Brian Stites; Crossfit phony Marine

| July 15, 2013

brian stites

Brian Stites is a Crossfit trainer with his own business and he has a hearwarming tale to tell about how he got addicted to the regimen;

Brian began doing CrossFit in 2007 when he was in the Marines. During a special operations training accident, Brian was critically injured. He was told he would never walk again. But, six months later, Brian had rehabilitated with the help of CrossFit workouts. As he recovered from injury, CrossFit became a sport to Brian–and one that he would excel at. He began training others in CrossFit soon after.

He was never going to walk again after the injury that happened during his special ops training, well, since he’s here on TAH, you already know it’s false. here’s what the National Personnel Records Center says about his career;

Brian Stites FOIA

So his active service began on May 29, 2008 and ended on July 4th a few weeks later. So he really wasn’t ever a Marine because I’m pretty sure that you can’t call yourself a Marine unless you’ve completed your entry training. And oh, yeah, he says he was in the Marines in 2007 (I guess to make the injury thing credible). It was a real Marine who knows him that blew him into us. I can’t confirm it, but the Marine says he was booted from OCS because of hemorrhoids. But that’s just speculation without any real proof, but it makes the “never walk again” story pretty funny, doesn’t it? In that case, six months to overcome a bout with hemorrhoids seems about right.

Category: Phony soldiers

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NHSparky

Master Sergeant–nah, I got my dolphins. Nobody wants to pretend to be a bubblehead.

Can’t imagine why…

E6 type, 1 ea

In Afghanistan, I was in the gym at the same as the Special Forces, so technically I was with the Special Forces in Afghanistan, right?

@50, got any spare berets laying around? Green looks good on me, FYI.

(Disclaimer: I am not Special Forces, nor have I ever been. Not by a LONG shot!)

OWB

@ #50: Thank you! I will wear them proudly, and wing it with fanciful stories about why I wear them. Depending. ‘Cause you know that you need to like tailor your story to the audience.

/sarc (Yeah, really.)

LostOnThemInterwebs

@48 hey hey hey! don’t leave me out, make sure to send me 2 I want to pin one on my back too, that way the babes on the other side of the bar can see I’m a bad ass ..

Now if I go to Corona and PT outside the grinder, technically I’m working out with them, TRIDENT all the way?

Now, can I trade that budweiser for “SF / Ranger/ 1Cav / Airborne / Sniper” patch? it will look better on my tattoo, I know its a $9.99 mall tattoo but hey!! it’s speshuuuuuuuulllll

LostOnThemInterwebs

You know I think I figured it out! just by looking at his picture he has this “speshul” look

DS – “Stites come here you bag of flat dicks”

Stites – “YEs shhuuuurr”

DS – “WHat is that lisp? remove that drool from your chin, is that even drool?!”

Stites – “Yesshhh shuuuurrr”

DS – “Ok Stites, you are fucking special huh? well you might end up in the ‘speshul forces’!!! PUSH!!!!”

Thus .. he WAS in the “speshul forces” just not in the “special” ones everyone thinks 😛

And with that I go to work (meh)

MGySgtRet.

This dick bag’s correction is almost worse than the original. Brian, just stop. You were not a Marine. Stop trying to profit by aligning yourself with the Marine Corps. You are going to hate the consequences, believe me. I am sure you left OCS on good terms. You are ruining that. Fix this and move on with your life.

Ex-PH2

OK, OK, OK — I can beat all of you wannabees. I can WRITE a book about the SEALs, without even asking Don Shipley. And that will turn me into a SEAL.

Won’t it?

Where’s that big red ball? I have to practice balancing that on my nose.

Stites, just drop the specops baloney from your bio and these guys will get off your back.

Veritas Omnia Vincit

@56 No kidding since when is entry OCS considered special operations training?

rb325th

Wow this dudes stories are just all over the place… rhoid problems, injuries that are implied to have occurred while in the USMC are now injuries sustained after his first attempt cut short by his bleeding ass… I think my girlfriend would laugh about that considering how much bleeding they do a month. yes dude, now I am simply ridiculing you, because you just seem to have a real problem with putting out accurate information about yourself.
had nothing been said here, you would never have changed your “Bio” that had people believeing you were Special Ops in the USMC. Poser got busted and now wants to play more stupid human tricks.

Joe Williams

Everybody, sites is talking about being a Poolie before enlistment. this is pre-conditioing for Boot Camp. He has not taken his final oath of enlistment yet. Sites is still in his hometown. His Recuiters happen to be Recon assigned to recuit duty. The Army is even doing this preconditioning to minize dropouts. After MEPS he went to OCS as his contact required. Joe PS sites just what were the 2 injuries thatb kept you from becoming a Marine. No finishing Basic or OCS , NO MARINE Joe

O-4E

@26 – Brian

Look man…read through the other train wrecks on this webpage and learn.

Just come clean. Right now. Make it public. Shit like this doesn’t get better with time.

