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E-Ticket Ride
Transportation Secretary Duffy Delivers a Reality Check to Blue Origin Lady ‘Astronauts’
By Bob Hoge
The ladies of the highly publicized 11-minute “Blue Origin” rocket trip might have wished they’d stayed in space a little longer, because after their cringeworthy antics upon returning to Earth, they’ve been the subject of widespread mockery. Singer Katy Perry has been roasted the most, because as Bonchie reported, she acted like she’d just returned from a 10-year trip to Mars and immediately upon landing launched into a Kamala-like word salad about how space had taught her about love or something. Left-wing TV news personality and Oprah Winfrey BFF Gayle King, meanwhile, said the short flight was “a reminder that we need to do better, be better human beings.”
No, it wasn’t a reminder that “we need to do better,” it was a spectacle that accomplished very little if anything scientifically.
Transportation Secretary Sean Duffy has some bad news for the girl gang though: they are not in fact actual astronauts.
‘”…FAA guidelines under the Commercial Space Astronaut Wings Program were clear: Crewmembers who travel into space must have “demonstrated activities during flight that were essential to public safety, or contributed to human space flight safety.”’
I’ll give them bragging rights for a unique, cool experience far beyond the means of actual, ordinary people. Nothing more.
Category: Blue Skies, Points-and-Laughs
About as cringe as it could be…
It looks like a giant…
They rode a vibrator for 11 minutes.
That’s pretty long for some gals.
That explains the enthusiasm.
They had no duties on board. The ship was autonomous (self driving) and did it’s own navigation. That means the folks on board were either ballast, cargo or at best, sight seeing passengers. Definitely NOT astronauts. What a monumental waste of resources / money for publicity.
To be fair, Yuri Gagarin’s flight was automated/ground-controlled as well.
But he orbited, reaching a height of 177 nmi.
Pretty expensive joy ride for Eco Warriors & Climate change activists. Let call them the…
And let’s not forget the appropriate response to Katy Perry’s post-flight commentary:
They were not “flight crew”. They were marketable cargo participating in a publicity stunt. Paid passengers. They served less purpose on this flight than Ham the chimp did on his flight in 1961. There are many women who accomplished many firsts and many great things in the space program. These women? Accomplished nothing other than to disrupt commercial air traffic and some of them look pretty damn good in spandex. Just another opportunity for Bezo’s Bimbo to show off her boobs.
Bezo’s Bimbo?….hey, give her credit, she put the, “Ass”, into Astro-not!
The ride of the glorified space dildo that climaxes by popping it’s head…Bravo!!!
Looks like Hack Stone will be hitting up Wendy’s this weekend.
https://www.foxbusiness.com/media/wheres-beef-beloved-fast-food-chain-refuses-apologize-online-burn-katy-perrys-space-voyage
Somebody call a doctor, this idiot’s got a trauma, or something:
So women are equal, but need extra protection? An attack on a woman, who is equal yet undefinable, by a billion-dollar company who doesn’t have a right to exist, unless they make rockets and slave labor camps called Amazon warehouses, is really bad?
I hear you loud and clear.
Who wore it better?
Bonus points if you know who the group on the right is.
The Villiage People?
Angels Revenge, AKA Angels’ Brigade, as seen on Mystery Science Theater 3000.
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0078778/?ref_=ext_shr_lnk
Ho Lee Chit, with a cast like that, how could you miss?
Alan Hale Junior, Jim Backus, Jack Palance, Peter Lawford are a given, but how were there able to secure the acting talents of Pat Buttram? That must have wiped out their budget,
Definitions vary, especially when technical distinctions can be made. While they are not legitimate astronauts in the eyes of the FAA, the FAA is not the arbiter of the English language.
Those vapid women deserve all the ridicule they’ve been receiving. They’re definitely not pilots and don’t even merit the respect due a flight attendant, but they are astronauts by the broadest definitions of the term – i.e. Merriam-Webster: any person who travels beyond the earth’s atmosphere; Cambridge: a person who has been trained for traveling in space [in this case, just being told “don’t touch any buttons” is sufficient training]; Oxford: A person who travels in space….
We can get very strict and use the etymological definition – then no one has ever been an astronaut because no one has ever sailed on a star (save those who literally sailed on a boat named the Astro).
Technically the Karman line, call it 100km high, delineates “space” and supposedly they went above it so they did reach “space”. As cargo.
I cannot wait to see Ms. Perry’s et al. portraits hanging next to Ham’s in the Astronaut Hall of Fame.
Ooops!
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ham_(chimpanzee)
Before launch, did even one of them say Shepard’s Prayer? Or sheep’s prayer?
Before his suborbital flight on Freedom 7 in 1961, Alan Shepard is supposed to have said, “Please God, don’t let me f***up.”
–don’t let ME– means he had control over something that could positively or negatively affect the outcome.
The sheep’s prayer is, “Don’t let them f***up.”
Them being the ones really in control.
Back in the 60’s, i remember dogs and chimps were launched into space, but this may be the first time sheep have been in space.
Valentina Tereshkova did the “All female crew” thing first.
https://youtu.be/-fWw7FE9tTo?si=T9n3I9qrjjrNzYTU
Iggy Pop described them perfectly
If I remember correctly, in the book “The Right Stuff”, the term for those who rode in a space capsule over which they had no control was “spam in a can”.
I propose we bring back that description, particularly in this case.
I would say this qualifies as “Stolen Valor”. There have been a few deaths involved in perfecting what has become an amusement ride for the leisure class. Like flying in a 747 (first class, of course) and claiming to be a bold aviation pioneer on the order of Charles Lindbergh or Amelia Earhart.
SST’s.
Sub-orbital Space Tourists.
Silly, Self-absorbed Twats
Astro-Cargo….
That is all.
I agree, the ladies deserve the ridicule they are getting for their pretensions, but on the flip side, many of the great advances we enjoy today such as automobiles and air travel owe much to the phases in their development when they were only affordable by the extremely rich. The interest and adoption by that caste, whether for scientific, status, or simply novelty interests provided and/or attracted funding to continue their development into something useful and accessible to the broader segments of society.
I have to say that they DID contribute to science…they proved that they actually KNOW what women are.
If spending three (3) minutes in orbit makes one an astronaut, that means most of us d’weeded deplorables are qualified to be an ob/gyn doctor. Right?
Uh, does it have to be 3 whole minutes?
Combined….??
I’d probably have more respect for them, if they actually put in the ground school and flight time for an actual pilot’s license.
Clowns.
The space program is going backwards. Shooting rockets up with monkeys inside has been done.
They should have taken Jeff Bezos (he is a bitch) with them and left him in space.
Saw this as well.
https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/technology/column-bezos-lost-in-pr-space-as-blue-origin-s-all-female-launch-backfires/ar-AA1DchCP?ocid=hpmsn&cvid=870273cee9204826ab47813257c5709b&ei=21