Totally legit
Someone sent us this one on Facebook. Apparently, the picture was taken at the New York City Veterans’ Day parade. But this guy is so SEAL, he doesn’t need to work out any more. Or all of his work outs are the 1/4 pound lifts at that Burger King gym.
I’m pretty sure he’s legit, but I sent the photo to Chief Shipley to verify.
Category: Phony soldiers
Now, I’ve put on some weight over the decades since humping a rucksack…but this guy has REALLY left the fitness program behind. I have seen very few real SEALs in my life. But even old, they were all in good shape. Where did get a uniform to fit? Looks like a surplus Coast Guard outfit.
No, you guys have your unit wrong. This guy is part of the extra big kind of SEAL’s, the super-duper secret squirrel ones, the ones that require the real heavy lifting. They’re called the elephant seals. I am now dead for revealing this information.
I think Don had this turd on his Facebook a few weeks back….unfortunately no story to go with it. I’m sure he was just “honoring a family member”
May be just my observation, but I don’t think I ever saw a “legit vet”, especially one who did 20 years try to wear a uniform when they were way out of shape. We have too much respect for the uniform. I would never want anyone to look at me and think damn those Marines are some fat old Bastards.
I clicked on the image and laughed my 4ss off on the name of the image….fat f#ck.jpg….that’s great….
This fellow is so big and so legit a DD214 won’t cut it, he needs a DD428 to cover everything including his fat 4ss.
Is there anything right with that uniform at all?
He’s DEATH BY SUDDEN CHOW-DOWN on any box of jelly doughnuts in sight, he can inhale the icing off of a chocolate cake at 400 meters!!
In the words of Captain Zapp Branigan, he’s a bubbling crock-pot of male hormones, all right!
This guy has been seen before, he is most certainly and totally LEGIT.
Good move sending to SCPO Shipley.
I have marched in this parade more then once. They come out of the wood work because of the shear size of the parade.
Perhaps I’m wrong, but is that even a real US Navy uniform he’s got on under all that bling? If it is, I would think it would be some sort of NWU, but it doesn’t have the digital, lots-of-multicolored-squares look an NWU does-it’s closer to forest pattern, if not color. And I can’t find anything on the Internet for it when searching ‘US Navy uniforms’. The colors seem close, but the pattern-no. I also swear I saw some Russian soldiers wearing something that reminds me a ton of it on some Discovery or Military Chanel show from times past. Could one of the Navy folks out there correct me if there is something I’m unaware of? Thanks a bunch.
Maybe an elephant seal
This clown is probably on APL’s board of directors.
You know, the secret one.
HOLY CRAP! It’s Large Round. He’s got boobs bigger than Jayne Mansfield’s.
I KNEW Large Round existed somewhere, I simply did not know he lives in NYC.
I’m waiting on terminal leave for retirement (May) and have been on a “breathe at own pace and distance” profile for some time due to some serious medical issues, but I soul never be able to let myself go like this bag of cellulite and chins.
Ugh, I hate auto correct. I meant “would” not “soul”.
Not NWU. His uniform was purshased at:
Svens Fabulous Uniform and Costume Boutique in the West Village.
@16-Thanks, MCPO.
I’m no fashion maven but I thought wearing white gloves after Labor Day was taboo.
Ballcap, shades, urban cammy…yup, totally legit…or something…
I think he might have eaten a SEAL… But, I have to agree with the facebook poster, he’s probably a Navy WALRUS.
Also, why in the name of the great and powerful Bob does he think blue urban camo equates to a Navy uniform?
Actually I am kind of wondering why he is not helping with the flag in the background.
It appears all the kings horses and all the kings men (women as well, Ex-PH2) are struggling mightily.
And this bozo in walking around w/ white gloves like he is some sort of supervisor or quite simply, “large and in charge”.
Turd.
I absolutely loathe all the idiots, like the one in the picture, that claim Service and Awards to which they have no right. What I do not understand is why they would claim to be part of a community that is not especially large which makes it very easy to find tout their lies? Are they just that stupid or am I missing something?
