Robert Mark Charles Hofer; another phony PJ

| April 22, 2015

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Our friends in the Air Force PJ community send us their work on this fellow Robert Hofer who claims to be a PJ and a pilot. You can see on his uniform in the picture above that he also thinks his service earned him a Distinguished Flying Cross, a Bronze Star medal with a Valor device, a Purple Heart and an Army Commendation Medal. There’s a set of Air Force Air Crew wings, Jumpmaster wings and a Combat Infantry Badge, too. This came from his cubicle wall;

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The Air Force differs in their opinion of his service;

Robert Hofer FOIA

Robert Hofer Assignments

About twenty months of service as a cargo specialist, got out as an Airman First Class and spent his whole abbreviated career in New Jersey – never left the United States. Of course, when our friend confronted him on the phone he was all apologetic and begged him not expose him. You know, after he had just finished telling how he couldn’t talk about the medals because it was too traumatic to discuss. Now he can talk about how traumatic it is to star on TAH.

Category: Phony soldiers

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rb325th

Funny isn’t it… these a-holes love the spotlight until they are exposed for the frauds that they truly are. Embrace the suck asshole, because now you get to live with it.

Doc Savage

wow…that was definitely the same thought at the same time.

nbcguy54ACTUAL

Stolen Valor Roaches. Shine the light on them and off they go.

Doc Savage

Always with the “please don’t tell anyone/please take it off the website” until they think its forgotten, and then they are right back at the bull shit SV games.

Asshole….welcome to the fame you so desperately crave.

Carlton G. Long

I can only imagine how many times this twatwaffle has “held court” in the company breakroom, speaking disparagingly of younger coworkers’ legitimate military service in light of his “grand achievements.”

Just an Old Dog

Screw this shitbag,,, he seems to have had no problems flapping his cockholster for years. Now he can live in shame.

Carlton G. Long

100-1 he calls in “sick” for the next couple days.

Skippy

1000-1 says he’s taking the next two weeks off

Planet Ord

just like Michael Humfleet and Shane Ladner. Those two always had a better story than the truthful veterans at work. Asshats all of them.

OldManchu

Hey there Planet Ord, what years were you at the planet? 1989 – 1992 here.

Planet Ord

I saw your name and figured you had been there. I was there from late 92 until August 93. It was a sad day casing the 7th colors and deactivating the post. PCSd to Drum after that.

NormanS

I was there one weekend. Captured the camp guard of a USMC JROTC platoon. I was unable to convince my squad leader that we needed to turn left at Albuquerque; so we got out of our assigned AO. B/2-159th Inf, 40th ID (M).

2/17 Air Cav

Bob. You really should have gotten the book, “A Handbook for Posers.” Had you done so, the first words out of your pie hole would have been, “Oh. I am sorry for the misunderstanding. I wear the decorations on behalf of those who earned them. I do it to honor them.” It’s too late now but you could still use the advice provided on this website BEFORE you halfassedly threaten to sue someone or other for something or other. It’s not legal advice. It’s just good advice on whom to contact and what not to request of the blog ownership.

2/17 Air Cav

He looks like a guy who voted for Obama. Twice.

Thunderstixx

Don’t you mean he voted for ovomit sixteen times ???
That is the only way that fuckstick won the second election…

OldManchu

“…and begged not to expose him”.

Man Coward deluxe. Can’t even get busted with dignity. Somewhere in his workplace is some quiet vet who has to bear the second guessing of his or her cohorts now.

CLAW131

One year, six months, and twenty-one days as a pallet pusher in New Jersey. Almost as bad as hiding out in the National Guard during wartime.

Let the 463L jokes begin.

I thought getting an early out only applied to overseas returnees during that timeframe.

ChipNASA

We we *ARE* talking about McGuire.

Well that’s IT. I QUIT!
Some douchebag A1C in MY fucking career field is a poser.
THE FUCKING NERVE!!

LOOK A1C FUCKSTAIN, DON’T. YOU. *EVER*. TRY. THIS. SHIT. AGAIN!!

