Samurai Squatter Solution

We’ve all commented before about the screwed-up situation the entire country is having to endure with squatters.  The pendulum has so heavily swung to the squatters that there are scores, if not hundreds, of stories of owners who simply can’t remove them, can’t evict them – and the law often favors the squatters when you discuss practical solutions.

Imagine you are Joe Homeowner, you inherit your mother’s house when she passes, and after a while you make the cross-state trek to prepare it for sale or occupancy – and someone is squatting in it. They intend to stay, and brandish a forged lease with some unknown’s name on it which supposedly grants them occupancy. If they won’t go, you, my friend, are the one in a hurt. The cops will bust YOU if you do something like pulling a gun – you can’t even change the locks or alarm if you want to. And the icing on the cake is that the cops will also say “hey, this is a civil matter” and walk away leaving you, the owner, locked out of a house you legally own.

Well, in Kalifornia someone has decided to fill the aching void left by the lawmakers and courts that just don’t seem to care about howmowner’s rights too.

James Jacobs had hired a motley crew of toughs online to help him clear squatters out of an Oakland, California, apartment building. None of the hired muscle accept the offer of smoke grenades. They intend to complete this job with the baseball bats and firearms they brought from home.

“All right, let’s do this,” says Jacobs. He grabs his katana and sets off in his long black leather jacket toward the apartment. His improvised militia follows single-file behind him. Half a minute later, they confidently walk through the front door of a two-story building off of Oakland’s busy International Boulevard.

Jacobs claims to have developed a long list of tools and tactics that enable him to remove squatters far faster than the court system, all while staying within the bounds of the law. Chief among them is a weapon he carries on every job: a katana, a curved Japanese sword that’s more synonymous with samurai warriors than clearing squatters.

If they were Jacobs’ only adversary, his katana might be the only weapon he needs. But ASAP Squatter Removal is engaged in a two-front war. His main competition comes from law enforcement agencies that are none too keen on ceding their monopoly on the use of force to people like Jacobs. Reason

Reminds me of the old bumper sticker: “Don’t Steal. The Government Hates Competition.”

The road has not been all fun and games for Jacobs and his crew – they’ve been arrested and had some interesting confrontations. But the linked article (which is long)  is an interesting read, especially seeing what it takes in California even to evict a squatter (a month- or years-long process.)

Me, I love the image of the katana. But if you asked me to clear a bunch of possible gang-member squatters with one? Nope, I want something reloadable.

Category: Crime, Society