL TAH BINGO CARD®™ /FREE with every deployment of an equal or greater value The Continent of Insults®™ https://imgur.com/nGqi3aR) With of my creativity and your help, I have created the Continent of Insults with which *we* could not have done that without you dickheads and MUCH, Jonn’s indulgence. (Which I wanted to post here and *FUCK DEATH* because I would curse it because I thought he/she was a giant DOUCHE!!!) However, After taking a few hours and gutting this out and realizing I have not lost nearly as many folks as all of you have or some of you folks that are younger or whatever haven’t lost as many folks, OR, now with social media, we are so more so connected to many… Read more »
Chip, I spent a good deal of time today searching for something that expresses it for me, and it’s this:
He should have died hereafter.
There would have been a time for such a word.
Cut off too soon, long before it was time, with no clue that it was coming, and the shock of loss always hits each person differently.
You take these stages one at a time, no rushing through it, and repeat them if necessary, and at some point, the bruises become less and less painful.
I am hugging you m’lady as I am sure you are hugging me back.
I will straighten your bed and fluff your pillow this am as we both need to try to sleep but fitfully knowing that we are one less is this great existence, on this plane. I know you are a sister of my Seven or more Realms. (Me thinks you are but a step or more ahead of me *wink* )
Thank you for those links, Chip, as a newbie I was not privy.
Well said Senior.
Thanks for everything Jonn, RIP.
Sending our thoughts with Jonn’s family in this time. Hit me unexpectedly but I know it will have him them much harder. Much respect – for those who go where those of us who cannot don’t.
And excuse they typos and the words that you read through that are not there.
I’m still dealing with as are many of you and I still think, Monday and the days tome come, we’ll be dealing with things to come and lets hold on, come together and do what we need to do to press on. Let’s not think about this right now but hang tough, remember what TAH is all about and remember what we were yesterday, last week , last month last year and whenever you realized that you were part of this family.
Jonn would expect us to take a moment or two, but think what he would say to you when he would expect you to step up and gut it out and PRESS THE FUCK ON.
I didn’t know Jonn except here and one e-mail, but I know if I ever got in a situation where we had to get down to it, he’d get straight in my face and jack my shit up if I wasn’t squared away and I’d not hesitate for a second. That’s being said from a retired E-8 SMSgt. (4 USAF/19 USAFR)(and that goes for many of you guys/gals too here). I’d like to think of you as family, but at the very least, *friends*
I’m proud to be associated with all of you.
Screw the typos…every word was from your heart.
You and TSO (and others) said what we are not capable of saying.
ChipNASA,
Thanks much brother for putting down your thoughts and laying your feelings out there. Words cannot express the sense of loss the the Lilyea family are going through, nor what Jonn’s extended TAH family is going through as well. This is one of those “This really really sucks ass” situations.
I stopped imbibing alcohol 34 years ago. A young Dinotanker as a 25 year old 2LT dodged a great big self induced dumbshit bullet, I took away the lesson that I liked booze (especially Irish Whiskey) way too much, but I had a whole life ahead of me and why throw my life and USAR hopes down the drain? Long way of saying Im here if you need a shoulder.
I went through this a couple of years ago, we were out in the bomb pit training a ARNG civil support team, one of the observers was from Montana and had known someone who I look at as my main officer mentor. CPT M had died from cancer and I had no clue. Hit by a M60A3 does not describe how I felt, and like last Friday, I was out there in the Washington desert with tears filling my eyes and leaking down my face. BG L. said, “Pete would have wanted to you to drive on”. And as you said up above, Jonn would want us all to drive on.
I never met Jonn, but I like that picture that goes with this post. He looks like a helluva guy. He must have trained a lot of NCO’s and officers. It would have been an honor to serve with him.
If in any small way I can help TAH continue to march. Im here.
Hang in there Chip (and all us all).
The Chief Petty Officer’s Mess aboard Camp Lemonnier, Djibouti, with our French Senior NCO Brothers and Sisters, will be toasting our fallen Brother tonight.
Well shit!!
