TSO’s dream. Who wants to loan me $1.2 million

| August 12, 2010


A friend who shall remain nameless sent this along:

Scotland (AP) – Drinkers uninterested in designated drivers should consider the new offering on Scotland’s real estate market _ the Old Forge.

The local is Scotland’s most remote pub _ with no roads in or out. Located on the Knoydart Peninsula in the West Highlands, the thirsty must hike about 18 miles (29 kilometers) from the nearest road or travel seven miles (11 kilometers) across the sea loch from the town of Mallaig.

Owners Ian and Jackie Robertson are retiring and seeking offers starting at 790,000 pounds (US$1.2 million).

Prior to meeting Caro, my dream was to live in a Unabomber shack in BrownNeckGaitor’s back yard. Prior to that, I spent a great deal of trouble figuring out how to get marooned, like in Cast Away. And now, this. The Old Forge. Or, as I like to call it, HEAVEN.

Dude, just go read about the place on their website:

Listed as one of only 3 of “Scotland’s bloody good pubs by Peter Irvine “The Best Of Scotland 2010” and with no roads in or out, an 18 mile hike over munros or a 7 mile sea crossing, the pub is the remotest on mainland Britain (Guinness book of records). The Old Forge in the village of Inverie, Knoydart, started out as a smiddy’s forge. Later, seeing better use as a workers social club where it grew up and became a pub. The Old Forge.

There were poets and trobadours, bellydancers, winkle pickers and tweed clad ghillies, blooded stalkers, musicians, yachties, dogs and more dogs. Moorings were laid. Adverts were placed in the Free Press, “Bring your G string, no strings attached” musicians played in return for a bellyful of food and a charged glass. Seafood, became shellfish became langoustines, mussels and hand dived scallops from Arisaig, speed reading Nick Nairn, Rick Stein a foray into sea bass, sea bream, trout, venison, wild boar, and anything else edible with gills or fur that made it from our larder… sea loch or hill, to kitchen. Bramble pickin’ and fungi foraging….. because Ian is a “fun guy”! Our food menu is a living thing. A cosmopolitan community of Ozzies and Scots, Gaels and Poles, South Africaans and Kiwis, East Coasters and French. Unions formed, offspring borne, customers became Staff and Staff became customers.

Dude, “This Ain’t Hell, now coming to you live from Scotland.” Tell me that doesn’t sound good?

Fricken belly dancers, trobadors, dogs, midgets, trannys, sea bass, and Guinness. No man could ask for more in life. So, who is ponying up for my wedding gift? As of right now we are only registered at The Old Forge, so pass the hat and don’t be stingy.

And once a year would be the This Ain’t Hell Hedonism Holiday, featuring the live music of Albannach. Clothing optional for those under 40 and 200 lbs.

Tonights Menu:

Tonights menu 12th Aug Homemade Cullen Skink, hand dived Arisaig scallops and pan fried sea bass

Category: Politics

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Blackfive

I’m in.

Jonn Lilyea

Check with Pestoff. Over on our Facebook page, he claims he’s raking in some serious cash with his lemonade stand. I’m sure he’s got a mil or two laying around he can give you.

1SG DB

One question though. How they hell do they keep it supplied with booze if it’s got no roads, and 18 mile hike over munros and a 7 mile sea voyage? Either you brew your own or you go thirsty after your first good weekend.

Blackfive

Pretty remote. A seven mile ride on a boat or 18 across some pretty “nice” terrain. I left the Infantry for Armor for a reason…

http://maps.google.co.uk/maps/ms?hl=en&ie=UTF8&msa=0&msid=106176847565984816532.000482f62fbb69dcb0ada&source=embed&ll=57.025597,-5.755119&spn=0.13678,0.308647&t=h&z=12

PintoNag

I’ll donate! Where do we send donations?

Future Marine

Sorry, all my cash is going to fund Gutfelds Gay bar. So far I’ve got $8.86 cents, all in pennies. And I would imagine the beer is supplied via helicopter.

NHSparky

You can get a goodly amount of beer, whiskey, and scotch in by boat. But don’t let my co-worker drive. He was trying to find the fireworks off of Wells, Maine, and ended up beaching his boat on the rocks off of Kennebunk–only about 7 miles off…

I’ve got to find a way to link the pic…you wouldn’t believe me if I just told you.

NHSparky

http://i101.photobucket.com/albums/m46/occasparky/anchorsaway.jpg

I told you that you wouldn’t believe me.

