Nicholas Teausant; that San Joaquin Delta College terrorist
On Monday we wrote about Nicholas Teausant, the fellow who thought he’d make a good terrorist as a student at notorious San Joaquin Delta College and a failed National Guardsman. More information is coming out about him now and it seems our initial analysis was correct. We speculated that he had never been to basic training, and the Lodi News report bears that out;
According to a criminal complaint filed by federal authorities, Teausant was a member of the National Guard who is being discharged for failing to meet basic academic requirements.
Teausant enlisted in the California National Guard in April 2012, Capt. Will Martin said. Martin added that Teausant enlisted with the understanding he would complete basic educational credits required to attend basic training.
Martin said Teausant never completed those requirements.
“Basically he didn’t fulfill his end of the bargain,” Martin said. “So we were in the process of discharging him when he was arrested.”
In another Lodi News report, he had high expectations for his future with the al Qaeda in Syria and Iraq;
Teausant said that his desire was to be a “commander … in front of every single newspaper in the country,” and on the FBI’s top 12 most wanted, “because that means I’m doing something right,” the complaint said.
On March 7, during a meeting at a park in Stockton, the informant’s “mentor” — who was actually an undercover law enforcement officer — granted Teausant permission to join the Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant, and instructed Teausant to purchase flight tickets, according to the complaint.
The following day, Teausant told the informant he needed to sell his laptop in order to use the money for a ticket. The informant arranged for Teausant to sell it to a “friend,” who was an FBI special agent.
Who knew the FBI needed cheap used computers? The kid was unbalanced and had an over-inflated opinion of himself. He figured that he could teach the al Qaeda folks how to shoot better based on his wearing a uniform a few days every month. I’ve been entertaining myself with the criminal complaint against him all morning. Here it is (in .pdf) for your reading pleasure.
Thanks to Carolyn for the mountain of links she sent us this morning.
Category: Shitbags
UFB!
Everybody, altogether now:
“Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.”
Would someone mind hitting the high points of the complaint for me? Since I’m using my phone when I click on the link it tries to download it and my phone doesn’t even support PDF. Yippee! Technology!
Wow, this idiot has no clue
Sure Val. He says he despises America. He says he wants to join Allah’s Army and fight in Syria. He has no car. Claims two years service in the US Army. He has no money. He posts to instagram and an FBI agent connects with him, arranges for him to get bucks by selling his laptop. He gets a train ticket north, and is arrested at the border. The end.
The complaint is a scream. The budding terrorist’s Instagram name was
Assad Teausant BIGOLSMURF. He didn’t make it to Syria but Canada is close enough. This is dedicated to him: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mO6kjS8L5J8
Fair enough. He looks like a big ole smurf. :-/
Excuse me – BIGOLSMURF?
What? (falls off chair laughing, startles cat)
Threats against his mom and step-dad as well, huh? I wonder if that will bring additional charges?
“Shitbag” indeed.
the FBI should’ve provided him with a plane ticket. It would’ve been throwing a little chlorine in the gene pool…..
Agreed.
Help me out here. This dumb ass is enrolled at San Joaquin Delta College and yet he had to take “basic educational credits required to attend basic training”? Are these credits usual for a recruit now? Do all recruits have to have them or just those that maybe didn’t score high or something?
Sparks- If you don’t have a high school diploma, 15 college credits will get that requirement waived.
Just a guess, but junior jihadi might have been trying to get his GED at the JC.
He/it appears to be dumb enough to flunk the AS AB. Me, I took it the first time in 1990 with a cheap tequila hangover and I still scored high enough to get whatever MOS I wanted. I took it again in 2003 to come back in after a ballbuster of a work day at the shipyard, and got a GT Score of 115. That sniveling slovenly little snotnosed walking toothpick is obviously a product of today’s publik shckool system!
How does a skinny little shit like that take a shower without falling down the drain?
I meant ASVAB, stupid phone keyboard!!
This was actually a point of discussion in the office on Monday. He enlisted into the CA ARNG with the condition that he would complete his GED before his ship date to basic. I was unaware of the program, but others in my cube farm said that this was not uncommon now. Fortunately for us (us being the National Guard) he didn’t get the GED before he shipped. I have a feeling that he wouldn’t have made it through basic, much less AIT.
Now they have his laptop (for any evidence) and probably won’t need a warrant since he sold it to them. The guy is not too bright.
So he was like any of the other angry loser chumps that have been in the news recent years. Anger at their lives and anger directed towards a system that didn’t recognize their awesomeness. This whole “special snowflakes” syndrome has really gotten out of hand. It is breeding a generation of people that want to destroy not only the leftist chumps like Professor Meier but also everyone else.
I hated to say this but at least he thought to try and go overseas to let loose his rage at society and not become a martyr meme for the gun grabbers by shooting up the school or the recuriting station of the CA ANG.
Special snowflakes? 20 yrs old no HS diploma or GED? No real military training? If this is what the FBI is rooting out, the *real* terrorists don’t have much to fear. This kid needs a good wall-to-wall counseling session, not prison. Obviously has NO maturity or ability to account for his actions. QED, a child.
The FBI probably saved his miserable life. Imagine if, somehow, this #2 Dixon had made it to Syria. The only questions would be which side killed him and how fast.
Should have let him go with instructions to AQ to put him on the frontline. Either a) the village gets rid of its idiot or b) AQ is led by this Gomer Pyle until Darwin or Murphy step in, hopefully taking a few of them in the process. It’ll cost far more for us to incarcerate him.
From what I gathered this guy was a poolee who never shipped. He signed the contract and didnt do a day in uniform.
Screw it, I saw we save the money on the trail and incarceration and pay for his flight to Syria. One look at him and Al Queada will asign him duties as a “pleasure boy”.
With that Associates Degree and his level of “International” experience, he should be a candidate for All-Points Logistics Director of Overseas Sales/Operations.
I can only imagine his background check through Commander Monkress and All-Points Logistics will be hastily expedited and approved.
I would recommend that he becomes proactive, and fast, due to the huge influx of potential candidates that have been flocking to their (All-Points Logistics) job fair/expo in Merritt Island, Florida.