Thursday morning feel good stories
From Houston, TX
‘I warned him’: Woman, 68, shoots man doing private thing on bike who then chased her to doorstep. The sign on her door reportedly said, “Save the drama for your mama.” But when that message didn’t appear to get across to the man masturbating on her doorstep, the 68-year-old Houston woman warned that she would have to get her pistol.
The woman, identified only as “Granny Jean” in local news, was taking out her trash about 5:15 p.m. Tuesday when the man riding his bicycle while masturbating approached her, according to Houston Police Lt. Larry Crowson.
“She was alarmed by this,” Crowson told reporters at the scene, and the woman started back toward her house.
The man followed her — still masturbating. “Some guy pulled off his pants and pulled his pants open, playing with his thing,” she told KTRK, the local ABC affiliate, “and he ran up in my yard, and I told him to get away from my door, or I will shoot him.”
He didn’t stop approaching, Crowson said. Meanwhile, the woman’s 14-year-old granddaughter was inside. So she did what she promised and ran to grab her gun. The man kept “reaching for my door,” she told KTRK, “and he wouldn’t stop. So, I shot him through the door.” Crowson said she struck the man with a single shot to the chest, near his shoulder.
The man then stumbled back through her front yard, wobbled onto his bicycle and attempted to pedal away, Crowson said. Then he collapsed on the sidewalk, where paramedics ultimately rushed him to the hospital.
He is expected to survive his injuries, Crowson said.
There are other stories…but this one can have all the attention it deserves. Don’t mess with MaMa.
Category: Feel Good Stories
Talk about multi-tasking! This dude gets a prize- a bullet wound to the chest.
Can’t wait to see how Claw’s whiz-wheel scores this one.
Kinda tough to put the Whiz Wheel™® into action without having a name to use as a base, so we’ll go with this:
“Unidentified man doing private thing” (FLTPSM*) 50 x 9 = 450
* Full Loonie Tunes Past Shower Mold (Hat Tip to 25X)
I knew you and the Whiz Wheel wouldn’t let us down, Claw- we don’ need no steenkin’ name.
Bingo!! We have a winner-winner who gets no chicken dinner!
Granny Jean, probably a forthright and unambiguous soul in her own right, does not take kindly to this fellow’s socially unacceptable behavior, and he still keeps coming, even though she warns him.
I think she needs more range time with a good instructor so that if that persistent creature returns, she can provide him with a free neutering service.
Dunno, through the door she got an incapacitating hit with one round. Doubt he finished polishing it off, too. Sounds pretty effective to me.
Good on Granny. I wonder if when the case comes to court, will the perp ask the bailiff to whack his pee pee?
Following Dave’s lead: “Florida woman ‘udder’ arrest after cows herd her into cusody”: (Story comes with video) https://www.clickorlando.com/strange-florida/cows-herd-suspected-car-thief-into-custody “A car thief bailed out of the stolen car and hoofed it Monday. However, a herd of cows corralled the suspect and led police to her, according to Seminole County Sheriff’s Office helicopter video. Sanford police said they spotted a stolen Subaru SUV from Brevard County Monday near Celery and Locust avenues and attempted to make a traffic stop. The driver of the Subaru kept going, running a stop sign, and crashed into a ditch near Celery and Sipes avenues, according to the police report. Police said the driver, Jamie Young, 46, ran into a pasture to the east and the passenger, Jennifer Kaufman, ran into a cow pasture to the south of the crash. Another passenger stayed at the crash scene and was arrested, according to police. Young was found hiding in some bushes and arrested with the help of K-9s, according to the report. However, the Seminole County Sheriff’s Office aerial alert team continued to track Kaufman running through the cow pasture, where she would soon meet the bovines who would become her undoing. In the aerial video recording, the pilot advised Sanford police “for a good visual” to look for the “large group of cows” chasing the suspect. Richard Kondracki said he’s been living along Sipes Avenue for decades with dozens of cattle on this property. He said he has never had a problem with the bovines acting aggressive, but then again, he’s never had someone run through his field. “I think they didn’t realize who they were,” he said. “They panicked. The cows were nervous. That would make me panic — if all those big cows come running at you. They didn’t know them. They don’t know if they’re there to hurt them, or steal one of the babies.” The video shows Kaufman running across the field with about 20 cows close on her tail. One cow even looks like it tried to catch her, eventually herding the suspect to authorities. “You don’t want to mess with it… Read more »
Heeheehee! (Falls off chair, laughing.)
Don’t mess with mama cows! Ever!
One of the most a-moo-sing stories I’ve read in a while!
(I know, the joke was udderly ridiculous. I can milk it for more laughs, but you might have a real beef with me if I do.)
UH OH C W; Looks like I’ve got competition on the puns and yolks. Great and I love it.
Maybe the guy on the bike was on his way to go fishing. Of course you’ve heard of a Master Baiter. On a serious note, If the perp wasn’t breaking down the ladies door or didn’t make entry in one way or the other, would this be a justifiable shooting??
Jeff..read CW’s comments above…I do believe you have started a “Punny” trend..😉
Ex-PH2 is right…don’t ever, EVER mess with mama cows! 😁
Texas has a more liberal view of how a person defends oneself.
I don’t know why they are blaming privates; I am sure all ranks have committed the sin of Onan at one time or another.