This fuckstick has never missed midnight chow at the dfac,that’s for sure.
@Flagwaver, that isn’t urban camo.
It’s aquaflage that had to stretch to meet his need to hide in the water because he’s a super secret squirrelly seal.
The stretch marks give it away. 😉
Awesome…can’t wait to see his official Navy photo.
@24. Ex, I thought Aquaflage was that digital crap that camouflages you to the water in case you fall overboard?
I would swear I saw some of that blue urban in the late 90s at various surplus stores as “blue urban.” I mean, one of my friends had a purple urban jacket like that in the mid 90s.
Wow, the Navy started flying blimps again? And covering them in camouflage?
@26: Flagwaver, you are correct. The blimp is wearing urban cammie pattern, which is basically the military BDU pattern except that shades of gray/white/black replace the BDU green/brown/black. The current Navy aquaflage has a much darker coloration of black/blue/gray in its pattern…
@28. Yeah, that is “urban camo” they camouflaged the blimp in. There’s enough “urban camo” there to make a fair-sized city disappear.
Are we sure this isn’t MCPO on his day off???
Grenade lobbed…. Back to lurking.
@30. MCPO would NEVER be caught wearing white gloves after Labor Day.
I am not a fat fu@k in uniform. I actually look pretty damn good in uniform.
I never liked participating in parades.Waste of firckin time IMO.Will/would not participate unless forced,TBS This guy is a shitbag.
I watch a lot of Discovery Channel AND Nature on PBS and I know for a fact that seals maintain a thick layer of fat to help them survive in extremely cold water. He probably grew his layer during Hell Week.
You guys, it may look like blue urban, but that’s due to stretching the fabric while it’s wet. That causes the digital crap camo pattern in aquaflage to become distorted.
And you are right: stretched far enough, it could well camoflage an entire city.
We have all seen Master Chief in running shorts. He is not a fat f@k.
Now that I’ve gotten a better look at the photo, I see where I was mistaken.
You are ALL wrong! He is the CC of the Manatee Division. That’s a special unit of the Unicorn Regiment. The Unicorn Regiment (formerly mounted) now only carries the skittles and assorted lunchmeats for the Manatees.
On special occasions, such as ceremonial Manatee feastings, lemmings are allowed to actually mount the unicorns but this practice is highly controversial and expected to be phased out.
I never knew John Goodman was in the Navy…
Holy bouncing blueberry muffins…..did that primary color abortion actually march in a parade or did get brought in on a sling load under a CH-47????
It was one of those Russki cargo choppers, Doc.
Had to go look that one up. The V-12 designed by the Soviet GKAT group, designed and engineered to carry 20 to 25 tonnes, highest load carried was in 1969, 88,000lb/44 tonnes.
I’m pretty sure he has to iron that uniform in his driveway.
@41…that’s still asking a lot of any Helicopter
I’ve seen a similar camo design in the AF – on a T-38 (which I’m sure weighs less than this guy).
@43 – Doc, my thanks to you for my first early morning laugh!
That’s the same urban camo Kanye West developed for his stage act that’s all dangerous and stuff, you know, like going to war ‘n shit….yup, he really did…..
Kanye West compares his work to police officers, soldiers at war
Read more: http://www.nydailynews.com/entertainment/gossip/kanye-west-compares-work-police-officers-soldiers-war-article-1.1542402#ixzz2n4tBVKN9http://www.nydailynews.com/entertainment/gossip/kanye-west-compares-work-police-officers-soldiers-war-article-1.1542402
I thought Spengler and Venckman blew up the Staypuft marshmallow man?
Master Chief Stand back hydrostatic test on middle button is at 150% and climbing. Do not stand in direct line of sight.
Veterans Day Parade: Fakers Heaven, makes my skin crawl. I bet some parades they out number the real Vets.
This guy is so dangerously fat and poses a danger to himself and others in the workplace … His blubber formed a union in protest!
You guys make coming to work on a snowy day so much fun!! Just please don’t lump the Air Force with this dirtbag walrus.