Susan

I REALLY hope some tidal forces were in action, otherwise, I assume he was incredibly drunk.

PintoNag

Good God! What’d that boat ever do to deserve that!?

Siggurdsson

Wells, Maine? There was an eatery located there recently profiled on “Diners, Drive-ins and Dives” on the Food Network.

I’d contribute to your pub fund, TSO, but…gee, I guess my invite got lost in the snail mail…

Joe

TSO,
You mentioned your wife would divorce/disown/kill you if you contemplated moving to Colorado. How’s she feel about Scotland?

Joe
AW1 Tim

Oh yes… you ought to see some of the tides along the coast. Up here in Bath, along the Kennebec River, we get almost 12 feet of tide, and we’re some 10 miles UP river from the ocean.

As to the Pub… we could always go in together and build our own…..

ponsdorf

Tim said:As to the Pub… we could always go in together and build our own…..

I’m intrigued. Still, my money is involved in paying off my 75 acres here near Nowhere, WV.

Jacobite

Ach laddies, sign me up! An could ya please set aside a corner both fo me with my hind end to the wall and the g-strings afore me?

Holy crap I wish I was filthy rich, this is right up my alley.

NHSparky

AW1–apparently, he didn’t figure in wind and tides–the island he’s on is on the south side of the channel going into Kennebunk.

And FWIW, there are damn few channel markers, and the tides even in that area swing at least 8 feet. The deal was, he was at that point at dead high tide when he hit those rocks.

I wish I had the pictures of the boat being pulled to shore. There was a hole in the boat, and it was drafting about 2 or 3 INCHES at the bow. Don’t ask me how they got it on the trailer.

AW1 will also confirm with me that a lobsterman out of Machias (north of Bar Harbor) was arrested for running over a (thankfully) empty kayak while he was running his boat drunk, and that Harbor Patrol found him slumped over the side (allegedly) after having “fallen overboard”. Only in Maine.

Bubblehead Ray

Joe, I explained to her how a weird confluence in the ocean currents leaves that portion of Scotland at between 70-85 degrees year round.

And I expect all of you to back me on that one.

ROTFLMAO! Uhhh I mean… 70-85 degreees. I remember it well… when I was there on my honeymoon with my first wife….uhhhhhhh Morgan Fairchild. Yeah… THAT’s the ticket.

NHSparky

Ray–was that the same guy that told us submariners eat better than anyone in the military–right after we had the cooks try to shovel down “cat turds”, “baboon’s ass”, “elephant scabs”, corned beef hash passed off as spaghetti sauce, and the COB asking on the second day underway, “Is this death milk or cow?”

Bubblehead Ray

ROTFLMAO. Yeah… same guy Sparky.

Mr Wolf

Ok, someone who has a bit more worldly experience in that part of the world has GOT to tell me..

WTF is a ‘winkle picker’? Seems vaguely Australian to me…

Sounds like a better name for people in Gutfield’s bar than anything..

Bubblehead Ray

Brit rockers that tend to wear those “cockroach killer” pointy toed boots are “Winkle Pickers”.

Bubblehead Ray

Hey, if TSO gets this pub I think I’ll get an old Mike boat and start a taxi service for the Navy types. Maybe the old Holy Loch liberty launches are still available as cheap surplus.

You 11 Bravos can hike it. LOL

HeartsAlive

I’ll be in St. Andrews until next June, so you all can start your journey from there.

AW1 Tim

Mr. Wolf,

A “winkle picker” is someone who harvests periwinkles.

See here:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Common_periwinkle

Sparky, Oh yeah… only in Maine. It’s amazing the things you will see and hear up here. Hell, just a few months ago we had a couple lobstermen on their boats trading shots with Ruger Mini-14’s…. the Fisheries Patrol took their weapons, but no charges were filed and eventually the rifles were returned because no one was willing to press charges or testify. Folks take some special interest in fishing grounds they claim as their own, doncha know… ayuh.

AW1 Tim

Bubblehead….. maybe we CAN get some liberty launches and set up a service. Heck, even some old whale boats would do.

Smorgasbord

1SG DB
Since when do drinkers care how the booze gets to them?

TSO
If you can afford to donate enough to Obama you will be guaranteed the loan. Look how much he is sending to other countries oversees. Tell him you want to change it into a mosque and it will probably be a grant.

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BooRadley

I was in at Hedonism….

Caroline

I would actually be in for the remote pub, so what I really think it comes down to is if they have an internet connection that is fast enough for your daily WoW…

Claymore

…I could sell a kidney.

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