Says the SMSgt 60591/2T291 Aerial Port Superintendent. I will personally stick an entire 463L up your ASS *without* a pallet stretcher.

😀
/And I thought I’d seen everything here.
🙄

rgr1480

Chip,

At least he’s not claiming to have been a Loadmaster!

ChipNASA

Who the HELL would want to claim that?!?!
😀 😀

CLAW131

Nobody, not even MSGT Soup Sandwich had to claim it, cause he actually was a C-130 Loadmaster.

That was before he took up huffing shoe polish as a hobby.

Yeah, Yeah, I know. Don’t speak ill of the dead and all. He’s still just plain goofy to me.

CLAW131

Correction: Not shoe polish but shoe cleaner.

Bill W

“Says the SMSgt 60591/2T291 Aerial Port Superintendent. I will personally stick an entire 463L up your ASS *without* a pallet stretcher”

Long side or short side first??

ChipNASA

Corner first so he gets the other corners in *SIDEWAYS* for maximum effect. 😉

ChipNASA

And definitely one from the Unserviceable rack, maybe with the aluminum peeling and warped. God KNOWS we never have enough good ones.

3E9

NOOOO…not the delaminated one!

ChipNASA

YES!!!
Nice. SHARP. EDGES.
That would be known as a “Taint Tearer”
😀 😀 😀

MrFace

“Almost as bad as hiding out in the National Guard during wartime. ”

Thats a curious statement…

CLAW131

How is it curious?

POTUSes have done it.

MrFace

I dont disagree that some POTUSes have done this. But without context, it seems to denigrate the NG; I assume you do know that most NG/R deploy as much or more to wartime areas as the Active Duty side. Not all NG members are of the same accord as those who want to “hide” from deployments. And most serve honorably.

🙂

Cheers; As I said, “curious.”

3E9

MrFace as a career NG/Reservist I agree with you. However that was not always the case and especially not the case during the Vietnam era from everything I’ve read and seen. DS/DS pretty much changed that and now the Guard and Reserve often deploy as much if not more than some AD folks depending on career field.

MrFace

14 years in here. So, I do not have the knowledge of what it was like during the Vietnam era. But I have heard the same. And obviously, the point of the topic, the guy would have most likely been within that era. Just rubs me wrong when I hear that statement “hides from deployment” when dealing with the Guard/Reserve. Maybe I got/get my panties in a bunch over it.

And this was in no way meant to disrespect CLAW, I am an avid lurker here; whom rarely posts a comment, and respect CLAW for the comments and the opinions, that one just didnt sit well. I guess.

Apologies for being a douchewaffle.

CLAW131

No sweat, no problem.

The context is back when I/we were in Vietnam 45 years ago, the hiding out in the NG happened a lot.

Of course the POTUS I spoke of was Dubya, who as a member of both the Texas and Alabama Air NG, he got so “close to the action” that he was a deserter.
Not to mention Slick Willie was smoking dope with the Commies while our troops were asshole deep in the mud of RVN.

So just think of me as an old fart who has BTDT.

Friends? –Smile

OC

I got home in ’72. Summer of ’76 I got a letter to report to Ft. McCoy, WI for a 2 week summer camp. They were calling all of us cuz after the VN war ended they couldn’t get enough bodies in the NG/R.

