Music videos featuring monkeys, top five answers are on the board
Two things.
1) apparently there was some concern I was dead. Alas, no. I am alive and well and living in the lap of luxury. (Luxury is my alien overlord who loves me and pets me and calls me George.) Actually, just busy as hell folks, nothing to worry about, but thanks for the concern.
2) Commenter “Mr. Bill” in another comment informed me that Gordon Lightfoot is still touring. Dude, wasn’t he like a drummer boy in the civil war? Dude must be north of 100 now.
Anyway, got me thinking of the Top 5 music videos featuring monkeys. Don’t ask why, just roll with it.
1:
2:
3:
4:
5:
This post just an excuse to fire up the dickweeds complaining about me. If I do die tonight though at the hands of assassins (which has been promised was imminent for the past 18 months) then I want my last post to be about jack and shit and have a maximum of 7 comments. I’d like to go out the way I came in, clawing my way up to just below mediocrity.
Category: Politics
Comment 1. 6 to go.
SO……
/what about mah ballz? Do you want to touch them??
FUDRG
I will see your balls, and raise you:
*Crying*….BBBWWHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH *gasp*….BABHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH]
*urk*…BBBWWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
*thud*
/I am SO stealing this. HA
Well, since there’s no monkey in it – I guess I’ll refrain from posting anything about Chef’s favorite cookies – even though you’re talking about balls above.
(smile)
Yeah,
I posted that for the DRG the other day, in hopes that they were looking for a lunchtime snack.
But… monkeys are assholes
I dunno. I’ve always liked this one:
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hxMMrPoBq0M&w=560&h=315%5D
Huh. Lemme try this one, then:
And then who can forget the “trunk monkey”?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HNY8eYmzdH4
For us old farts…
Veritas Omnia Vincit…Thanks for that “way back trip”.
Yep, I remember those. They probably wouldn’t be allowed to make commercials like that now, someone would be offended.
Here is #7.
Don’t go down without a fight.
Well, someone had to do it:
Hondo, Neil Diamond should have been spanked for letting the Monkees cover this. But, then again, when it goes gold in two days on advanced sales, that’s hard to argue with. I just hope Neil got a piece of every single.
And this one, http://youtu.be/ksJ6QP8BYn0
Another take on it –
“No actual monkeys were harmed in the making of this cartoon”…**Kinda NSFW language at the end*.
Now, Jonn – TSO said monkeys, not jackasses.
Hey, Psaul “The dickless” Wickre. How bout you just go pound sand up your ass you pathetic excuse for a homo-sapien.
You could fuck up a wet dream, you are that incompetent. Also, please tell me what fore-knoledge is? Is that like ‘foreknowledge’ you racist waste of sperm?
I anxiously await your payback to hit, I’m sure it will be just as effective as all the other threats that have been thrown out by you and the rest of the Dutch Rudder gang.
Now run along and take your meds before you hurt yourself trying to think too much.
Fore-knoledge is his experience with Phildo’s foreskin… From what I hear old Paul was first chair playing the skin flute at his old job…
I thought foreknowledge had something to do with golf balls.
Hey Psaul,
The 1960’s just called and they want you to know the word “negro” and or “negroes” are no longer fashionable in most parts.
Yeah. And it’s not okay to say “Colored People” either; but, you CAN say “People of Color” …. [aside: go figure!]
The preposition makes it sound more intellectual.
Is that 48 hours he’s talking about inclusive of the Daylight Savings Time one hour adjustment? Does the 48 hours “spring forward”, or did he mean “48 REAL hours from now”? I’m confused just thinking about it. Talk it over with your MESNA cheesgobbler Psul. Maybe he con run it through his SETI at Home computer. Get back to me with a Viking answer. #ambiguousthreatssuck
I’ve been noticing that there are a bunch of smartasses on this site.
Just want to say Bravo Zulu!
Don’t drink before 6 pm and don’t post after 7…
I know it’s time to quit when my typing starts to slur. LOL
http://text-drunk.myviralfeed.org/166986-8565436?utm_campaign=ml&utm_medium=ml&utm_source=ml38&utm_term=166986
He is simian like, but lacking in the intellect required to be comfortably grouped with simians.
Psul, the snow at Parklawn should be melted enough by now for you to see if anyone left you a gift. Enjoy!
Honestly, reading that makes me wish that I had access to his little butt nuggets of wisdom. It makes me smile to read his empty threats and wait for yet again nothing to happen. Pop, no kick, Psul. Pop, no kick.
As my dad likes to say “He’s let his alligator mouth write checks that his hummingbird ass can’t cover.”
Y’know, after reading the above from “Psul” . . . this just seems apropos.
I think that Paul K. Wickre’s theme song should be “Voices Inside My Head” by The Police. I have it on good authority that Elaine Ricci’s favorite song is (or was, if they ever find her body) anything from Missing Persons.
As to (slipped another in there) Paul and his never ending death threats, the shit is getting old. He keeps promising that my demise is on the immediate future, yet I manage to walk the streets of Philadelphia, and the National CPital Region, unscathed. Since you keep posting the same grammar and spelling challenged threats, I will not expend too much effort on ridiculing you, so I will just repost some of the classics. This will allow the newer members of TAH to see the genius of Hack.
Hack Stone, you are a cruel little man.
I have been waiting in Pennsauken for almost two weeks for a cheesesteak with mushrooms, no peppers, extra crisp curly fries and a street pretzel with mustard.
You have betrayed my trust in your ability to find your own way around the block without written instructions.
I will wait no longer. I’m going up to the Coach House Diner in Hackensack. You are so screwed.
Good lLord, he can’t even get the hosting right.