God speed and thank you
Like all of you, I am sad beyond words. Silly as it seems, I felt Jonn would be here forever. Maybe, because of the community he built he will be. I’d like to think so.
My deepest condolences to Jonn’s family. My deepest. Kind sir, please look after my boy for me.
I have a phrase running through my brain on an endless loop… one many here have on a document in their possession that seems contradictory to what I believed…
Nothing Follows
Shocked in a word. RIP
What a loss that can never be duplicated or replaced. Try as we may, it will never be the same without Jonn. He always took the time to say thank you for personal gits to him,which he so graciously accepted. Once when recovering from that last heart attack he took the time to say, “You’re not going to let a little heart attack get you down are you”? Often I have pushed the boundaries of decency. Not long ago he made a personal comment about a series of post that just went too far, but he merely reminded me that we had discussed the matter a day earlier and that he expected better. He always knew the score, but rarely (other than with POSERS) made a big deal out of things that were carried too far. Regret to say I never personally met him, but these emails we all sent went to one whom we all respected and understood as an exceptional person. Give the man credit for allowing the grief that came with running such a web site few beyond those of us who write know all he suffered. But always he knew he was on track exposing phonies, and that they needed exposing by the likes of him. Funny how you come to respect and love someone you never ever met, yet Jonn was that kind of unique person using the web site and emails to show us the righteous path. May you rest in peace now Jonn. Your days of being forever vilified by those who were rightfully outed, and the many personal battles you endured made you all the better man whom all of us could and did look to him as our leader. Jonn will be forever remembered as the kind of person that knew he had a job to do, and he excelled as no others could or would. You will be sadly missed brother Jonn. May God show you a softer and less difficult road ahead. The only thing I can say for certain at this point is that Brother Jonn is in… Read more »
An afterthought occurred to me in the middle of the night. Jonn Lilyea was a man who accomplished something we could and should wish for as individuals. A very important character trait was held close to Jonn’s heart. In spite of having received success and notoriety, Jonn never went out of his way seeking recognition. That in itself is one of the true marks of a total and complete giver, something all politicians and well-known people too often share spending their entire life begging for attention. The Jonn Lilyea we knew was far too respected to lower himself to that level. What more could a person represent to set an example of living with character, respect, and integrity?
Well this sucks.
Funny guy that didn’t pussy foot around. He will be missed.
I’ve been reading all the posts here throughout the day. It is one of those occasions where someone cannot turn away. Coming to this site was my first order of agenda starting at 0400 hours.
While I never knew the man and only exchanged a couple of emails I quickly grew to respect his mission.
I truly hope his legacy survives here at this site that he took so much pride in.
oh Lord….RIP, SFC…
We will see you in Valhalla, brother. Thanks for bringing us together.
-Ryan
I never met you Jonn. But a heartfelt thanks for giving us this forum. It was a place where I could time travel back to when I was young and a soldier. Rest in peace and thanks for serving our nation. God’s Dustoff has left the LZ, enroute with Jonn to a far better place.
RIP Jonn. Though the world is a lesser place, we still have the lessons you taught us. You are not gone.
May the Angels of His Mercy bring solace to his family, and all who knew him.
Jonn was a friend, and someone who was happy to help me with advice whenever I needed it. I will miss him dearly, but will also look forward to the day when we can swap stories again.
Fair winds and following seas.
Damn, RIP brother. Prayers to the family.
RIP
RIP SFC Lilyea. The world will be less fun.
Jorge
Well, damn. Rest in Peace Jonn; I’ll try my damnest to be at your funeral in ANC, if I’m not actually taking part in it.
You and this site got me through hard times, as I questioned my own validity as a Soldier and Infantryman–leaving TOG to become a Recruiter, spending staff time envying those who were conducting (and dying on) missions, and becoming a cynical Drill Sergeant who questioned why he continued to serve while training the next generation who’ll eventually receive final honors for their service.
Thanks for the site, the posts over the years, and your service. See you in Arlington soon enough, as I saw McCotter, Hernandez, Hake, and Dickmyer only last week. My deepest condolences to your family and friends, and may This Ain’t Hell continue to thrive and carry forward your legacy.
