Christopher Tirao; Rolling Blunder
Our buddy, Scott, sends us the research he did on Christopher Tirao, who calls himself “Rolling Thunder”, a name given to him by his Indian Great-grandfather. He’s probably the mightiest warrior ever to grace these pages. He says he has over 30 years of military service and he’s done it in every branch of military service (sorry Coast guard, he missed you guys).
Yup, he was in “Nam” three years after the rest of us pussies left. He even stayed in Iraq for nine years while the rest of us were fat and happy at home. Need his narrative of his service?
There you go, aren’t you ashamed of yourselves? Lazy pogues, I’ll bet you all only went to one service. I mean this Billy Badass started out as a pilot and then became a SEAL. Oh, and if you go read the rest, he was a Navy SEAL Aviator, too, a rare breed of man, indeed.
The President (he doesn’t say which one) gave him this $6 hat, too for his service in Desert Storm. I didn’t get a hat, but then, I wasn’t a jet pilot/SEAL/Marine/Special Forces/Ranger, either.
Highly decorated, you ask? You betcha; he got the Silver Cross and the Distinguished Star. What? You never heard of that shit? Well, that’s because you’re all POGs. Here’s a picture of them for you;
As he warned Scotty, his records are classified and no one can find them, cuz, you know, he’s so high speed no one can keep up with his exploits, especially not some high-drag records clerk;
He claims he’s Native American, too, but the Indians are asking “Who?” So he must’ve been a secret Injun, too, and the tribes had to seal his records so white eyes can’t see them.
I don’t know how he found the time, what with fighting all of those secret wars for the country, but apparently he has some prison time, too.
But if you have some time, you should click over to Scotty’s place and read the whole thing, you’ll be sorely ashamed of your own puny service afterwards.
Category: Phony soldiers
Nam, 78? Maybe PutNAM, Connecticut.
Wow! Amazing…I’m sure Hollystupidwood will do a movie about this assclown. Maybe if he’d studied history a little, and knew something about military awards, he could have almost pulled it off.
I’m thinking he might be the “fourth stooge”…you know the guy who worked with Larry, Mo and Curly..?
Well, I’d say this guy makes next year’s tourney as a high seed . . . .
It is tough to compete with a man that has been in all four services.
Turd.
Holy crap! I figured it out! He actually WAS all those things and WAS all those places… just in an alternate timeline! He’s from a parallel dimension where the Vietnam War lasted 5 extra years and where Saddam Hussein was deposed back during Desert Storm and we had troops in Iraq for 10 years following. And in fact, this guy was SUCH a stud, Congress created the Silver Cross and Distinguished Star due to his exploits!
And that also explains why OUR Records Center doesn’t have his file… it’s in that parallel dimension’s Records Center! It all makes so much sense now!
Wow fuck that guy and his caps lock key.
I’m sorry. I’m too astounded by the atrocities that this man has visited upon grammar and spelling to be outraged about his tales of daring-do. This guy makes me wish there were a provision in the Geneva Conventions regarding the abuse of a language, because if there was, this man would put his name in the books for his genocidal tendencies towards good grammar and spelling.
wow, they clearly don’t teach English as a first language in any of the four branches. If you read that whole page of his craziness, you will try stabbing your eyes out by the end.
He also has the Battle “E” on the Ribbon of Honor.
gotta love his “joint inter-agency west” hat….He either did time at a federal pound him in the ass prison or pulled some fire line time for the BLM or Forest Service…the west part tells me he was stationed out of Boise, ID. Too bad Ed “To Tall” Freeman isn’t still alive and kicking….If he were, he’d still be piloting out of JIA-W (Boise), point him that man’s way and watch the sparks fly.
15 years old and a pilot in the USAF. That’s gotta be a record! I mean, you got yer run-of-the-mill SEAL teams and SF guys, but a 15 year old pilot in the USAF? That is the very definition of awesomeness!
Dear Good…
I am such a lazy ass pogue! There and I thought you had to have a college degree to be a zoomie pilot……..or mebbe he did that too by age 15. Lessee…..time in the Nam, then off to SEAL Team VI (VI?). Yep, bet they were waitin for him with open arms.
Scuse me while I go soak my head in the toilet to get the s#@! out of ears.
I take back what I said earlier….I read Scottys blog post and this dude is seriously whacked! Anyway, just made a call to a friend at JIA-W, Boise. We shall see….if he was stationed there.
Another tournament contender for next year.
Nam in 1978? How did he avoid arrest by the State Department and the Vietnamese government?
Oh! I got it! I got it! He was probably a POW, too!
The Native American deal is legit…Liz Warren vouched for him.