For the sake of your business just come totally clean, apologize and correct your bio.

Follow the advice of VoV in #38

Twist

@52, I was attached to an ODA team for four months. I guess they just forgot to issue me a long tab.

MCPO NYC USN (Ret.)

I bought my son a US Army Special Forces figurine … it is so cool.

At seven years old he is the youngest “Green Beret” in history!

Is that how it works now?

USMCE8Ret

@62 – I will send you one, and will throw in a Pathfinder badge and a MOH certificate if you want.

Combat Historian

Hey, while on a combat historian mission, I caught a ride in the same ring-route UH-60 over war-torn Baghdad with several Delta operators. Does that mean I “fought with” Delta Force in Iraq? I want my top-secret Delta Decoder Ring right now!!!

Twist

@65, I have given enough rides to dudes from Delta, the SAS, Rangers, and SF in my Strykers that I am now world class elite. For some reason they loved using us as a taxi service.

Beretverde

There are two kinds of people…those that ARE and those that AREN’T.

Many are wannabees.

I saw so many soldiers…good, bad, weak, strong, stupid, smart, etc… not graduate from various schools for various reasons. Security clearance, PT, lack of intestinal fortitude, injuries (real and fake), family problems…you fucking name, it I heard it and saw it.

Bottom line…they did NOT make the cut and therefore cannot make the claim, no matter how hard they try and want to convince themselves and everyone else.

An example- a guy who gets cut from making the Dallas Cowboys football team (actually a friend of mine) is NOT a Dallas Cowboy..although he “trained” with them. He missed the cut…for whatever reason.

Twist

@67, The wannabees piss me off. I know I’m proud of being a run of the mill trigger-puller. I sprained my ankle bad enough that I could barely walk in pre-ranger, but I don’t go around sporting a tab or saying that I went to Ranger school.

Bobo

He also spent some time in special ops training for the marines until becoming injured in a training accident. Back in the day I had several SF friends. One was a black belt in several disciplines. I did some combative and weapons training with him. Another was a runner, and I used to run and mountain bike with him. I broke my ankle at Mountain Warfare School in a class that was predominantly SF and Ranger regiment guys. Under no circumstance would I have the brass balls to build a profile that said “he spent some time in special operations training with the Army until he was injured in a training accident.” While somewhat true, it is horribly misleading, and particularly onerous given the fact that the statement is being made to enhance profitability.

Beretverde

@68…Twist-I’m a fucking wannabe in a million of things: Playboy Club Owner-Nope, Space Shuttle Pilot-Nope, etc..

Says the great Popeye: “I yam whose I yam.” So I guess I’ll just have to live with it!

ByrdMan

Mr. Stites, (@26)

It is a shame that your Marine Corps experience didn’t last long enough for you to get some training on leadership traits or core values.

Did your OCS instructors get the chance to go over “integrity” with you?

bstites

We will have the bio down by the end of the day (hopefully within minutes). I apologize to everyone that I offended, those who have seen this and those that haven’t. You are absolutely right that I did not complete OCS and have no right to call myself a marine.

You don’t have to forgive me, but please stop harassing me and my business. If you’d like to voice your grievances with me personally, email me. stitesbrian@gmail.com I will apologize to you personally.

Veritas Omnia Vincit

@61 Indeed because right now the dude can still be forgiven, he didn’t make it through so maybe he doesn’t know everything he should know about what’s acceptable regarding his comments…my thought was say honestly guys I screwed up didn’t mean to offend anyone and my bio now reflects what happened I was injured during OCS basic training and separated…cross fit helped him heal, seems like a decent athlete with the program…

His next move will define his desire to be honest with himself and the world, I am hoping he’s a good guy and takes care of business.

Veritas Omnia Vincit

I don’t need any apology Brian, you man up you straighten out your bio and best of luck to you in your work and endeavors.

None of us are perfect, our reaction to our errors define us more than our reaction to success, you seem a decent enough guy I hope you find your success.

O-4E

@73 and 71

Ditto

ChipNASA

VOV,
@71, apparently he *NOW* gets it.

I wish SV folks like this would bow down and/or step up and do exactly this *MUCH* more quickly, if ever, and then we’d have a LOT less work to do.

/ARE YOU LISTENING Paul K. WICKER and Phillip Dale Monkress??? (GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOGLE HITS. )

Green Thumb

Another cross-fit wanker.

David

I did some range time with GSG9…. wow, I’ll have to add that to my resume!

Brian – re-read #56. No embellishments, no BS…. tell it straight. You can have accomplished nothing of note and still hold your head up… if you exaggerate and or lie, it ALWAYS comes back to bite you in the ass. Plus the truth is always much easier to remember. You went to training, you got injured… fine, leave it there.

MGySgtRet.

Brian, I accept the apology and appreciate you realizing what your actions mean to those of us that have served. I am sorry you did not get to complete your training and become a Marine Officer. I wish you no ill will going forward and do not wish to see you or your business suffer.

