Well, This Is New
A suspect is in custody in Florida today after attempting – unsuccessfully – to rob a convenience store.
Of course, someone trying to rob a convenience store is nothing new. What was novel was the would-be robber’s choice of weapon – a cattle prod.
Seriously.
The would-be robber, 26-year-old Lance Tomberlin, actually used his cattle prod on the clerk more than once. And it looks like that ended up being his undoing.
You see, the store clerk was exercising his right to “concealed carry” – and decided enough was enough. The clerk produced his pistol. (No word on whether or not the clerk also produced his rapier, or told the would-be robber to “stand and deliver”. [smile])
Tomberlin then left the store pronto and was later apprehended by Leon County, FL, sheriff’s deputies. He is now in custody, awaiting trial on charges of armed robbery and aggravated battery.
Chalk up another crime prevented by those “gun nuts” with their “evil guns”.
And no, MCPO NYC – you don’t get a prize if you can ID the musical reference. (smile)
HAH! When I was in HS we all moved hand lines (irrigation lines, for those that don’t know) at 0400 before going to 2-a-days for football. Friend of mine “slept in” once and his dad rousted his ass out of bed with a cattle prod.
Trust me: he never “slept in” again.
Well this story made my whiskey in this jar taste much sweeter
Adam Ant – What prize do I get??? 😀
Considering Adam Ant got in trouble not too long ago, you get the starter pistol he used.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-133244/Jibes-Adam-Ant-reach-gun.html
So the clerk was the boldest saber, eh? 😉
In Adam Ant’s defense, he couldn’t find a Pound note to write his note on…….
Adam Ant? Way older than that, Instinct. And after reading Jaye19K’s comment, this one should be easy. (smile)
LA LA LA … Fabulous … Finally Broadway and Popular Culture Content Starring on Broadway: Rapier in “Sister Act” Rock and Roll: The Rapiers reflect all that is best, inspiring and magnificent about the early ’60s British rock ‘n’ roll sound of Cliff Richard and The Shadows, Johnny Kidd and The Pirates, Fentones, Cougars (whose “Saturday Night at the Duckpond” they’ve made a signature tune) and other kewl kats. Popular culture and entertainment: Despite the rapier’s common usage in the 16th–17th centuries, many films set in these periods (many starring Errol Flynn) have the swordsmen using épées or foils. Actual rapier combat was hardly the lightning thrust and parry depicted. Director Richard Lester and fight choreographer William Hobbs attempted to more closely match traditional rapier technique in Three Musketeers and The Four Musketeers.[13] Since then, many newer movies, like The Princess Bride and La Reine Margot have used rapiers rather than later weapons, although the fight choreography has not always accurately portrayed historical fencing techniques. Rapiers are also often featured in various video games, in particular Role-playing games set in the medieval and Renaissance periods. The television series Queen of Swords features the use of the rapier in the mysterious circle, Destreza style favoured by the first swordmaster of the series Anthony De Longis who studied the Spanish sword fighting technique and wanted a unique style for the heroine.[14] He had previously used it in the episode, “Duende”, of the Highlander TV series. In the children’s series Keys to the Kingdom, the main character Arthur learns to fight with a rapier. In the Koei game Dynasty Warriors 7, one can use the rapier as a weapon. Sima Shi, Liu Shan, and Yuan Shao use rapiers as their EX weapon. The rapier is the preferred weapon of Richie Ryan, an Immortal and central character of Highlander: The Series. Irina Spalko from Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull is an expert fencer and carries a rapier, her signature weapon. She uses it to fence with Mutt Williams during the chase scene in the Amazon rainforest. The Spanish hero Zorro… Read more »
But Jaye19K is a bold deceiver 🙂
My first thought was Adam Ant. Or, to phrase it correctly, “Who is Adam Ant?”
I am waiting for Jeopardy to run an all Marine contestant episode. Contestants have to phrase it in a Marine question format, such as “Who the f*ck is Mary, Queen Of Scotts?”; “Where the f*ck is Casablanca?”; and “What the f*ck is inside an MRE, Alex?”
Never bring a cattle prod to a gun fight.
I bet he was shocked to be charged with battery.
Woohoo! A three-per!
How easy is it to acquire a cattle prod? Do you buy them at your local cattle prod store? How much are they compared to a taser? They need to be outlawed. No where in the Constitution does it say a well regulated militia has the right to bear cattle prods.
Master Chief, you left out the part about having a rapier wit, as in the scene in “The Prisoner of Zenda” where the Englishman Rudolph Rassendyll (Stewart Granger) and the rotten Rupert of Henzau (James Mason) are having a fight with rapiers and furniture:
Hentzau: Where did you learn to fight with furniture? I could never get the hang of that.
Rassendyll: On the playing fields of Eton.
Hentzau: Oh, well, that explains it. I never went to Eton.
Rassendyll: And Eton is the better for it.