OC

Slick Goodlin

The charge of President George W.Bush hiding out in the Guard and being a deserter is an old one. For younger readers not familiar with the details here is a February 2004 letter from: COL. WILLIAM CAMPENNI (retired) U.S. Air Force/Air National Guard Herndon, VA. George Bush and I were lieutenants and pilots in the 111th Fighter Interceptor Squadron (FIS), Texas Air National Guard (ANG) from 1970 to 1971. We had the same flight and squadron commanders (Maj. William Harris and Lt. Col. Jerry Killian, both now deceased). While we were not part of the same social circle outside the base, we were in the same fraternity of fighter pilots, and proudly wore the same squadron patch. It is quite frustrating to hear the daily cacophony from the left and Sen. John Kerry, Massachusetts Democrat, et al., about Lt. Bush escaping his military responsibilities by hiding in the Texas ANG. In the Air Guard during the Vietnam War, you were always subject to call-up, as many Air National Guardsmen are finding out today. If the 111th FIS and Lt. Bush did not go to Vietnam, blame President Johnson and Secretary of Defense Robert S. McNamara, not lowly Lt. Bush. They deliberately avoided use of the Guard and Reserves for domestic political calculations, knowing that a draftee only stirred up the concerns of one family, while a call-up got a whole community’s attention. The mission of the 147th Fighter Group and its subordinate 111th FIS, Texas ANG, and the airplane it possessed, the F-102, was air defense. It was focused on defending the continental United States from Soviet nuclear bombers. The F-102 could not drop bombs and would have been useless in Vietnam. A pilot program using ANG volunteer pilots in F-102s (called Palace Alert) was scrapped quickly after the airplane proved to be unsuitable to the war effort. Ironically, Lt. Bush did inquire about this program but was advised by an ANG supervisor (Maj. Maurice Udell, retired) that he did not have the desired experience (500 hours) at the time and that the program was winding down and not accepting… Read more »

NormanS

Damn! Hit the big red button in error!

Anyway, NG was a place to dodge the draft during the Vietnam war. After a year-and-a-half on Active Duty, and three more in the IRR, I enlisted in the CA-ARNG. On my first IDT, I fell back on my 561st M.P. attitude and showed up breaking starch, shiny boots, and burr haircut … to find a bunch of slovenly hippies lollygagging on the armory floor.

They teased me mercilessly, because the war was already over, and they thought I was starting a six-year term. They stopped laughing when I told them I was on a one-year enlistment for prior service; most of them still had more time to ETS than I.

P.S. I stuck around for 21-1/2 years; and tried to do my part to change the Guard from partying to professional soldiering.

3/17 Air Cav

Claw……..My son is stationed at McGuire. I believe he has the same MOS. That’s where the similarity ends. My son is a E-6, has been in about 12 years and has made multiple deployments. I can’t wait to have a discussion with him about this guy! Hmm, wonder if my son has his CIB yet? Smile

CLAW131

Steve, CIB = Career In Baggage?

Big Smile !!

How are you getting along? Better as each day goes by, I hope.

Later, Tater. You are still “That Guy”

3/17 Air Cav

Claw….thanks for asking. Doing better. I had more family drama the past weekend with daughter in law and her dimwit hubby. Tell you more on open thread this weekend.

Take care
Steve

Green Thumb

I bet this dude has worked the cocktail party circuit with his stories.

Maggot.

Eggs

Claims to be a PJ and a pilot – I wonder if there’s a story of the time he saved himself to go with that.

CLAW131

A traumatic? Fire Guard Badge.(NDSM) And then he doesn’t even wear it. Pffft.

Purple Heart w/OLC, Air Medal w/3OLC, then an ARCOM? WTF, did he once unload an ETSing from Germany soldier’s duffel bag and figure it was some sort of a joint service award?

Where’s Chip? He likes to rag on these kind of guys.

ChipNASA

CLAW….Look Up 😀

CLAW131

Disregard the “Where’s Chip”. I see he got here five minutes ago.

Get some, Chip!!!

Silentium Est Aureum

What? No Apollo 18 Door Gunner medal?

Skippy

Not yet but he’s probably thinking after everything cools off then he’ll play and invent NASA special operations tail gunner…
Bahahahahahaha !!!!!!!!!

A Proud Infidel®™

Let him claim that, the toad snot-headed taint-lusting fart-sniffing snotweasel couldn’t tell the difference between an M666 Plasma Gun and the last booger he ate five minutes ago!

Veritas Omnia Vincit

Under what circumstances is a PJ awarded the CIB?

Maybe 18 months and a discharge as E1 is indicative of of the moral and intellectual character associated with this individual?

I sure hope the lady who’s partially visible in the photo didn’t become entangled with this fool because of those tales of derring-do that are in fact tales of “never-done”…

ChipNASA

VOV,
Not to pick nits, but Airman First Class is an E-3.
That being said, yes he’s a douchenozzle.