His and his minions don’t understand the difference between a site hosted on wordpress.org ad a site using the wordpress blogging software.
How in the world does this guy ever have the mental acumen to even flush a toilet?
But I thought his business was software and computer type stuff? Oh, I need a new mailbox. Wonder if Psul can recommend a vendor.
You think he has a flush toilet?
Palmer (Of The Ballsacks) Wickre, I think you’ve watched “Blazing Saddles” once too often.
A TAH extra! Newly released video from “Stately Wickre Manor”:
That’s a board meeting with key executives at FirsTech Solutions.
I may have figured out why the things that Wickre writes sounds like gibberish.
Two words.
Vogon. Poetry.
Wickre is actually a Vogon.
(hat tip to Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy)
http://hitchhikers.wikia.com/wiki/Vogon_poetry
Vogon poetry is of course, the third worst in the universe. The second worst is that of the Azgoths of Kria. During a recitation by their poet master Grunthos the Flatulent of his poem “Ode to a Small Lump of Green Putty I Found in My Armpit One Midsummer Morning”, four of his audience died of internal hemorrhaging and the president of the Mid-Galactic Arts Nobbling Council survived only by gnawing one of his own legs off. Grunthos was reported to have been “disappointed” by the poem’s reception, and was about to embark on a reading of his 12-book epic entitled “My Favourite Bathtime Gurgles” when his own major intestine – in a desperate attempt to save life itself – leapt straight up through his neck and throttled his brain. The very worst poetry of all perished along with its creator, Paula Nancy Millstone Jennings of Sussex, in the destruction of the planet Earth. Vogon poetry is mild by comparison.
An Example:
Ah freddled gruntbuggly,
Thy micturations are to me,
As plurdled gabbleblotchits,
On a lurgid bee,
That mordiously hath blurted out,
Its earted jurtles,
Into a rancid festering confectious organ squealer. [drowned out by moaning and screaming]
Now the jurpling slayjid agrocrustles,
Are slurping hagrilly up the axlegrurts,
And living glupules frart and slipulate,
Like jowling meated liverslime,
Groop, I implore thee, my foonting turling dromes,
And hooptiously drangle me,
With crinkly bindlewurdles,
Or else I shall rend thee in the gobberwarts with my blurglecruncheon,
See if I don’t.
Crap, I should have searched the TAH archives first.
Vogon Poetry has already been referenced.
My favorite Vogon poem is “Ode to a Lump of Green Putty I Found Under My Arm” followed closely by “Psul Wickre can lick the sweat from my sack”
Seriously, when is the mothership coming to get him?
The mothership came. The crew saw him. They left without him.
They didn’t want him, either.
Did he screw the mothership out of $50,000 like he stiffed his mother?
Paul, I know that you are reading this. When are you going to drag your sorry ass up to North Philly for the final showdown? You have been talking smack, unsuccessfully, for almost two years, and your shit is starting to bore us. Why don’t you take some of the birthday money you are expecting next week, top off the Jag, put $20 on your EZ Pass, and come visit me?
I offered them $5 to take the greasy little bugger off planet and they said they’d pay me $5 to keep him here.
It was a draw.
I would have upped the bid to $5.50
NSFW or anywhere else for that matter …
Nope … the zoo is fine, it happens there ALL the time!
MCPO,
$10 says that Paul sees this and the first, I mean *the* first thought, that pops into his is….”Hey I can do that”.
/”Better not try that, he’ll bite you…”
//Try the Veal.
He should, why let that 7 dollar a bottle gin go to waste …
Why not enjoy it twice?
C’mon you guys! How about:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q9hwZotllHc
And you should wade through the intro for “Lance of Arabia.”
That’s…. um…. special, yeah, special
TSO, you said a maximum of 7 comments. I am shaking my head over this. It is 28, counting this one. I am sad. You should have made that 8 comments, max.
Well, I lost a bundle on this. Sorry, TSO, but a buck is a buck and the Vegas line had you listed as follows:
Dead: 2-1
Comatose: 7-2
Holed up in a cheesy motel: 9-2
Following Tom Brady’s Laundry Truck: 5-1
The smart money said you were now to be spoken of in the past tense. Like I said, no hard feelings, a bet is a bet, and I lost my shirt.
I was “this close” to launching a hashtag campaign!
I’ve got the biggest balls of them all.
And how can one overlook…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JV-XEiUOjYE
…the Trunk Monkey!
Favorite Monkey Clip of all time!
Everyone is a winner!
Monkey + AK-47 = Mayhem
Thanks MCPO — I always love watching this clip.
Speaking of bets, when confronted with the option, go all in with monkey and AK-47!
Yep! AW1 Tim is a big fan, too. Check his post at 1640.
Estonia is really a place?
Golden Earrings -Twilight zone
How does this video post work?
Here, I’ll give a hand. WARNING: this is the European/long version. NSFW.
Generally, for YouTube all you need to do is post the URL as the last item in a post. Not sure about other services.
Nice and tanks.
I have found that if I copy and paste any website into the comments it will show up.
Such as this one which has 15 reasons why you shouldn’t text when drunk.
http://text-drunk.myviralfeed.org/166986-8565436?utm_campaign=ml&utm_medium=ml&utm_source=ml38&utm_term=166986
How ’bout Inspector Clouseau and the Seeing-Eye Monkey (Minkey?).
Please tell me someone else understood TSO’s abominable snowman bugs bunny reference…
I just had to look it up again when I read that. Laughed so hardbi think I fractured a rib
The Looney Tunes folks stole it from Steinbeck’s Of Mice and Men.
And aweemawacka to you.