The Monkress References – a Service for TAH Readers

| June 10, 2013

Jonn’s closed comments on the original article about Phillip Dale Monkress; phony SEAL in FL.  At approaching 1,900 comments, the article was simply too unwieldy and took to long to load.  The discussion has moved to the new article entitled “Paul Wickre; your one stop shopping for information” (more about the reason for that title below).

However, newcomers to TAH might need some background.  So I’ll give a brief recap, with links, to the article themselves, of Monkress-related articles here at TAH.

  • The starting point:   Phillip Dale Monkress; phony SEAL in FL.  This was the original article.  It includes a photo of Phillip Dale Monkress wearing a SEAL badge (the Trident); documentation of past public claims by Monkress of being a SEAL; and a reply to a FOIA request concerning Monkress’ military records from the National Personnel Records Center in Saint Louis, MO – the Federal activity that has archive responsibility of every veteran’s official military records after they leave the service.  (Bottom line:  no, Monkress was never a SEAL.)  In the comments, it also provides the entry for one each loyal follower of Monkress, Paul Kevin Wickre (more on him later).
  • Additional background: the nearly 1,900 comments to the first article aren’t the whole story (quite a number were deleted because they either (a) included personal information like SSNs and/or financial info, or (2) were completely inane attempts to trash TAH’s server by literally posting somewhere over 100,000 digits of the decimal expansion of the number PI, and maybe closer to 1,000,000 – more about those below).  The article titled Phillip Dale Monkress, “All-Points Logistics”, and a metric shitton of the Federal money he’s getting gives background on the amount of Federal business gained by Monkress’ company.  It’s an open question how much of that might be due to claims of SEAL status and/or Native American ancestry.  But it’s also an eminently reasonable question to ask.
  • Extra Asshattery #1:  here’s where things get . . . interesting.  Apparently one of Monkress’ underlings/fans  doesn’t like the fact that his “hero” Phil is getting bad press.  So he apparently decided to try and crash TAH’s server by posting hundreds of thousands of nonsense bytes of digital drek (decimal digits of the number PI) in comments to the original Monkress article.  He also began posting personal information about individuals (SSNs and financial info), as well as calling and harassing spouses, falsely claiming to be a police officer, and other such legally-questionable behavior.  That’s documented by Jonn in the article entitled Phillip Dale Monkress; The continuing saga.
  • Extra Asshattery #2:  many of the claims and legal threats made by the Monkress flunky/fan in the comments to Jonn’s original Monkress article are bad – as in hilariously bad  (Some of the screen names used by the tool making those threats are almost as hilarious.)  TSO takes Monkress to the woodshed for these hilariously hare-brained quasi-legal “threats” in his article entitled Monkress’ Moron brigade still in Teh Fight,
  • Extra Asshattery #3:  the Monkress fanboi made yet another appearance, this time harassing at least one other commenter to TAH.  TSO takes him to task a second time for doing so in the article entitled Monkress’ Minions back at it, and still as bright as ever.
  • Exposure:  Finally, the Monkress fanboi appears to have been exposed, and owned up to being the culprit.  Jonn details that in the most current article titled Paul Wickre; your one stop shopping for information.
  • As to why all of this matters:  Jonn covers that pretty well in his article titled Shame.
  • Side Effect:  yeah, Monkress made this year’s TAH Ballduster McSoulpatch Memorial Stolen Valor Tournament.  He’s the #1 seed in the East Regional.

“Old hands” at TAH know most of this already, but newer readers won’t.  It occurred to me that newer readers might need a “playbook” to keep this one straight.

I hope the above helps.

Category: Phony soldiers, Shitbags

15 Comments
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B Woodman

GETCHER PROGRAM!! GETCHER PROGRAM RIGHTCHER! CAN’T TELL THE LIONS FROM THE CHRISTIANS WITHOUTCHER PROGRAM!!

Thanks Hondo.

Combat Historian

…”The Monkress References” is analogous to “the Star Trek Concordence” and “The Star Wars Dictionary”…literally indispensable to your daily viewing of this continuing melodrama…

-New York Times Book Review

Ex-344MP

@1

Ex-344MP

@1I was just thinking the same thing, sorry for the double post, it’s early, lol.

Steadfast&Loyal

Only the very best posers can be found here.

sure sure…I read any blog…but here? Here they dance and frolic like baby deer.

crucible

Lol #6

Ex-PH2

I think it’s fair to say that if you are going to take the time to read ALL of the blather from the blatherskite’s / fanboi’s stuff, you will require sustenance and cold beverages. I recommend a large pizza from the pizzeria of your choice, beer, bourbon or whiskey, and fruit. Fruit, becuase one must have fiber, yes?

Or popcorn, but if you’re going to have popcorn, the microwave kind won’t last, so get the kind you have to pop yourself and use real butter on it, not margarine, and get those flavored popcorn salts. Yummy.

All that mental and verbal diarrhea spouted by Monkres fanboi#1 allowed me to stretch my rebuttal and retort legs immensely.

It was fun, too.

Mark

Can I get the printing concession? Sell the programs at $1.50 each, I’d make ooohhh at least 2 or 3 dollars.

🙂

Nik

Dramatis Personae.

julie wEir

He’s just mad he’s so ugly.

LostOnThemInterwebs

So if someone comes in harasses everyone, fails hard at it, gets a minion in and also fails horribly and ends up being the number 1 seed on the stolen valor tournament we officially start saying he pulled a “Monkress”?

“Did he say what? that’s ridiculous, yeah he just pulled a ‘Monkress'” … no?

Nik

Monkress:
verb
1. To fail your way to number 1 seed.
2. To employ a minion to fail your way to number 1 seed.

noun
1. The act of failing your way to number 1 seed.

Wickre:
noun
1. The instrument of implementation in Monkressing.
2. Puppet Whore

ChipNASA

I’m going to stick to this but bounce to the other thread as well, as needed.

Hi All.
I’ve missed everyone SO MUCH!!!

Today,
Our mid afternoon snack is…..

FRUIT LOOPS and Hi-C cause someone here is TOTALLY HIGH.

You all can just hang out on your nap pad after you’ve had your snacks.

Cheers

*Radar*

” I wanna tell you something, anybody says anything about Iowa better be prepared to back it up, pal. I’ll give you a fist-full of Iowa naivete right in the puss! How about that? You know I don’t need you to tell me what’s what. I know what’s what just as well as you do. So why don’t you just crawl back in your bottle of booze and pickle yourself? Ha! “