You’re an E-1 (Airman Basic-Slick Sleeve, no stripe.)during Basic and then 6 months time in grade (TIG) you can be promoted ao E-2, Airman 1 stripe. After 10 months more time in grade and if you progress with your OJT and CDCs (Book work through Air University for your specific career field) you can be promoted to E-3, Airman First Class 2 stripes.
Looks like he did that but I can’t imagine for the LIFE of me, why he got out and didn’t complete his other 28 months of what is a general 4 year enlistment. HMMMMMMMMMMM???
😀

HMCS(FMF) ret.

Chip NASA, can I suggest a few possible reasons for his short time in uniform:

1. Real deal anal buttsekks warrior
2. “Reefer madness”
3. Dorking the squadron commanders German Shepard

Those were the ones off the top of my head and with only one cup of coffee in my system…

David

Three year active duty enlistments also existed; would swear I was told you could get a two-year hitch like a draftee until the mid-70s – a bit before my time though. 4 year enlistees got to choose MOS schools, 3 year enlistees and failed MOS school folks got ‘for the good of the service’ assignments. That threat of “right now the service needs cooks, infantry, and tankers” turned me from a mediocre student to the Honor Grad.

SFC D

I knew a generator mechanic, 2 year enlistment. That was 1988.

johca

The Air Force did not offer a three year enlistment option during the 1950s, 1960s, 1970s, 1980s, 1990s, etc.

Veritas Omnia Vincit

Thanks for the correction…I agree that an 18 month enlistment is somewhat questionable which is why I was wondering what this fuckstick did to get popped? Or were they just tired of his lackluster turd antics and sent him packing without reduction? Was that easier than a disciplinary pop?

JohnE

We had a 2 year enlistment around the 06 time frame…at least for AF/SF types. Kids were getting in, getting trained to 5 level and getting out…frustrating. As soon as they finished in processing and figuring out where everything was, they started out processing.

2/17 Air Cav

Airman First Class is an E1? I thought it was an E3, like a PFC. Holy good night.

ChipNASA

You’re correct.

CLAW131

A1C = E-3. Yep, Dragon Fly Wings.

Skippy

Mosquitoe wings.

Skippy

Damn… Is E-1 Pvt ^^^^^^^^^^^

Ex-PH2

Claw, on behalf of all dragonflies, please do not cast aspersions on dragonflies.

Dragonflies eat mosquitoes. They have a definite use as beneficial insects. They also have an interesting sex life. I’ve photographed enough of them doing whoopee call to be surprised by nothing any more.

Mosquitoes, on the other hand, are pests, whiny attention whores, bloodsuckers, and nasty disease spreaders. They serve no useful purpose other than as main course for fish, small birds, and dragonflies.

CLAW131

Ex, OK. My bad.(smile)

It was an entry I picked up from the WIKI page that struck me kind of funny.

In the Army we called a Private E-2’s rank “Skeeter Wings” and the WIKI said the nickname for an Air Force two striper (A1C) was “Dragon Fly Wings”

Watched lots and lots dragon flys doing their thing while catfishing. Even seen them doubling and tripling up on each other to the point of being not “airworthy” and becoming a meal for blue gills and crappies.

Taco Bell

The best part is this guy works for the FAA, “Yep we’re here to help” guys. Thinking the Feds may not take kindly to his little act.

GDContractor

Maybe he is the wind beneath Birdbath’s wings.

Ex-PH2

Maybe he is mostly wind.

Veritas Omnia Vincit

If by wind you mean the putrid flatulence that creates the musky atmosphere at APL, then yes you are correct.

clamsgotlegs

I wonder what he listed on his federal employment application?

If he embellished his service record on a federal employment application…well that lie might leave an even bigger mark.

GDContractor

He has a namesake that was the real deal Ralph K. Hofer. Had a book written about him “Kidd Hofer– The Last of the Screwball Aces”
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ralph_K._Hofer

I bet he has been trying to cash in on that.

Bobo

Well, Wrightstown can be almost as dangerous as Vietnam, especially if you were frequenting Nite Dippers.

HMCS(FMF) ret.