I hear that Elizabeth Warren will vouch for him being an Indian. She remembers hearing his tales at Pow Wows while they were smoking the pipe.
#17 679Prig: curse you…you beat me because I hunt and peck on the keyboard.
Damn, this guy woulda been a great addition to the SV tourney
This is the guy Jack O’Neill from Stargate SG-1 was based on, except they had to tone it down in the show because not even the guy who played MacGyver could pull off something this badass.
Total PONGO. Gotta get myself some of them happy pills he is on. I am suprised Hollywood has not taken up this story. Could be a Oscar for best picture etc.
So busy fighting, he never learned how to properly use written language for communication.
If I see “God Bless” on one more con page, I’m gonna scream. He wouldn’t know god if he fell over him, and he better count his blessings someone hasn’t driven over him and his stupidity by now.
This is one horse that will get my vote in next year’s tournament.
In addition he is also a scratch golfer, a published poet and a research physicist.
If you don’t believe him, just ask his wife-Morgan Fairchild.
Apparently, all you need to do to prove Indian ancestry these days is to join a Casino.
I bet this guys a whole lotta fun when he gets liquored up at the local pub.
Hey guys; you had better behave and watch what you say, this dude is so high speed badass, he could kill you with his mind!!
A pilot… more like a shit-pilot..
geez, he sure pilin’ it deep too.
Score one for the good guys and gals!! Rolling Thunder AKA Allen Aho AKA real name Christopher Tirao your hourglass ran out of sand……..
What, no $6 hat for being a member of Seal Team Six?
He was at Ground Zero on 9-11 too. Of course he can’t talk about it. That’s all secret squirrel classified .Claims to have a million dollars worth of collectible automobiles but is shacked up with a woman in a trailer court in bum f**k Indiana.don’t tell anyone though. This is all classified .
Reading his posts was tougher than a meeting with two A.D.D. colonels.
It would be awful fun if he showed up here, though.
“Rolling Blunder” is a pretty good handle…can we do better?
This is the same idiot I sent you info on from his posts on the Indiana Patriot Guard FB page. Hahahaha. Didn’t realize he was so prolific.
I feel bad for this guy.. not because he lied, but because he is clearly a mentally ill individual who needs medical attention. I really do hope he gets the treatment that he needs.
I served from ’75 -’77 and was not offered a chance to go to Viet Nam. I would have felt more like a soldier if I had!! He
apparently wanted to wait for a fight with the Kmer Rogue!!
Can someone link this jackass’ Facebook page? I feel like goin trollin for a stupidfish.
Apparently, he deleted his Facebook page, but Scotty says he’s still hunting for him.
His Given Native American name is RUNNING SCARED
AKA as heap big pile of shit
Could be a Oscar for best picture etc.
Nah, Hurt Locker and Crimson Tide already have the bullshit military thriller genre locked up.
Not to say that they’re not going to try with that hunk of guano about Obama/OBL they’re talking about putting out just before the election, complete with pec-implanted Obama kicking down the door with a M-60 in his arm ala Rambo.
This is the account that the POS is hiding behind right now….http://www.facebook.com/allen.aho.58
Scotty start hunting again , that site is down now. Joe
Went to Scotty’s Hideaway, way down the page, the usual I”m getting a lawyer and you’ll be sorry BS. He’s gonna sue everyone.
CI RD, I heard, from a reliable source, that Morgan Freeman has already signed to play Thunder Thighs, er, Rolling Thunder. There’ll be a cast of thousands. That’s the straight scoop from someone who works in Harry Reid’s office.
Wow. Awesome. I do know a guy who has done Army, Navy and Air Force (really!), but his career is NOTHING like this guy’s is. No Silver Cross, no Distinguished Star. I’ll have to call my buddy and tell him what a loser he is compared to Christopher Tirao.
Is this blawesome guy’s ancestor Indian Indian or Paki Indian or American Indian? Or all three?
Man, that was a tough thread to read. he must have attended the same high school as Gunny Driveway. They probably served together.
#30, he actually single handedly commandeered Flight 93 and flew it to safety, the wreckage in Pennsylvania was planted by the government. The passengers from the plane are all living at a secret site in Alaska lest word of America’s secret weapon get out.
Another Turd.
It seems the drought has ended…
GT–there was never any drought when it comes to SV douchebaggery…only lulls in the deluge of them.
Futher Mucker!!! Were his parents way too closely related???
Seal Team VI? Is DOD mandating that units switch over from Arabic to Roman numbers? I have enough trouble with I through X, what would HMM-163 (one of the units I served in) look like? Will there be enough room on unit patches to handle all those Xs and Is and Vs?
@Marine 7002, HMM-163 in Roman numerals is
as follows: HMM-CLXIII