Thank you to everyone else here as well. These past nine or so years have been just a little easier thanks to Jonn Lilyea, TAH, and the regular commenters.
This has hit me harder than I ever thought imaginable……RIP brother may GOD comfort your family and your memory stay in all of our hearts.
As shared by others, Jonn always ended his emails with “Welcome Home”.
A fitting Musical tribute to Jonn, our Warrior:
“Welcome Home” by Michael W.Smith
https://youtu.be/F2kGhXGg8kw
Johnny Cash’s “Hurt” keeps playing in my mind. Joe
Joe: What a small world
That song came to my mind as well.
[…] personal expense, supported his fellow troops of all services and veterans? TSO has done an amazing job of it, yet, there is so much more that can be […]
Just Damn. RIP Jonn and may your family be comforted by the outsized impact you will continue to have.
Never meant him, in “real life”, but if there is any place on the internet that I feel like I fit in, it’s here. I am thankful to him for that.
Prayers for his family and for his soul. RIP, Jonn.
“[B]ut if there is any place on the internet that I feel like I fit in, it’s here. I am thankful to him for that.”
And so say we all.
I just checked in after being away since yesterday morning when I wondered why Dave was managing the site. I am saddened beyond belief and for once in my life, at a loss for the appropriate words to respond, writing this with a huge lump in my old wrinkled throat.
But you, CPT, have probably summed it up best and most succinctly for all of us: Jonn gave us a place to fit in, old warriors of long past wars and younger brothers and sisters who have served or are still serving, regardless of our period of service, we felt at home with one another.
TAH instantly became my first stop of my Internet day after initially stumbling into it several years ago and thinking, “Hey, these are my kind of people!” I wrote to Jonn and he graciously agreed to post my occasional diatribes quickly making the site my new home among like-minded fellow veterans. As TSO has expressed, let us hope there is some way that we can find to continue Jonn’s mission. Chip said it above, Jonn would most certainly say to all of us, “Press on!”
Rest in a very well-deserved peace, old buddy. We are surely going to miss you.
Poe
I agree–Jonn gave us all a place where we could fit in.
Calm winds and trailing seas SFC Lilya
No words…it’s a gut punch for sure.
Prayers and hugs for all.
When you fall in for God’s pass in review say hi to my Dad and brother. RIP
We all pass into that dark night, many far too soon. May your reunion with past friends and family be joyous. Please say a good word for the rest of us who remain, temporarily, behind. Thanks for the words and deeds you let us know about. This place was / is one of the locations I went daily for the honest truth of the day. I sincerely hope it continues. RIP Brother.
Aw man, what a shame.
My condolences.
I’ll be lighting a stogie and raising a glass later on in memorium. 🙁
Wonderful Memories of Jonn.
Jonn’s Airborne picture taken Day One of Zero Week at Benning around March/April 1975:
He just got off the bus from Fort Polk, LA. A kid at just 20 years old.
And yes, Jonn was a Vietnam War Era Veteran.
Yes, we are. While he was at Benning, I was out west in Cali unassing a deuce n half, playing MP & directing training traffic. 🙂
May his eternal reward be all the greater for this community he built
RIP, SFC. Gone to soon, but you leave a worthwhile legacy. I stumbled across this sight only a few years ago. I heard guys to some real whoppers about their B.S. military careers, but I never knew how much was pure crap. Thank you for your site, and more importantly thank you for your service to this great nation.
Struck dumb with sadness and horror. You saved my husband’s life after he was medically discharged and bereft of purpose. Talked him down off so many mental cliffs and opened up a life line for us to communicate. I never met you, but everyday I heard about you and laughed at your wit and tenacity in the face of so much corruption. Your family and those who knew you, will carry with them the indelible imprint of your strength and compassion. May your family find comfort in knowing how many people you guided.
That is as great a tribute as anyone could hope for. And I’m sure there are more like you and your husband. Jonn would be pleased to read your words.
When I read that earlier, PT, I had the same thoughts. That’s as fine a tribute as can be written.
