Nanny Bloomberg’s comeupance
So this is really good satire, and they got me for about a minute, probably because I so wanted it to be true, until I remembered that there’s always something fishy about the Daily Currant. Regardless it’s funny and it’s really too bad that it didn’t really happen;
I guess Michael Bloomberg, the mayor of New York City who has been limiting choices of New Yorkers in regards to everything from Big Gulps to canned baby formula when a New York pizzeria gave him a dose of his own medicine during a working lunch with New York comptroller John Liu when they realized that they hadn’t ordered enough food. From the Daily Currant;
“Hey, could I get another pepperoni over here?” Bloomberg asked owner Antonio Benito.
“I’m sorry sir,” he replied, “we can’t do that. You’ve reached your personal slice limit.”
Stop and TiskMayor Bloomberg, not accustomed to being challenged, assumed that the owner was joking.
“OK, that’s funny,” he remarked, “because of the soda thing … No come on. I’m not kidding. I haven’t eaten all morning, just send over another pepperoni.”
“I’m sorry sir. We’re serious,” Benito insisted. “We’ve decided that eating more than one piece isn’t healthy for you, and so we’re forbidding you from doing it.”
“Look jackass,” Bloomberg retorted, his anger boiling, “I f**king skipped breakfast this morning just so I could eat four slices of your pizza. Don’t be a schmuck, just get back to the kitchen and bring out some fucking pizza, okay.”
“I’m sorry sir, there’s nothing I can do,” the owner repeated. “Maybe you could go to several restaurants and get one slice at each. At least that way you’re walking. You know, burning calories.”
Sucks, don’t it, Mikey?
Category: Satire
When I read that yesterday, I so wished it were true. If it had actually happened, the shop owner would have seen the Health Dept, Fire Dept, and more city agencies bringing stink to him.
This is so golden!! I’m gonna put it up. Yeah, this made my morning…:) Big shit-eating grin.
For one tiny second, I had hope.
Then I realized that it couldn’t possibly be true for this reason: Mayor Bloomerbutt is too much of a wuss to say ‘f**king’, even under his breath.
Ten bucks says the pizza dude has health inspectors crawling all over his place inside a week.
Sounds like wishful thinking, but would love to see it happen!!
The Daily Currant is a satire site. I so wish this story was true.
The Nanny being nannied!
Can we mail bloomass a bunch of empty pizza boxes?
I shared it on Facebook the other day…they got me…funny as hell though.
[…] Bloomberg’s such a joke that even the Daily Currant has satirized his “control freak” nature and policies. Everyone with a brain knows he’s […]