A Proud Infidel & Patriot

Kudos for “Manning Up” and telling the truth! I wish that the others would do the same, you’re a better Man than they are!

As I see it, the more one “lives their lie”, the more despicable they come, and you’ll see examples of the in nearly every SV thread here. You decided to “Man Up” and do what’s right.

USMCE8Ret

@71 – Good to go. Just fix your trash and make things right. You’ll feel better about it.

Your accomplishments should be a testament to themselves and you should be proud of them. Embellishments always catch people in the impact area.

bobble

Thanks for doing the right thing (although it did take some prodding), Mr. Stites. Maybe you did learn something during those four weeks of OCS. Now if only we could get some other ‘characters’ to follow through on your example. I’m not gonna mention any names, right, Keith “Big Dawg” Riley Keeton?

E-6 type, 1 ea

Bio is fixed, apology accepted. Hopefully this is the last we hear of Mr. Stites.

LostOnThemInterwebs

@72 I’m not sure if you will read this but I have greater appreciation for you; manning up takes guts! and please do take care of your crossfit buddies!

OWB

All any of us can do is what we can do. Thank you for (finally) stepping up and doing the right thing, Mr. Stites.

Many of us have had our goals thwarted by circumstances beyond our control and even by our own actions. Neither situation should be used as an excuse to not reassess and reprioritize our lives.

It sounds like you managed to do just that with your life. We can honor that while insisting that you not exaggerate your experience with the Marines. Done the correct way, you certainly can use that experience (and probably frustration) to your advantage and as part of your mentoring others.

Good luck. Perhaps this will make you a better roll model. Come back any time, especially if you ever need a quick refresher course.

bstites

Thank you all very much. This is a very humbling experience, and I am so thankful for the graciousness of the people posting here. Again, I apologize to those I have hurt and these mistakes have been removed. Thank you.

ChipNASA

@86
Regardless of your initial actions, *which* you realized, in short order, were mistaken, you have proven yourself to be upstanding and a class act(IMHO), by your immediate and forthright actions.
Good on you and I wish you further success.

As someone else said, and I agree with, your training with the Marine Corps, albeit short and not as successful as you had wished, obviously had some positive impact on you.

MCPO NYC USN (Ret.)

Alrighty then. Next!

2/17 Air Cav

Whatever. He says he was a Marine. He says he was in special ops. He says…he says….he says. It’s not as if his crossdresser workout thing was posted this month or, for that matter, this year. He is pulling it for one reason–HE GOT CAUGHT. Hell, he’s what 30-32? Screw him. And I thought I was soft.

AtDrum

I’d be more impressed if he hadn’t deleted comments and put the apology on the crossfit page…

JarHead Pat

Another 3 month’s and he will be calling himself a Scout/Sniper.then a SEAL etc etc etc.Let’s hope the next POTUS and our leaders really jump on this shit.Oh yeah he need’s to be throat punched in front of all his little crosefag buddies.

JarHead Pat

I got this a while ago in my FB inbox.take it for what it’s worth.

Hey butt plug,you should kill yourself for faking at being a wounded warrior in my Corps.One day all you poser’s are going to get what’s coming to them.FWIW,your a total loser,you even hack basic officer training,nice bro,nice,is it true you got booted out because of a mild case of hemorrhoids lolololol.fuck you
1:58pm
Brian Stites

I will reiterate my apology. I’m sorry for misleading people about my time training. I’m especially sorry to those I offended. The misleading information has been removed. I appreciate your service and graciousness in accepting my apology.

Doc Savage

Not Marine Special Operations……but I did stay in a Holiday Inn Express once.

FatCircles0311

“Due to my qualifications, I got moved over to the officer side.”

Marines aren’t made at Quantico, just butter bars!

Due to your qualifications of not being able to hack enlisted service? Or boot? Or infantry training? Or Recon indoc? Straight to “special forces training”?

You should like a candidate 03’s would pee on, dude. Even when you were caught you’re still can’t help but lie.

Anonymous

CrossFit obsession and stolen valor, one in the same disease? For some reason, its seems to be the same pogue FOBbits and REMFs who do both.

Hondo

Yeah, that one certainly looks like it has NOT been fixed and is still “rockin’ the lie”.

bstites

As you can tell by the url, that’s not a website we have even used. However, we took the information off that, too. Thank you for giving me a heads up. Again, I apologize to those I offended and appreciate the graciousness of those who see fit to forgive.

SFC Rowe

My “little” brother (he’s a giant) is a Marine. I need to start seeing where these douche-bags are and see if he wants to talk to them about their service in the Corps.

SCOTT ROWE
SFC, USA
Intelligence Sergeant

Trae

I always wanted to be a Marine. Thats why I EARNED the title. I am so tired of these pampered little guys trying to find loop holes in life for every little thing and shitting on my beloved Corps.