I say that all those desiring cattle prods must go through a permitting process that includes 8 hours of classroom instruction and 2 hours of range orientation. After passing a background check, they will be issued a carry permit that must be renewed every 5 years after completing the original certification process again. The permit fee will cost no more than $50 and the classroom/range instruction will cost no more han $200. All instructors must be state-certified.
Comments?
@15 I have a question! Would they have to live-prod actual cattle to certify, or will prodding cardboard cows be enough to qualify for a permit?
HONDO …. what is the friggin’ answer?
Wonder if the robber was planning to bring the loot home to Molly (or Jenny)
The Obama administration is pouring money into a green energy cattle prod startup. It will operate off of solar power, so you know it has to be good.
Robber obviously is a Libtard and doesn’t believe in guns.
When cattle prods are outlawed, only butchers will have cattle prods.
@13 Your local adult book store will have cattle prods these days…apparently they are an important part of the repertoire in the boudoir in some circles…
Man, I long for the days when rock and roll was about a cool car and a hot woman….you didn’t need so much “gear” for everything…
Doesn’t this news belong under the Gay News thread???
Stick around, Mr. The Wolf. It gets better.
@15 – What about the mental health issue? You forgot that as a part of your background check. We can’t have folks with PTS running around with cattle prods. That’d be bad.
MCPO NYC: The reference was to “Whiskey in the Jar” – also known as “Kilgarry Mountain” – a traditional Irish ballad. Per Wikipedia, the song has been covered by a load of people including Seamus Ennis, Burl Ives, the Limeliters, the Seekers, PeterPaul&Mary, the Dubliners, Thin Lizzy, the Poxy Boggards, Metallica, and Celtic Thunder.
The lyrics vary a bit. Here are Thin Lizzy’s (Metallica’s version are quite similar, and include the traditional highwayman’s challenge “Stand and deliver” vice the “Stand or deliver” used by Thin Lizzy).
Whiskey in the Jar
As I was going’ over the Cork and Kerry mountains
I saw Captain Farrell and his money he was counting
I first produced my pistol and I then produced my rapier
I said stand or deliver or the devil he may take ya
Chorus:
Musha ring dum a do dum a da.
Whack for my daddy-o,
Whack for my daddy-o
There’s whiskey in the jar-o
I took all of his money and it was a pretty penny.
I took all of his money and I brought it home to Molly
She swore that she loved me never would she leave me
But the devil take that woman for you know she tricked me easy
(Chorus)
Being drunk and weary I went to Molly’s chamber
Takin’ my Molly with me and I never knew the danger
For about six or maybe seven, in walked Captain Farrell.
I jumped up, fired off my pistols and I shot him with both barrels.
(Chorus)
Now some men like the fishin’ and some men like the fowlin’,
And some men like ta hear, the cannon ball a roarin’.
Me? I like sleepin’ especially in my Molly’s chamber.
But here I am in prison, here I am with ball and chain, yeah.
Veritas Omnia Vincit@22, your reference to adult bookstores/fetishes brings it full circle back to Gunny Driveway.
[…] This Ain’t Hell reports that some dipshit in Florida nearly got ventilated by a gun-wielding clerk whom he tried to rob, and who really didn’t need to carry concealed, and didn’t really need a gun, because guns do more harm than good, and Piers Morgan says it’s stupid and a lie to claim that guns somehow prevent crime. […]
Another Obama Department of Wealth Redistribution(ODWR)field test gone awry? I bet that particular field agent is feeling awfully sorry now! So much for his promotion and 2% pay raise, too.
Geeze Us Friggin’ Holy Mary and Sweet Saint Joseph … always picking on us Irish!
MCPO NYC: I think the central character in that tune was Irish, and Captain Farrell was a Brit landlord. Molly seems to have been playing both sides.
I wonder if that was a fully automatic cattle prod, or just a scary looking semi-auto.
Nik–I’m thinking that prod could hold 30 charges. High capacity, indeed–who NEEDS a cattle prod with 30 charges, anyway???
How come this dipstick wasn’t seriously shot?
Definition: Seriously shot; wounded by gunshot so as to require the assistance of a Medical Examiner.
Actually, no real training course needs to be implemented. Just hit yourself in the leg with one and you learn pretty fast how it works!! PS. Dont EVER hit a 1300lb bull with one while standing in a 10’x10′ holding pwn with him! Bull gets really pissed really fast!!
Was the cattle prod orange, green, or grey? Ya know, because that’s the sort of thing that is really important.
How fair is it that the clerk was armed anyway. There should be a law. Or something.
If the cattle prod did not have a bayonet mount, then the clerk should be charged with general unfairness. Or unfair response to what he misunderstood to be a threat. He should have just let the thug zap him a few times with the cattle prod and take whatever was in the till.
The thug is a good kid and has turned his life around!
(Does that pretty much cover it all??)