Well Bobbo the phony PJ… your fucking famous now, BYTCH! Did you really think that you would get away with this forever?

Time for another GOOGLE PIMP SLAP for ROBERT MARK CHARLES HOFER, PHONY PJ!

3E9

Welcome to the fame you so richly deserve you DIPSHIT. Now shut up and go away and quit flapping your cock hole about your exploits.

Ex-PH2

On behalf of the 53 Air Force nurses who lost their lives when their plane crashed, leaving Vietnam, during the orphan flight:

FUCK THIS ASSHOLE SIDEWAYS. MAY HE EAT SHIT AND DIE PAINFULLY.

2/17 Air Cav

Huh?

Ex-PH2

Sorry, AirCav, I mean to type in ‘3’ and hit the ‘5’ key, too.

I was referring to the crash of a C-5A leaving Vietnam during Operation Babylift in 1975. Some of the women were nurses.

Operation Babylift: The following women were killed in the crash, outside Saigon, of the C5-A Galaxy transporting Vietnamese children out of the country on April 4, 1975. All of the women were working for various U.S. government agencies in Saigon at the time of their deaths with the exception of Theresa Drye (a child) and Laurie Stark (a teacher). Sharon Wesley had previously worked for both the American Red Cross and Army Special Services. She chose to stay on in Vietnam after the pullout of U.S. military forces in 1973.

Barbara Adams

Clara Bayot

Nova Bell

Arleta Bertwell

Helen Blackburn

Ann Bottorff

Celeste Brown

Vivienne Clark

Juanita Creel

Mary Ann Crouch

Dorothy Curtiss

Twila Donelson

Helen Drye

Theresa Drye

Mary Lyn Eichen

Elizabeth Fugino

Ruthanne Gasper

Beverly Herbert

Penelope Hindman

Vera Hollibaugh

Dorothy Howard

Barbara Kauvulia

Mary Therese Klinker

Barbara Maier

Rebecca Martin

Sara Martini

Martha Middlebrook

Katherine Moore

Marta Moschkin

Marion Polgrean

June Poulton

Joan Pray

Sayonna Randall

Anne Reynolds

Marjorie Snow

Laurie Stark

Barbara Stout

Doris Jean Watkins

Sharon Wesley

A Proud Infidel®™

A definite shoo-in for membership in The Dutch Rudder Gang!!

FasterThanFastjack

From my hometown? I hope he went back. I *PRAY* he went back. I could go hunting for my next birthday.

Combat Historian

Dude, you should’ve been happy to proudly wear that NDSM medal on your jacket, but NO! you had to go ahead and screw yourself over with the phony bling and PJ patch from the surplus store. You’re famous now as a poser and phony, hope you can live with that…

Skippy

So is it me or have all the Posers chosen wensday to come out of the closet ?????
And get caught ???? Playing soldier ?????
Just saying????? LMAO !!!!!!!!!

jjak

Still waiting for the phonie that claims to be a cargo specialist or truck driver. Or the real jackpot, an SF-type claiming to be an one stint truck driver.

Dustoff

Why don’t these “high speed” PJ posers ever profess to be plain old Army Flight Medics…I guess unarmed Medevac just isn’t badass enough. I feel unloved,

Skippy

Dustoff. The current Fad !!!!! With these turds Seems like PJs before this we were on a Ranger binge then the seals and MARSOC. SF… I would think they are running out of crap to pose but I’ll keep my Trap closed. But if you are patient you never know what’s going to come out of the cracks nowadays

SFC D

Nobody ever poses as Signal Corps either

CLAW131

Same here. Not feeling any love. Nobody (yet) wants to pose as a “Fighting” Quartermaster Corps soldier.

But maybe one of these days we will get a Supply Clerk (sheets and pillow case counter), a motor pool parts clerk or a MOGAS/Diesel pump dispenser operator.

But the one I’m really waiting on will be the dumbass posing as a Bath and Laundry Specialist or a Porta Potty Coordinator.

Planet Ord

I actually had one of those MOS and also pumped my fair share of diesel and MOGAS helping out the POL guys.