Such awful news on a day full of bad news. Half of my county is on fire. RIP Jonn Lilyea. Thank you for TAH.
I’m in total shock…
I left my house Friday with the news of the of the passing of another uncle of mine
And was returning home yesterday with this news
I had to pull over and catch my breath and reset my head
Thank you Jonn for pulling me out of a dark spot years ago after my retirement from the Army
I apologize for not making it by to say hi a few years ago
But we were tired from 8 hours of stop and go traffic just to say hi to some friends in the DC area
I figured this year I’d stop by to say hi and finally meet you
Fair travels. Rest Well,
SALUTE……
See you on the otherside
Our physical lives are dreams for our souls, but with a twist. Throughout our lives, we’re put through tests, and trials, and experiences, that our souls agreed to before we were born.
Upon the death of the body, our souls start to fully wake up. Just as death is an illusion to the soul, our physical world is an illusion. The soul looks at the body that was just departed similar to how we’d look at clothing that we’ve removed.
Except, our physical bodies are a form of necessary restraint on the soul, a “prison”. A necessary one, as it provides the headwinds against what we have to work with to achieve our purposes in life. The growth of the soul hinges on our ability to overcome our human tendencies to do what we set out to do before we were born.
At this point, we stop going by the names we’ve been known by in this physical world, but by our soul names. Our spiritual amnesia melts away and we start to understand why we live the physical life just lived.
From Jonn’s perspective, not only is he still alive, he’s much more alive than us. He’s also more free, relieved of his earthly restraints.
It’s like coming home from a brutal, rough, day, and being able to wind down in the most relaxing, entertaining, way, relieved that the hardship is “Done”.
For his family, friends, and the This Aint Hell family, sorrow is appropriate. For Jonn; however, we should be happy.
Amen.
I can’t get “Now We Are Free” from the movie “Gladiator” out of my head after reading your comment.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NBE-uBgtINg
I would tell Jonn, “We will meet again, Friend… but not yet”
Just, wow.
Haven’t posted all that much here, but it’s been a daily stop for a long, long time.
Had a few pleasant interactions with Jonn, and many of you as well.
Currently dealing with very bad news of results from MRI yesterday, and now this.
For all who truly loved and knew him-
God Speed Jonn, and to each other,
Peace.
John, I’m sorry to hear this. Praying for your complete recovery.
Jonn was not a religious man, meaning there was no path worn between his house and the local church, but from time to time on these pages, he would refer to the Creator, just that way. Once, I remember, he sounded as if he just might be ready to resume his Catholic roots. If he did op in one Sunday, he kept it to himself. My point is that his service to the world, after his service to the nation, could not have been better if he had been a churchgoer. This day, he is with the Creator. We should all be so worthy.
Softly love and to love softly,
dew upon a sycamore branch
by the creaking gate
where your heart hurries afterwards
through the path of wheat
along the briar, to that stone
under which you lie
May you find peace
From pain of your earthly body
As you rest in the Angel’s sigh.
I discovered this sight during my last (and final deployment). It became my first read daily, even before message traffic. Now retired, it is still my first read because it connects to those things and people I miss.
Rest easy SFC Lilyea. We have the watch.
Soldier
I was that which others did not want to be,
I went where others fear to go,
And did what others failed to do.
I asked nothing from those who gave nothing,
And reluctantly accepted the thought
Of eternal loneliness should I fail.
I have seen the face of terror,
Felt the stinging cold of fear,
And enjoyed the sweet taste of a moment’s fear.
I have cried, pained and hoped,
But most of all, I have lived times
Others would say were best forgotten.
At least some day, I will be able to say
That I was proud of what I was, a soldier.
George L. Skypeck, Reg™, Copyright © All rights reserved, used with permission of Mr. Skypeck
Military Historical Artist
*************************************************
I have asked George in the past for permission to use his poem and he always graciously agreed. I’m sure he would be proud to have it posted on this site in tribute to SFC Lilyea.
Poe
Unbelievable. Thank you for your service, both then and recently. RIP.